Alpha

by Kim Faulks

  I scurried across the seats and followed, arms out, ready to catch his fall. But he was a stubborn, snarly male and growled as I came up behind him. Men like Alpha were so close to my kind…he could almost be my kind.

  I shoved the door closed behind me and followed Alpha down the path and around to the back of the house.

  “Shower.” He motioned me inside. “Make sure you get all the…”

  Blood. Get all the blood… I slipped around him and headed to the bathroom. My fingers shook as I unbuttoned my jeans. I wasn’t tall enough to see my body in the mirror. But the ache in my back flared with the movement as I turned on the taps and climbed under the spray.

  The floorboards creaked under Alpha’s heavy steps. I lathered the soap in my hands and tracked his movement to his bedroom. Joslyn was a mortal, a real mortal. She was someone to protect, like a fragile piece of glass. But Alpha was different. He was hard, he was savage. He was closer to me than my own kind.

  With him, I could breathe…with him, I could…

  I slid my hand along my stomach. Flesh trembled, my body tightened. I never thought about a man like that. To me they were the enemy. They were something to be watchful of, to be guarded against—to Hate.

  But Alpha was not their kind. He was an outcast, a loner—he was like me.

  He was mine…

  The possessive instinct reared. I slid my hand between my legs, remembering the taste of his skin, and the warmth of his body, the way his arms closed in, pulling me tight against his chest.

  The heat of a flame licked deep inside my body. Fingers probed, cresting tender flesh. The bedsprings groaned inside his room. Every sound heightened with the slow ride of my finger. I leaned backwards under the spray. Hot water hit my nipples, stinging, numbing. I stilled, head down, letting the heat take hold.

  I pulled my hand from between my thighs. Smooth flesh tightened as I trailed my finger over my breast. Alpha was in there, hurt, needing—just like me. My hands shook as I twisted the taps and stepped from the shower.

  One quick swipe with a towel and I dropped my gaze to the floor. Bloodied clothes sat in a pile in the corner. I couldn't put them on, not again. The bedsprings creaked in the room next door. I could almost feel him, almost see him. My fingers trembled as I dropped the towel.

  I was flesh and blood, fur and claws. I was everything and nothing amongst a sheath of lies. I was Hate…and Hate was me, but in this moment…I could be something else. The door handle trembled under my hand. Cool winter air kissed my skin as the door cracked open.

  My bare feet skimmed the floor. I moved without a sound, stepping out into the hall on the cusp of the kitchen and turned left. Darkness slipped from his cracked door. I stepped closer and lifted my hand, pushing the gap. The hinges groaned, tearing through the room.

  He was a dark blur under the sheet, still like a ghost. He raised his head from the pillow and stared at me. An unhinged hunger flared as he took in my bare skin. I rounded the bottom of the bed, finding those floorboards that creaked and moaned.

  Panic rode a knife’s edge in his voice. “X… What are you doing?”

  Cool sheets on his mattress skimmed my knees. “Don’t talk. Don’t say anything.”

  I swept my hand across the cotton, gathering the edges in my grip and slipped under the blankets.

  He shuddered, shaking the bed as I settled beside him. I could help him. I could save him. I moved closer, finding the heat of his body and moved over him.

  He was so still…so unbelievably still. I closed my eyes and lowered my mouth to his. Hard lips softened, barely moving. A quake raced until his mouth moved, opening, closing, taking mine…taking more. I shoved against the mattress, pressing my breasts against his arms, his chest.

  Warmth lingered, sliding down my skin with the flare of desire, until he broke away. “No. Don’t… Stop, X.”

  His mouth was mine. His body mine. I saved him. I saved him so he belonged to me. This flesh, this warmth—I ran my fingers over his chest, finding nipples that puckered under my touch—was mine.

  My breath bounced off his skin, blowing hot against my lips. The lick of fire traveled, reaching between my thighs with unseen hands. His chest dipped and then stilled, a breath caught and held me prisoner. His body trembled as I traced purple bruises that darkened his ribs. My fingers slipped down his side, skirting hard muscles.

  “Stop.” Alpha jerked his head from the pillow. Dark eyes glinted like a starless sky. I now knew where the night was, where it hid in those daylight hours…

  His fingers closed around my wrist, tightening…but not enough. I reached for him, testing his strength. His top lip curled as he snarled. “I said, stop it.”

  I stilled, muscles trembled. Heart beating…a cruel beat…a lonely beat.

  His body trembled against me, hard and yet soft. The image wavered. The sheen just a lie, just a… I turned my head and blinked. Slick tears slid down my cheeks.

  His voice was like gravel against my nerves. “This…isn’t right.”

  Isn’t right. I stared at his dresser. Isn’t right…

  His knee shifted. Hot skin moved against my bare thigh. I was naked…but still it wasn’t enough…never enough.

  “This isn’t what you need…it isn’t what I want to give you.”

  My chest tightened, squeezing all the hate and the hurt into my throat.

  “It’s isn’t that I…that I… Jesus. I’d take a bullet for you. I’d be anything that you need. I want—fuck, I want you. I want you like I want to fucking breathe…like I want revenge. I want you so bad I can taste you.” His breath hitched. His tongue snaked out, skirting his lip. Carnal hunger raged in his eyes. “But you need to heal. You need for someone to treat you like a real man should.”

  His calloused fingers were gentle, skimming my cheek to grab my jaw. The pressure was careful, forcing me to turn to him.

  My tears gravitated to his fingers. I licked my lips and tasted salt.

  He moved against me, angling his hips away, as though he didn’t want me to feel his body as he murmured. “And I am that man, X. So help me God, I am that man. I’m going to give you everything you want…in time. For now, I’m going to feed you. I’m going to care for you.”

  His grip slipped on my chin, bare knuckles skimmed my cheek. His deep voice was raw and husky. “I’m going to wipe away your tears, and I’m going to hold you…right after I…right after you give me just a second here.”

  He never looked away, only stared at his fingers sliding amongst slick tears. I wasn’t enough for him…not nearly enough. He wanted more than this shell of a person could give. The illusion hovered just out of reach—the illusion of happiness, of beauty, of being whole.

  “Hey, look at me.”

  His fingers never stopped cresting my cheek, my temple. Blunt nails brushed my shorn hair.

  “You are enough. You’re more than enough, for yourself, for me…if that’s what you’re worried about. And this isn’t because you saved my damn life. This is because you are special…”

  He stilled—panic flared in his gaze, like a dying star. He inched closer, taking his time until I tasted his breath.

  I closed my eyes. His lips skimmed mine. The kiss so chaste, burning with desire…with need. My heart slammed against my ribs, desperate for flight.

  The kiss came again. He was soft, tasting my lips, and then taking my mouth. A slow stroke of his tongue made something deep inside me shiver. He took no more and pulled away. But gave me everything. A quake resonated, like the beat of my grandfather’s drum—and that echo reached into the deepest parts of me—where that young girl waited, standing there, shivering in the dark.

  “You’re more than enough, X. More than enough for any man… And I’m the lucky sonofabitch that gets to hold you, gets to love you. God, you’re so beautiful.” He cupped my ear with his hand and slid his thumb down my cheek. “So, goddamn beautiful. Don’t you move now.”

  His hand slid from its hold. He shifted his body, slid
ing along the sheet and out of the bed. He did his best to cover his body, but as big as his hands were—they were useless.

  That quake inside me deepened as I stared at his hard body. The thick muscles of his waist dipped to his hips. Corded tendons tightened as he bent and snatched a pair of shorts from the floor, stepping into one leg and then the other.

  But it was his cock that filled my gaze. Thick and red, shooting straight out from between a nest of dark hair. I wanted to run my fingers over the smooth skin. I wanted to trace the vein that ran the length. I wanted to taste his body, as he had tasted my lips. Fire burned deep, inviting, turning the dark desperation of survival into something else.

  Hate still waited, staring out of my eyes to the man in front of me.

  Hate wanted him as much as I did.

  But Hate wanted to hurt. She wanted to use.

  She wanted to make them pay…

  “Okay, that’s better,” he mumbled and adjusted the front of his shorts before sitting on the mattress—only this time on top of the sheets.

  Hate stared at him. Alpha wasn’t the one who hurt us. He was the one who saved us. He was the one who saved me.

  No, he’s mine. You won’t hurt him. I won’t let you.

  Hate blinked and turned those soulless eyes to me.

  “You okay?” The bed dipped and shook with his weight as Alpha slid closer, curling around my body once more.

  I flinched and yanked my gaze to him. He slid one hand under the pillow, drawing me into his arms. Heat radiated from his skin, turning me soft and pliable.

  I slid my arm across his stomach. Alpha is mine. I won’t let you take him from me.

  Alpha turned his head, giving me a tiny smile. “Better?”

  Hate snarled… We’ll see, won’t we?

  The warning hardened my stomach, making me shake.

  “You cold?” His arms tightened, drawing me hard against him. “How’s that? Better?”

  I closed my eyes and nodded as Alpha settled down. But there was no better. Not after what I’d done. Blood stained my hands…and the river had only just started.

  Diamond was coming. He’d kill, he’d take…and he’d leave me alive to watch.

  I wouldn’t live…couldn’t live.

  But it wouldn’t be Alpha’s blood that would be spilled. My fingers curled and dug into his flesh as his breaths evened out, drawing deeper until soft snores echoed.

  I wouldn’t allow that to happen. Not now…not ever.

  I gripped the sheets and slid my foot from the bed.

  Hate was alive and she was well…and she was coming.

  10

  Alpha

  I opened my eyes and blinked at the dark. My head throbbed like a bitch, muscles spasmed along my neck driving a fucking shard into my brain. I clenched my hand, and dragged it from under the pillow next to me.

  X…

  My hand stilled. The bed was no longer warm. Her body no longer curled into mine. I dragged my fingers along the cool sheet. She was gone. The damn ache in my chest throbbed harder than my head. I shifted on top of the sheets, rolling to the center of the bed and buried my face into the pillow.

  The faint scent of her body lingered. She smelled like summer rain and death so rich and heady it made my damn jaw ache.

  A memory came to life. Her bare skin, thin legs, perfect tiny breasts. Jesus. I closed my eyes as my pulse picked up pace. I must be a fucking fool to turn her away. A stupid fucking fool. She was right there…right there in my damn bed, naked, wanting me with those wide brown eyes.

  I’d give almost anything to have kissed her, to have buried myself inside her heart. I’d give almost anything…anything but pain and cruelty, and that’s what I’d give her. She didn’t need me to fuck her—she needed me to love her.

  She needed me to do the right goddamn thing.

  I straddled that edge like a damn razor—and Jesus it cut. It cut so deep there wasn’t a fucking surgeon alive that could mend me. I hurt her by turning her away…I hurt her and now she was gone.

  A hot knife plunged deep in the back of my skull as I moved. I slid a foot from the bed, and followed with the other. The damn room swayed. I reached for my scalp; thick, crusted blood came away on the tips of my fingers.

  Shit. I’d been hit harder than I thought. The creak of a floorboard dragged my head toward the door. Was she pacing? Was she leaving?

  I planted my feet and rose. Bright sparks cleaved my skull and danced in my eyes. My bare feet skimmed the wooden floor. I reach out in the dark, searching for the door as reflex made me step around the bottom of the bed.

  The metal was cold to the touch. I gripped the handle and turned. Footsteps echoed out in the front of the room. I licked my lips, my voice raw and harsh in the dark. “X. I’m sorry.”

  The creak died. There was nothing but silence. I took a step, leaving the doorway behind. “You don’t have to lie beside me, if you don’t want. Let me drag in the chair and I’ll sleep beside you in your room. Just don’t…”

  Don’t leave me…please don’t leave me.

  A chill seeped into the air, and it wasn’t the winter’s bite. It was a growing feeling of helplessness, or fear of rejection and something else…something that made the hair on my arms stand on end, and a voice inside my head whisper…

  Something’s not right.

  My palm ached. I squinted into the darkness, but my mind was tracing the steps back to the bloodied jeans on the ground and my holster draped across the back of the chair. “X, is that you?”

  A creak echoed to my right. The wooden board protesting under the weight. A weight too heavy for X. She barely made a sound. Sparks danced, leaving me with blinding patches as I flexed my hands and stepped closer. “Who’s there?”

  The faint white light filtered in through the window from a street light. At the edge of the glow there was a shift, something big hunkered in the shadows. I blinked and tried to focus. X’s warning ripped through my mind.

  “I’m coming for you. I’m coming for all of you.”

  But it was the big bastard’s answer that nailed me to the spot. “Not if I don’t come for you first.”

  I jerked my head toward X’s room. There was no sound, nothing but a damn void. I slid my foot toward her door, and moved. The handle bounced. My heartbeat thundered. She’d be awake by now. She would’ve heard me call for her and she’d be awake.

  I bore down and then shoved. The door swung wide revealing an unmade bed. Shadows at the end of the bed called me. I took a step inside. “X?”

  There was nothing but the gnawing ache of loneliness. The heavy sound of the breath made me turn. “What have you done with her?”

  The dark blur moved, stepping out into the room. And for a moment I was stunned, for a second I had nothing to say. “You sonofabitch!”

  His hair shone silver, hunched shoulders weighed down by betrayal. Pain sliced my head, distorting the image of my uncle. “You set me up. You fucking set me up!”

  He shook his head and stepped closer. “Darrion.”

  I stumbled, tripped by some fucking blare of white inside my head. “Don’t! Don’t you fucking dare!”

  He lifted his hand, his face still shrouded by the night. Betrayed by my own family. My voice turned thick…he was the only father I had. The only one I needed. Tears blurred the shadows. This was for Stitch. This was all for Stitch. “How could you? How could you make me stand there and lose a brother, when you knew what was happening?”

  I wouldn’t cry…I wouldn’t fucking cry. Agony roared, buckling my knees. I stumbled for the doorframe and clung tight. Heavy boots thudded against the floor, but it wasn’t toward me…it was away.

  The click of a bolt was a crack in the night. I stared at the back of his head as he yanked open the door and stepped out.

  “No you don’t…you don’t get to walk out on me!”

  Fire lashed my throat. I shoved off the wall and stumbled after him. The frigid night air burned as it hit my lungs. I was fille
d with fire. I was driven by rage. The dark shape moved faster along the concrete path to the small gate, and then he was gone, crossing the street toward the blur of an old pickup.

  Where was the Suburban?

  My steps were a blur. I stumbled, hit a wall, and shoved my way back inside. The keys were on the hook in the kitchen. Outside, the deep throb of an old engine roared. I snatched my keys off the hook and lunged for the door.

  My bare feet slapped the floor to find that broken part inside my head, rattling my thoughts, shaking loose my demons. He’d not get away—not that fucking easy. The path was barely a thought. I stabbed the button and yanked open the driver’s door as the low thunk of a gearbox echoed. I slid inside the Jeep and stabbed the ignition with the key. The car came to life, purring like a damn cat. I shoved it into reverse. White sparks danced in my eyes as I stared into the mirror and punched the accelerator.

  He had her…the backstabbing sonofabitch had X. She wouldn't leave…she wouldn’t leave me. I swung the wheel, hit the gears, and powered through into third by the time I turned the corner.

  Crimson taillights glowed in the dark, and grew fainter with every damn second. I bore down on the accelerator and the car picked up pace. Red bounced off the old green paintwork of the old Chevy.

  I’d never seen the car before.

  But there was a lot I’d not seen, wasn’t there? Like treason…like fucking treason.

  I gripped the wheel and rode his ass all the way to the highway. I was already veering left, ready to drive the bastard off the road when he turned right instead.

  “What the fuck?”

  I dug my thumb into the hollow of my temple as the pickup in front raced ahead. I eased off, giving him enough rope to hang himself and turned toward the hills of Sunrise Valley.

  These woods had once been filled with dying shifters, until we built somewhere for them to thrive. Now all that was left were overgrown shrubs and thriving pine trees. Houses slipped away behind me as the Jeep started the incline. I followed the pickup, rounding bend after bend as we zigzagged away across the mountain until the brake lights flared and he turned off the main road.