Vieri's Convenient Vows (Harlequin Presents)
Page 16
Harper let him hold her, her body moulding against his, wonderfully soft and responsive to his embrace. But then the moment passed and she stiffened, moving against him. ‘You are pleased?’ She muffled the words against his coat, then pushed herself away to look up into his face.
‘Si, certo, of course.’ But at the sight of her anxious face Vieri’s fears crept in again. ‘What exactly did the doctor say?’
‘She said that I should rest and if the spasms stop and I don’t get any more then everything should be okay.’ She sniffed, brushing away the tears with the back of her hand. ‘She has booked me in for a scan in a couple of days.’
‘And have they stopped, the pains?’
Harper nodded, but she had to bite down on her lip before she could meet his eyes. ‘I haven’t had any for several hours now.’
‘So that it good, si?’ Relief flooded his voice.
‘Yes, it’s good.’ She gave him a watery smile. Of course it was good; it was more than good. But having Vieri here, standing in her bedroom looking ridiculously out of place in his dark coat, seeming even taller than usual beneath the low ceiling, had brought another pain that was nothing to do with her pregnancy. She loved him so much. Seeing him again, after several weeks’ absence, only made her realise it more.
‘You should get back into bed.’ Suddenly Vieri was swooping her up into his arms and carrying her over to the bed, where he pulled back the duvet and settled her underneath. ‘There.’ He tenderly brushed the hair back from her forehead. ‘You must rest.’
Fat chance of that. As Harper gazed at him, every nerve ending in her body tingled with awareness, every cell longed for him, yearned for him. But she knew she had to be strong, be sensible.
Vieri’s extreme reaction to the pregnancy had shocked her. His anger when he had thought she’d had a termination was perhaps understandable, although she suspected there were many men who would have greeted that news with relief. But Vieri wasn’t like other men. He was proud and he was strong and just the sight of him filled her heart to overflowing. But he wasn’t hers. And even though now he knew the truth his attitude had dramatically changed and he appeared to be so happy about the baby, thrilled even, that didn’t mean that anything had changed. In terms of what they were going to do now, how they would raise the child, how she would cope with the agony of loving a man who didn’t love her back, she had no idea.
One step at a time, she decided, arranging the duvet around her. Somehow they would make it work. They had to.
‘So what are you actually doing here, Vieri?’ She delved down into her shallow reserves of reason to try and sound normal. ‘You didn’t think to tell me you were coming?’
‘It was a spur-of-the-moment thing.’ Vieri shrugged off his coat and pulled up a chair, positioning it by the bed.
‘Can I ask why?’
‘I wanted to see you.’ He made it sound like the most natural thing in the world, especially when he took hold of her hand that lay outside the covers and laced his fingers through hers. ‘Though it was never my intention to come storming in like a wild beast. I’m so sorry.’
‘That’s okay. You were upset.’
‘No, it’s not okay. It was unforgivable. Especially when you are supposed to be getting peace and rest.’
‘There’s no harm done.’ She gave him a reassuring smile.
‘Thankfully not.’ He gave her a solemn stare. ‘But I owe you an explanation.’
‘No, really, there’s no need...’
Raising a finger, he pressed it against her lips to silence her.
‘Yes, Harper, there is. There is something I need to tell you.’ He hesitated and Harper could see the internal struggle playing across his face, as if he was waging war with himself. ‘Many years ago I fathered another child.’ He watched her intently, searching for her reaction. ‘I was eighteen. I thought she was the love of my life, but it turned out I was wrong.’
‘Oh, Vieri.’ Harper gripped his hand more tightly.
‘She had an abortion without even telling me she was pregnant. I only found out by chance afterwards.’
‘I’m so sorry.’ Suddenly realisation dawned. ‘And you thought I’d done the same thing?’
Vieri shrugged his apology. ‘Stupid, I know. I just jumped to the wrong conclusion. Forgive me, Harper.’
‘There’s nothing to forgive. This girl obviously hurt you very much.’
‘That’s just it—she wasn’t a girl. She was a woman.’ He hesitated again, before dragging in a deep breath. ‘It was Donatella Sorrentino.’
Donatella Sorrentino. Harper felt the pain of her name spear through her. She should have known. The woman whose dark presence had always been swirling around in the background. Who Harper had long suspected meant more to Vieri than he had ever admitted. Now she knew the truth.
She pulled her hand away from his clasp.
‘And you still love her?’ Her voice sounded very small.
‘No!’ Vieri’s reply was immediate, vehement. Too vehement. ‘Whatever makes you think that?’
Harper looked down at the bedclothes, unable to meet his gaze, frightened of what she might see there.
‘Because I saw the way you reacted when I told you she had chosen my dress for the ball. And again at Castello di Trevente after Alfonso died. Both times you behaved like a man possessed...’ she picked at the duvet cover ‘...or a man in love.’
‘No!’ Vieri could only repeat the word in astonishment. He gazed at Harper’s bent head, at the soft auburn curls falling to cover her face. How could she have got this so wrong? How could she have misunderstood him so completely? But then it was hardly surprising when he thought of the way he had treated her. All the harassment and bullying, using her for his own gain, or, even worse, his own satisfaction. Forcing her to marry him and then banishing her from the castello before turning up here hollering like a raving lunatic. It was no wonder Harper jumped to wrong conclusions, thought so badly of him, had no real measure of who he was. Who could blame her?
Shame coursed through him, hot and strong. He had to try and put things right. It was time to come out of the murky shadows and be honest with Harper, show her the man he really was. Except he was no longer sure who that man was.
A few months ago it would have been easy. Hugely successful billionaire businessman with a formidable reputation for working hard and for enjoying the fruits of his success. A man at the top of his game, always in control, a man who had taken on the world and won. Invincible, ruthless, heartless.
But now...now as Harper slowly raised her head to look at him again and he caught sight of her beautiful face, he realised that none of that material success mattered. None of it actually meant anything. His whole life had been a hollow shell...until now.
Getting to his feet, he moved over to the window, trying to order his thoughts, make some sense of this astonishing shift in his values. But first things first—he had to put Harper right about Donatella. Drawing in a breath, he turned to face her again. ‘I promise you, Harper, any love I may have felt for Donatella died a very long time ago. Now all I feel is anger. That’s what you have witnessed.’
‘But so much anger?’ She refused to let go. ‘And after all these years? Surely time should have allowed you to put it behind you, move on.’
She was right, of course. He had carried this hatred for Donatella for far too long. So long that it had become part of who he was, almost as if letting go of it would be losing a chunk of himself. It had become his own personal vendetta. And deep down he knew why. Not just because Donatella had betrayed the Calleroni family, the callous way she had as good as signed her own father’s death warrant and broken Alfonso’s heart. Not the vile way she had groomed him on the orders of the Sorrentino family, used him and then dumped him. Not even the actual act of the abortion. His problem was more basic than that, more fundamental. He had never analysed the root cause before—he had never needed to. But suddenly he wanted Harper to understand.
M
oving towards the end of the bed, he gripped the iron railing, the metal cold against his hot hands.
‘I know how important family is to you, Harper. I have seen the way you care for your loved ones.’ He started slowly, trying to keep his voice level, neutral, aiming for facts rather than emotion. ‘And despite the impression I may have given you, I really admire you for that.’
Harper stared at him, waiting.
‘But I grew up without a family. Apart from Alfonso, I had no one to show me any love, or to love in return.’
‘That’s so sad.’ Her soft, gentle voice immediately pulled at the threads of his composure. Vieri shrugged.
‘I never really knew any different. But when Donatello had that abortion, she terminated my only known blood relative. That was why my reaction was so extreme.’ He swallowed hard. ‘With that one, selfish act, she denied me the possibility of a family of my own. Someone to care for, for the first time.’
‘Oh, Vieri.’ Pulling back the covers, Harper scrambled to the end of the bed, kneeling before him and placing her hands over his clasped fists.
‘And I believe that is the reason I have found it so hard to let it go.’ He pushed on to the end, determined to be honest with himself—with her.
‘Of course. I understand completely.’ Reaching up, Harper touched his cheek with the back of her hand, a gesture so gentle, so simple, but so right. Vieri felt his heart melt. ‘And all those emotions were stirred up again when you thought I had done the same thing.’
‘No.’ For the first time Vieri realised that wasn’t true. He reached for her hand. ‘No, this is different. The reason I reacted so violently when I thought you had had an abortion is because...’ he hesitated, discovering the truth as he spoke the words ‘...because I want this baby. So very much.’
‘I see.’ Harper withdrew her hand and sat back on her heels, a wariness creeping into her voice.
‘No, you don’t.’ He moved to the side of the bed. ‘This has nothing to do with my childhood or what Donatella did or the family I have never had. It is simply because this baby is ours, Harper, yours and mine. That’s what makes it so special.’
‘Well, thank you for sharing that with me.’ She turned her head away, as if unwilling or unable to process his words.
‘It is I who should be thanking you.’ Suddenly Vieri realised how true that was. Catching hold of her chin, he turned her to face him again, searching deep into her eyes. Beneath the vulnerability he could see such tenderness, such compassion that something shifted inside him. Like a beam of light shining through the gloom of his past existence, he realised that the anger that had been with him so long had lifted, gone, miraculously evaporated. Donatella meant nothing to him any more. And Harper everything.
But still he hesitated, still he tried to hold back the surge of emotions that was straining to break free. He had to think about Harper now, what was best for her. The cruel way he had treated her in the past tormented him, but he had always been so sure it had been for her own good. To protect her from the man he was—from his blackened heart. A heart that had been so badly damaged all those years ago that it had petrified inside him, like a chunk of fossilised wood. But now as he looked into those remarkable autumn-coloured eyes he realised he had been wrong all along. His heart hadn’t been irretrievably damaged after all. He had just never come across anyone to breathe life into it. Until now.
Outside the rain was coming down heavily, the wind lashing it against the small window, darkening the room. Taking hold of Harper’s hands, Vieri solemnly held them before him.
‘I have so much to thank you for, Harper.’ He spoke quietly, feeling his way, his voice competing with the sound of the rain. ‘You are the most remarkable, beautiful, caring woman I have ever met. But it is time for someone to take care of you. I am that person. From now on I am going to look after you, you and the baby. I promise you, you will want for nothing.’
Harper held herself very still. She could see the sincerity in his eyes, feel it in his voice, almost believe that, for once, she was all that mattered. Almost. She gave her head a small shake. ‘You don’t need to do that.’
‘Oh, but I do, cara. More than you could possibly know.’ He stroked the palms of her hands with his thumbs. ‘From now on you and our unborn child are all that I care about. Your happiness is everything to me.’
‘Vieri... I...’ Harper pulled away her hands and, slipping off the bed, came and stood before him. Vieri could see her bottom lip staring to quiver, hear the threat of tears in her voice.
‘Please, Harper,’ he quickly tried to intercept. ‘Let me do this. I know that you have every right to hate me after the way I have treated you but let me try and make it up to you.’
‘That’s just it, Vieri. I don’t hate you.’ Now the tears were starting to fall, silently rolling down her cheek. ‘I could never hate you. I almost wish I did.’
‘But why?’ He frowned down at her anguished face, uncomprehending.
‘Because to hate you would be much easier.’ She took in a short, brave breath. ‘Loving you is the hard thing.’
There, she had said it. Like stepping off a cliff, Harper felt herself go into freefall, the world spinning around her. By opening up to her, Vieri had released her to say the thing that had been haunting her for so long. And to her surprise she felt a profound sense of release. A calm sense of ‘what will be, will be’. Que sera sera.
‘What are you saying, cara?’ Vieri leant in, searching her eyes for answers.
‘I’m saying that I love you, Vieri. With all my heart.’
With tears still blocking her throat, she waited as Vieri took in this information, refusing to let herself try and analyse the fleeting expressions of shock and surprise that were flitting across the face that she loved so much. Finally, silently, he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into a tight embrace.
‘But why do you cry, cara?’ He breathed into the tangle of her hair.
‘Because I never meant for this to happen.’ Buried against his shoulder, Harper felt the torrent of words begin to tumble from her mouth. ‘And I know you don’t feel the same way and that’s fine because we will still be good parents and raise our child together and I don’t expect anything from you, romantically I mean, because I know you couldn’t give that and...’
‘Harper!’
‘...and I would certainly hate you to think that you had to stay with me out of some sort of pity. That would be awful and totally unacceptable, of course.’
‘Harper, stop!’ Pulling away, he gazed into her face. ‘Let me speak. I need to tell you something. I need to make you see what is here, in my heart.’ He spread his hand across his chest. ‘You mean everything to me, Harper, everything. With or without the baby, you are the centre of my world. My world would have no meaning without you in it.’
A delirious sensation flooded through her, weakening her bones, stealing all words. But Vieri hadn’t finished yet.
Brushing a strand of hair away from her heated face, he held her gaze with an intensity that permeated her very soul. ‘Because I love you, Harper. With my whole being. With everything I have to give.’
‘You do?’ Her eyes were bright with shock.
‘I do. And I am only sorry that it has taken me this long to realise.’ Clasping her hands, he poured out his confession, determined that she should see it, feel it. ‘Now I know the truth I realise it has been there all along. I love you, Harper, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. That’s if you will have me, of course.’
‘Oh, Vieri!’ With a certainty that set her heart alight, she realised it was true. He really did love her. Every bit as much as she loved him.
His lips came down on hers, softly at first, but immediately deepening as the ecstasy took hold, the heat of their love spreading between them until they melded together as one. Until they were kissing, not just with their mouths but with their breath and their blood, their hearts and their souls. All that they were.
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��Can I take that as a yes?’ Pausing for a second for them to catch their breath, Vieri pulled back to gaze down at her.
‘Yes, Vieri.’ She tipped her chin, her eyes shining. ‘You can.’
‘Mille grazie, mio amore. I can’t tell you what that means to me.’ He brushed her lips again. ‘I’m just wondering...’ He looked over her shoulder. ‘D’you think there is room in that bed for two?’
With a wide smile, Harper took his hand. ‘Don’t you mean three?’
‘I do, don’t I?’ Vieri stared at her, shaking his head in amazement. ‘You and the baby—I have to be the luckiest man alive.’
Outside the window the rain had stopped and a brilliant rainbow arced across the sky. Whether it was in agreement or celebration or merely a meteorological coincidence didn’t really matter. Snuggled up in bed, lost in the wonder of their joy and very, very much in love, Vieri and Harper knew that, no matter what, their happiness would last for ever.
EPILOGUE
‘WE ARE HERE, mio figlio.’ Bringing the car gently to a halt outside the castello, Vieri turned to look at his precious cargo. His wife, Harper, and beside her, asleep in his car seat, his newborn son. ‘Welcome to Castello di Trevente.’ Harper smiled back at him and Vieri’s heart swelled with tenderness and love.
Being there as his wife gave birth to their child had been the most exhilarating, terrifying, astonishing experience of his life. The labour had been long and seeing Harper in pain hard to endure and at times his concern for her had almost got the better of him. Only Harper’s calm insistence that she was in control had stopped him from roaring down the corridors to demand somebody did something, or summonsing every medic in the land to come to her aid if necessary.
But in the end his beautiful, brave Harper had done it all on her own, with just the help of the midwife, who had made it clear she had no time for Vieri’s histrionics. Seeing his son take his first lungful of air, then lovingly held against Harper’s chest, had all but undone him, the whole miracle of life almost too much to take in. And when the baby had been wrapped in a towel and handed to him, when he had gazed into his son’s deep blue eyes for the first time, the full swell of emotion had taken over. And Vieri had done nothing to try to hide it.