Panties for Sale

by York, Mattie

  Anyways, Mr. Carl Roberts. CEO of Roberts Electronics. Yes. The Roberts Electronics that just made a bid to take over the NORTEL offices. That’s some serious cash. And his wife. Gorgeous! And she’s not old either. Not like him. I’d say mid 40s. Stunning. French looking though, I think. Like that actress, I can’t think of her name, in the Chocolate movie with Johnny Depp.

  God. Chocolate. I would kill for that chocolate shop right now. A steamy vat of melted chocolate. I haven’t had chocolate in a week. Can you believe it? I had to stop. Lindt chocolate balls should not be eaten like breath mints. But they are so damn good. One week. That’s got to count for something? Maybe tomorrow I can reward myself. What if I had hot chocolate at night? That would be ok. No. I’d rather have my wine. Yes, much better. Although. Could I combine that? Hot chocolate with mint liqueur. Oh Angela, you’re a sly one. That will work. Yes. I’ll go shopping tomorrow.

  OK. Back to Chieko. Not sure about her. I mean she killed it with John Thackery. He loved her. What the hell is up with that man? Thinks he’s James Bond with his stupid little tunnels in his house. He has no idea that we are all laughing at him. Who orders a call girl when your wife is at church, just so you can pretend you are bat man emerging from some stupid tunnel you built in your house and just JUST getting the girl to give you a blow job. And then fall asleep? Does he think it’s not cheating if it’s just a blow? I have never EVER had a girl do anything else for that man. And it’s always the same white room. I wonder. … I wonder if he video tapes it. You know, I never thought of that before. He probably does. That’s why he does it. Bloody perv. If he wasn’t so regular and pays so damn well. I mean he doesn’t hurt any of the girls and yeah, it’s weird but it’s not dangerous. I can’t really tell him to fuck off for being weird, can I?

  What am I going to do with Alex? No one has booked her. A few calls of interest, but they were slimy clients. Unknowns. I don’t want to do that to Alex, not for the first one. I don’t know. I know Chieko’s desperate for the money. But she’s a good worker. I just trust her, you know. Ahmed likes her. She’s quiet, he said, but he said she’s a good one. He knows. He been driving my girls for years. He’s got like a sixth sense. He can predict the ones that stay and the ones that don’t last. He said she’s determined. He said he could tell by watching her walk. I know she’ll put on her face and do the job. And the men adore her. Alex wouldn’t have been able to deal with those guys. Could you imagine her with Carl Roberts? With his fat old ass and dick that doesn’t work? Or Thaackery? Him popping out of his bloody tunnel? Yeah, she’d say something smart ass, I know she would. Damn it. I need a semi-normal guy to start her off with, or she won’t last.

  Can you believe that Chieko asked me why the men pay so much for the room? Why they just don’t rent them by hour. What kind of sleazeball place does she think I’m sending her to? By the hour. Motel. Bloody Ghetto. No. Thank you madam. And then she was all upset about me blurring her face on the websites. You would think she would be grateful. I’m doing her a favour so her whole damn family in Japan doesn’t see her online.

  At first I didn’t think she understood me. She had all these poses. Really. It was hysterical. She kept trying to flirt with the camera. Lower her head and flutter her eyelashes. To be honest, I thought she was trying to seduce me. I had to tell her about Tanya. Sure, honey, I can show your face. And then someone can stalk you. Bloody Tanya and her ring. And what kind of boyfriend did she have? I ask you? What the hell is he doing online searching through the VIP pictures on my website? To get into those pictures, you have to be a client. Yes. That would be someone who has already paid for our services. Um. So what is he up to?

  Men! Men! Men!

  I sure love them, but god damned I hate the lot of them. Jesus alone knows why I got married again. Especially to this stupid fucker. John, what the hell are you doing? Not home yet. It’s past 11:00. Work. Right. He’s at work. Bullshit. He’s out with his secretary again. I know it. So what? It’s my fault. I’m frigid. Yeah, frigid is right. I don’t want to fuck his sorry ass. I’m sick of it. Fucking men. They got to rename that. Servicing men. Ain’t nothing going on for me. I’m so tired of pleasing everyone. When is it time for me?

  Luann says that my chakras are out of line. Whatever that bloody means. God damned chakras. Where do people come up with this shit these days? I’ll tell you what’s out of line. My bloody satisfaction. I can’t get none! When do I get to be satisfied? When do I get to lie back and have someone please me? Mick Jagger. Now he could satisfy.. with those big lips of his. Damn. Angela calm yourself.

  Son of a bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Where is he? Like I don’t know. PRICK!!!!!

  She’s nice enough. Luann Black Feather. What kind of a name is that? Black Feather. Feather is right. Feather brain. But, she was right. About my stress. I was too stressed out. And today, she gave me the most marvelous tea. What did she call it? Ganja tea. It relaxed me right away. I have to learn how to make that stuff. She said it’s important for me to relax myself. To sit alone with my thoughts. Just stare out of the window if I want to. Stop and sit quietly for a few minutes every day. That’s what she said. Well, I am. I’m writing in this journal. Actually, I’m writing a lot. Oh, and I’m starting this goddamned gratitude list. Every day. I have to sit and write down 10 things I’m grateful for. Ha! OK. I’m grateful for…..

  Where is that damned prick of a husband? Why won’t he answer his phone? No, really. I don’t have to think about him. I am only going to fill my head with good things.

  Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for my two darling boys. Who I adore. I’m going to raise to be real boys. Real nice boys. Not like their prick father. But kind and strong. And open the door for women. And listen.

  10

  The barista winked at Alex as he handed her two grande chai lattes with soy milk. She wrapped them in cardboard sleeves and then carried them to the back of the busy Starbucks café where Chieko was waiting. Alex would have preferred to lounge out in the big velvet chairs in front of the fireplace, but the back table was probably much better for their conversation.

  “Ohma! It’s hot!” Chieko cried, almost dropping the large paper cup on the table.

  “Yes,” laughed Alex. “I’m sorry. I should have warned you. You usually can’t drink it for a few minutes. They make it really hot here, so it lasts a long time.” Alex held her cup just under her nose and closed her eyes and let the strong spicy aroma wash over her. Warm fires, Christmas and freshly baked gingerbread cookies all rolled into a Starbucks cup. When she finally opened her eyes, Chieko was eyeing her strangely. “You try,” Alex smiled, “It smells so good.”

  Chieko lifted the cup suspiciously up to her nose. “In Japan, we make tea, um, cold, not so hot. How do I say?”

  “Warm?”

  “Ah, yes, warm, and not so giant.”

  “Yes,” Alex rolled her eyes. Of course, Chieko would think everything in Canada was too big. She was so tiny. She was one of those girls that GAP made size 0 for. Size Zero! Alex hated seeing that size on the rack. Doesn’t that mean you don’t exist? That you are so skinny if you turn sideways, you disappear?

  God, but Chieko must be intoxicating to men. She must make them feel so big and strong. They must get that primal warrior feeling like they are protecting this tiny delicate flower of a girl. Alex suddenly wished she hadn’t eaten those Macdonald’s fries on the drive over. She felt like her belt buckle was straining against her stomach. She readjusted her belt and tried to sit up straighter, but it didn’t help. She still felt like a giant. Crossing her arms in front of her, slouched down in her chair.

  The girls sipped their lattes in silence

  Looking back at Chieko, Alex remembered she had promised Angela that she would be nice. “This business is tough,” Angela had said, “everyone needs a support system. And you two are starting at the same time. It will be good for you to share your experiences. Chieko might be your savior some time, you know?
I don’t know what I would have done without Dora. Think about it. Who else can you talk to about this stuff? Your friends? Your family? They won’t understand. No, actually it’s better if they don’t know at all. Trust me on that. No, Chieko and you should be friends. You two can talk about things, share your experiences. Plus I really think she is going to need help here.”

  “How long have you been in Canada?”

  Chieko looked up, “I, ah, come to Canada for, rokkagetu, ah, six months.”

  “You mean six months ago?”

  “Hai, yes. Six months ago,”

  “Did you come with your family?”

  “Nei, no.”

  “Oh. Are you here with friends?” Chieko shook her head. “You are here alone?” Alex asked.

  “Hai, yes.” Chieko nodded.

  “With no one to help you?”

  “Yes,” Chieko looked away.

  “Wow that is brave. But what do you do? I mean, why did you come to Canada? Are you a student?”

  Chieko looked up at Alex. “No, I was a student in Japan.”

  “Oh, did you study English in Japan?”

  “Hai. Yes, I did, but I am not so good.”

  “No, no, you are fine,” Alex smiled, surprising herself. Chieko puzzled her. At first, Alex thought she was a total stuck up bitch. Any one that beautiful and tiny had to be nothing less, in Alex’s experience. But Chieko was here all alone and she could barely speak English. What was she doing? Toronto could be pretty harsh at times. Especially to immigrants. Especially if they don’t speak English so well

  Torontonians don’t mean to be offensive, sometimes, they just don’t understand. They still have that ‘we were here first’ mentality. Most Torontonians didn’t grow up with so many different people, from different cultures and religions all around them, crowding them in. It’s not that they mean to be harsh or insensitive, Canadians are usually very open minded accommodating people, but the rapid influx of foreign populations can get hard to deal with, especially when it means crowding the 401 and filling up the city with foreign cultures that seem loud, dirty and at times dangerous.

  It’s not just the Torontonians though. Immigrants come to Toronto with their own preconceived ideas of what life should be like and try to create small epochs of their hometowns here. It creates a rather delicate balancing act.

  “Isn’t it hard for you here,” Alex leaned closer to Chieko, “to understand everything? I mean, do you understand everything? You know, if you need any help, well. I have a car, if you need to go anywhere.” Alex ripped off a piece of paper, “Here, take my cell phone number.”

  “Domo, thank you,” Chieko nodded.

  “Alex lowered her voice, “Escorting can be difficult. You know, don’t you think?”

  Chieko looked at Alex in surprise. “You think so? Mondai ga aru nante sinjirarenai, anata wa kireidashi, jisinka dashi. I mean, but you are so strong.”

  Alex laughed. “Me? No, are you kidding? I’m freaking out. My first appointment is tomorrow. What about yours?”

  “No. Already done. Done 5 already”

  “What? Really?” Alex looked around to make sure no one was listening and then leaned in closer. “How did they go?”

  “Ok. Fine,” Chieko shrugged. “Good.”

  “Weren’t you nervous?”

  “At beginning,” Chieko giggled, “yes. Okyaku san no houga watasiyori kowagatteta to omouyo. Um, I think, my client was more scared. But,” Chieko paused, “no, it is ok. Really, my client, he is nice and very kind.”

  “And that’s it?”

  “Hai, really, don’t worry,” Chieko smiled, “you will be ok. Sonnnani kirei nanoni kincho-surunannte okashi- yo.

  “Huh?” Alex asked

  “Oh,” Chieko giggled, “um, probably, the client, the man, he is more afraid to you.”

  “Yeah right,” Alex laughed. “So, did you have, um, you know, have sex? On your appointment? Or did you have to, you know,” Alex shook her hand suggestively.

  Chieko shook her head, giggling. “Not on first.”

  “You didn’t?”

  “I don’t know if I should say,” Chieko whispered, “but ok.” She looked up at Alex. “My first client, he was very fat and very old. And,” she paused, “kare impo datta, um, not very strong.”

  “What, do you mean?” Alex started but then realized what Chieko was saying. “Are you serious? Really? And he still paid you?”

  Chieko nodded and tried to hide her laughter with her hands.

  11

  A low whistle came from the front seat, as Alex slid into the back seat of the black car, “So, is this your first time?” Ahmed sat up tall as he tilted the rearview mirror to get a better look at Alex.

  “Yes,” Alex nodded.

  “Oh! A virgin! My favorite kind,” Ahmed chuckled to himself.

  Alex leaned back into the well-worn leather seats and watched the familiar houses on her street pass by. She closed her eyes and tried to relax, but damn, what was that smell? Was it outside? Alex wrinkled her nose and looked around the back seat. Was it her own clothes? No, it wasn’t coming from her. She had sprayed RUSH all over before she left. She could still smell the perfume on her sleeve. It wasn’t sweat or cigarettes. It was different. More spicy. Pungent. Oh god, she realized, it’s curry. I hate curry! It had better not seep into my clothes, she worried, covering her nose with her hand. God, she thought, I hope I sprayed enough perfume to last the whole ride across town. The last thing Alex wanted was to show up for her first appointment smelling like cheap Indian takeout.

  As Alex looked up, she caught the driver’s eyes staring at her through the rear view mirror. She quickly looked down. She was so not in the mood for this. First the stink of curry and now this? Alex could not deal with being hit on by her driver right now. She was already a nervous wreck. It had taken her all morning to decide on an outfit and to get herself ready; making sure every square inch of her body was buffed and polished, lotioned and perfumed.

  She was dressed in a black suit with shiny black heels. Under her suit jacket, she wore nothing but a red lace bra which peeked seductively out of the low cut neckline. Her makeup was light and natural, her hair swept up into a loose bun, and only small golden hoops in her ears. She hoped she looked casual but elegant. She had tried to follow Angela’s advice. “Just dress simply.” Angela had said over the phone when she called to confirm the appointment. “Try to look like an everyday person. Someone your client might see and fantasize about on the subway. Well, not that this man takes the subway, but you know what I mean, a naughty secretary. Nothing too obvious though. Understated, that’s the key. But make sure your underwear is sexy. Really sexy. Remember,” Angela had said, “the sexiest part about you is the part he hasn’t seen yet.”

  “Yum,” the driver was licking his lips as he watched her through the mirror. “I would like to be your first time.” Alex pretended she didn’t hear and pulled out her cell phone. “Ahmed,” he said.

  Alex looked up. “Huh?”

  “Ahmed, that’s my name.”

  “Ah, nice to meet you.” She glanced up at him. But this time, Ahmed was looking at her through the mirror with such an open friendly smile; she relented and gave him a smile back. Maybe I’m over reacting she thought. Maybe this guy isn’t a sleaze bag. Maybe he is just trying to be nice. Yeah Alex, she chided herself, not every man wants to sleep with you. Just relax.

  Ahmed, had mocha skin, short slicked black hair, dark almond shaped eyes and a bushy moustache which almost covered his thin red lips. And although he was sitting, Alex could tell he was tall with a strong but slim physique. Actually, he had a nice profile. She had to admit, without the lecherous comments and with the right clothes and a shave, he could be handsome. If only he would stop looking at her through the rearview mirror, his dark eyes eagerly darting back and forth from her face to her chest.

  “Nice to meet you too, Alex,” Ahmed said, emphasizing the ‘x’ at the end of her name, “nervous?”

>   “A bit,” Alex looked out the window.

  “Yeah, I was too.”

  “You? Why?”

  “What do you mean, why?” Ahmed asked, “same as you, that’s why.”

  Alex laughed. “You are an escort?”

  “Yes. Of course,” Ahmed shrugged his shoulders, “and why not? I am good too. So good.” He winked at Alex through the rear view mirror and showed her a row of dazzling white teeth. Rolling her eyes, she watched as the car slowly turned onto University Avenue. “Ok. Seriously,” Ahmed continued, “I am here to Canada from India. Delhi. Have you heard?” Alex nodded absently. “But you know, your country, it is hard for me to find work. No one wants to hire me. I don’t want to get a crummy job, you know, like to work in Macdonald’s. I have a university certificate,” he raised his voice, trying to get Alex’s attention.

  Alex’s head was turned looking out the window. She was listening; she just didn’t want to encourage Ahmed. It wasn’t anything new. It seemed like every taxi driver in the GTA had that story. Same story, different countries. Yes, she thought, I know, it’s hard to come to Canada. Alex sighed. She wanted to just once turn and shout, “If it’s so damned awful, why did you come in the first place?” But she didn’t. She was Canadian.

  “Finally I find Angela,” Ahmed continued, “Angela. She is a good woman. At first I am just driver. But that’s not enough money. I want to make lots of money. So Angela suggests I try to escort. She takes some pictures, and tries me out. Yes, what I am telling you is true. Oh! I impressed her, let me tell you. Of course, we are not so busy as you ladies, and so I am still the driver.” Ahmed stopped the car as the streetlight turned red. He twisted around in his seat and slowly looked Alex up and down. “Mmm, you would be surprised the things I could do for you. For you, I would do it for free; it would be my pleasure.”