Haunting Whispers

by V. K. Powell

She’d never thought of her gift in that context, but it certainly made sense. Maybe Rae understood more than she gave her credit for. Audrey’s insides warmed and for the first time she wanted to tell Rae everything. “I got a note this morning in my newspaper, actually a threat.”

  Rae subtly shifted into cop mode. “Did you bring it?”

  Audrey produced the sheet of paper, and Rae carefully unfolded it, using only her fingernails. “Your instincts were partially right.”

  “How do you mean?”

  “This isn’t a warning to you and a threat to me. Someone’s threatening both of us. I’ll have this checked for prints, but I won’t hold my breath. Any idea who left it?”

  “No, not really.”

  Rae moved closer and took her hands. “Please, Audrey. You can trust me.”

  Audrey didn’t know how to say what she needed to. “It’s not about that.” She paused, organizing her words. “Someone assaulted me a year ago, before I came to work for the mayor. I didn’t report it. I didn’t tell anyone, and I have no idea who did it.”

  Finally someone besides Yasi knew about the attack. She felt as if a third person was giving the account, a reporter broadcasting the latest entry on the police blotter. She watched, waiting for Rae’s reaction, expecting disapproval.

  Rae seemed to be trying to put pieces together. “I’m so sorry. It must’ve been awful to go through that alone.” She stroked the back of Audrey’s hands with her thumbs, but asked no cop-like questions, just the perfect amount of encouragement for her to continue.

  “He cut me…not badly.”

  Rae paled. When she spoke her voice was barely audible. “You never reported it?”

  “No, I left the area. I imagined he was everywhere, and I couldn’t remember.”

  “Do you remember now?” Audrey shook her head. “Amnesia?”

  “I think I’ve purposely blocked it. When images resurface, I push them back down. I’ve done that so long, I probably couldn’t recall if I wanted to…and I don’t.”

  “My God, how we’ve failed you.” Rae’s eyes filled with tears.

  “Who?”

  “All of us—your friends, the police, the system, society. If you didn’t feel comfortable sharing the pain of something so awful then obviously we all failed. No wonder you haven’t been able to open up about this latest incident.”

  Compassion and a strong undercurrent of sadness radiated from Rae. She hadn’t understood until now that Rae would take personal responsibility.

  Audrey placed CB on the floor and hugged Rae. “It’s not your fault. I chose to go it alone, but thank you for caring. It means a lot.”

  Rae slowly pulled away, eyes full of questions. “And your…gift? You never got any information, hits, leads, whatever you call it, about your attacker?”

  Audrey shook her head. “And it’s so frustrating. It’s like a therapist trying to handle her own emotional issues—it’s not as easy as dealing with someone else’s.”

  “When it happened…nothing either? I hate to bring up bad memories. I’m trying to understand how it works.”

  “That’s the strange part. During the assault, I was blindfolded. I tried to focus on him, to get some kind of reading, but it was like staring into a black hole, darkness and—”

  “What?”

  Audrey felt a stun gun had zapped her again. Her system hummed and she reviewed a series of memories like flash cards in a whirlwind. “Oh my God. Oh. My. God.”

  “Audrey, what is it? You look terrified.”

  “All I could read about him was darkness and white noise.” Audrey’s stomach lurched. She thought she might be sick as another recollection slid into place. “The guy at the community center—again, nondescript noise—when it happened and later at the press conference. He was there, I’m certain of it.”

  The surprise was evident on Rae’s face. “Are you saying the same person attacked you both times?”

  Audrey didn’t want to believe in coincidence. The thought that the two events were remotely related, much less committed by the same person, gave her chills. She’d inexplicably pursued her recent attacker more than a normal victim would.

  “Is that why you insisted on finding the stun-gun guy yourself?”

  “These bits are surfacing for the first time. I can’t jump to conclusions. Right now they’re only flashes, maybe of absolutely no use. That’s how this gift works.”

  “Have you encountered anybody like this before, a void-and-white-noise person?”

  “Not that I remember. Obviously I’ve been trying to protect myself and—” She stopped, suddenly aware of what she was about to say…and possibly one of my closest friends.

  Rae pulled back. “And what? Were you protecting someone else?”

  She’d come too far not to trust Rae with everything. “It crossed my mind that it might’ve been someone I knew. But I would’ve sensed that at some point.” She felt good, but also a bit disloyal purging the conflicting thoughts that had plagued her for over a year. It pained her to admit she’d actually considered one of her cirque family as a suspect in the initial attack.

  “How can you be sure if no one ever investigated?”

  “I just know.”

  “You’re that certain of your abilities?”

  Audrey considered her answer carefully. Until recently she’d have bet her life on her instincts. When she met Rae, things changed. She could discern Rae’s moods, but the tremendous physical attraction between them distorted deeper readings. Perhaps the intense emotional response to her attacks also affected her psychic ability. Why hadn’t she picked up anything from the assailant in either case? It was easy to understand how the betrayal of Rae’s partner had shaken her confidence. Audrey hoped she sounded more convincing than she felt. “Yes.”

  “Then I believe you.”

  Rae’s sincerity rushed straight to her heart. “Thank you.” She relaxed against Rae and savored the sweet freedom. This felt right.

  Audrey placed her ear to Rae’s chest and listened to her heart’s steady thump. Rae would be as true and devoted as it was, once she committed to something or someone. Audrey slid her hand up Rae’s arm, and her heartbeat quickened.

  She wanted to share one more truth with Rae before she lost her nerve. It was vital if they were to move forward. “I’ve only been with one woman in my life. Actually a girl, right after college. We had no idea what we were doing.”

  Their nervousness had prohibited a real connection. She’d been amazed when they actually kissed, which happened only twice. Audrey had craved more since then but hadn’t met anyone who attracted her strongly enough. For her, intimacy was all or nothing. She sensed the same need in Rae.

  Rae’s arms tightened around her and her voice held a hint of a smile. “And you’re telling me this because?”

  Audrey tilted her head and looked into Rae’s sexy eyes. She remembered their first kiss and tried not to look at her lips. “Because I’d like to be with you, and I’m terrified. I’ve never felt this way before.”

  “You mean terrified?”

  “No. I mean yes, and also excited, physically turned on to the point of distraction. It’s new to me. When I’m around you, my psychic compass goes haywire and my hormones are all over the place.”

  “Don’t worry. I’ll take care of you.”

  Audrey believed Rae and for the first time in her life felt physically safe and totally defenseless. All her secrets were out, and Rae hadn’t judged or rejected her. She’d exposed herself emotionally, but could she be as brave about her sexual needs? Her instincts told her she could trust Rae completely. “Can we go to bed?”

  “Now?” The surprise in Rae’s voice was apparent. Maybe she should’ve taken it slower. Her lack of experience would’ve shocked anyone with a normal history.

  Audrey pulled away from Rae’s embrace. “Sorry, I’m being too forward.”

  Rae stood and offered her hand. “Not at all. I like a woman who asks for what she wants.” She look
ed at Cannonball, asleep on the carpet beside the sofa. “Will she be all right?”

  “Looks fine to me.”

  “Maybe we should leave her something familiar in case she wakes up.” Rae grabbed the tail of Audrey’s sweatshirt, waited for the okay, and shucked it over her head. She dropped it on the floor next to the sleeping kitten. “There, that should do nicely.” She reached for the waistband of her baggy sweats, but Audrey stopped her.

  “I think that’s enough.”

  “Not nearly.” Rae guided Audrey into her bedroom and onto the side of the bed. “Now…can I take them off now?”

  “You first.”

  Completely at ease, Rae removed her clothing one piece at a time in a slow burlesque that teased Audrey with each motion. She slid her arms out of her sweatshirt, then lifted it inch by inch over her head, revealing an expanse of ivory skin that Audrey ached to touch. Her small breasts were free, and the darker nipples puckered as if Audrey’s gaze were a caress. Rae skimmed her sweatpants down over slender thighs and kicked them away. The triangle of auburn hair between her legs glowed in a patch of sunlight like a slow-burning ember. Rae stood nude in front of her.

  Audrey had fantasized seeing a fully developed woman completely undressed, imagined what she’d look like, wondered about the similarities in their bodies. She’d only groped the slight curves of a teenager through clothing, never actually seen her lover naked. Now she stared at Rae, appreciating the distinct and subtle attributes of a woman.

  Rae was tall and lean, her almost-translucent skin following the cut of feminine muscles. Her squared shoulders were strong and the curve of her hips slight yet seductive. The swell of her breasts, the taper of her waist, and the slight bulge above her pubic mound screamed woman. Audrey felt embarrassed as the moments passed while she continued to stare.

  “You are so gorgeous, Rae. May I touch you?” The self-assured woman in front of her shifted from side to side and her ivory skin flushed. “Did I say something wrong?”

  “I’m not used to somebody asking before they touch me.” Rae stepped closer. “You can do anything you want.”

  Audrey’s hand shook with excitement and years of anticipation as she stroked the side of her face, watching Rae’s eyes spark with passion. Rae’s skin was hot against her palm and the feeling coursed through her, welcoming and right. Sliding her hand down the middle of Rae’s chest, she covered the beating pulse and savored the feel beneath her fingers. The beat accelerated and the tempo became her own. Her body ached with the fullness and newness of sensation. She never imagined a simple touch could be so intimate yet so full of vitality and desire.

  “This is so…I can’t find the words.” Audrey gently stroked Rae’s breasts and licked each nipple, watching them pucker from her efforts. She cupped a breast, sucked it into her mouth, and kneaded the malleable flesh with her tongue. Rae’s moans of enjoyment made her wet, and she wanted more than life to please this woman. She prayed her lack of experience wouldn’t disappoint Rae.

  Audrey kissed Rae’s taut abdomen and rested her cheek against its smooth surface. This was how a woman’s body should look and feel—an exquisite, unaltered, welcoming path. She raked her fingers through the short patch of hair between Rae’s legs, rewarded with a sharp intake of breath and the scent of arousal. She wrapped her arms around Rae’s waist and hugged her tight, unwilling to let go and unsure what to do when she did.

  “I can’t stand much longer if you keep touching me,” Rae said.

  Audrey reluctantly released Rae and looked around the cozy room filled with morning light. She suddenly felt terribly shy, inexperienced, and exposed. Her full breasts bulged from the skimpy lace bra and her nipples dimpled with excitement. Then she remembered the final skeleton in her closet, the one that hadn’t seemed at all important until this moment. It lay hidden beneath two layers of clothing and a film of self-consciousness.

  She couldn’t tell Rae, afraid of rejection. This secret seemed even more personal than the others, more damning. It broadcast a failure of autonomy, of her very character. How did you come to grips with the inability to protect the soul’s sacred temple? Audrey hadn’t yet. “Would you mind closing the curtains?”

  “I’ll do better than that.” Rae lowered a blackout blind over the window and pulled the curtains. The room was almost completely dark. “I want you to be comfortable.”

  “Then kiss me.”

  Rae knelt in front of where Audrey sat on the bed and gently separated Audrey’s knees with her hands. Her skin was hot as she slid between Audrey’s legs and brought them closer. Rae’s warm breath signaled their proximity seconds before their lips met.

  Audrey drank in the cushiony softness as Rae traced her lips with the tip of her tongue. Heat swept through her and pooled between her legs. Teenage kissing had been all about animalistic desires, not this intimate physical urging. She opened to take Rae in, sliding and stroking her tongue against Rae’s, savoring the promise of it.

  Rae released the clasp of Audrey’s bra and cupped her breasts in her palms. Audrey concentrated on the touch. She wanted to isolate and memorize the coarse feel of Rae’s thumb as she dragged it across her nipple. The sensation spread from the point of contact, twirled to the base of her breast, and spiraled down her abdomen. Several hands seemed to massage and manipulate her at once. She moaned and gasped for breath, the intensity almost unbearable.

  When Rae slid her fingers into the waistband of Audrey’s sweats and inched them down, she didn’t object. She hoped it was dark enough. Audrey felt only need, deep and demanding. Skin smoothed against skin, cool at first, then hot and damp as Rae eased her back onto the bed and settled on top of her. Their next kiss liquefied her insides. Unable to capture a full breath, Audrey pulled back. She wanted the visual of Rae Butler wedged between her legs, head resting between her breasts, face flushed with desire, desire for her.

  Audrey felt Rae’s slick arousal against her leg as she shifted sideways and rubbed herself along her length. She wanted to dip her fingers into the depths of her, but was too mesmerized by Rae’s hands on her flesh. Rae teased Audrey’s breasts, flicked her nipples playfully, and gently caressed her sides before reaching lower. Rae feathered light touches around Audrey’s thighs, darted closer to her sex, swept across her stomach, then suddenly stopped.

  Chapter Thirteen

  “Oh my God,” Rae whispered.

  She had slid her fingers over the irregular raised scar on Audrey’s abdomen and had spoken without realizing it.

  Audrey immediately interpreted her words as rejection. Sliding out of her embrace, she drew her knees to her chest like a frightened child. Even in the dim light of the room, Rae could see the pained expression on her face.

  “It’s hideous,” Audrey said. “The doctor wasn’t exactly a reconstructive surgeon. I paid him for his silence, not his expertise. It’s a bit like a jigsaw puzzle, isn’t it?”

  “Please don’t do that.” Audrey’s attempt at humor was more telling than her tormented body language.

  “Do what?”

  “Try to make light of this. Audrey, I—”

  “You don’t have to explain, and you certainly don’t have to touch me again.”

  Rae scooted gently toward her. “I’m sorry. I didn’t expect it.” She raked her fingers through Audrey’s hair and looked her in the eye. “I very much want to touch you again. You’re a beautiful woman and nothing he did can change that. If anything, I want you more. Please believe me.”

  People responded to traumatic events differently. They even remembered things inconsistently from one conversation to the next. Rae had seen everything from hysterical laughter to complete emotional meltdowns. Audrey had obviously chosen to deny and suppress the details of her assault. The scarring most likely constantly reminded her of what she perceived as personal failure, an inability to protect herself. For someone as independent as Audrey, that would cut as deeply as the wound.

  “Will you hold me for a minute?”

&nb
sp; The despair in her tone ripped at Rae’s heart. She wished she’d been there for Audrey during those awful times. Apparently no one had been, or Audrey hadn’t allowed anyone in.

  While Audrey rested against her chest in silence, Rae pieced together the details of her initial attack, becoming increasingly more uncomfortable. Should she share her suspicions about a connection in the cases? She cared too much to cause Audrey any more pain. She hugged Audrey tighter against her chest, trying to shelter her from the unknown.

  “I can’t breathe.” Audrey placed her hand between Rae’s breasts and stretched back to look her in the eyes. “Are you sure you’re okay with this…?” She glanced down at her body. “I don’t want you here because of some sense of misplaced duty or pity.”

  “Oh, Audrey, the last thing I feel for you is pity. You’re the most resilient, amazing woman I’ve ever met, not to mention sexy, desirable, gorgeous, hot—”

  “Enough with the flattery. Kiss me before I change my mind.”

  Rae claimed Audrey’s lips and again intense feelings flooded her system. She arched to meet Audrey’s stroking hands, hungry for her touch. Its delicacy reminded Rae of her confession, of her inexperience.

  She slid down on the bed, taking Audrey with her until they lay facing each other. “Relax. You don’t have to do anything.” Audrey’s eyes shone with gratitude and desire that spoke to Rae’s deepest need. She’d been many things to women in bed, but never a teacher. The role excited her more than she could’ve imagined. Few people received the gift of innocence and virtue in an age of sexual freedom. Audrey hadn’t given her trust easily; she’d exhibited true courage and Rae wouldn’t take it lightly.

  “If I do anything you don’t like, tell me.” She cupped Audrey’s face and encircled it with light kisses, savoring her delicate scent. Audrey’s skin warmed as Rae painted a path with her lips across her forehead from eyelids and high cheekbones to the tip of her chin, over and over. Their bodies touched only there, and the tension built inside Rae with each gentle kiss.

  When she finally allowed herself to taste Audrey’s lips again, she feared she’d lose control. Audrey sucked hungrily on her tongue, and with each pull Rae felt the tender tug at the base of her clit. She clamped her legs together. Surrender would be so easy, but she wanted to be fully present and totally aroused as she satisfied Audrey. She refused to allow her own pleasure before Audrey’s.