Heartbreak's Reward (Double Dutch Ranch Series: Love at First Sight Book 2)

by Mary J. McCoy-Dressel

  “Ah, only a couple day’s this time, I’m sorry to say. Enough time to get Mom upset, I suppose. I weighed the options and decided coming home was the best even for this short time.” He made a turn in the direction Jase told him. “If everything goes well, I’ll be back soon. But…there’s a big mission coming up…that’s all I can tell ya, J.C.”

  Jase remained quiet, but he squeezed Brenna tighter. Seeing his brother again was so good, but the short time would only make the family miss him more. It choked him up that when he left, he could end up anywhere in the world and they’d never know. Brenna cuddled close to him as if she sensed his need, her fragrance floating through his psyche like a sedative.

  When they pulled up in front of Brenna’s, Jase said, “Come in with us a minute, Dane, and meet Chloe. Davy might as well get a shock too. I see his truck’s still here.”

  “What else is new?” said Brenna with a subtle sigh. “He’s grown on me though. I give him that.”

  Jase motioned for Brenna to go ahead through the door. Chloe and Davy were sitting on the sofa watching TV. Davy jumped up. “I’ll be damned! Dane, that’s you, dude?” He went to him and reached for his hand. “I haven’t seen you in forever.”

  “Shit, I wouldn’t have recognized you on the street. You’re all grown up.”

  Davy glanced back at Chloe. “Yep, I sure am.” He brushed his hair out of his eyes and went back to the sofa.

  “Chloe,” began Brenna. “This is Jase’s youngest brother. He popped in tonight.”

  She stood like a young lady and went to shake his hand. “My God, another brother, but I hear you’re a soldier instead of a cowboy. Anymore brothers in your family?” she said to Jase.

  “We’re it. Don’t let him fool you. He’s a cowboy at heart.” He patted Dane on the back. “Trust me, the three of us can sometimes seem like a dozen. Wait until our cousin Caulder gets thrown into the mix. All he tries to do though is get us on a practice barrel. He thinks we should be bull riders like him.”

  Jase didn’t mind at all when Brenna invited Dane to take a seat. Especially when she took his hand and dragged him into her bedroom, saying she had to show him something. “What do you have to show me, sweetheart?”

  “My lips against yours.” She kissed him. “I wanted to say good night without an audience. A part of my insides is still yearning.”

  “I’ll have to brother-proof my house. That’s the second brother who played a part in interrupting my sex-life with a striking woman.”

  “I’m so glad you get to see him.”

  Jase closed the door. He lifted Brenna to the bed and eased atop of her. “This isn’t how I expected our night to end, baby.” He moved to his side and ran his hand over her breasts. “I want you to remember what this feels like when you go to bed tonight.” Pushing her dress above her thighs, he slid his hand underneath.

  “If you do this you’ll make me nutty and I might scream.” She caught his hand. “Next time,” she whispered.

  “You’re right, I can’t walk out of this room all excited. Getting caught once tonight is bad enough, but I’m thrilled my little brother is home.” Jase stood and straightened his shirt, hair, and his body. He held out his hand to Brenna. “I better get him over to see Mom before they all go to bed.”

  “I’d love to see the look on her face.” Brenna slid her dress down. She walked over to her dresser and turned the lamp on.

  “You could have.” He hauled her close. “I can’t get enough of you, woman. Make me leave.”

  “No.” She snickered. “I don’t want you to, but you must.” She turned and opened the door.

  “Stop by tomorrow after Chloe’s class. Let me know how it went.” He kissed her again. “Good night, doll. I sure love you a lot.” Taking her arm, they returned to the living room and Davy was gone.

  Jase walked over to his brother and clunked him in the head. “Let’s go see Mom, dude.”

  Chapter 27

  When Jase and Dane left, Brenna dropped to the chair. “Whew, what a long day. The restaurant was fabulous, Chloe. So romantic.” For a brief moment she reflected on what Jase said about weddings being held there, her thoughts at the time catching her off guard. Would Jase even want to be married again after the hell he went through?

  “So what’s with the other brother? They all look alike, but different too, you know. This one has light hair.”

  “They do look a lot alike. The new one, Dane, is the youngest. Those three Carlson guys sure do have those pretty blue eyes and muscles to die for. Jase’s are the best of course,” said Brenna, chuckling.

  “You’re a little prejudice, sis.”

  Brenna stared into Chloe’s eyes. It’d been a long time since she called her sis except for the other day. She liked the sound. “So what about class tomorrow, sweetie?” She moved to the edge of the chair.

  Chloe peered at her for an instant but looked away. “The instructor said I can come in to observe a class and to bring gym clothes.”

  “Yeah? Is that your plan?” Brenna shivered and brought the light blanket around her shoulders, sitting to the back of the chair again. A vision she didn’t want to see raced through her memory, seeing in her minds-eye her two sisters on the mats going through their forms in perfect unison. Will I be able to do this? She had been so focused on whether or not Chloe would be able to handle it, not thinking of herself.

  Chloe went to the kitchen and made a sandwich. “Do you want anything to eat, Brenna?”

  “No thank you.” She tried to keep the sound of her voice upbeat. “We had so much to eat earlier.” And drink. “The wine was delicious.”

  Chloe came back and took a seat on the sofa. She lowered the volume on the TV. “About tomorrow. I will give it a try, but I’m not getting a uniform yet.” She took a bite of her sandwich and Brenna sensed her thoughts ran rampant as she took her time chewing her food and looking into space.

  Another little piece of her heart melted away, noticing what seemed to be Chloe’s anxiety. She was so glad to have her sister back, and it made her realize how important this move had been for both of them.

  “It’ll be a mixed class, so it won’t be so bad walking in with only black belts. I came so close to getting mine.”

  “And maybe you still will…right?”

  Chloe didn’t say anything. Brenna rose from the chair. “I’ll be right back, I need to change.” Oh, this will be hard. Before she got to the hallway, Brenna turned. “Dane said they’re having a party at his mom’s tomorrow.” She laughed. “But, Judy doesn’t know it yet!” She came back and asked Chloe to unzip her dress. “Will you go to the party with us? I can almost guarantee Davy will be invited, or he’ll do his usual pop in.”

  “I’ll go, but it doesn’t matter if Davy is there or not. I made some friends. I like it over there at Judy’s house. Destiny is hilarious… If you have her in your class you’ll need some mats because she’ll have you on the floor.”

  ***

  They sat in the parking lot for at least fifteen minutes. “The class has started, Chloe.” Brenna viewed her sister beside her in the front seat, her seatbelt still on. She wore black workout pants and a purple t-shirt. Her hair was pulled into a ponytail. Protective gear remained in the backseat, and as far as Brenna knew, it hadn’t been taken out of her bag for two years. She could be wrong. “What’s your biggest fear about going inside?”

  Chloe peered at her, a blank stare on her face. Her eyelashes fluttered and she looked away again. “We didn’t do one class apart. She was always with me.”

  Brenna took a minute to collect her composure because Chloe was right. They did every single class together, every test, and all the events. “She still is. Jordann is with you each day.”

  “Bren…she’s gone!”

  Oh, God. Oh, God…gone. All of them. She reached for her sister’s hand. “You don’t have to do this.”

  “Yes, I do.” Chloe brushed a tear off her cheek. “I have to go on…” She stared at Brenna. “We b
oth do. Remember I said I was tired of mourning? It’s true, but how? How do I stop?” Taking a deep breath and wiping her eyes, Chloe paused and Brenna died a little more. “Maybe I need to face this as the first step.”

  “Chloe, how did you get so grown up?” She wrapped her arm around her sister’s shoulder. “I love you so much. We will get through this.”

  “Let’s do it,” said Chloe. She removed her seatbelt and opened the door, pulled the seat forward, and took her bag from the back.

  Brenna gathered her strength, got out, and went around to stand in front of her. “If this starts to go bad—”

  “We’ll leave and never speak of it again. Never.” Chloe turned toward the door. “Come on, sis.”

  Following Chloe inside, the immediate smells of the gym area hit Brenna in the face—the rubber mats, sweaty bodies mingled together. Familiar. Jordann! She took a deep breath. They sat at the end of the first row of chairs. Looking around, it wasn’t too crowded—about ten students on the floor and three black belt instructors, some doing one-on-one training.

  One of the black belts, a young guy, came toward them, knelt in front of Chloe and introduced himself as James. He was the one Chloe had talked to on the phone and had expected her. “Do you plan on staying after class today?” he asked.

  “I’m not sure yet. I did bring my gear.” Chloe stood and so had James.

  “Take your time, observe and see if we fit what you’re looking for. You’re welcome to come back another day, too, if you’d like. If you stay after, we can do a bit of sparring. I’d like to see where you’re at in your training. We’ll see. Definitely go through a few forms.” He glanced back toward the mats. “Let me know if you have questions while you’re here. Thanks for considering us.” He nodded to Brenna before leaving.

  She watched as he stopped at the mats, bowed, and walked on toward his students. When they began their warm-ups and forms, a stab hit Brenna in the gut. All she could see was leaving that night and the girls were laughing, proud they had accomplished another step in their training. Their parents waited in the parking lot, and they had all planned on going to dinner. That’s why Brenna had been with them that night.

  She couldn’t breathe. “I’ll be right back, Chloe.” Brenna almost ran to the nearest bathroom when she left the gym, went into a stall and leaned against the door, unable to stop crying. She clutched her chest, closing her eyes, and imagined holding Jordann in her arms, so wanting to inhale the smell of her hair. Different from Chloe’s. Jordann insisted on being different that way. She’d joke saying she might look like her sister, but she didn’t have to smell like her.

  Deep breath, Brenna, breathe. Away from it for two years now seemed like yesterday. The ache returned like it had just happened. She hugged and rocked herself. Chloe needs me. I need to get out there. Taking three rapid breaths, Brenna dropped her arms to her side and slowed down her breathing, but she couldn’t stop crying. “I miss you so much, Jordann.”

  It took another ten minutes before she could get control. Once the memories and emotions let loose, they wouldn’t stop. “Chloe needs me.” She left the stall and went to the sink, taking a paper towel to dab at the corners of her eyes. She willed herself to stop crying. Gripping the sink, she closed her eyes, picturing Jase and his smile, and if she thought about it hard enough she could feel his arms around her. Yes. Hold me, Jase.

  The door opened, bringing her out of her muse and she blinked, trying to dry her tears before heading back to her sister. When she entered the gym, Chloe glanced at her and her eyes were misted. Brenna took a seat beside her, ready to lose it again. Without saying a word, Chloe got the black belts’ attention and he came over.

  Chloe handed her bag over to him. “I’d like to donate my protective gear to anyone who could use it.” She turned and went out the door.

  Brenna followed after her, unlocked the car and they both got in. They hooked their seatbelts and turned toward each other, neither saying a word. Brenna started her car and pulled out of there.

  “Can we go to Jase’s ranch,” asked Chloe. “Davy will be there before they go to Judy’s.”

  “Of course.” Brenna turned right onto the 60 and headed toward the Double Dutch.

  ***

  When Brenna pulled up at Jase’s, he came out the barn door and waved them over. She’d never seen him that dirty and rugged looking before. His jeans had small tears in them and were filthy. His t-shirt was faded, but in no way took away from the hard body beneath. The scruff on his face was thicker, and she had the sudden urge to run her fingers over it. He pulled his hat low on his forehead and stood waiting. He was one sexy, dirty man, and she wanted to wrap herself up in him, sweaty body and all.

  “Bren, I hate to say it, but your boyfriend is kinda hot for an old guy.”

  She chuckled. “I was thinking the same thing. Trust me, he’s not old.” Hot for sure!

  Chloe opened her door and ran toward Jase and wrapped her arms around his waist. He glanced at Brenna when she stepped out of the car and encircled his arms around Chloe. Her petite, five foot six inch body looked so small wrapped in his arms. He understands.

  At that moment Davy pulled in beside her, said hi, and headed to the barn as soon as he saw her. Chloe left Jase’s arms, and wiped her cheeks. Brenna sniffled, holding back tears again. Chloe spoke to Jase before turning away. Davy put his arm around her and walked away to a side section shaded by the barn. “My God, where did these guys come from?” Cowboys. Damn.

  Jase came toward her. “I take it that went bad. Come here, baby.” He grabbed her into his arms, placed his hand against the back of her head, and held her tight. “I’m sorry,” he whispered against her hair. “I’m too dirty to be holding you.”

  Dirty and sexy. “You’re important to her. She needs you as much I do…almost. You’re correct, it didn’t go well. It’s over, no more of that. Neither of us could handle it.” Brenna hugged him tighter.

  “I know what you need.” Jase took her arm and they walked into the barn. He put the bridle on Warrior and walked him outside to the step stand. “Can you hold the reins for a minute? I’ll be right back.”

  “Ask him, not me. Will he stay?” Brenna hooked her finger in a belt loop and stretched to give him a kiss. She strummed her thumb across his jaw. “I love you.”

  He ran his dirty hand through her hair and she didn’t care. “Honey, I love you, too.” He kissed her again. “He’ll stay with you. I need to run back to the tack room.” She and Warrior both watched him walk away.

  “Warrior, he’ll be right back, boy.” Brenna smoothed her hand over his mane and across his warm back. As Jase said before, his mane was the color of her hair. She no sooner spoke to the horse and Jase returned with a cowboy hat and set it on her head. Maybe she’d have to look into buying a hat now that she had boots. Next time, she’d wear them over and surprise him.

  “The sun is too hot this time of day. You need to wear this hat.” He backed away and gave her an appraising glance. “Perfect. No matter what time of day or night it is, you always seem to about knock me on my ass.” He motioned toward the horse. “Get on up there, hon.”

  Brenna handed him the reins and pulled the hat lower on her head. “Thanks.” She stepped on the stand and threw her leg over Warrior’s back. “Bareback again, I see.”

  “You might have a good idea. What do you say?” His lips tilted in a smirk.

  “Is that your plan on this horse? Mr. Carlson, shall I be worried about being ravished by you?”

  “Not this time, doll. Count on it one day. I want to prove it can be done.” He got on Warrior and walked over to where Davy and Chloe stood in the shade of the barn. “I guess you can see we’re going for a ride.”

  “The hat fits you, Bren,” said Chloe. “I do believe this here cowpoke has turned you into a cowgirl. Wait till he sees your boots.”

  The secret was out. She peered over her shoulder. “Yeah, dude, she’s right. I bought boots, too.”

  “Ye
ehaa, let’s go.” He pulled on the reins and turned Warrior toward the desert. Looking back, he yelled, “Behave yourselves!”

  “You best get us out of here, cowboy, before you get it thrown right in your face from my litter sister.”

  “Hold on.” He kicked his heels in and Warrior went into a cantor. “Let it all go, baby, while we ride. Be free like the wind. My horse will do his part if you let him. I should know. I have to do this often myself. He’s like my tranquilizer sometimes.” Jase slipped his arm around her and flapped the reins against Warrior’s neck. “Let’s go boy.” They went into a gallop.

  “Don’t let me fall off,” shrieked Brenna. She leaned against his strong chest and held his arm as it was tight around her. Closing her eyes, she put her trust in him and his animal, and let the sadness blow off her like a dust storm.

  Leaning into Brenna, he whispered. “We won’t be long. It’s too hot out here for animals and humankind.” Jase nuzzled his scruffy chin against her neck. “I gotcha, honey. Count on me always having your back.”

  “Mmm, a pleasant thought.” They rode a ways farther and Warrior slowed to a walk. “It’s so incredible here. Hotter than hades though! I can’t believe I’m riding in the desert when it’s 115 degrees. We must be crazy.”

  Jase chuckled. “I’ve been called that before. A monsoon thunderstorm could pop up any minute. Bet you never expected that in the desert. I guarantee you’ll be in one. And count on experiencing a dust storm. Either could happen right now.” He leaned forward and kissed her cheek. “You’re coming to the party, right? My brother has to leave tomorrow. Every time he goes I pray I’ll see him again.”

  Brenna squeezed his arm tighter. He hadn’t shown that kind of weakness before, except where his kids were concerned, and she felt his sorrow. “I’ll be at your party. Chloe, too. She likes being at your mom’s now. Maybe the horseback dream of mine for her will come true.”