Quenched in Blood

by Ari McKay

  “Thomas said it was angel-made,” Julian said. “Do you think…?”

  “Yes.”

  Another voice spoke, and Harlan moved into Julian’s view. The werewolf’s face was pale, his eyes red, and his hands shook.

  “Yes, what?” Julian asked. “Yes, we should try to use the cauldron to bring back Thomas and Whimsy?”

  Harlan gave a jerky nod. “The legends say it can take a person’s voice as the price of bringing them back, but I’d rather have Whimsy back no matter what.”

  Julian hesitated. There were plenty of legends about the cauldron doing bad things, but most of the tales involved it being used by bad people. Surely something that the angels had made couldn’t be all bad. And even if it did take Thomas’s voice, he thought Thomas would much prefer to be alive.

  And Julian, of course, wanted Thomas alive more than anything else in the world. It boiled down to a choice—trying to bring Thomas back, or going to join him.

  Returning his gaze to Thomas’s beloved face, Julian nodded. “Then let’s do it.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  THOMAS emerged slowly from the void that had enveloped him. If he was still in his physical body, he might have said he opened his eyes, but his body was gone, left behind on the material plane. Instead, he regained awareness of his surroundings and found himself in a place that seemed made of light. The angelic presence he’d sensed in the cauldron had felt like a whisper, but here it was more like an entire orchestra playing at top volume.

  He looked down at himself and saw his body—or a translucent image of it, at least. He lifted his hands, which had a shimmery outline, and studied them, wondering if he could touch anything. Or if there was anything in this place that could be touched.

  “You’re seeing that because you haven’t let go completely yet.”

  Three nebulous forms emerged from the light and formed into humanoid shapes. They solidified slowly and took on appearances he recognized.

  “Mom?” Thomas took a hesitant step forward, reaching out to the being that wore the face he’d seen only in photos. “Dad?”

  “My son.” She held out her arms, and he ran to her with a pained cry.

  His eyelids stung, but no tears fell. As he clung to her, his energy overlapped with hers, and he sensed the truth of their connection. This was his mother. James joined his energy with theirs, and for the first time that Thomas could remember, he felt the love and protection of his parents’ embrace.

  When he drew back at last, all he wanted to do was look at them. James and Alicia appeared to be not much older than Thomas himself, and they were dressed in clothes similar to what he and Julian had worn for his training mission in the cemetery, so he assumed they looked as they did on the night they died.

  The third being moved closer, and Thomas glanced over to see Micah—and a surge of anger more powerful than any he’d felt in his entire life washed over him.

  “Stay the hell away from me!” Thomas glared at Micah, who stared at him with wide-eyed shock.

  “Thomas?” Alicia glanced back and forth between Thomas and Micah, a worried frown creasing her brow. “What’s wrong?”

  “I don’t want anything to do with him,” Thomas said, jabbing an accusatory finger at Micah. “This is his fault. All of it.”

  “His fault?” James frowned at Micah, obviously puzzled. “What do you mean?”

  “I mean everything that happened after Eli’s pack was kidnapped two years ago is on you,” Thomas snarled at Micah, who had stopped moving and raised both hands, palms out, in the face of Thomas’s baleful ire. “If you’d done your job instead of wallowing in self-pity, we could’ve tracked down those demons together and stopped them long before now. If you’d told me the truth and trained me like you should have, I could’ve helped you. Instead, you handed over the feather—our family feather—to outsiders and hid on the farm.”

  “You did what?” Alicia gaped at Micah.

  “What the hell, Dad?” James rounded on Micah, anger flashing in his eyes.

  Micah looked between his son and his grandson and slowly lowered his hands. “I was trying to protect Thomas. I didn’t want this life for him. The fighting. The fear. The early death.”

  “Well, guess what? You didn’t protect me from shit,” Thomas said, still glaring. “I fought, I was afraid, and now I’m dead. We could have dealt with the threat together and neutralized it long before it got to this point. Everyone who suffered or died because of the demons in the past two years? It’s on you. That includes me and Whimsy. I didn’t have enough stamina to survive using the cauldron because you didn’t train me.”

  Micah’s shoulders slumped, and he dropped his eyes. “Don’t you think I know that now? At the time, though… I was half-crazy with grief. I raised James to fight, and it got him and your mama killed. I thought if I raised you differently, Thomas, that you might be free of our family’s burden. And it worked for twenty years! By the time Julian and the others came to me for help, it was too late. You would have thought I was a crazy old man.”

  The mention of Julian only served to remind Thomas of the effect Micah’s deceit and how Julian had been needlessly racked with guilt. Any softening of the resentment he felt for Micah disappeared as anger welled up anew.

  “I believed Julian,” he said, clenching his fists so tight that if he’d been corporeal, he might have drawn blood from his palms. “He and the others showed me concrete proof, and I realized they were telling the truth. He helped me and protected me when he didn’t have to—certainly not after the load of guilt you dumped on him!” He whirled to face his parents. “Julian thought your deaths were his fault,” he said, leveling an accusatory finger at Micah. “Because of him!”

  “Why would you do that?” James stared at Micah in disbelief. “Julian was our ally—our friend. He didn’t deserve to be treated that way.”

  “And you knew damned well it wasn’t his fault,” Alicia added. “Why would you put that burden on him?”

  “Because I had lost almost everything that mattered to me!” Micah snapped his head up. “It was wrong, I know it now, but at the time, all I wanted to do was cover up what had happened and get back to Thomas. I knew you hadn’t told Julian about Thomas yet, and I wanted to keep him away, because I know Julian! He would have insisted that Thomas be trained, and I didn’t want that.” Micah looked at Thomas, his expression haunted. “The only excuse I have is that I was out of my head with grief. Julian’s a tough old bastard. I thought in time he’d get over it. Everything I did, Thomas, right or wrong, I did because I couldn’t bear to lose you too. If the demons hadn’t come back, you never would have known about any of this. You would have been safe and had a normal life.”

  “You call being trapped on that farm without any friends normal?” Grief over everything he’d missed washed over him, and if he could have cried, he would have. “If the demons hadn’t come back, I would have spent my life wondering why I felt like there was something missing inside me, like I had no purpose. I would have missed out on the short time I had with Julian. At least I had that, but I wanted more. I wanted a lifetime.”

  “Julian?” Alicia’s eyebrows climbed, but she seemed more amused than dismayed. “Really?”

  Thomas gave her a watery smile. “Really. I loved him, and he loved me.”

  “Julian?” Micah’s face looked like he’d tasted something sour. “Maybe I should have let him train you. That way he would have seen you as a kid and wouldn’t have tried to get into your pants.”

  “We’re both dead, and you’re still thinking of ways you could have controlled me?” Thomas rounded on Micah, newly furious. “Do you think that would have stopped me from being gay, or is it Julian you object to? You know, the vampire who’s busted his ass to keep the area safe for centuries.”

  Micah looked embarrassed. “Your grandmother was always talking about Julian and how handsome he was, how he had such wonderful manners and all. I know she loved me, but I think she had a crush on
Julian. It was hard to take, especially when the bastard didn’t get old and gray like me.”

  “Oh, please.” Alicia let out a little snort. “Just about everyone I knew had a crush on Julian at one point or another, including me.”

  “Pretty much,” James said, and his sheepish smile revealed far more than his words.

  Micah looked stunned; then he shook his head. “Lord help me.” He turned to Thomas once again. “I’m sorry for everything. I know that doesn’t mean much, and you’ve lost everything. I wish I’d done better by you, Thomas, but what I did, I did because I loved you and wanted you to be safe. Maybe that don’t mean much to you right now, but I hope at some point in this long eternity, you’ll find it in your heart to forgive me.”

  Hearing the word “eternity” reminded Thomas sharply of where he was and of everything he’d given up. He didn’t regret his death if it meant the end of the demon invasion, but he mourned all the experiences he would never have and the loss of his chance for a long and happy life with Julian.

  “Eternity is a long time to hold a grudge,” he said as he turned his back to Micah. “But I’m nowhere near ready to forgive you.”

  “I understand.” Micah nodded. “You don’t have to talk to me if you don’t want to. But maybe someday.”

  Thomas didn’t have anything else to say to Micah, so he focused on his parents. At least he could get to know them at last. Dozens of questions crowded his mind, but before he had the chance to ask any of them, he gasped and stumbled backward, feeling as if someone had reached into his chest and yanked hard.

  “Thomas?” Alicia reached out to him with worry in her eyes, but Thomas couldn’t speak, and when he tried to clasp her hand, his fingers passed through hers. “Thomas, what’s wrong?”

  “I think he’s going back,” James said, resting his hands on Alicia’s shoulders. “I hope so.”

  Thomas felt as if he was being dragged backward by an invisible force, one too powerful to resist. James’s voice grew fainter, but Thomas caught the last words he said.

  “We don’t want to see you back here anytime soon.”

  When Thomas emerged from the void this time, he felt the weight of his physical body like bricks on his chest. He drew in a few deep breaths as he tried to adjust to the swathed-in-cotton feeling of being back—and then his eyes flew open when he realized he was back!

  He looked around at the familiar and welcome sight of Julian’s bedroom, and a relieved smile curved his lips.

  “Julian?”

  A figure turned from near the fireplace; then Julian crossed to the bed. He sat on the edge of the mattress, looking down at Thomas. His face seemed thinner, and he was pale and drawn as though he’d not slept or fed in ages. But the light in his blue eyes was fierce, and he clasped Thomas’s hand. “You’re back. Oh, thank the Most High, you’re back.”

  “I’m back.” Thomas curled his fingers around Julian’s and squeezed gently, drinking in the sight of Julian’s face. He could scarcely believe this was real, not a dream or a vision. “But how? What happened?”

  “We put you in the cauldron.” Julian looked a little pensive as he made the admission. “I wasn’t thinking clearly, because we didn’t know what the thing would do to you. You could have come back without your voice, or the Most High knows what else. But I had to do it. Even though you were probably in a good place, I was selfish enough to know I can’t go on without you.”

  “I was in a good place,” Thomas said. “I saw my parents. But I was also angry. I wanted more time here with you.”

  Julian drew in a deep breath and released it on a sigh of relief. “I’ve gone back and forth over the last five days about whether I did the right thing. I was even beginning to wonder if you didn’t want to come back. Whimsy woke up in less than a day, so when you didn’t, I began to fear the worst.”

  Thomas tried to process that information as he pushed back the covers and sat up. For him, it felt like barely any time at all had passed, but apparently time worked differently where he’d been. “No, I wasn’t resisting. I was yelling at Micah.”

  Julian’s eyes grew wide. “You mean that old bastard got to go up instead of down after everything he did? Seriously? I thought the Most High had standards!”

  “Yeah, I was a little surprised myself.” Thomas grimaced. The one thing he didn’t regret about dying was getting the chance to tell off his grandfather. “Anyway, he knows how angry I am with him. He apologized, but I’m not ready to forgive him yet.”

  “I don’t blame you.” Julian ran his fingers through Thomas’s hair, and his eyes were suspiciously bright. “I’m just so happy you’re back with me. When I thought I’d lost you forever, I was ready to end it all myself so I could be with you.”

  Thomas leaned into the touch and smiled. “I’m glad you didn’t. I’m glad the cauldron brought me back. And you said Whimsy is back too? Is he okay? What about the others? And what did you do with the cauldron?”

  “Whims is fine. According to Harlan, the first thing he said when he woke up was ‘That was unexpected.’ Typical Whims.” Julian shook his head. “Everyone else is all right too. We brought back two others—including Garrett, the bear shifter. He was grateful. Turns out he wasn’t one of the group the possessed shifters attacked in the mountains a few months ago. He was out hunting by himself and got unlucky. And as for the cauldron… it’s here. In the catacombs below the basement. Whimsy magicked the place up with every protective spell he could find; then we called in Brianna to do her thing. Until we figure out what to do with it in the long term, it’s in about as safe a place as it can be.”

  “So it’s over.” Thomas felt a weight he didn’t realize he’d been carrying lift from his shoulders, and he released a long breath. “Murmur was destroyed, and the cauldron is safe. It’s really over.”

  “It really is,” Julian replied. He was quiet for a moment, and when he spoke again, his tone was urgent. “I wasn’t trying to control you, you know. I just…. Something in me was in a panic about losing you. I would have done anything to keep you safe, but I overstepped. I shouldn’t have said what I did, Thomas. I hope you’ll forgive me.”

  “You did overstep, but I had a pretty knee-jerk reaction myself,” Thomas admitted. “I forgive you.”

  “Thank you.” Julian’s smile held relief. “I meant what I said before you died. I do love you, Thomas. If you still want me, I’m yours.”

  Thomas cradled Julian’s cheek in his palm. “I meant it too,” he said softly. “I love you, and I still want you.”

  “Good.” Julian leaned in, pressing his lips to Thomas’s, kissing him slowly, almost reverently. Then he pulled back and gazed into Thomas’s eyes, letting Thomas see all of him—the love and the need and the yearning. “So, how do you feel? Are you thirsty? Hungry?”

  Thomas paused to take stock, and despite being unconscious for five days, he wasn’t hungry or thirsty or in any pain. In fact, he felt better than he had before dying, as if the cauldron had rejuvenated him in ways beyond bringing him back to life. He was more than he had been, and he suspected the cauldron had not only given him back his life but also extended it.

  “I’m good,” he said. “Great, actually. You look like hell, though,” he added with a teasing smile as he stroked Julian’s cheek with his thumb. “Maybe we could take care of your hunger and mine at the same time.”

  “Maybe we could.” Then Julian kissed him again, not holding back any of his desire.

  Moaning into the kiss, Thomas slid his arms around Julian and drew him down onto the mattress, eager to celebrate their well-deserved reunion. The battle was over, the demons were gone, and Thomas had a second chance to enjoy the long and happy life he’d wanted with Julian—and he intended to savor every minute of it.

  ARI MCKAY is the professional pseudonym for Arionrhod and McKay, who have been writing together for over a decade. Their collaborations encompass a wide variety of romance genres, including contemporary, fantasy, science fiction, gothic, and
action/adventure. Their work includes the Blood Bathory series of paranormal novels, the Herc’s Mercs series, as well as two historical Westerns: Heart of Stone and Finding Forgiveness. When not writing, they can often be found scheming over costume designs or binge watching TV shows together.

  Arionrhod is a systems engineer by day who is eagerly looking forward to (hopefully) becoming a full-time writer in the not-too-distant future. Now that she is an empty nester, she has turned her attentions to finding the perfect piece of land to build a fortress in preparation for the zombie apocalypse, and baking (and eating) far too many cakes.

  McKay is an English teacher who has been writing for one reason or another most of her life. She also enjoys knitting, reading, cooking, and playing video games. She has been known to knit in public. Given she has the survival skills of a gnat, she’s relying on Arionrhod to help her survive the zombie apocalypse.

  Visit Ari on:

  Website: arimckay.com

  Facebook: www.facebook.com/pages/Ari-Mckay/266185570179748

  Twitter: @AriMcKay1

  By Ari McKay

  DREAMSPUN BEYOND

  ASHEVILLE ARCANA

  #1 – Out of the Ashes

  #19 – Forged in Fire

  #32 – Quenched in Blood

  DREAMSPUN DESIRES

  THE WALKER BOYS

  #24 – Striking Sparks

  #35 – Breaking Bonds

  #69 – Seeking Solace

  Published by DREAMSPINNER PRESS

  www.dreamspinnerpress.com

  Now Available

  Out of the Ashes

  By Ari McKay

  Asheville Arcana

  In their differences, they’ll find strength—and love.

  Alpha werewolf Eli Hammond returns from a fishing trip to discover a nasty surprise—five members of his pack murdered and the rest missing. He needs help locating and rescuing his pack mates, but the supernatural council in Asheville, North Carolina, turns him away.