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I'll Be Damned

Page 18

by Erin Hayes


  “I hope you choke on it.”

  He responds by sinking his teeth into my neck. He doesn’t choke; I do.

  I cry out raggedly as my blood spills into his mouth and down my neck. So much pain. I have been bitten plenty in my time but being bitten on the neck is always the worst. It feels like an invasion, like he is forcibly taking control of my body.

  Then I gasp as I feel my muscles start to twitch. Not now…not now…

  The mania overtakes me. Whenever I am especially upset or allow my emotions to get the better of me, the mania takes over, and I collapse in pain. Sometimes I pass out, sometimes I ride it through to the end. Regardless, it leaves me helpless for the entire duration, and afterwards.

  This is not the best time to be incapacitated.

  I jerk in his arms, my control over my body gone now. I am in my own haze of pain that is being amplified by the burning in my throat where he sucks, as if oblivious to my pain. Silver Bane shoots back up into my palm, and my arms fall to my sides.

  I cannot fight back.

  I cannot get out of my own torment.

  I am lost in a world of pain of his making, and he knows this.

  Blackness edges into my vision. Is this what death feels like? A fine line between pain and regret? I don’t regret a moment of my life as the Harker. This is my fate, and this is the fate of all who walk this path.

  Still though, I wish there had been more for me. More life, more smiles, more love. And I will die at the hands of this monster, another name in an article that will scare the city into terror once more. It will be made all the worse because there will be a new Harker.

  Hazel.

  I have not taught her everything that I wanted. There is still so much to learn and pass on. If she survives beyond tonight, she will be alone in her own new world.

  Please protect her, I pray to our ancestors.

  Resignation at my fate pulls at me as my vision blurs from tears and lack of oxygen. My mouth works uselessly, but nothing comes out. Nothing can be said anymore.

  I feel my life blood leave me, and there is no more pain, only numbness. A sudden calm comes over me, as I know that it will all be over soon.

  I look back over to Hazel’s form, and, despite everything, smile. Be strong, sister.

  I see a white light, a void of nothingness just beyond our reality. There is a sense of familiarity waiting for me, like a presence that my soul calls to. For a moment, I am caught between both worlds, a contrast between the dank, dark alley, and the beautiful emptiness beyond. With every heartbeat, I feel myself pulled more and more into the white void.

  And, then, the mortal coil snaps, and I am completely in the blank nothingness. Heaven? No. Something else.

  A hand touches my cheek, and I look up, recognizing the face that smiles down at me. Suddenly everything makes sense. I smile back and lean into the warm touch of the woman standing before me. This is where I belong now. With those who love me. The future is bright. No more pain. No more anguish.

  I have passed on the mantle to my younger sister, and I am just Catherine again.

  “Hello,” I say, feeling at peace. “Hello, Mama.”

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  Sci-fi junkie, video game nerd, and wannabe manga artist Erin Hayes writes a lot of things. Sometimes she writes books.

  She works as an advertising copywriter by day, and she's an award-wining New York Times Bestselling Author by night. She has lived in New Zealand, Hawaii, Texas, Alabama, and now San Francisco with her husband, cat, and a growing collection of geek paraphernalia.

  You can reach her at erinhayesbooks@gmail.com and she’ll be happy to chat. Especially if you want to debate Star Wars.

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