Frozen Barriers

by Sara Shirley

  As she’s grabbing my hand to drag me out the doors, she’s chatting on the phone with someone, but as I look at the time on my phone, I realize there is no way I’m making it to my gym class on time. So much for my day off.

  Suzanne and I walk across the parking lot to the Ninety-Nine restaurant. As we walk inside, Suzanne drops her phone back into her bag. We walk past the hostess station and down the back to a table where two guys are sitting with another girl. The girl looks up and smiles at Suzanne before bringing her into a huge hug. Suzanne whispers something into her ear before leaning over to one of the guys whose back is toward me. I wonder if I’m crashing this lunch, but she did say she wanted to catch up, so I’m pretty sure she thinks her friends won’t mind me being here with them.

  Once Suzanne turns back to me and waves me over, the guy she was talking to gets up and faces me. It’s when I meet his eyes that I realize they are the only eyes that have ever had an effect on me. Those eyes that caused my heart to flutter and my hands to sweat from being so close so long ago. He moves over to me, allowing Suzanne to move into the booth and me to sit next to her.

  As I make a move to slide in next to her, he leans down to my ear and whispers, “Hi, Barbie. You never called me back about showing you my moves.” A ripple of something goes down my spine as I look up to him with my mouth hanging wide open in shock.

  He’s no longer that high school senior; he’s a tall, lean mass of pure sex on a stick, and if I thought he was hot back then, it’s going to be torture trying to get through lunch with him sitting beside me. At least this time around I have my own car to get me home.

  We are all sitting in the booth at the Ninety-Nine waiting for Suzanne to come back from getting her phone fixed at the mall. Josh’s shift ended, and he drove up to meet us. My sister Courtney is still good friends with Suzanne, and as odd as it is, Suzanne is a great addition to our little circle. She and Josh broke up a long time ago, but Courtney always saw her as the sister she never had, and well, they stuck like glue, and Josh just had to get used to it.

  It isn’t often that all of us have days and time off to meet up, so this is one of those gatherings that feels like a reunion. Courtney’s phone starts ringing, and she begins chatting with someone, giving me a look and an evil grin. When she hangs up, she quickly starts giggling. Sometimes it’s hard to forget my little sister is a junior in college and no longer a kid.

  “What’s so funny?” I’m intrigued at who might have been on the phone with her.

  “You’ll see. According to Sue, someone else will be joining us for lunch,” Courtney says before a huge grin spreads across her face.

  Aww, shit! Who the fuck did she run into at the mall, and why did she think it would be a good idea to bring them to have lunch with us?

  Josh pipes up and asks, “Did she tell you who it is?” Courtney sucks on her straw and just nods her head up and down. “Do we know this person?” More nodding up and down. Courtney jumps out of the booth as she sees Suzanne walk in and gives her a squeal and hug. They start giggling, and Courtney looks over Suzanne’s shoulder.

  I have a feeling the other person is standing behind me, so I can’t see. However, Josh is staring over his shoulder, and his jaw drops. “Holy shit,” he whispers.

  Suzanne leans down and whispers into my ear, “I seem to have stumbled upon someone at the mall who I believe you may have some unfinished business with.” Oh, for the love of God. Who the fuck did she find over there? I stand, thinking I’m about to pummel someone, and then I see her eyes staring back at me. Fuck me. I just ran into her at the Forum a short time ago, but she walked by me. Now, she’s staring at me, and it’s like she’s back in the car with me all over again, just eight years later and completely grown up. She’s still got that killer body and insane rack.

  I’m about to have a little fun with her, and I bet I can make her squirm in her seat a bit. As she’s scooting into the booth next to Sue, I lean down and gently graze her ear, whispering, “Hey, Barbie. You never called me back about showing you my moves.” She quietly gasps, turns her head slightly toward me, and just as I expected, her face blushes. I laugh to myself and sit down next to her, pushing in so close that my leg touches hers. She pulls back slightly, although she thinks I don’t notice her nervousness. As she tries to slide farther away, I’m drawn into her low-cut top, and she smells like coconuts or something tropical. Motherfuck! I’m going to need to readjust myself a few times before this lunch is over.

  Suzanne starts the introductions. “Emily, you remember Josh and Jeremy, but I don’t believe you’ve met Courtney. Courtney is their little sister. She and I never could quite separated each other after this douche nozzle and I split up.” At that remark, Josh growls deeply while bringing his beer up to his lips.

  Emily shifts slightly, but speaks up, “Hi, Courtney. It’s a pleasure meeting you. Yes, I remember Josh and Jeremy. It’s been a while, but you guys haven’t changed that much.”

  I laugh at that statement. Obviously, she didn’t believe that because she completely ignored me at the rink a little while ago. Emily must notice my attention to her statement, as she turns her head toward me and cocks her eyes as if asking me, What the fuck is your problem?

  Oh yeah, time for the games to begin. I bow my head, so only she can hear me. “Barbie, obviously, we all can’t look the same after eight years or else you wouldn’t have completely ignored my presence at the Forum just a few weeks ago. But, hey, we all can’t be as perfect as you.” Somehow, I think I may have sounded more annoyed than I wanted because she seriously looks wounded by my words and on the brink of tears. Shit. Her mouth drops open, and she turns her body away from me so all her attention is back on the rest of the group. Courtney, however, blatantly kicks my shin under the table, letting me know she heard my statement, and I guess it didn’t come out as I intended it to.

  “So, Emily,” Suzanne says, “what have you been doing all this time since you left the Forum club? I don’t usually see you on Facebook much since I graduated from college.”

  “My mother had me transfer to Boston Skating Club, and I attended Boston University for a while to major in geography, not that it did any good, though, since I’ve only been allowed to skate competitively for the last five years. I probably would have been able to stay in touch more had it not been for training and school.”

  Josh leans up on the table. “Funny you and little brother over here never ran into each other. He was apparently some hot shot on campus while he played hockey at BU.”

  “I never spent a lot of time on campus while I was there. I did a lot of my courses online because of my training schedule. Most of my competitions were during the school year, so I was either on the road or at the skating club until the season ended,” Emily explains with sadness in her voice.

  “Wow, you must be really good then if you travel that much for competitions. What’s the one place you’ve been to that you’ve absolutely loved?” Courtney’s eyes light up. “I love traveling. I just don’t have the money to go very far, but someday.”

  “Well, I love the traveling aspect of competing, which is why I majored in geography at BU. I love history, environments, and cultures, but I never really got to experience much of that while away. Probably the most visually stunning city I’ve been to is Paris,” Emily says with more enthusiasm.

  “Don’t let her fool you, Court. Emily here is the shit when it comes to skating! She ditched my skating club back in high school because she was that good. Isn’t that right, Em? In fact, she’s going to be one of the top contenders for the National Championship in Boston this year.” Suzanne is so excited she’s jumping in her seat.

  Not trying to be mean, but more inquisitive, I ask, “I’m surprised you’re still skating after all this time. I mean, for a figure skater, you’re what twenty-two now? You must be starting to think of what you want to do once your competing days are over.”

  Again, Courtney kicks my shin under the table. What the fuck? I scowl at
her as she gives me a stern eye. What did I say?

  Emily looks at me, clearly taking my statement the wrong way. “Jeremy, I know I won’t physically be able to compete much longer, and although it’s not my first love, I really have no choice in the matter. As for what I plan to do after I am done, I’m not sure. I’ve never had that option to think about. My life. I’ve always had dreams of what my life would have been if not for skating or my parents, but I’ve never had that choice. So, if you want to sit here and try to make it sound as though I’m washed up at twenty-two and have no future path, go ahead. I don’t see you with the big NHL contract, so that evidently means your big BU hockey player status didn’t get you very far if you’re still here and skating at the Forum.”

  Ouch. This one has fire underneath her façade.

  “Oh my God!” Josh leans up to signal Emily for a high five. “That was fuckin’ awesome, girl! I don’t know where you just pulled that from, but damn, you just put Jeremy back in his rightful spot!” Everyone starts laughing, including me, because I’m truly happy where I am and contract or no contract, this is my life, and I’m still having fun. But, when I see Emily sitting there no longer chuckling, I know I fucked up.

  Of course, at that moment, the waitress steps in and asks the girls what they’d like to drink. I’m more than shocked when Emily orders herself a Shipyard Pumpkinhead beer with a rim job. I glance at her, completely engrossed in her boldness, when the most amazing words come out of her mouth. “I don’t know about you, Jeremy, but I just love licking off those rim jobs!” Time for me to readjust my cock again, thanks in part to my naughty little ice princess sitting next to me.

  Who does he think he is? He has no idea what my life is like, and to make it sound as though I’m some perfect little snotty brat with nothing but a face and bank account? True, my parents have funded my skating career; however, I’ve managed to do a few shows and won competitions that have allowed me to earn my own money. It hurts that he actually sees through my worst fear. What will I do when I can no longer compete? What happens when the endorsements are no longer there and the next generation of skaters is on the cusp of hitting it big? I honestly have no idea. I never wanted to continue with this lifestyle after high school, but once I managed to advance to the senior level, my parents wouldn’t hear of me quitting. All they kept talking about was winning and making the family proud.

  I must have been lost in my own mind, as I’m brought out of my thoughts by snapping fingers in front of my face. “Hello, Earth to Emily. Your rim job just arrived,” Suzanne jokes.

  “Oh, sorry. I didn’t mean to zone out,” I respond quietly.

  I glance back over toward Jeremy who now has his phone out tapping on his screen and sipping his beer. I must have offended him or something because he’s no longer even paying attention to the group. Fine, he wants to ignore me. I’ll get his attention. Gathering up all my courage to act sexy in front of people I barely know, I pick up my Pumpkinhead beer and more than eagerly start licking off the cinnamon sugar rim with my tongue, moaning as if it’s the best thing I’ve ever tasted. I can see out of the corner of my eye Sue, Josh and Courtney all chuckling at my apparent sexual bravado. I then look up to my right to see Jeremy’s eyes bugging out of his head, his mouth hanging open, and his hand slightly tugging at his shorts. I stop my licking while staring him straight in the eyes, and because I can’t hold it in any longer, I begin laughing hysterically.

  Suzanne wraps her arm around my shoulders and exclaims, “Oh my God! You little vixen! I see I taught you well back in high school!”

  “Hey, Jeremy. When is your next practice?” Courtney asks. Practice? I thought he was just skating around at the Forum.

  “The team starts back up next week, but we’ve got meetings all this week, so I’ve got to work on some conditioning skills before then,” he says, lowering his phone into his jeans pocket.

  “Are you going to get us tickets again this year? You know Dad is your biggest fan, and he loves seeing you skate,” Courtney says as she picks at the label on her beer bottle.

  “Yeah, don’t forget about your brother over here either, or the next time you drive down Route 93 you are getting pulled over,” Josh says teasingly since he knows I drive that route all the time to get to the rink. Most of the time, he’s covering the Boston area with his cruiser, but he’ll swing up to the Andover sector on occasion.

  “I’ll see what I can do for you guys,” Jeremy says.

  Evidently, I missed something here. Why would they need tickets for games if he’s only at the Forum? Sue must have sensed my confusion. “He’s been playing for the Manchester Monarchs for a while,” Suzanne states quietly into my ear.

  Shit, really? Of course, this big cocky ass plays for a minor league hockey team. Me and my big mouth just made me the laughing stock of this table. They all probably think I’m completely full of myself. I honestly should have never agreed to come over here with Suzanne. Jeremy must have somehow heard Suzanne, because the minute she goes back to talking to Courtney, he leans his face my way and gives me a look and a smug smile that says, Who’s the ass now?

  I shake my head and look up from my beer as my eyes start to mist. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think…I really ought to…Can I squeeze by you? I need to use the restroom.” Jeremy moves out of the way, giving me a questioning look, but there is no way I’m making eye contact with anyone at the table now.

  “Em, are you ok?” I hear Suzanne ask, but before I know it, I’m already in the ladies’ room locked inside the stall. Why do I even try to be in social situations? I was never able to have normal friends to hang out with and talk to my entire childhood. Now, look at me. I’m so socially awkward that I’ve become a sniffling mess because I tried to be funny and fit in. I’ve completely embarrassed myself and now I’ve got to figure out some kind of excuse to get out of here as soon as possible.

  After about five minutes, I make my way out of the bathroom doors only to walk right into a tall wall of a muscular man. His arms wrap around my elbows, and I look up into the same big, brown eyes that I was running away from to begin with. I step away quickly, trying to make my way back to the table and then the hell out of here.

  “Emily, stop,” Jeremy says firmly. I turn around and look to the floor since I’ve managed to not only insult him, but also embarrass myself. “You all right? You took off really quickly from the table. I thought maybe that rim job didn’t exactly agree with you.” Jeremy laughs as he crosses his arms and leans back against the hallway wall. “Tell me something. Did you run off because you can’t handle your booze, or because you tried to have a comeback line and instead made your face look like Christian Grey’s red room of pain?”

  “How do you…”

  “Seriously, I have a twenty-one-year-old sister, and have you met Sue? I know all about those books you girls are reading these days,” he replies. Of course, he does. He’s quick to respond to my inquisition. “Now, how does someone like you know about the red room of pain?” Okay, we need to seriously get off the topic of the only form of romance in my life, not that BDSM screams romance, but a girl can dream. Now’s not the time to admit to him that I occasionally dabble in erotic romance novels.

  “Listen, Jeremy. I’m sorry for being so quick to judge you back there, but you have to understand, I’m not like the rest of you. I’m not used to being in social situations a lot where the television cameras aren’t involved, and even then, everything I am supposed to say is scripted. I should really get going. If you don’t mind, I’m just going to settle the bill with Suzanne and head out, but it was nice to see you again.”

  Why am I so completely wrapped up in this shy little skater chick? One minute she’s licking cinnamon sugar off the rim of her beer causing more than just a stirring in my pants and the next she’s embarrassed to the hilt because she wasn’t aware of my hockey career. She might have gotten away once eight years ago, but I’ll be damned if she thinks she’s spending the next eight stuck in the same sec
luded life I know she’s living. I’m not sure why she’s staked her claim on me; it’s not like either of us has a shitload of time to spend together. I might have knocked her on her ass years ago, but every time I see this girl, she knocks the words right out of my mouth.

  I push off the wall and make my way back to the table, only to see Emily isn’t there. “Where did Emily go?” I ask everyone.

  Suzanne looks up at me. “She said she had a yoga class or something to get to. I gave her my cell number, and she said she’d give me a call to get together soon.” Bullshit. She’s running again. You don’t go to yoga after drinking a beer. I make my way to the front doors to see if I can catch her before she leaves, and I hear Courtney ask everyone where the hell I am going off to in a hurry. I’ll have to explain this one to her later. Hopefully, she won’t say much to Mom. She’s already wondering when either of her two oldest boys is going to finally settle down and have grandkids for her. If she hears I’ve been running after a girl I’ve basically met twice in my life, she’ll be planning my wedding before the end of the night.

  Fuck it!

  Once I’m outside, I see her across the parking lot looking for her keys inside her purse. I start sprinting across the lot before she’s just about to unlock the doors. “Emily!” I shout. She turns and sees me running toward her, and her face shoots up in shock. I make it to her car, putting one finger up as I’m leaning over onto my knees and trying to catch my breath. Seriously, I better start hitting up the gym a lot more in the next week. Spending my summer at the beach only doing twelve-ounce curls was not a wise idea.

  “Jeremy?” she questions as she plays with her car keys in her hand.

  “Hang on two seconds…” I raise my hand with one finger pointing up.