Mine to Save

by Diana Gardin

  Stepping inside, I close the door behind me and her voice drifts across the steamy haze.

  “Will you wash my back?”

  My cock fully standing at attention now, the throbbing almost painful as I’m overwhelmed with everything Sayward. Her scent, amplified by the steam. Her body, accented by the water sliding over her skin.

  Her beauty, magnified by ten. She’s fucking gorgeous.

  I crowd her, stepping up into the space behind her. I hear her gasp as my arms cage her in, bracing on the wall in front of her. Her head falls back against my bare chest, her hair tickling my skin as she peeks up at me.

  Dipping my head, I catch hold of her earlobe between my teeth. “No,” I murmur. “I want to start with your front.”

  Turning her around in my arms, my mouth crashes onto hers, and it’s like a fucking flip switches in my body.

  I’ve been holding back with her all week, letting her head heal before I made her mine for good. It’s been a fucking feat, sleeping beside her every night with that lush body pressed against me. Driving to work with her every day, passing her in the office when she smiles that smile that no one else understands. She belongs to me in every way, except I haven’t had her body since before Colombia. Her concussion needed to heal, and so did her emotional state.

  So being with her like this now, my body’s working itself into a frenzy and I don’t know if I’m gonna be able to hold myself back.

  Groaning as she opens her mouth to me, our tongues tangle and I yank her body even tighter against mine: no space, not a breath between us.

  I can’t get enough of this woman.

  Her nails rake up my back as I pull away, staring down at her. Both of my palms cover her perfect tits, feeling their heavy weight as I pinch her nipples and roll them between my fingers. They’re hard and needy, and I drop my head to pull one into my mouth. Sucking hard, I feel Sayward’s deep moan as I use my teeth and my tongue to ramp up her arousal. Making her hotter, wetter, more impatient for me.

  She whimpers as I draw a line with my tongue across the valley between her breasts, her hips thrusting forward. My cock strains to get to her, pulling forward with a lust so fucking strong I’m blind to everything but her.

  Just Sayward. This moment.

  This lifetime.

  My hands slide around her back, holding her close, as my eyes meet hers. Those deep hazel irises are dark with desire, and it’s taking everything I have not to slam into her right now.

  “It’s been over a week.” My voice drops low as my eyes rake over her goddess-like body. “I need to taste every fucking inch of you.”

  She sighs as I drop to my knees in front of her, pressing a hot kiss to the inside of her thigh. She shifts her weight, ready, restless.

  Waiting.

  Holding her firmly in place in front of me, I bury my nose between her legs. Water drenches the thin line of hair leading to her pussy, and I inhale her sweetness. It’s like a drug. One I’m never giving up.

  “Damn, beautiful…you’re the sweetest thing…” My tongue dips into her folds, lapping up the desire that clings to her swollen skin. “…I’ve ever tasted.”

  She shudders in my hold, and when I glance up her head drops back against the wall.

  “Bennett,” she says, her voice strained.

  I pull her clit—so fucking sensitive—into my mouth and suck. Her knees go weak as she moans again, and my hands tighten around her to hold her upright.

  Sliding two fingers inside her tight little pussy, I’m just driving myself insane. She’s the hottest thing in the world, and she belongs to me. Jesus.

  She rides my hand as I use my fingers and my tongue to bring her to the edge, and just as I feel her walls start to clench around my hand, I pull back.

  “Don’t come,” I order, my voice like gravel in a blender.

  She lets out a frustrated little mew, and I grin as I stand. Jerking her leg up around my hip, my cock settles between the warmth of her legs. Her eyes go wide as she moves her hips, creating a friction that she hopes will satisfy her ache.

  Rubbing my finger through her heat, I shake my head slowly. “I want my dick to make you come. I’ll make you come again with my tongue after.”

  Her eyes go all heavy and she licks her lips. I fucking love her like this, lost to the way my body makes her feel.

  It gives her a little taste of what she does to me.

  “Bennett.” She breathes. Her eyes plead with me, and I pause with my head cocked to the side. “Don’t be gentle this time.”

  All the breath leaves me. The last time I wasn’t gentle with her…I scared her. I never want to experience that again.

  I swallow, my dick feeling like it could explode if I wait another fucking second. “You don’t want that, Sayward.” It’s a warning, but it’s also a prayer. Her asking me to unleash the beast I keep caged inside?

  She’s not ready for that.

  Her fingers go to my face, holding me in place and forcing me to look at her. It’s like she can read my goddamned mind. “I’m ready. I want you…the real you. All of you.”

  I groan, seconds away from losing my shit as I drop my forehead to hers. “No condom. You want me to grab one?”

  She shakes her head, slow and deliberate. “No. I trust you.”

  “I’m clean,” I offer.

  She smiles. “I know.”

  And then her smile turns to the sexiest, hottest expression in the world when I slam into her with no other warning. Her lips part, her eyes roll back, and I grip her leg tighter to keep her from falling.

  “Fuuuuuuck.”

  Being inside Sayward with a condom on was a game-changer. But being inside her bare, with hot water running all around us while her slick body is pressed against mine?

  It’s a fucking life-changer.

  Glancing down at where our bodies are joined, I pull out and slide back home. This time I grind my hips against hers, pressing against her clit, and her moan is almost feral. Grabbing her wrist with one hand, I slam her arms up above her head and pound into her again.

  “God,” she cries, her eyes closing with pleasure. “Harder.”

  And that’s when I lose my motherfucking mind. This woman…Jesus fuck, she’s gonna kill me slowly.

  I empty all of the craving, the devotion, the hunger that I’ve ever felt for her into that moment. My body meets her relentlessly, again and again until my name is all I hear as it falls repeatedly from her lips. When her voice rises into a wail, I grip her other leg and pick her up completely off the ground.

  As I feel her walls clench around me, pulling at my dick like she’s starved for it, I see stars. My balls draw up tight, so tight I think it’ll fucking kill me, and I roar as my release pours into her in a hot rush.

  I drop my head against her neck, panting as my heart pounds like a racehorse in my chest, my hips jerking as every muscle in my body tenses and then releases, draining the strength from me.

  I go down, sliding to the shower floor, pulling Sayward safely into my lap as my ass hits tile.

  We’re both silent, panting, catching our breath as the reality of what the fuck just happened washes over us.

  “Are you okay?” I ask, a little frantic as I push the hair away from her face.

  She smiles up at me, a sleepy, peaceful expression in her eyes. “I’m perfect. I love the real you.”

  She blushes, the faint pink tinge turning her skin the most perfect shade of red, and I know for a face that I’m gone for this woman.

  Done. They can call the game right the fuck now, because I’m never going back.

  She’s mine. For as long as she’ll have me, and even then I’ll fight to make it longer.

  I stand with Sayward in my arms, turning off the shower and wrapping a towel around us. Padding to the bedroom, I lay her across my bed and sprawl out beside her.

  Gathering her into my arms, I inhale her sweet scent and close my eyes.

  “I don’t know when this happened,” I admit in a w
hisper. “It was my job to protect you, and I accepted that without question. Hell, it was my idea. And then when you were taken, it wasn’t just my job anymore. It became my life’s mission to save you.”

  I pause, trying to figure something out. Sex with Sayward shouldn’t be as addictive as it is. Her inexperience alone should have meant that one time was enough. But every time I’m inside her, I’m taken to a place I’ve never been before. Even when I was married, I never experienced anything like it. I just want more of her, and I know I’ll never get tired of it.

  But it’s not the sex that holds me to this woman. It’s the very heart of her, the essence that makes her Sayward. I want to hold on to her, keep her safe, make her smile every single day. I want to draw laughter out of her, because I know that I might be the only one who gets to hear it.

  I want to be the center of this woman’s world, because she sure as hell has become the center of mine.

  She turns into me, her strong fingers tickling my scruff as she strokes my jaw. It’s something she’s taken to doing, and I fucking love it.

  “I don’t know when it happened, either. But I think you started saving me the second you agreed to work at NES. And now? I can’t imagine my life without you.”

  I brush my mouth against hers. “You’re staying here, you know that right? With me.”

  She smiles and lets out a sigh, her sleepy eyes drifting closed as she settles against me. “Don’t want to be anywhere else.”

  It doesn’t matter how we got here. Because we’re here now, and she’s right.

  There’s nowhere I’d rather be.

  Epilogue

  Bennett

  Six Months Later

  The sun sinks closer to the tops of the palm trees, and I glance out over the waves crashing against the shore under our feet. Then I glance left and right, analyzing the line of men standing in white shirts tucked into light brown slacks beside me.

  It still blows me away, being included in this group of men who have become my brothers. At the front of the line, Grisham stands, shifting from his prosthetic foot to the other, looking nervous as hell. But the second the music changes and everyone seated in the white chairs on the sand stands, his expression goes calm.

  Greta appears on Jacob’s arm at the top of the dune about fifty feet away, and every single man in our line breaks into a huge grin. As Greta travels down the aisle, my eyes travel to Sayward, where she stands holding a bouquet of white flowers. Her yellow dress looks amazing against her bronzed skin, her dark hair hanging down her back in a long, thick braid. I’m caught staring at the way the dress hugs her sexy curves as her eyes lock with mine.

  Her lips tug into a knowing smile, and I turn mine up a notch and send it right back. God, I know this is Greta and Grisham’s day, but it’s gonna be damn hard to keep my eyes off my woman.

  The ceremony progresses, hitting all the important points as we watch Grisham and Greta promise to love each other forever, exchange rings, and kiss for the first time as a married couple. As they retreat down the aisle and the rest of the bridal party follows suit, I fall into step beside Sayward.

  She takes my arm, and I lose sight of everything but her, the way her small hand grips my bicep, the way the setting sun shines on her glossy black hair.

  “You look so damn beautiful tonight,” I whisper as my lips brush against her sweet-smelling hair.

  She smiles up at me, holding my gaze like a social champion. She still struggles with the same things she always has, but I’m okay with that, because it’s a part of her. And she’s gaining the confidence to know that the people around her love her no matter what.

  After we’ve taken photos, everyone heads over to the huge white tent set up just down the beach.

  Tugging Sayward into my side, I let everyone else walk ahead of us, their excited chatter dying down as they retreat.

  “Sayward.” I squeeze her hand, making her look at me.

  She stops walking, brushing a stray lock of her hair behind her ears as her bare feet pause in the sand.

  “We’re going to be late.” She smiles. But she doesn’t sound like she’s in a hurry, and I’m sure as hell not.

  “I love you.” I take both of her hands in mine and look at her, really look at her, to make sure she knows just how deeply I feel those words.

  Because I do. I feel them all the way down to my soul, and that’s never going away. This woman has marked me for life, and I’ve been biding my time for the past six months, trying to make sure that she had everything she needed to be okay after the whole ordeal with the cartel.

  I finally feel like she’s ready.

  She nods, her eyes melting into pools of chocolate. “I know, Bennett. And I’m grateful for the way you love me. Every day.”

  “You changed my life, you know that? Meeting you, convincing me to join the NES team, allowing me into your heart…it was all such an honor. It still is, beautiful. And I’m at the point now where I can’t wait another second to do this.” My voice trembles on the last words, and I shake my head a little.

  Get your shit together, Blacke. This is only the single most important moment of your life. Don’t be a pussy.

  Her forehead creases, and I can see her trying hard to read between the lines and the frustration that always comes when she knows she’s missing something other people might get. “Do what?”

  Dropping down to my knee, I release one of her hands in order to reach into my pocket and pull out the white leather box.

  “This.” Using one hand, I open the box and with the other hand just squeeze her hand as hard as I can without hurting her.

  Her gasp lets me know she finally gets it.

  She finally realizes I’m about to ask her to spend the rest of her life with me.

  “Sayward Diaz, I want you to be my wife. I need you to know that in the little house that we share together you’re an equal partner. I need to know that you belong to me, and I belong to you, and that it’s gonna be that way for the rest of our lives.” The words tumble out on one breath, and I force myself to slow down and breathe steadily. “Marry me, beautiful.”

  She glances at the ring, but my eyes never leave hers. Tears well up in them, and my heart squeezes tight just before it expands at her next word.

  “Yes.”

  It’s a simple answer, but it’s all I need. Standing up, I pull her into my arms and spin her around.

  “Yes.” I breathe. “The rest of our lives start right now.”

  A Note from

  Diana Gardin

  Writing about a heroine with autism was something that happened organically. When Sayward first appeared in Sworn to Protect, I knew that she was going to be different than any other female character I had ever written, and as her character traits developed, it hit me very suddenly one day: Sayward has autism.

  As a teacher, I’ve taught many children with autism over the years, and they’ve always had a very special place in my heart. It seemed as if many of them had many things they wanted to say and no viable way to communicate their innermost thoughts and feelings. They were wired differently, but oftentimes their differences made them feel inferior or as if they didn’t belong. That’s why Sayward is written the way she is. I was drawing on my classroom experiences working with children with autism.

  But Sayward isn’t a child, and I wanted to make sure I wrote a believable adult character on the autism spectrum. So I hunted down my friend Kennedy Ryan, who has a son with autism. I knew she was plugged into the autism community, and she directed me toward a sweet lady who is the mother of an adult child with autism. This woman, Karen Lowenstein, read the Mine to Save manuscript and gave me her honest opinion on Sayward’s character and whether or not I did her justice as a brilliant, beautiful, quirky, high-functioning young woman with autism. Without Karen’s feedback, I never would have felt comfortable enough to let Sayward out into the world, but as it is, she’s become one of my favorite heroines to date. I hope you love her as much as I do!
<
br />   For research, I read a lot about the autism spectrum and talked to parents of children who live with it every day. For more information about autism, visit www.autismspeaks.org. And consider visiting Kennedy Ryan’s organization that unites authors together in the fight against autism at http://lift4autism.com.

  Did you miss Jeremy and Rayne’s story? Read on for an excerpt of the first book in the Rescue Ops series, Sworn to Protect.

  Available now!

  Rayne

  My heels click on the polished marble floors as I hurry from the inner office back to my desk in the outer suite. The air, chilly in the late evening hour, feels extra frosty as it filters through my silk sleeveless blouse. I throw a glance back over my shoulder, my eyes scanning the empty hallway behind me for any sign of him.

  Just because I don’t see him doesn’t mean he isn’t close. And getting closer.

  A sound echoes somewhere in the giant building, close enough that it ricochets through my body like a gunshot. I jump, my heart leaping into my throat as my pulse skyrockets.

  I go still, listening.

  The sound of insistent footsteps pounding on the same marble I just traversed spurs me into moving again. I skid to a stop at the end of the hallway, looking down the intersecting hall in both directions.

  Which way? Which way?

  Going for the exit would be the long way. The elevator is two halls away, and my movements can be tracked on any security camera. Especially when my boss, who started this multi-million-dollar tech corporation, is the man I’m running from now.

  Oh, my God. I need to get home. I need to get to Decker.

  Thinking of my sweet boy triggers a new surge of adrenaline inside me, and I leap forward, choosing to head right, toward the stairs. At least if I’m in the stairwell, I can hear anything coming above me or below me. All I’ll have to do is get down fourteen floors to the lobby, and then I’m free.