The Lessons We Learn

by Alexandra Warren

  Well… almost, his boxers the only thing standing in the way of me and my prize. But instead of pulling those down and taking me right there on the wall, Khalid stepped out of his pants and grabbed my hand to lead me toward the bedroom, the moonlight seeping through the window the only thing illuminating the space.

  It was just enough to see the rigid outlines of Khalid’s muscles once he removed his shirt and then his boxers, his dick springing to attention like always as he stroked it in his hand. And while I would’ve been content being witness to that show for a few moments, I was encouraged to put a little pep in my step once he laid on the bed and asked, “Are you just gonna stand there and watch, or are you actually gonna join me?”

  In no time at all, I was pulling my dress over my head and tossing it to the side, then stepping out of the panties that were already mangled from before. And when I finally joined him on the bed, it wasn’t to straddle his lap or lay on my back, but to swallow him whole as I used a stream of saliva to create a mess on his dick with my mouth.

  “Ohhhhh shit, Jay,” he hissed, his head falling back against the pillow in delight - and maybe surprise since this was the first time I was returning the favor. But tonight was a special night and deserved to be celebrated in a special way that could most certainly become the norm if he kept gassing me up with all these groans, and moans, and mumbled curse words.

  It was the type of praise that encouraged me to pull out all stops, switching between sucking him dry and stroking him with both of hands, going back and forth between licking and massaging his balls, and doing things I had only read about but had yet to actually try since Jason hadn’t been deserving of that kind of attention.

  But Khalid deserved. And I was going to do everything I could to let him know I was just as invested in this as he seemed to be, using my actions to communicate that I was down for whatever he saw fit for us moving forward.

  I was ready to be his.

  As if my point had been received, Khalid took complete control of the situation, flipping me onto my back and gliding into me with an easy plunge that took my breath away. And it stayed gone as he stroked me weak, my legs resting against his shoulders as he gave me every inch of his dick. I mean, you would’ve thought he never wanted me to breathe again considering the way he never let up, my screams of pleasure only making him go harder as the headboard continuously crashed into the wall behind us. But not even the thought of hotel security being called on us was enough to stop me from greedily accepting everything he was dishing out, my fingers burying themselves in his hair once he bent his head down to kiss me.

  The more sensual his kisses became, the deeper his strokes went, taking a slower pace as he brought a hand to my chin and kissed me tenderly. But just when I thought we were taking the love-making route - another first -, he switched it up on me, pulling out and flipping me onto my belly before diving into me from behind.

  “I can’t get enough of you, baby,” he growled as he grabbed my ass and pumped into me with powerful strokes that damn near had me running up the wall. But staying put was far too gratifying to try and escape it, his body hovering over mine as he moved his hands to cover my fists that were gripping the sheets.

  In fact, I was just sure I was going to rip them to shreds when Khalid hit another gear, going into overdrive to brand me as he filled every little crevice he could over and over again until I was hit with a vicious wave of an orgasm that made my entire body hum with ecstasy. And thankfully, he wasn’t too far behind me, grunting as he filled me with his essence that only seemed to make my pussy throb even harder as if it was trying to milk him empty.

  He fell onto his side, taking me with him as he draped an arm around my waist and whispered in my ear, “That might’ve been some of the best sex I’ve ever had.”

  “Might’ve?” I asked, halfway joking, halfway wondering who I had to one up.

  But instead of entertaining my little competition, he only chuckled as he planted a kiss to my shoulder before pulling out, his seed already beginning to leak from me when he offered, “I’ll grab you a towel.”

  Laying there waiting, I felt completely satiated outside of the incessant vibrations from Khalid’s phone on the nightstand. And while I knew it was really none of my business who was trying to get in touch with him at this hour, I called myself peeking at the screen for emergency purposes, completely caught off-guard when I saw Shawnie’s name attached to the messages.

  “Why would she be texting him this late? Matter of fact, why would she be texting him at all?” I thought to myself just as I heard Khalid returning from the bathroom, trying my best not to look too suspicious when I told him, “Your phone was going off.”

  He handed me the towel before reaching to check it, the smile of a reaction on his face making my face scrunch in annoyance as I tried to just mind my business. But I couldn’t mind my business knowing who it was on the other end, the sight of him actually responding to whatever she had sent turning my clean-up a little aggressive since I didn’t want to ruin the vibe by voicing my thoughts.

  On the other hand, not voicing my thoughts in my last situation was what had allowed things to get completely out of control by the time I did say something. So instead of keeping it to myself, I straight up asked, “Why is she texting you?”

  His thumbs went still on the screen as he peeked my way with a confused look. “Why is who texting me?”

  “Oh, so he’s going to play dumb now?” I thought, sitting up a little more in the bed to answer, “Shawnie. I saw her name pop up on your phone.”

  “So you’re going through my phone now?” he asked with his face pulled into more of a scowl, both the question and the reaction making me sick since that really wasn’t the case at all.

  I was quick to explain, “No, it just… popped up. On the screen. A lot of times. She must’ve had a lot to say to you.”

  Disappointedly shaking his head, he turned the screen my way to show me, “She sent some of the pictures she saw online from tonight, and asked why didn’t I invite her since this would’ve been her only chance to be on some VIP shit. I told her, I got her next time.”

  While the pictures were right in my face, along with every text of their exchange, Khalid’s response only made me frown as I crossed my arms over my chest and asked, “Oh, you got her, huh?”

  It was clear he wasn’t catching my drift, only shrugging as he sat his phone to the side. “Yeah. What’s wrong with that?”

  He settled into his spot next to me on the bed as I turned his way to answer, “She wants you, Khalid. You said it yourself. So why would you even be entertaining that by texting her all late at night and what not? Do you know what kind of message that sends?”

  I was talking about the message it sent her when I really should’ve been talking about the message it sent me as the one he was supposed to be spending time with. But instead of putting me at ease, he only smirked when he replied, “I wouldn’t have even known she had texted me if you hadn’t told me, Jayla.”

  He was trying to be funny, but I wasn’t going for it, snatching the comforter over my body as I fell against the mattress with my back turned to him. And instead of just leaving me alone, he rested on his elbow right behind me and asked, “Jay, why are you trippin’ on me? Just because she shot her shot and bricked, that means we can’t have any sort of friendship?”

  I flipped to face him so that I could explain, “Just like business, regular friendships have hours. And for us to be doing, whatever this is, I find it a little inappropriate for her to be texting you this late regardless of the context.”

  “So what exactly is this then, Jayla? Cause just this morning, you were all on your business shit. But right now’s “hours”, you showing up here tonight, says otherwise. So what’s really good?” he asked, catching me off-guard since I hadn’t been expecting to be put on the spot about it.

  My sex-induced confidence about our situation had almost been completely depleted now that we were arguing about
other women of all things. And just when I started to come up with something relevant to respond, Khalid cut me off, shaking his head as he said, “That’s what I thought.”

  My mouth opened, then closed, then opened again as he turned his back toward me the same way I had done to him earlier. And while I wanted to say more, wanted to put it all out there and just deal with whatever came from it, something told me I had some reevaluating to do first.

  Khalid

  She had tossed and turned all night. And when she finally woke up, she was still wearing yesterday’s little argument on her face, not even bothering to tell me, “Good morning” before heading straight for the bathroom. And even when she emerged with a fresh face and the hotel’s robe draped around her frame, she still wasn’t paying me much attention, not even looking my way until I asked, “I take it you’re still upset?”

  “Upset about what?” she asked with a quick glance before pulling her eyes back to her phone.

  I wasn’t going to let her nonchalance about it get me off-track, getting straight to the point once I answered, “Upset about last night, Jayla.”

  She shook her head, too busy getting her scroll on to look at me when she replied, “Nope. Your message was received. I’ll stay in my lane and mind my business until I can stop trippin’, or whatever you called it.”

  Crawling a little closer to her side of the bed, I sighed, “Come on now, Jay. I apologize for coming at you like that, but you gotta understand where I’m coming from too. I mean, it wasn’t like I was texting her to intentionally disrespect you. I just… I guess I don’t know what I’m doing cause I don’t know what we’re doing. One day, you’re all about me. The next, you’re mad and it’s just business. Then you show up here like everything is all good until it turns sour with this petty Shawnie shit. I can’t keep up with you, shorty.”

  It was one thing for us to take it slow and grow little by little. But it was a whole other thing for her to keep giving me these mixed signals; acting like she was fully removed in the morning then acting like she was all in at night. And while I expected my honesty about it to be well-received, I was completely caught off-guard once I saw Jayla’s face transform into a scowl as she turned the screen of her phone my way to say, “You can’t keep up with me, but I see you had no problem keeping up with all those Instagram comments you replied to in the wee hours of the morning. Getting your little flirt and tease on with all these random girls on the internet like I wasn’t asleep right next to you.”

  Being up in the wee hours of the morning was a symptom of our little argument, going to the internet to do what I’d have to do eventually in responding to my fans instead of tossing and turning like she was. And honestly, what she considered flirting, I considered being friendly - personable. I mean, it was the exact type of shit she encouraged early on since making fans feel special kept them connected.

  So with another sigh, I reminded her, “Jayla, you’re the one who told me to do this; that I was made for it. And now you’re buggin’ cause the shit is really working? Cause I’m actually staying engaged with the audience who’s keeping the money rolling in for the both of us? You know how it is.”

  “I know how it is as your business partner. But as someone you call yourself pursuing? As the person you claim you want more from? I don’t know shit,” she snapped, only making me shake my head as I tossed my locs back and muttered to myself, “So maybe this personal shit is becoming a little too much right now.”

  I wasn’t even sure if she realized she had asked, “What?” out loud. But now that I knew she had heard me, it only felt right for me to give her a full explanation, grabbing her hand and looking her straight in the eyes when I expressed, “I need this money, Jayla. I’m on unpaid leave from my job right now on some stupid shit, so I really can’t fuck this opportunity up. Not for anything.”

  Considering my struggle situations from the past, there was no way in hell I was risking falling right back to square one. But instead of offering any bit of understanding, her hand only went stiff in my hold. “So what are you saying?”

  “I’m saying… if this personal shit is gonna be causing a rift in the business like this, then maybe we should cool it for a bit. Keep it strictly professional until we’re ready to figure things out on this side,” I told her, the words feeling weird coming from my mouth since the personal side was all I really wanted.

  She was all I really wanted.

  But if taking a little break from that to regroup was the move that ensured we’d be able to find our way back to a better space and keep our business shit solid, I was willing to do whatever it took.

  Except, I had apparently gotten it all wrong.

  Jayla popped up from the bed in a fury, snatching last night’s dress from the foot of the bed before exchanging it with her robe as she rattled, “You know what? Maybe the business is too much too. Maybe I should just… give you to one of my colleagues. Since I’m suddenly fucking up your opportunities.”

  My face twisted instantly. “What? You know I didn’t mean it like that, Jayla.”

  She stopped just long enough to say, “The personal shit is going to mess up the business, and I’m the personal shit. Sounds like that’s exactly what you meant, Khalid.” Then she went back to gathering her things, stuffing most of it into her purse as she added, “You really tried to cape like you’re so different, like you weren’t him, yet you’re steady putting up all the same damn red flags. And you know what? I’m not ignoring them this time. I’m no one’s fool anymore.”

  “Jayla, wait…” I called after her, but she was already headed out of the door. And when she stopped in the middle of the hallway, I became a little hopeful until she didn’t even turn around to say, “Have a safe trip back, Khalid. One of my associates will contact you first thing on Monday.” Then she continued toward the elevator, my heart telling me to go after her, but my feet feeling like cement blocks as I wondered, “What the hell just happened?”

  How was it even possible for us to go from what felt like a beef, to being boo’d up in the club, to fuckin’ like we had a point to make, to arguing about Shawnie of all people, and now to this? To nothing? All within the span of twenty-four hours?

  And God forbid we take a look at the seventy-two-hour rollercoaster…

  Shit was a mess all-around. And while I really wasn’t in a rush to get back home now that I wasn’t sure what I was even going home to, the noon check-out time really left me no choice, the decision to drive instead of fly paying off since it gave me some extra time to think. But when I stopped at the gas station for some snacks and took a quick glance at social media, my thoughts turned to guilt once I saw Jayla’s Instagram story post of her in the airport with the caption, “Catch flights. Not feelings.”

  Damn.

  I really fucked this up.

  The drive home was somber as hell, not even a fire playlist able to break up any of the turmoil I felt internally. And honestly, it only made me think about Jayla even harder, think back on the first time I had let her get the aux cord after our little roller skating date.

  When things were good.

  We had come so far since then, I had fallen for her so fast, and now we had… nothing. All because of some terrible misunderstandings and my trash ass circumstances.

  Unfortunately, I didn’t get a chance to implement any real solutions since Shaq was already waiting on my porch when I pulled up. How he knew when I was coming back, I wasn’t sure. But I quickly learned he had been sitting out here much longer than I thought according to the stench that blew my way once he stood up to ask, “No security detail? No paparazzi? What the hell kinda Z-list celebrity are you?”

  Rolling my eyes, I ignored his questions to ask one of my own. “How long have you been sitting out here, man?”

  With a wave of his hand, he insisted, “Ahh, don’t even worry about it, cuz. I was just out here practicing for when I submit my audition tape for that show, Naked and Afraid.”

  My face scrunch
ed with confusion since for one, this wasn’t the wilderness. For two, black people didn’t really fuck with shows like that no matter how much money they got paid to do it. And for three, “But you’re not even naked.”

  “Baby steps, man. I’m training my way up to that,” he explained as I unlocked the front door, tempted to tell him he had to go wash up with the hose out back before he could come inside.

  But instead, I just directed him straight to the bathroom while asking, “Why are you even here? I’m surprised you aren’t at Mila’s.”

  Shaking his head, his voice took a melancholy tone when he replied, “Nah, man. She’s a little upset with me right now.”

  “Damn. You too?” was what I thought. But considering I wasn’t ready to go into details about my similar situation with her big sister, I decided to wait until he got finished getting cleaned up to ask what happened, instead giving him the supplies he needed for a good scrub. And when he went to grab one of the good towels I kept for Jayla, I was quick to exchange it with a second-tier one I wouldn’t mind throwing away when he was done, almost as if I was hopeful she’d actually be back to use it again.

  While Shaq showered, I made myself busy unpacking, the pants from the night before only reminding me of how Jayla had yanked me out of them. And even after I tossed them in the laundry basket, I couldn’t shake the memories, wondering if they’d be the last ones we ever made together.

  Shaq’s return from the shower was right on time, his towel thankfully wrapped around his waist as I tossed him some fresh clothes to put on. And as he started getting dressed in the closet, I finally asked, “Aight. So what happened with you and Mila?”