The Wild, Wild Anybody's Guess: Aloha!

by Jayha Leigh

  “Ianikut.”

  “I am not discussing this, angel.”

  “You’re such a man.”

  “I can be no less.” Indicating the bottle of antacids, he inquired, “How long does it take for these to kick in?”

  “Maybe half an hour,” she said. She looked at the scowl on Ianikut’s face and thought that he was upset about the mess she had made. She immediately started apologizing. “Ianikut, I’m…”

  Ianikut had placed his fingers against her lips. “Don’t you dare apologize…until you’re well enough to take your punishment like a woman.”

  “And just how do you plan on punishing me?”

  “By spanking your ass, angel.”

  “But that’ll hurt.” She pouted.

  “It’s supposed to, but don’t worry, I’ll fuck you better. In future, I shall keep a closer eye on you. I cannot bear it when you hurt in any way.”

  “But…”

  “But nothing,” he said as he drew her into his arms. “Now, go to sleep and dream of me.”

  Aloha was touched and would’ve started crying if Ianikut hadn’t growled for her to cease breaking his heart at once. She did and then turned over, ran her fingers through his hair and demanded, “Ask me to marry you again.”

  Ianikut didn’t know what she was up to. Nevertheless, he complied. “Zhenites' na mne! Marry me.”

  “Da, Ianikut. Yes! Next week if you wish.”

  “Ja ne mogu zhit' bez vas (I can’t live without you). Ya bUdu vsegdA lyubIt' tebyA (I will always love you),” Ianikut declared.

  Ianikut had said as much so many times over the past week that she no longer needed the translation. “Ya tebyA lyublyU (I love you) Ianikut Maksim Aleksandrovich.”

  Then, it was Ianikut who cried and simultaneously broke her heart and repaired it with the magnitude of his love.

  * * * * *

  Aloha woke to the buzzing of her cellular phone. She knew that she was alone in bed or else Ianikut would’ve answered it.

  “Yeah.”

  “Granddaughter, what’s going on?”

  Aloha should’ve known that her grandmother would contact her. She had this freaky accurate ESP thing going. Though her grandmother wasn’t much for talking on the phone, she always called when Aloha was at a crossroads or experiencing a crisis. She knew better than to try to bullshit her grandmother so she jumped right into the meat and potatoes of the issue. “I’m getting married.”

  “Why?” her grandmother inquired.

  “Because Ianikut loves me, Grandmother, and I love him right back.”

  “And the problem would be?”

  “He’s,” she paused, “white.”

  “Hmm,” her grandmother said.

  Aloha wasn’t sure how to interpret her grandmother’s response, although she knew that she wasn’t giving Ianikut up. Older black women tended to distrust white men, and though she could understand why, she understood that her heart beat for Ianikut.

  “I’m not giving him up, Grandmother.”

  “I didn’t expect you to, little girl, which is why I’ll be there in an hour.”

  “What do you mean that you’ll be here in an hour?”

  “I mean that in sixty minutes I shall be outside the home of this Mr. Ianikut M. Aleksandrovich.”

  “How?”

  “Don’t ask questions you don’t want answers to. Now, get your hind parts out of bed and make yourself presentable.”

  * * * * *

  Hanging up the phone, Aloha scrambled out of bed. “Ianikut!” she screamed while scurrying to the bathroom.

  Ianikut was at her side almost instantly. “What is it, angel?” he asked with concern.

  “My grandmother’s on her way over! She’ll be here in an hour! Get dressed, and you have to straighten up the house and make sure none of my panties are hanging about. Oh, damn. And don’t you dare suck any of her blood.”

  “Angel.”

  “I mean it, Ianikut. If you or your brothers touch my grandmother, it will be on.”

  “Angel,” he repeated before taking her toothbrush from her hands and embracing her. “Calm down. Breathe.”

  “But, Ianikut…”

  “Angel, I promise you that no one will touch your grandmother in an inappropriate way and live. The house will be in perfect order by the time your grandmother arrives. Now, run yourself a bubble bath and relax. That is the extent of what I need for you to do,” he said while gently nipping a path from her ear to her neck.

  “But you can’t even make a decent bed,” she moaned.

  “Neither can you,” he retorted.

  “You need to get dressed. You can’t answer the door wearing that.” She swallowed as she scanned his bare torso. “While my grandmother might be impressed, I won’t be amused.”

  “What do you mean ‘might’?” An incensed Ianikut asked. “I am 6’7” of devastating Russian man.”

  “Yeah, and all Grandmother will see is that you’re severely lacking in the melatonin department.”

  “Isn’t she going to notice that anyway?”

  “Yeah, she is, but that doesn’t mean that she gets to ogle my stuff. Now go cover up all of that devastation, before I’m tempted to kick my grandmother down a flight of stairs, if I catch her looking at you too long.”

  Regardless of Ianikut’s decree to relax, Aloha set a new world record for completing her toilet. She didn’t know how or when he did it, but Ianikut had the room looking as if it was getting ready to be featured in a home interiors magazine. She was throwing on some lip gloss when the doorbell rang. She was in the process of sprinting down the stairs when she was stopped by Ianikut’s warning growl. “Angel, there’s no need to run. Please be careful of your ankle,” he said as he scooped her up and carried her down the stairs.

  “You’re going to spoil me,” she protested.

  “That is my plan,” he said, before he answered the door.

  * * * * *

  Ianikut knew that Aloha’s grandmother held sway, but he wasn’t sure what to expect. Mrs. Sojourner Carrington was what he imagined Silana would be like in another fifty years.

  Bowing to her, he invited her in. “Please come in, Mrs. Carrington.”

  Looking the young man up and down, she nodded her head and entered.

  “Would you care for something to drink?”

  “No, thank you. What I would like is to see my granddaughter,” she answered in a tone that brooked no nonsense.

  He escorted her to the living room and watched as Aloha ran across the room and practically launched herself in the older woman’s arms. Concerned that his angel would accidentally knock the lady to the floor in her enthusiasm, he ran over to steady them but realized that his assistance wasn’t required. Sojourner Carrington was a tough old bird.

  “Grandmommy! Grandmommy!” Aloha screamed as she was enveloped by strength and warmth. “Why did you come?”

  “Who else should come? It’s for certain that your parents cannot help you. They know about putting on facades ‑‑ or fronting as you kids would say ‑‑ but they know nothing about love. That’s why I’m here.”

  Ianikut was about to leave, so the two women could have privacy, when he was summoned. “Little boy, sit down.”

  He sat, although he bristled at being called a little boy.

  Aloha was still curled up in the older woman’s ample bosom.

  “Explain yourself.”

  “I love her,” he simply said.

  “And why have you dishonored my granddaughter by taking liberties that should be reserved for a husband?”

  Mrs. Carrington didn’t mince words.

  “Grandmother!” Aloha gasped. “That’s not fair, and it’s not correct! He didn’t take advantage of me. He only did what I allowed!” she said as she jumped up full of indignation.

  “Little girl, don’t take that tone with me. I know what you’ve allowed this man to do and I suspect you enjoyed every second of your debauchery. Now, sit down, so that this boy c
an answer my questions,” Mrs. Carrington demanded.

  “I will not allow you to,” she said, before Ianikut was at her side.

  Kissing her, he bent and whispered, “Angel, calm down.”

  “Ma’am, I did take advantage of Aloha. I wanted Aloha and so I persuaded, tempted, and finally bullied her to my side. At first, I was merely intrigued, but then, I fell in love with her. And now, it’s she that holds all the power in this relationship. I’ll give her anything she desires unless her wants or needs place her in danger…or takes her from my side.”

  “Those are pretty words. Men have never been short on pretty words when they want sex.”

  “What are you asking, ma’am?”

  “When’s the wedding?”

  “As soon as I can drag her beautiful self down the aisle.”

  “Little girl, you giving this boy trouble?”

  “Yep.”

  “Good. Now, Mr. Aleksandrovich if there isn’t a wedding after carrying on with my granddaughter, I guarantee that you won’t enjoy the ramifications of hurting my baby or pissing me off. I might be a little older than you, but you shouldn’t underestimate me.”

  “Nothing will get in the way of me marrying her.”

  “Grandmother, you didn’t even look at my ring,” Aloha accused, wanting to show it off.

  “I saw that rock, and you deserve all eight of those carats, but I’m interested in seeing the wedding band that goes with it,” she said as she threw Ianikut a look that promised bad things should he fuck up.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Aloha finally spent quality time with the plasma after promising to marry Ianikut. She contacted Atlanta and invited her over as Ianikut had growled out a hell no when she mentioned going to Reign’s house for a movie fest with the Posse and their circle of friends. He was still pissed about the unknown male that he scented on her. When she gave her patented ‘motherfucker please’ look, he admitted that he wouldn’t be comfortable with her being in the proximity of so many unattached males probably ever, but definitely not until the ‘I do’s’ were exchanged. Ianikut was possessive, but unlike many men, he was honest about it. She couldn’t mind all that much. After all, he had one hundred three inches of plasma in the den.

  * * * * *

  Ianikut didn’t object to Atlanta coming over, after all she’d been to his home several times, and his brothers practically lived at Evil Twins. Atlanta wasn’t the reason that his brothers were standing sentry at various points of the property ‑‑ the berserker was. The berserker was a power unto himself. Regardless of how refined and laid back he seemed to be, power recognized power and he knew that the berserker was capable of unbelievable carnage if he was so moved. If Aloha hadn’t been there, it wouldn’t have been a problem, but Aloha was there, and it was his duty to protect her from any unknowns. Not that he thought that Steele would harm her; it was the fact that Aloha wasn’t technically his yet. Until such time, he trusted no man around her ‑‑ married or not.

  He might’ve felt ridiculous, if he didn’t know how jealous both Iain and the berserker were over their women, who were theirs by their own law and the laws of the state. Ianikut knew there was no way in hell that either man would allow their ladies to visit his home without being at their sides. Though Iain was relatively easygoing, the blond was still incensed that he retained his position of being Atlanta’s second-best friend.

  When the doorbell announced Atlanta’s presence, only his inhuman speed allowed him to get to the door before Aloha. He would soon have to teach her the rules that governed their lives. Shoving her behind him, he opened the door noting with grim satisfaction that the berserker faced a similar dilemma. When Ianikut opened the door, Atlanta would’ve run straight to Aloha, if Steele hadn’t had a death grip on her arm. While Atlanta scowled at him, the berserker ignored her attempts to free herself from his clutches and merely met Ianikut’s gaze, awaiting an invitation to cross his threshold.

  “Won’t you come in?”

  “That is a question, not an invitation,” Steele replied, still not moving from his stance nor relaxing his grip on Atlanta. Ianikut smiled. Obviously the berserker was no fool. Aloha’s long-suffering sigh went in perfect tandem with Atlanta’s impatient foot-tapping.

  “You are welcome to enter, Eiŕikr Bastille Magnussen.”

  “Thank you, and I accept your invitation, Ianikut Maksim Aleksandrovich,” he replied. It wasn’t his full name that caused Ianikut to reconsider the power of the berserker but the use of his title. The berserker had whispered his title softly so neither Atlanta nor Aloha heard it. Ianikut went still surer than ever that the berserker would make the worst kind of enemy.

  Atlanta and Aloha had both had enough of their posturing. “If you two are finished with the ass-sniffing routine, Atlanta and I have sports to watch on the plasma.”

  “Yeah,” Atlanta agreed and breezed by him without so much as a ‘hi, I hate you,’ and ran to Aloha as if they’d been separated for centuries rather than a few days.

  Aloha had at least acknowledged the berserker ‑‑ albeit briefly. She threw a greeting his way before grabbing Atlanta’s hand and summarily dragged her past the two startled and angry alpha men.

  “Well, I guess we’ve been dismissed,” Ianikut said.

  “It seems that way,” Steele lamented. “Do you think that they will be gone for long?”

  “Unfortunately, yes. I made the grave mistake of tempting Aloha with my big screen plasma. I’m starting to think that my plasma is the sole reason that she allows me to keep her company,” Ianikut stated.

  “Where are your brothers?” Steele asked without preamble.

  “Where would you like for them to be?”

  “Away from Atlanta.”

  “Done,” Ianikut assured him, directing his brothers away from the women, since the berserker wouldn’t be in proximity to Aloha.

  “I guess you should have a seat. Would you like a drink?” Ianikut asked.

  “The seat will be more than enough,” Steele answered.

  Ianikut showed him to the living room where his brothers lounged and took a seat across from him. Both men looked forlorn as if neither could bear the brief separation from their respective women. The two alpha men sat in silence for fifteen minutes, before the ringing doorbell brought them out of their respective reveries.

  * * * * *

  Ianikut wasn’t expecting additional company, so he went on immediate alert when the bell rang.

  He didn’t get a chance to get to it, before the pounding began…then the shouts. Smiling, he opened the door to admit the rest of the Posse. He was amused but not surprised to see the gaggle of women on his doorstep. Even without his sensitive hearing, he clearly heard Reign’s demand to invite them in.

  The first wave of the Posse ‑‑ Silana, Indy, and Jack ‑‑ entered sedately. Silana exhibited her usual grace; Indy her usual calm; and Jack her usual alertness. The second wave of the Posse ‑‑ Zuri, Victorious, and Reign ‑‑ virtually bum-rushed their way into his home. It was a good thing he possessed preternatural speed else he would’ve been road kill.

  “Imax! Move your ass. Aloha’s been extolling us with stories about the plasma and I’ve brought my copy of The Trilogy,” Reign whooped.

  Ianikut smiled at the sight of the woman wearing a hat that came straight out of a Dr. Seuss book. She was practically hopping up and down with excitement.

  The palpable enthusiasm of the Posse even brought a smile to Steele’s lips. “Are not all movies that have three parts considered trilogies?” Steele asked.

  From the look of disgust on Reign’s countenance, it was obvious she considered the question idiotic. He knew that she was a woman who took her movies seriously. “Steele, there are movies that have three parts, then there’s ‘the’ trilogy. Some amateurs will try and convince you that there are many trilogies, but there’s only one ‑‑ the Die Hard trilogy,” she said solemnly.

  “What about Star Wars?”

  “Listen
well, Padiwan. Star Wars, though a damn fine series, is a sexology since Lucas added the three prequels,” she explained, while the rest of the girls laughed at Reign’s reference to Steele as a young Jedi-in-training.

  “Yeah, well, not everyone lives in their mama’s basement with a freaky collection of comic books and sci-fi movies.” Zuri sighed.

  “You’re just jealous,” Reign threw back as she yelled for the twins.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Like any event the Posse was involved in, there was a lot of laughter, trash-talking and telling it. It was the beginning of a long day, but that’s the way the Posse had planned it. The women made themselves comfortable, before Silana advised Ianikut to be on the look out for Iain and Hannes who were en route with the provisions.

  Upon hearing Hannes’s name, both Steele and Ianikut went still.

  “Who is Hannes?” both men inquired simultaneously.

  “Hannes is my friend,” Zuri responded softly. “I can go,” she said, before Ianikut interrupted her.

  “Zuri, you will never say such nonsense. You are always welcome in our home. I just get antsy about strange males around my woman.”

  “As do I,” Steele said.

  “We’ve checked him out,” Reign added.

  “And when she says that she checked him out, she means it literally. I shudder thinking about how many laws she possibly broke.” Silana said.

  “I said I was sorry.” Reign pouted.

  “Yeah, but you also said that you’d do it again,” Zuri said.

  “Hannes is alright,” Jack said.

  Both men knew that being described as ‘alright’ was high praise from the normally taciturn woman.

  * * * * *

  Both Iain’s and Hannes’s trucks were loaded down with enough food to end world hunger. It took the males several trips to bring it all in because they had zero help from the Posse who had spotted Aloha’s ring and started wreaking their special brand of havoc.

  “Careful, before you put someone’s eye out with that!” Reign screamed.

  “Grandmother thought it was beautiful.”