Always & Forever

by Chantel Rhondeau

  After locking the door, he crossed over to her. “You don’t need to worry anymore. Everything’s going to be okay.”

  She hugged him tightly. “I wish I could believe that,” she whispered and turned toward the bedroom.

  Zach followed behind her and watched as she climbed into bed. She was so fragile. He would protect her, no matter the cost.

  “Are you getting in bed?” she asked.

  Zach nodded. He stripped down to his boxers and placed the tire iron on the floor within easy reach, just in case.

  He climbed into the bed, and Lilly returned to his embrace when he reached for her. As though he’d been designed to hold her, Lilly’s feminine curves fit perfectly against him.

  Her breathing quieted as they lay there, and her body relaxed. Every sound the house made set Zach on alert, but having Lilly curled up against him was worth the fear.

  So much time passed while Zach drifted, enjoying being with her, he thought she’d fallen asleep.

  “Do you think it’s Charles out there?” she asked quietly, startling him. “It didn’t sound like him, but the voice was really low. Do you think he’s the person who attacked me all along?”

  Zach stilled his pounding heart and thought about her question. “I don’t think it’s him. If Charles faked his own death and took that money, he probably left the country. Why risk returning?” Perhaps Charles had come back for Lilly. Maybe he wanted her back in his control. Zach squeezed Lilly closer against him. He would never let that happen. “It might have been a prank,” he said, trying to think of a way to ease her fears, “but I don’t think we should take any chances.”

  “Who would pull a prank that horrible?”

  “I don’t know,” he admitted, kissing her forehead. “But the person left when I got here, so maybe they weren’t serious and were just trying to scare you.”

  “It sounded a lot like the voice I remember from the night I was attacked.” She stroked his hair as she talked. “What if that man is coming back to kill me?”

  The feel of her against him, her gentle hand touching him, was the best thing Zach ever experienced. Things would be perfect if he could somehow ease her fears, make her feel secure.

  “I won’t let anyone near you.” He returned her tentative caresses. “Maybe the voice sounded familiar to you because of your fear, but it really wasn’t. Maybe it got all mixed up in your mind.”

  She sighed. “Well, that’s terrific.” Her leg slipped over his and she threw her arm around his chest. She laughed a little and shook her head. “I’m becoming whiny and paranoid. I hope I don’t scare you off.”

  Zach smiled in the darkness. It was an exquisite kind of torture, to be this close to her and refrain from doing anything more than hold her, but a torture he gladly endured.

  He dropped a kiss onto her forehead. “You’d never scare me off. I like the feel of this too much. I might become addicted.”

  She laughed. “I can deal with an addict.”

  Zach stayed awake for a long time after Lilly fell asleep. The sound of her deep, even breaths and occasional soft snore lulled him closer to sleep but he forced himself awake. He cradled her tighter against him. Zach didn’t want to go to his own home and sleep alone tomorrow. He never wanted to be in bed without her again.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Lilly woke slowly Wednesday morning to the sound of the shower turning on. She could get used to Zach being around the house. A smile crossed her face, but then she remembered the reason Zach was there.

  What would today bring? She was half-afraid to leave her house and go to work. What if the caller waited for an opportunity to get her alone? Maybe Zach would follow her and watch until she made it safely inside Woodbridge Manor.

  She stretched and opened her eyes. The room was much lighter than it should be. What time was it? She looked at her clock.

  Nine o’clock? She was late for work.

  Lilly rolled out of bed and hurried into the hallway. She pounded on the bathroom door. “Zach! I really need to get in there.”

  “So come on in,” he called over the sound of the water.

  She yanked the door open, making a beeline for the medicine cabinet to brush her teeth. Then, Lilly fumbled through the drawer before remembering her hairbrush sat on the nightstand.

  The water in the shower turned off and Lilly hurried into the hallway, closing the door behind her. She dressed in record time and ripped the brush through her hair to force the tangles out. Static crackled around her and the curls turned into a puffy mess around her face.

  Surely Margaret would call any minute. Lilly had never been late before. She hoped Zach hurried; she needed to get back in the bathroom.

  Zach strolled in a few minutes later, his shirt unbuttoned. “Do you have an extra toothbrush by chance?”

  “There’s a whole pack in the hall closet,” she answered and tried to push past him.

  He caught her around the waist and kissed her cheek. “What’s the hurry?”

  “What’s the hurry? I’m supposed to be at work. Why didn’t you wake me?”

  “Wake you? I turned the alarm off. You needed the sleep.”

  This is your fantasy man, Lilly. You spent the night in his arms. Be nice. “What I need is to make it to work on time.”

  He squeezed her waist. “Relax, you’re not late. I called Grandma before I got in the shower.”

  “Oh, well, that’s okay...I guess.” At least she had time to get ready.

  Zach released her and went to the hall closet. He found the package of toothbrushes from the dollar store and returned to the bathroom with a green one in his hand.

  She followed him and watched in bemusement as he opened the medicine chest and helped himself to her toothpaste.

  Once finished, he turned to her. “Now, I can give you a real kiss good morning.”

  Lilly’s delighted laugh changed to a small moan as his clever tongue went to work inside her mouth. Zach kissed her as if they were lovers, reunited after a long separation.

  “Good morning to you, too,” she said when he released her.

  Zach grinned. “Why don’t you get ready and we’ll figure out what we’re doing today.”

  “Well, I don’t know what you’re doing, but I need to get my hiney to work.”

  “Personally, I love your hiney,” he said, “but it doesn’t have to go to work until Monday. I thought we’d drive up to Portland and get you—”

  “What do you mean Monday?” she interrupted.

  “Oh, right. I forgot to tell you. I told Grandma you wouldn’t be in ‘til Monday.”

  Lilly sputtered for a moment, unable to think of anything to say. “Why would you do that?” she managed to ask.

  “We have a lot to get done.” He shrugged. “Grandma’s fine with it. She said she’d see you Saturday at the party.”

  Lilly chewed on the inside of her lip, trying not to explode at his high-handed manner. Zach thought he was being helpful.

  He continued to speak, unaware of her mounting anger. “After we call that detective in New York, let’s head for Portland.”

  Lilly counted slowly to ten in her head, breathing deeply. “What are we doing in Portland?”

  “You said you didn’t have any more dresses. You’ll need one for Saturday, right?” He grinned. “I thought we’d go shopping.”

  “But I don’t want to go shopping.”

  “Don’t worry.” He patted her shoulder. “I’m buying.”

  Lilly’s hand balled into a fist. Of all the arrogant, cocky, stupid things to say. He knew how she felt about that.

  “Zach, can I ask you a question?”

  “Sure.” Her tone must have alerted him, because Zach finally looked apprehensive.

  “Did we have a conversation last night that I don’t remember?”

  “I don’t think so,” Zach said slowly.

  “I don’t think so either.” She folded her arms across her chest. “So where’d you get the idea I’m looking for a
man to manage my life?”

  Zach’s mouth hung open for a second. “Come on, Lilly. That’s not what I’m doing.”

  “Oh, really? You decided I don’t need to work. Apparently, according to you, I need a shopping spree. You are going to pay. This will happen after I do the other things you said to do.” She glared at him. “Do I get to pick out my own dress or are you choosing that too?”

  Zach threw his arms in the air and backed out of the bathroom. “I’m going down to get some coffee and donuts. We’ll talk about this after we’ve both calmed down.”

  Seconds later, the front door slammed shut. Lilly sagged against the counter, holding back tears. She wondered if he would return. Part of her wanted to believe Zach only tried to help, that he didn’t want to control her like Charles had. The other part of her was afraid all men were the same.

  Becoming a submissive puppet who allowed a man to pull her strings again was unacceptable, and it felt like Zach tried to take charge of her life this morning. How could she be certain he wasn’t the puppeteer Charles had been?

  However, Zach had been incredibly kind and understanding while she broke down last night. Lilly could never imagine Charles being so gentle or caring toward her.

  She shuddered, remembering the terror she felt upon seeing the shadowy figure at the sliding door. She hadn’t been that scared since the night of her attack. When Zach knocked on the front door, she was certain someone would burst through at any moment to hurt her.

  Discovering Zach stood on the other side, being in his arms while he soothed her, protected her—she had never felt so safe or cherished.

  Then again, people could hide their true nature, at least for a while.

  ***

  Damn redheads. Zach grabbed his credit card back from the cashier at Sally’s coffee shop and shoved it into his wallet. It was true what people claimed about a redhead’s temper. What the hell was wrong with her? After last night, Zach thought they were closer. Would it be so horrible to take a few days off and spend them with him?

  Maybe he should have told her his real motive for getting out of town. But what if it freaked her out all over again? If someone really was after Lilly, especially if it was the same man from before or Charles, Zach wanted her out of reach. A trip to Portland held an air of legitimacy; she really did need a new dress. Besides, it would be fun to take her out to dinner, have a real date with her.

  Apparently, he still had a lot to learn about women.

  He juggled the tray of coffee while he grabbed the car keys out of his front pocket. Holding the little sack of fresh donuts between his chin and chest, he unlocked the car door. His phone beeped as he slipped into the front seat.

  Zach set the coffee onto the passenger seat, placing the donuts next to it before looking at his phone. Great, a text message from Lilly. Maybe she wanted him to stay away. He opened the message with no little trepidation.

  “Please come back. We need to talk.”

  Zach leaned his head back. That didn’t sound good. What would he do if she wanted to break off their relationship?

  Their relationship. That thought hit Zach, momentarily taking his breath away. Zach wanted to be with Lilly. Not just as a casual date and definitely not as a decoy. He hadn’t been able to stop thinking about her since they met. For the first time in his life, Zach thought he might be with a woman worth a commitment from him.

  He dated occasionally since Victoria’s death, but he wouldn’t exactly call that a relationship. Jennifer had been nothing more than an occasional sex partner and someone to go to fancy parties with. They’d quit seeing each other when Jennifer found a steady boyfriend last year. No big deal—for either of them.

  He didn’t want that with Lilly. He couldn’t imagine going weeks without seeing her. Hell, he didn’t want to be away from her for a few hours.

  Zach drove quickly back to her house. He did his juggling act again with the coffee and donuts and knocked on the door with his foot. When he left, he wasn’t sure Lilly would let him back in, but he locked the door anyway. No way would he leave her in an unlocked house with some maniac after her.

  The door opened and Lilly looked him over before turning to walk into the kitchen. He couldn’t tell what she was thinking, but at least she let him in.

  Zach closed and locked the door before following her. “I bought regular coffee. Didn’t know what else you liked.”

  “Thank you.” Lilly took one of the foam cups and sipped the hot liquid, perching on the stool next to him. “I need to let you know about a decision I made while you were gone.” She looked at him, and Zach saw fear in her eyes.

  He relaxed his shoulders and tried to appear nonthreatening. Whatever she planned to tell him, she thought he wouldn’t like it. And she was afraid of him. Zach prayed she wasn’t about to kick him out of her life. “What’s your decision?”

  “I know you think we should call Detective Spalding, but I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

  That was all she wanted to talk about? Zach feared she planned to throw him out of her life or maybe tell him they would never go to Portland together. He reached for her shoulder, intending to reassure her that he didn’t care whether they called the detective.

  Lilly flinched, leaning away from him.

  He dropped his hand to his lap, wondering what possessed him to do that. He knew better than touching her when she was so tense.

  She cleared her throat. “I think it’s best not to involve Spalding right now. What if it’s just a prank, like you said?”

  “Lilly, we need to get something straight between us.” Zach turned in his seat to look at her more directly.

  She shrank back further from him, almost in danger of falling from her stool.

  Zach looked into her eyes, hoping she would understand the truth of his words. “I will never, ever hit you. Never. Do you understand?”

  Lilly nodded. Some of the wariness left her, and she sat a little straighter.

  “You’re in charge of your life, not me. I don’t hit people who disagree with me.”

  “I’m not used to men thinking I can make decisions.” Her eyes shifted away from his.

  “I know that, but I’m not your father, and I’m definitely not Charles.”

  “Sometimes it’s hard to believe not everyone is like them.” She reached out tentatively and placed her hand in his.

  “I understand that. Well, I’m trying to understand.” Zach squeezed her hand gently. “That’s not to say I won’t get angry and lose my temper, but I’ll never hurt you.”

  “I know you want to go on this trip together, and maybe all you want is to spend time with me.” Lilly shrugged and grabbed a sugar-covered donut from the bag, not meeting his eyes. “I don’t know how to tell for sure you aren’t like Charles, and I’m afraid to give up any of the control I’ve finally won over my life.”

  Zach cleared his throat, aware of how much it must have cost her to admit that. In a way, it showed she already trusted him, at least a little bit. “I’m not Charles,” he said slowly, “and I didn’t mean for you to feel as though I wanted to control you.”

  Lilly said nothing, putting a small piece of donut into her mouth.

  How could he convince her? “I know you’ve had a hard life, and I understand what you’re saying about being controlled.”

  He wanted to reach out and hug her. Maybe if he showed her enough love, she’d believe in him. He knew that would be a mistake, though, one sure to drive her away forever. Instead, he ate his own donut to keep his hands busy.

  “I don’t know how to reassure you, except through my actions.” He shook his head, his stomach twisting with disgust when he thought of what Charles did to her. “I would never be capable of doing what he did.”

  “I want to believe that,” she whispered.

  He took a deep breath. The time had come to explain his life to her. “You’ve suffered more hurt than anyone should have to endure. I want to tell you about my life, and maybe you’ll un
derstand things better.” He took a shaky breath. Opening these old wounds and examining them in detail wouldn’t be easy. Lilly had the courage to tell him her life, though. He owed her the same courtesy. “You aren’t the only one who suffered in a terrible relationship, although yours was worse.”

  “I don’t understand.” Lilly’s hand lightly touched his forearm. “Not Victoria, surely. She was perfect. Who was so horrible? Someone you dated after her?”

  She thought Victoria was perfect? Zach shook his head, remembering Victoria’s mean streak and cold manner. All he’d wanted was a family, a wife to love as much as Granddad loved Grandma.

  Almost from the beginning, Victoria claimed he had all the romantic sensibilities and sexual finesse of a block of wood. He’d felt horrible the night of their wedding when she said she couldn’t abide his touch. Zach now understood the reason she discouraged his lovemaking, but at the time he’d felt as though he were less than a man. She only had to avoid him and talk her way out of her marital duties that first year. After he found out about her relationship with Curtis, Zach never touched her again.

  He thought about the damaged woman sitting beside him. He ached to help her heal from what her past had done to her. Even with her past, Lilly’s heat was a blazing fire compared to Victoria’s iciness. Last night in the hallway had been the most exciting sexual encounter of Zach’s life, though it stopped almost before it began. Zach had a feeling once Lilly got over her fear, he would never have to endure excuses from her as to why she didn’t want to make love.

  “Zach, are you alright? Are you going to tell me?”

  At the sound of her sweet voice, Zach looked at her. A coating of sugar covered her mouth from the donut she’d eaten. He wished he dared lean over and suck the sweetness from her full lips.

  “I tried to tell you this last night before Mother called.” He paused. “I was never in love with Victoria, and she certainly never loved me.”

  Lilly snatched her hand back from his. “You didn’t love your wife?”

  That knowledge obviously disgusted her. Zach took a moment to gather his thoughts. It was his turn to sweat it out while he explained his past. Lilly had a real romantic streak. Would she understand?