by Marla Monroe
She hoped they would take the hint and do the dishes. She’d cleaned up behind herself as she cooked, but there were still some to be washed, including the ones they’d eaten from. It was only fair that if she was going to cook, they should clean up afterwards. With that thought, Celina curled her feet underneath her as she sat down on the couch. The fire was a welcome warmth from the surrounding cooler air. At least while she had been cooking, the stove had kept her warm.
Once she’d finished the milk, Celina set the empty glass on the end table and stared into the fire, wondering what she was going to do when the baby came. How could she possibly manage taking care of a baby by herself? She really didn’t think that Abe or Russell, for that matter, really wanted her and a child around. They were obviously still hurting from the loss of their families. It really wasn’t fair to them for her to hang around once she was well enough to live on her own. All their talk about it not being safe for her to live on her own didn’t hide the fact that they didn’t want her either.
“Let’s go look for some clothes that might fit you.” Abe’s deep voice startled her.
“Okay.” She stood up and followed him back up the stairs and down the long hall to the last room at the end of the hall.
When he opened the door, it was to find an overly large room with a huge bed in the center. The matching bedroom furniture was in need of a good dusting, but it looked to be expensive and well made. A small sitting area was off to one side with a couch and two chairs.
Abe disappeared through one of the doors on one side of the room. Celina followed him to find herself inside a massive walk-in closet. It was overflowing with clothes. He rummaged through them ’til he found what he was looking for.
“I moved all the clothes I found around the place into this room in case I needed them later.” He indicated with his hand a section of the area. “This is where the women’s clothes start. You can search through and find whatever will fit you. Then look through the shoes. You need another pair of boots, if there are any that will fit.”
She nodded but didn’t move. He finally grunted and eased past her. She felt his body brush along her back. A small shudder rumbled down her back. What was it about him that sent her libido into overdrive? He was gruff, rude at times, and obviously didn’t like her much. Shaking her head, she walked over to the women’s clothes and began going through them to see what would fit.
Thirty minutes later, she emerged from the closet with an arm full of clothes and a pair of boots that fit perfectly. She stopped in her tracks when she saw Abe sitting on one of the chairs waiting for her. He slowly stood up before closing the distance between them with long, sure strides. He relieved her of the lamp first then took the clothes from her arms.
“There are other things in the dresser. Go through the drawers and see what you can find.” Setting the lamp on the dresser, he carried the clothes and boots from the room.
Celina assumed he was taking them to her room and began opening drawers to see what she could liberate from the dusty piece of furniture. Much to her delight, she found several warm sets of pajamas as well as panties and bras. She hadn’t had a bra that actually fit in weeks. No doubt she would need a larger one by the time the baby came.
After taking what she needed, she gathered it up and headed for the door. She couldn’t help but wonder why Abe hadn’t taken this room for his own. Maybe it was just too big and reminded him of what he had lost. She could totally understand that reasoning. She missed her husband. They’d had their problems, but she had loved him. All couples went through hard times, and considering the world they had found themselves in, they had managed a relatively happy marriage.
Once inside her bedroom, she dropped her new things on the bed and began refolding them as she tucked them into the dresser along with the overly large T-shirts for sleeping. She noticed that Abe had left the boots in front of the closet door. She hung up the three dresses she’d found in her size along with the pants and jeans then tucked the boots in the closet as well.
“How are you doing?” Russell poked his head through the doorway from the hall.
“Hey. I just finished putting everything away. What are you up to?”
“I was wondering if you want to play a game of checkers. I have the board set up downstairs.”
Celina smiled. That sounded like fun to her. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d played.
“I’d love to. I’m rusty though. You’ll have to be patient.” She smiled and let him lead her through the door and down the stairs.
“It’s just checkers, not chess. There’s no real thinking behind it,” he teased.
“There is if you want to win, and I plan on winning.” She gave him her haughtiest look.
Russell surprised her by bursting out laughing. He indicated one of the chairs at the small makeshift game table he had set up in front of the fire. The board was already set up for a game. It looked as if she would have the white pieces. She looked around but didn’t see Abe anywhere.
“Where is Abe?”
“He went out to check on the animals. Said it’s going to snow later tonight.” Russell settled into his chair and looked up at her expectantly. “You get to go first.”
They had just gotten into their game when the door across the room opened, letting in a rush of cold air. Abe stepped in after stomping off his boots just outside the door. After closing and bolting the door, he shrugged out of his outerwear and hung it up. He walked toward them and stepped in front of the fireplace, holding his hands out to the flickering flames.
“Everything okay out there?” Russell asked as he studied the board.
“Fine.”
Celina almost sighed out loud at the clipped answer. He didn’t seem to want to interact with them most of the time. She was surprised that he had even come back inside so soon. If the weather hadn’t been so cold, she doubted he would have. As much as that bothered her, what bothered her even more was that he seemed so lost and empty sometimes. It was almost as if he didn’t know how to communicate anymore. She struggled to think of something to say to him, but nothing came to mind.
“Your move.” Russell drew her attention back to the game.
“Who’s winning?” Abe’s deep voice sounded almost hoarse from disuse.
“I am, of course,” she said with a laugh.
“I’m just letting her win so she’ll make lunch.” Russell grinned at her.
“She doesn’t have to cook if she doesn’t want to.” Abe scowled at the other man.
“Don’t worry, Abe. I like to cook, and he’s losing because I’m just better than him.”
Russell gave her a mock scowl that had her almost giggling. When she looked up, the expression on Abe’s face almost broke her heart. Then it was gone and she could almost believe she had imagined it. For a few seconds, he’d looked at them as if he wanted to be included in their teasing. His eyes held a longing so deep it should have taken him to his knees, but then it was gone and the gruff stranger was back with his almost empty stare. It made her shiver to see such a difference in an instant.
Abe turned and walked out of the room. It took all of her strength to keep from getting up and following him. The need that had been in his eyes had nearly broken her heart. She looked over at Russell and realized he was watching her with a curious expression on his face.
“Okay, Russell. Prepare to lose.” Celina refocused on the game.
Fifteen minutes later, she took the winning piece from him and laughed when he pouted.
“I better get started on lunch. Do you have any preferences for dinner tonight?” she asked him.
“Naw. Anything you cook will be good. I’ll clean up this. I expect a rematch tomorrow.”
She chuckled and agreed before walking into the kitchen. It didn’t take her long to throw together a quick meal. Then she started the prep for soup for dinner. She had just browned the meat and set it aside when Abe walked into the room. She continued what she was doing as he sat do
wn at the table.
“Is Russell on his way or should I call him?”
“He’s on his way. He went to wash up.”
She glanced over her shoulder at him before washing her hands at the sink and joining him at the table. He passed the plate of sandwiches to her before dipping into the jar of pickles.
“I can’t believe you started without me.” Russell’s huffed out breath drew a smile to her face.
“Should have gotten here on time. Better hope we left enough for you.” Celina bit her lip to keep from laughing.
They quickly ate, leaving nothing but a half-empty jar of pickles behind. Russell volunteered to wash the dishes while she continued working on dinner. By the time she had the soup simmering on the stove and the biscuit dough ready to cut, she was alone in the kitchen. She wondered over to the window and stared sightlessly through it as she thought about Abe and how much he seemed to want more than what he had.
Celina gave a half laugh at that thought. They all wanted more than what they had. Each of them had lost their other half and had to cope without them. It wasn’t lost on her that both men probably deep down resented her a little bit because she was alive and their wives and families weren’t. She could just about say the same thing about them, except that they had saved her and given her baby a chance at life.
She ran her hand over her slightly rounded abdomen. She figured her child would be born sometime around the end of February or the beginning of March. Of course with everything that had happened in the last few weeks, she wasn’t real sure what month it was now. If she gave birth toward the end of winter, then by the end of spring, she could possibly talk them into letting her live in one of the cabins. She grinned sadly. A few months of living with a screaming baby would surely give her the edge she would need to get them to agree.
Coming back to the present, she noticed how dark it was getting outside. Heavy clouds were building up, supporting Abe’s claim there would be snow soon. She turned back to the stove and checked the soup before rubbing her hands up and down her arms and returning to the great room where the fire was. Both men sat in chairs on either side of the couch.
“You were right, Abe. It looks like snow out there.” She settled herself on the couch.
“It’s going to be a bad one.” Abe stretched in the chair but didn’t get up.
“Do you want help with the cows after dinner?” Russell asked.
“Wouldn’t turn it down. It will go faster with two of us.”
“Is there anything I can do?” she asked.
“Stay inside. Don’t need you catching cold out there.” Abe didn’t look in her direction. “How long until dinner’s ready?”
“It should be ready in another hour if you want to eat soon. I imagine it will be dark outside anyway. Why don’t you see to the animals first while there’s still some light?”
“She’s got a point, Abe. It will be easier if we go ahead before it gets completely dark.” Russell leaned forward in his chair.
Abe sighed and stood up. “Let’s go. We need to bring some wood in on the way back. I’m not sure how cold it will actually get, but we’re in for a good amount of snow.”
As they bundled up to go outside, Celina wondered what was going on inside of Abe’s head. He’d looked reluctant to move and yet he’d been the one to want to take care of the animals as early in the day as possible. She didn’t know enough about either man to try to understand them, but she wanted to. They were going to be living with each other for the next few months, so knowing more about them would make things a lot easier in the long run. One thing marriage to her husband had taught her was to learn everything she could about another person in order to avoid their triggers.
Triggers had a habit of blowing up on you if you weren’t careful. Celina had every intention of being careful.
Chapter Six
Abe smothered a curse as he banged his hand against the gate, trying to get the fucking latch back on it. He was glad Russell had pushed to go ahead and take care of the animals early. Normally he would have been out there right after lunch anyway, but the last twenty-four hours had taken a toll on him. For nearly eight years he’d been alone, and after the first year, had managed to close his memories off for the most part. All it had taken was one day for Celina to open the Pandora’s box of his past to wreak havoc in his world.
Her smiles ate at the chains he’d placed around his heart as her beauty awakened another part of him he hadn’t really paid much attention to in years. It disgusted him that he would even think about her in that way when she was a new widow and expecting another man’s child. What did that make him?
“Got the horses taken care of. Need help out here?” Russell was shouting over the wind that had begun to pick up.
“Cows are fine for the night. We’ll need to see about them in the morning if it snows much by then.” He looked up at the heavy clouds that almost seemed to undulate as he watched. “Let’s carry a few logs up to the porch before we go back inside.”
Russell followed him out to where he chopped wood all during the summer in preparation for winter. They made several trips each before calling it a night and heading inside. As soon as he had hung up his coat and hat, Abe walked over to the hearth and shared the warmth with the other man. They didn’t say anything, just stood there letting the fire warm their frozen bodies. He could hear noises coming from the kitchen that told him Celina was in there finishing up dinner. That knowledge seemed to settle him some, deep inside.
“How far are we from a town or city that might still have some things in their stores?” Russell asked out of the blue.
“Huh?” He looked over at the other man. “Why?”
“I think that if we get a clear day, one of us needs to go and see if we can find any baby things we might need before we can’t go anywhere.”
“Fuck.” He didn’t want to think about that.
Thinking about her bearing a child sent chills down his spine. He didn’t know a damn thing about birthing a baby, and he didn’t want to picture her with one.
“There’s a small town about two-hour’s drive from here.” He sighed and shook his head. “I’m going to go wash up before dinner.”
With that, he walked off, leaving Russell in front of the fireplace. He was sure the other man thought him to be heartless where the woman was concerned, but he didn’t want to think about her that way right now. He was still trying to adjust to her even being there. Hell, he wasn’t quite resigned to Russell living there yet.
Abe liked Russell. He’d worked to pull his weight even before he should have been up and about. He wasn’t a lazy man by any means. His one fault, as far as Abe was concerned, was that he allowed himself to feel too much.
With a snort, he stripped down to bare skin in the chilly bedroom and strode into the bathroom to shower off. He glanced over at the other sink where Celina had left her female things, a brush, her toothbrush, and a hair clasp. Seeing them lying there jerked at something deep inside of him. He turned away and adjusted the shower as he stepped inside. Thoughts of her played across his mind’s eye like a trailer for a movie years ago. He couldn’t stop them, and soon he was imagining her without her clothes.
“Hell.” He quickly ducked his head under the stream of water and washed his face.
Thinking like that about her was a sure way to damnation. She wasn’t available to him like that. Not just because she was pregnant, but because she had only recently lost her husband. Besides, she was a good woman. She didn’t deserve to be treated like an easy lay. Sex was all he could offer. There wasn’t anything human or normal left inside of him to offer her even if she was open to more.
“Russell will be a good man for her once she’s had time to grieve.”
He quickly finished his shower and turned off the water. He needed to dry off and dress before one of them called up that dinner was ready. He glanced at his semierect cock and winced at the thought of stuffing it into a pair of jeans. The chill of th
e air outside of the shower had helped calm him down some, but it hadn’t fully taken care of the issue. He should have jacked off in the shower instead of fighting it.
Just as he walked out of his bedroom, Celina entered the hallway. His dick stiffened, and he was thankful he’d decided on warm ups until he realized his arousal would be noticeable. Gritting his teeth, Abe stepped to the middle of the hall.
“I’m on my way down.”
“Good. I was just coming to tell you that dinner is ready.” She smiled at him as she drew closer to him.
Abe wanted to tell her to stop before the light from her lantern revealed his problem. Instead, he stood his ground and waited for her to draw closer.
“I’m on my way down.”
She smiled and had just started to turn back around to leave when her eyes snagged on the front of his jogging pants. She froze. Her eyes widened then drifted almost shut as she licked her lips. Just as suddenly her eyes shot back to his with some expression he couldn’t read. Then she turned and hurried back toward the stairs.
“Slow down, Celina, so you don’t fall. I’ll be down in a minute.” He wanted to give them both a few minutes to settle down before he joined them in the kitchen.
She didn’t say anything, but she did slow her gait as she descended the stairs. It took him a good three minutes to rein in his desire and bury it under a will of iron. At least he hoped it was still made of iron. God knew he needed it. Having her wary around him wasn’t a bad thing, but it ate at him. If he were honest with himself, deep down, Abe didn’t want her to fear him. An ache bloomed that he had no doubt would soon grow into something much worse before spring. How he was going to endure it, he didn’t know.
He tended to the fire in the great room before he finally made himself walk into the kitchen. Russell and Celina were already at the table, ladling soup into their bowls. There was also a plate of fluffy biscuits and various jellies to choose from, as well. Seeing the two of them sitting together so easily burned in his gut. He quickly beat down the resentment and reminded himself that he wasn’t interested. She was too young for both of them, but Russell seemed to be in better emotional shape than he was.
