Hate to Love You

by Jennifer Sucevic

  This time, there’s no smile in sight.

  His whiskey-colored eyes normally dance with mischief. Unless they’re smoldering with heat. But neither of those emotions are present. Instead, they flash with barely-suppressed anger.

  Unease prickles at the bottom of my gut. “What’s wrong?” I swing the door wide, allowing him inside. Zara isn’t home, so we have the place to ourselves.

  His body vibrates with pent-up agitation as he stalks past me into the living room. Closing the door, I silently pad after him. For just a moment, he stands in front of the window overlooking the street before dragging a hand over his face.

  “I’m sorry to just show up like this.” His shoulders are hunched. There’s a closed-off look about him. One that tells me to keep my distance.

  “It’s fine.” Unsure what to do, I stay frozen in place. Something is coming, I’m just not sure what. Unconsciously, I hold my breath and wait.

  “I was kicked out of practice today,” he mutters.

  “What?” Out of all the things I was expecting to hear, that wasn’t one of them. Shock floods through me, and my eyes widen. Hockey means everything to Brody. I can’t imagine what could have happened to cause him to reach a breaking point.

  His eyes fasten onto mine before he pulls them away. Heaving out a breath, he says, “I threw a punch.”

  My head swims with confusion. “Why would you do that?” That kind of behavior doesn’t sound like the Brody I’ve gotten to know over the past month. My opinion of him has done a complete one-eighty.

  His eyes become hooded. “It doesn’t matter.”

  Ahhh. There’s only one person who could cause this kind of havoc.

  I force the question through stiff lips, “Does Reed have something to do with this?”

  Brody jerking his shoulders into a tight shrug is answer enough.

  Why is Reed so intent on causing problems for me?

  Needing to understand what happened, I push for answers. “What did he say?”

  Brody’s expression turns stubborn. He closes the distance between us with four long strides. Reaching out, he sinks a hand into my hair. His thumb gently strokes over my cheek. I’m tempted to close my eyes and lean into his touch, but I don’t.

  “It’s nothing worth repeating,” he bites out.

  My shoulders fall. Whatever happened between them is my fault. And I hate that. “I’m sorry.”

  His demeanor softens. I hadn’t realized just how rigidly he’d been holding himself until his entire body loosens. With his hand still in my hair, he pulls me against him. Once his arms are wrapped protectively around me, he drops a kiss on the top of my head.

  “You have nothing to be sorry about,” he murmurs. “The guy is an asshole.”

  I rest my head against his chest and squeeze my eyes shut. “I don’t want to cause problems between you two.”

  He chuckles, but it’s tinged with aggravation. “Collins and I have always had problems. That started way before you came into the picture.”

  “How much trouble are you in with your coach?” The thought of it makes me sick.

  “Other than getting my ass chewed out, it’s fine. I don’t want you to worry. There’s nothing to be concerned about.” He rubs light circles against my back as if I’m the one who needs to be consoled, which is ludicrous. His arms tighten around me, and I burrow into their comforting strength.

  “Just do me a favor and stay away from Reed, okay?” Brody says.

  I tilt my head until I can meet his eyes. Concern swims around within their golden depths. “I don’t want anything to do with him.”

  “Good.” Again, he relaxes. “Keep it that way."

  He walks us over to the couch and I fall onto his lap as he takes a seat in the middle of it. My arms are still wrapped around him. I just want to hold Brody close. I want to be the balm that soothes his soul.

  He sucks in a breath and expels it with measured movements. “We need to talk.”

  And just like that, my world tilts sideways.

  He’s going to end this. I can feel it. And after what happened at practice today, I can’t blame him for wanting to put a little distance between us. This charade has gone on long enough. The last thing Brody needs going into the season is to be on his coach’s shit list or have bad blood with another player.

  If I hadn’t gotten all gooey-eyed, I would have expected it sooner.

  I nod and steel myself for the inevitable.

  Wait a minute…

  What am I waiting for?

  That’s when I decide to pull the plug myself.

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Brody

  “I get it,” she says abruptly.

  “Get what?” What’s there to get? We haven’t even begun to delve into this conversation yet.

  My brows draw together as I stare at Natalie.

  My gaze drops to her lips.

  I’m tempted to wrap my fingers around her neck and bring her mouth to mine. As soon as she opened the door, I wanted to gather up her into my arms and kiss her. It showed great restraint on my part that I didn’t do exactly that.

  Unfortunately, this conversation needs to happen. And it needs to happen now. Especially after what that douchebag said on the ice. Every time I think about it, it pisses me off. I need to know where Natalie and I stand. I don’t want to dance around my feelings anymore.

  She drags her gaze from mine and says woodenly, “That this needs to end.”

  Even though I’m sitting on the couch and she’s perched on my lap, I rear back. What’s she talking about?

  This isn’t how I envisioned this conversation unfolding.

  Like at all.

  My brows jerk across my forehead and nearly slam into the ceiling. “You want to end this?” I don’t give her time to respond before clarifying, “Between us?”

  Well, fuck.

  This isn’t good.

  Sharp white teeth sink into her lower lip, and she jerks her head in the affirmative. “It’s probably time, don’t you think?” She avoids eye contact, looking everywhere but at me. I have no idea what’s going on in that head of hers.

  Fed up, my fingers settle under her chin. I gently turn her face until she has no choice but to meet my gaze again. “What the hell are you talking about, Davies?” Even though I don’t mean to snap out the words, that’s exactly what happens.

  “When we got together, we agreed this relationship would last for a few weeks. After the whole thing with Reed died down, we’d go our separate ways.” She looks at me for confirmation.

  “I know what we said,” I mutter, feeling annoyed by the way this is going. I went into this arrangement knowing that a relationship with me would be a tough sell, but still…I didn’t expect Natalie to drop me like a bad habit. I’d been holding out hope that things had changed between us.

  Maybe I was wrong to assume she felt as strongly as I do.

  She shrugs. “Well, it’s been a month. We should probably move on.” Something flickers in her eyes. “Right?”

  Now I’m getting pissed.

  Scratch that…I’m already pissed.

  “Is that what you want?”

  Remaining silent, she jerks her shoulders.

  I wrap my hand around the back of her neck and bring her face close to mine until our foreheads can touch. “Is that what you want, Natalie?” I repeat.

  Dodging the question, she turns it on me. “Isn’t that what you want?”

  I inhale a deep breath. One of us needs to dive into the deep end of the pool first, and I guess that someone is going to be me. “No, it’s not.”

  “It isn’t?” A look of shock slides over her features.

  I shake my head. “I know this started out as some fake, bullshit relationship, but that’s not what it is anymore. At least not to me. My feelings for you are real. And I don’t want to throw that away.”

  “Really?”

  “Really,” I confirm. If I’m going down, it’ll be in a blaze of glory. />
  Her lips curve sweetly. “I don’t want to either.”

  “Thank fuck,” I say as a tidal wave of relief washes over me.

  Her shoulders shake for a moment before she gets serious again. “Are you sure this is what you want, Brody?”

  “I’ve never been more certain about anything in my life,” I say with complete honesty. “I like you. I want the chance to explore it.”

  Her smile widens right before she leans forward and brushes her lips against mine. “I want that, too.”

  My arms tighten around her, holding her close.

  I’m never letting this girl go.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Natalie

  “Are you sure this is a good idea?” I ask nervously.

  I smooth a hand over my skirt for the hundredth time since Brody picked me up this morning. We’re on our way to his father’s house for Sunday brunch. This is the first time I’ll meet his family.

  Any moment, I’m going to throw up. I’m not ready for this.

  Brody squeezes my hand and glances over at me from the driver’s seat. A reassuring smile tilts his lips upward. His smile gets me every time. I used to grit my teeth whenever I saw him. Now my belly flips and desire sparks to life in my core.

  It’s amazing how much something can change in one short month.

  “I told you, it’s going to be fine,” he says, trying to comfort me. Which, of course, I appreciate, but it’s not doing much good. I’ve heard a lot about Brody’s dad. He sounds... controlling. Brody told me in the beginning that he wasn’t happy about us being together and at that point, we weren’t really even together. So, I can’t imagine anything has changed on that front.

  If given the opportunity to back out of this brunch, I would do it in a heartbeat. I don’t know what I was thinking when I agreed to it. Oh, right. I was over-the-moon-happy that Brody wanted me to meet his family. That he’s serious about us. How could I refuse?

  But still…

  I voice my deepest fear. “Your dad doesn’t want you dating. He wants you focused on school and hockey.” Not necessarily in that order.

  A shadow crosses over Brody’s handsome face. “I’m not worried.” He shrugs, and the darkness that had been clouding his features disappears, leaving me to wonder if it was there in the first place. “He’ll get over it.”

  Not saying another word, I nibble on my bottom lip and watch the scenery pass by outside the truck window. We’re about twenty minutes away from school when we turn into a high-end residential area and stop at a small brick building that blocks the entrance to a gated community. Brody rolls down his window and waves to the guard sitting inside. Then we’re once again on the move, slowly rolling down a street with multimillion-dollar houses sitting in the middle of massive lots. My eyes widen as I take in house after house. We’re talking huge stone and brick structures with perfectly manicured lawns, neatly trimmed trees, and flowering garden beds. A few have small ponds with water features in the front areas.

  These aren’t houses. They’re palatial estates. More butterflies wing their way to life inside the pit of my gut.

  Of course, I realized that Brody grew up with money. His dad was a professional hockey player and now runs his own company. But this kind of wealth is beyond what I could have envisioned.

  It’s a little overwhelming.

  Scratch that, it’s a lot overwhelming.

  I clear my throat and try to keep the awe and nervousness out of my voice. “This is where you grew up?”

  He shoots me a concerned look. “I know it looks intimidating, but you have nothing to worry about. My dad grew up poor, playing pond hockey in Minnesota. He doesn’t judge people by what they have, only by how hard they work.”

  We meander our way through the sub until we reach the very furthest edges backing against the woods. The properties are more spread out, each one sitting on a few acres of rolling land. The very last mansion looks like a fairytale castle with turrets spiraling into the sky. Brody turns into a driveway made up of concrete squares edged with bright green grass, set in a diagonal pattern.

  He parks in front of the massive stone house, and we exit the truck. By the time I slam the passenger side door closed, Brody has already made it around the hood and is at my side. He must sense my anxiety because he pulls me into his arms and holds me close. I inhale a big breath of air and slowly release it.

  “Everything will be fine,” he whispers. “I promise.”

  I nod against his chest. I just want to stay like this forever.

  “Ready?” he asks.

  As I’ll ever be.

  He separates himself and reaches for my hand. “You’re important to me. I want you to meet them.”

  His words melt my heart and give me courage to enter the lion’s den. How can I deny him anything when he says such sweet things to me?

  “Okay,” I say with a firm nod.

  Hand in hand, we walk up the wide stone stairs leading to the front door. Brody doesn’t bother knocking, just turns the handle and pushes it open. We step inside an enormous three-story foyer with a gigantic crystal chandelier hanging overhead. The floors are white marble, and there’s a gorgeous curving staircase with a fancy iron bannister that looks like something out of the movies.

  “Dad?” Brody calls out. “Amber?” His voice echoes throughout the cavernous entryway.

  There’s the click of heels coming from the hallway before a striking blonde with a warm smile greets us. “Hello, Brody.” She turns green eyes to me. “And you must be Natalie. We’re so happy you could join us!”

  Her friendly demeanor instantly puts me at ease. Maybe this won’t be so bad after all. It makes me feel silly for getting so caught up in my own head and psyching myself out. My first impression of Brody’s stepmom is that she’s really nice.

  “Your father is in his office on a conference call. He’ll be out shortly.” She nods toward the back of the house. “Why don’t we move into the sunroom and get started before everything turns cold? I’m sure he won’t mind.”

  Amber spins on her heels, and we fall in line behind her. I glance at Brody, who is still holding my hand. He gives me a wink and mouths, Told you so.

  I nod. He was right. I overreacted.

  We move from the entryway through a long gallery into a two-story family room. A massive stacked-stone fireplace occupies an entire wall. We continue walking through the family room into the kitchen. Everything is white marble, stainless steel appliances, and chandelier-type lighting. Three glass vases filled with lemons are strategically placed on the massive island.

  Mom would have a field day wandering around this place. Even before she got involved in real estate, she would drag me to open houses and get decorating ideas for our own house.

  Brody tugs on my hand, and I realize I’ve stopped to take everything in. We pass through the kitchen into another room that is all floor-to-ceiling windows with a set of French doors that overlook a spacious backyard that has a pool and formal gardens.

  The table is centered in the middle of the room. Brody pulls out a chair for me and then sits down at my side. Amber has been very gracious, chattering the entire time, but still…I feel out of my element. I hate to admit it, but it’s a relief that Brody’s dad is occupied for the time being. I need a few moments to find my bearings. It’s important that I make a good impression on him. Other than his dad and stepmom, Brody doesn’t have any other family.

  Amber flutters around the table, making sure everything has been laid out before taking a seat across from us. It’s hard not to notice how warm and kind her features are. “Brody mentioned that you two have known each other since freshman year.”

  I nod, thankful she’s opening up the dialogue and trying to put me at ease. “Yes, we met in a business class first semester.” My throat feels dry and scratchy. I pick up my glass of orange juice and take a large swallow.

  “It was hate at first sight,” Brody says almost conversationally. “It took three long
years for me to grow on her.”

  I nearly spray the juice from my mouth before forcing myself to swallow it down. Once I do, the coughing and sputtering begins.

  Oh my God! I can’t believe he just told his stepmom that! I’m trying to make a good impression so that his family likes me. And he just shot that to hell.

  “Brody!” I hiss.

  He laughs. His eyes dance with a mischievousness I’ve come to expect from him. “It’s the truth, right? I’m just giving Amber a little background story.”

  I shake my head furiously and peek over at his stepmom. I’m almost afraid of what I’m going to see. “No…” I hesitate, trying to backpedal my way out of this. “It wasn’t like that exactly...”

  I really hope Brody enjoys his brunch because it’s going to be the last meal he gets.

  A smile hovers around the edges of Amber’s lips. “I think you’re going to be good for my stepson, Natalie.”

  Just as we begin passing around platters of French toast, eggs, fruit, bacon, and hash browns, a man who bears a striking resemblance to Brody enters the room. He stops as his gaze connects with mine and I rise from my chair, holding out my hand for him to shake.

  Unlike his wife, his smile is more guarded. Polite, but not overly friendly. “It’s nice to meet you, Natalie. I’m John. Sorry for not being able to meet you when you arrived.”

  “It’s no problem. And it’s nice to meet you as well.” I gulp and push out the rest. “Thank you so much for inviting me to brunch with your family.”

  The easy feeling that had permeated the air changes, becoming stifling. He hasn’t said or done anything to make me feel uncomfortable. And yet, I do.

  John moves to the head of the table and takes a seat. Amber passes him a few platters and trays as he loads his plate with breakfast fare. “I hope everything is to your liking,” he says.

  I glance at Brody’s stepmom. “Everything is delicious.”

  Amber smiles at the compliment. “Please, help yourself to as much as you want.”