Lost Angel (The List #1)

by N. K. Love

  The next lingerie shop wasn’t as good but I bought a couple more pieces and a black silk short robe, the complete opposite to the thick soft dressing gown I’m used to. I get railroaded into buying a vibrating bullet, which I apparently lubricate and put inside me like the balls but this one has a remote control with all sorts of speed and pattern settings. The shop assistant couldn’t rave about it enough and added a complimentary tube of strawberry flavoured lube.

  Last but not least we’re going shopping for porn! Now that’s not something you do every day, or ever in my case.

  The shop windows are covered so that you cannot see inside at all. I’m guessing that means it’s going to be pretty risqué.

  When I follow Wills in, clutching onto her arm like a child going in to see the dentist, I didn’t know where to look first. Not out of shame or awkwardness but out of blatant curiosity and interest. I soon loosen my grip on Wills and go exploring whilst she waits for a member of staff to be available. There are whips, floggers, cuffs, chains, strap-ons, masks… The smell of leather is in the air and incense burning from over in the corner. That’s when my eyes are drawn to the huge wall that’s been dedicated to the world of pornography.

  Wills asks the bearded dude at the counter about the latest DVDs that he recommends for a newbie… That’ll be me then! She may as well have been discussing what fillings he prefers in his sandwiches because he was so casual in conversation.

  I feel compelled to join in considering it is obvious they’re talking about me and now I start to feel like a child at parents evening, when their parents talk to the teacher about them while they just sit there in silence.

  I straight up tell them I don’t want to watch anal, which triggers a bombardment by all three of them. They fire closed questions at me like they’re fine tuning my sexual desires to an art form. I was caught in a whirlwind of cock, gay, pussy, anal, oral, orgy... So many choices, no wonder it’s such a mahooosive industry.

  Finally our hairy helper selects two DVDs that are similar and apparently softcore mainstream. Clearly he doesn’t want to scare me off and have me running for the nearest convent.

  Our wrists and shoulders have indentations to the bone from our many bags. So with my final purchase of the day hidden in a dodgy brown paper bag we decide to call it a day.

  I’ve had a brilliant shopping spree but can’t wait to get home and unload these bags of goodies. I really need some Ibuprofen for my back and a deep hot bubble bath to soak away these achy muscles.

  5:16pm

  When we get home we throw something quick in the oven for dinner whilst we go through our bags again but not before I’ve downed a couple of Ibuprofen. After strutting a few catwalks in the lounge, our food is ready. I read the instructions for my remote control bullet thingy over dinner, appetizing!

  After we’ve eaten, I clean up the kitchen and head to my room to get ready for a bath. Wills has just answered her phone and the conversation sounds serious so it’s good timing to give her some privacy. When I get to my room, I decide that for every new piece of clothing I have, I’ll donate an old piece to charity. I make my selections, discarding mainly baggy and black clothes into a charity bag. I notice a brighter difference straight away when I hang my new clothes in the wardrobe. I put away my lingerie and have an underwear cull too, whilst I’m feeling ruthless. I’ve only kept a couple of boring ‘comfortable’ bras and knickers now. The sexier underwear and refreshing rainbow colours in my wardrobe inject more happiness into my lovely day. I cut off the tags, throw my new silk robe across my bed and put my other little goodies in the bedside table drawers. I may have a drink and watch one of those DVDs tonight as we don’t have any plans to go out.

  I strip off and slip on my silk robe to see how it feels and it doesn’t disappoint. Mmm it feels so lush gliding over my skin. Why did I ever stop treating myself to little luxuries like this when they make me feel so deliciously feminine?

  I twist my hair into a messy bun on top of my head and pick up my phone to locate the sounds of a certain Italian pianist to join me in the bath. Just then a text from an unknown number appears on the screen.

  Wud u like me 2 drop & give u 50?

  Who the…? I don’t remember giving anybody my number and definitely not Jax. I start making my way downstairs to ask Wills but I can still hear her talking on the phone so I go back to my room.

  No, I know she wouldn’t have. It must be someone from last night though with the implied connotation. I did speak to a few guys—nah, I definitely didn’t give out my number. Okay, play it cool, let’s see where this is heading.

  50? Is that all uv got?

  That all depends on who’s looking back up at me.

  Suggestive and cocky. This has Jax written all over it. As much as I want to tell him to fuck off for walking out, I’m super curious. Plus it could be somebody else. I need to lure them out…

  You’d barely reach 25 if it were me then!

  Really? That’s very presumptuous of u. Ur that gud huh?

  No, not basing that on MY performance…

  Wat r u suggesting? That I cudnt satisfy u?

  Argh! Still not specific enough, this isn’t working, I’ll have to call him out.

  U tell me Mr Premature!

  I’d rather show u but I can assure u, ur mistaken. Y wud u say that?

  Oh u know… Here 1 minute, gone the next…

  Ooh… Now I see.

  Whilst I’m deciding how to respond, another message comes through.

  I thought u’d finished with me. Did u require my body 4 anything else in particular Angel?

  I knew it. Jax! If I’m so much of an angel why am I desperately drawn to his devilish charms?

  My stomach somersaults. Then it dawns on me that I have no real reason to tell him to fuck off anyway. The thought of asking him why he left or even where he went, just makes me cringe. As much as I’ve been feeling like I’m addicted to Jax, I’m not a bunny boiler. That lap dance was a big deal for me because I’ve never done anything like that before. Plus I’m sure that my hunger to make him want me is one of the reasons I pulled out the stops. For him it was what it was – a bit of fun.

  I feel nervous now but can’t hide the excitement that he has made the effort to somehow get my number and text. I suppose I did ask to be friends-that-flirt, it’d be rude not to indulge, even just a little…

  Well actually, r u any good with ur hands? I’ve been on my feet all day & I’m aching all over.

  Luckily for you, I’m qualified in sports massage & I can assure u that they’re anything but premature. I’m always very thorough. B at the gym for 6pm 2moro.

  Jeez, that didn’t play out how I intended. Is he serious? He sounds serious. I was hoping for more flirty fun texts. I’ll try and steer this back on track…

  I don’t like being told what to do…

  And then I quickly follow up with:

  …unless I’m naked.

  B there at 6pm & I’ll c wat I can do 4u.

  R u serious?

  Always

  Ok. I’ll luk 4ward 2 it. Btw how do u know my number?

  I know everything… Including ur medical history ;)

  Winky face! Medical history? What is he talking about? Oh, duh! 24/7, my registration information.

  Abusing ur managerial status? Tut tut

  Not abuse, more like leading by example, delivering exceptional customer care. Checking on the wellbeing of our finest member & offering my services. I always like 2 go that extra mile. Appointment 6pm sharp!

  Bossy huh? Hmmm. Ok boss, as long as u don’t put a ‘dis’ on the front of that ‘appointment’.

  Impossible.

  I’ll hold u 2 that.

  Oh and u calling me ‘boss’… U have no idea wat that does 4 me!

  Sorry but my bubble bath is calling me 2 ease these aches & pains. C u 2moro x

  Whoops, was the ‘x’ too much, too weird?

  No way r u goin 2 leave me with that image Beth. I’m no
t done playing with my flirt-buddy yet. R u going 2 let me join u?

  I wish! Not that I want him to know that.

  Last night, when Miss Alter Ego had a last minute spark of genius with the water bottle, it was just another sexy excuse to push it a little further. Hands down, his lips on mine was by far the best part of that mission. With lips like that, they’re bound to be talented—and experienced no doubt…

  Mmm, when I think about brushing against his erection during that dance last night. It killed me not to just drop my full weight down and ease the throbbing between my legs. That was my so called fIirt-buddy! More stomach somersaults. My gladiator.

  Now that wud b more than flirting G!

  G? How about a compromise?

  My new private nickname 4 u & I’m always open 2 compromise.

  —with Jax. I’m always open to compromise with him.

  No problem B (& that’s not short for Beth). How about we play another little game of mine? Trust me, this one is far better.

  He is talking about him kissing that girl in front of me at Tricks. And ‘B’? Breasts, boobs, butt? How original… Whatever anyway, I like ‘B’.

  I’m waiting…

  I am going to tell u wat happened in part 2 of last night. It’s the version where u accept my invite 4 privacy. I won’t b there 2 touch u so you’ll have to do that 4 me…

  It won’t be the first time G…

  I’m enjoying our exchange so much, I type faster than I’m thinking. Why am I admitting to touching myself over him? Okay, it’s okay, we’re just messing around. It’s like role-play, I can always deny it.

  Likewise B

  No way—is he telling the truth? The thought of him masturbating whilst thinking about me is such an incredibly sexy vision, I would have loved to have seen that! What did he think about exactly? I wonder if it was last night.

  Well, I hope my head can handle what I’m about to do because I already know I’m going to do it regardless. I want to take my imagination on this journey with Jax, in whatever way I can have him, right now. It’ll give me a much better insight as to what goes on in his head too, without his body here to distract me. No harm in a fantasy fuck, even when it’ll be closely followed with a headfuck… Stop thinking now Beth, just go with it.

  Ok, but this seems a little 1 sided, wat’s in it 4 u?

  Promise me that u will get in the bath & when ur ready I will send u messages. I don’t need any replies. Just the thought that u will be readin them, in the bath, wet, horny & naked, imagining us, word 4 word… That’s more than enough 4 me Angel.

  I promise. Hmm it sounds like uv done this before…

  Never & I don’t lie. Just call it divine inspiration B… R u naked now?

  All but a silk robe.

  Lose it. Start running ur bath. Hot & deep. Tell me when ur ready.

  And so it begins… He is right, this little game is far better than his mind games in Tricks.

  I do as I’m told, putting the mixer tap on full blast. Adding lots of shea butter bubble bath. Before I waver, I rush to the kitchen to grab a large glass of dutch courage. Wills is nowhere to be seen. There’s half a bottle of white wine in the fridge so I take that with a glass and head back to the bedroom. I fill the glass and place it on the corner ledge of the bath. The bath has filled quickly and the room’s steamed up nicely, smelling divine. I hang my robe on the back of the door and grab my phone.

  I’m all urs G.

  Propping my phone in a reachable position on the cabinet, I rest it on a bath towel and step into the bath. It smells and feels so good. I’ve dimmed the light to help set the mood, not quite candlelight but it’ll do.

  I have never met anybody remotely like Jax and if my life hadn’t turned in this direction I can’t imagine that our paths would’ve ever crossed. He is spontaneously sexy and somehow presses buttons in me that I didn’t know existed. He brings out a side in me that Mike never managed. It surely can’t be solely due to how much I’m attracted to him, there must be something more.

  I want to spend more time with him, delve a bit deeper and try to get to know him. Then I’ll know if it’s the sexual chemistry that’s creating this deep craving that I have for him, or something even deeper. But in the meantime, let’s concentrate on this moment. My G, my bath, his words and our imaginations… Yes please!

  U lead me away from everybody, up the stairs. It’s dark & empty. U pull me over 2 a private alcove & go 2 sit down. Instead I turn u around & bend u backwards across the table. It’s killed me to let u have control 4 so long so now it’s my turn to get militant all over u…

  Wow... This is what sexting feels like? I don’t know whether he has already imagined this or if he’s having to ad-lib but damn either way, I am vividly there with him, every step, my backs on the cold table staring up at his beautifully chiselled face. His next text can’t come quick enough.

  I can finally touch u. I get rid of ur jacket, bend over u & I pull back the material of ur bikini with my teeth so I can finally wrap my mouth over ur fucking perfect tits. U dig ur nails in my back & I undo ur shorts. I rip them down to find that my fuckable little soldier is also going commando.

  Knowing that these words have travelled from his head to his fingers, to my eyes and then rippled all over my every part of my naked body—I can imagine the position he’s put me in. I inject the scene into my mind’s eye and it’s so good, so real. I feel myself aching for his body. So dominant, carnal and raw. This extreme physical need to have somebody is something I have never experienced. This is a major turn on when it’s coming from the likes of Mr Closed Book.

  My lips have parted, the steam from the bath and the heat of his words have dried my mouth and driven me thirsty. I shakily gulp back some wine and sink back down into the deep water surrounded by bubbles. I re-read the thread whilst I wait for the next instalment. Now I can almost smell him and I swear I can feel those sketched lips on my neck, my lips, my nipples. I just wish they really were but this is the next best thing I guess. This is the closest I can get without risking fucking it all up.

  I lift the words from the screen and hear them in his husky tone, letting every word resonate straight between my legs until my core deliciously tightens. My hands become his once more, hidden beneath the bubbles, making it easier to fantasize.

  U wrap ur legs around me & I stand back up, takin u with me. U bite down on my lip again & it feels as sexy as the 1st time. I grab the ass that’s been tempting me all fucking night & undo my trousers. I never go bareback but I need 2 feel every inch of you, inside and out. I aim my weapon at the target but don’t wait for any orders before I lower u down to hit it, inch by inch…

  F-fuck me, how can I be this turned on over his words? I’m breathless. This feels so much better than I ever dreamed it could over goddam text. The knowledge that he is somewhere imagining all this and typing these messages to me, it’s beyond arousing. I wish my vibrator was waterproof… Pfft, there’s no time for that so my… well his… hands will have to suffice. And that they do. I feel my breasts, rub and pinch my nipples in turn, whilst stroking myself deep inside over and over, finding my magical spot that gets me there without fail.

  … I can feel that ur lips r as fuckable as the ones on ur face. U squeeze tightly around my cock & I hold u in position for a minute. Ur mouth’s on my body wherever it can reach. Then you clamp down on my mouth. U tighten ur grip around my waist & I feel the bullets on ur badass boots dig into my skin, which reminds me how fucking perfect u look right now.

  Sexting with Jax is simply breath-taking… I’m aching, desperately waiting—wanting to feel him inside me. What I’d give to taste his skin right now. When I nipped his ear and bit his lip after that dance it was like the tip of the iceberg for me. My mouth was begging for carte blanche and it still is.

  I love that he called my boots ‘badass’ and he’s calling me ‘fucking sexy’. How can this man make me feel sexier than I’ve ever felt? Even on my wedding night when I revealed my ivory
corset, stockings and garter ensemble to Mike and gauged his reaction… Even that doesn’t compare to how I feel about myself, about Jax, in this moment. My stomach flips and flutters when I visualise him filling me, stretching me, I’m almost motionless whilst my fingers pull and stroke and rub and press...

  I pull back & slam deep & hard & u beg me for more through clenched teeth. I oblige & fuck u the way I’ve wanted 2 fuck u since the 1st time I saw u Beth.