Survival

by J Marie

  “What if someone sees?” I asked, a little shocked.

  “Then you’ll have to work extra hard at behaving to avoid that now, won’t you?”

  I looked at him in disbelief, but then it suddenly clicked.

  “Oooh, I get it, now. It finally all makes sense,” I said, crossing my arms over my chest as I stared him down. He gave me a look of caution, but I could tell he was curious about my sudden revelation. “G-string thongs and barely-there dresses?” I laughed. “Nice try, but if you think the risk of exposing myself down there will deter me from fighting you, then you are very wrong. I couldn’t care less who sees when it comes to my survival.”

  Darren stared down at me, that devious sexy shark-like grin of his plastered all over his face, and it quickly made me uncomfortable. I had probably overstepped my boundaries again. Fucking A.

  “You might not care now,” he said with a smirk, “but that’s only because I haven’t told you what will happen should anyone ever lay their foolish eyes on what’s mine.” His voice suddenly became low and dangerous as he stepped closer to me, and I couldn’t help but find myself backing right into a wall. Fear crept into my chest as Darren’s eyes gleamed with possessiveness and I suddenly wanted to run again.

  Darren brought his hand up to my face, cupping my cheek in an almost too tight grip while those ocean blue eyes blazed down at me. My crossed arms slowly around me until I was unconsciously hugging myself, clutching anything I could.

  “I’d kill them, Jaden,” he finally said with absolute certainty. “Any man who is ever stupid enough to touch, speak, or even look at you without my permission will not live another day. And if I find out it was because you broke my rules and allowed it to happen, I will make you watch.”

  I gulped back my fear, trying hard to find the ability to make my tongue work again while my stomach twisted into itself.

  “You would kill your own men,” I stated. It was meant to be a question, but it came out as a simple fact.

  “Yes,” he said seriously, his thumb running across my cheek. “Because if anyone should know better, it’s them.”

  I was silent for a moment, taking in everything that he just said. If I wasn’t careful, I could very easily be responsible for someone else’s death. It obviously wouldn’t take very much to set Darren off and I really didn’t want to spend a single second of my time watching him torture and kill someone to punish me. Then again, maybe I could just inadvertently get him to kill all of his guards or anyone else I didn’t like for that matter, but I doubted that would work.

  But then something else came across my mind. He couldn’t control the eyes of every man I came into contact with. I couldn’t imagine he would keep me on his estate for the rest of my life. If he planned to marry me someday, then surely he would trust me enough to want to take me out in public, right?

  “But … how could you possibly control something like that? Eventually, I’ll be seen, especially if you plan to marry me. Unless … you intend on never letting me off the estate?” I asked with concerned sorrow in my eyes. God, please, no. I couldn’t spend the remainder of my life in this house.

  Darren’s eyes flashed with regret, but it was gone before I could barely register it. He released a slow, even breath through his nose before he finally spoke.

  “I don’t plan to let you leave the estate for a very long time,” he said. “And even longer before I even think about taking you out in public, if ever.”

  I nodded then, looking away as a small tear dripped down my cheek. I don’t know why, but I suddenly felt more grief and hopelessness than I had expected. I shouldn’t have been surprised. Even if it was ten years from now and I had given Darren everything he wanted, he still probably wouldn’t trust me.

  Darren’s thumb wiped the tear from my cheek, and I sniffed back the remainders that wanted to fall with it. “Why are you crying?” he asked.

  “Because, even after I’ve given you everything, the marriage you want, the sons you expect, even after I’ve sacrificed my soul to you, you will still never trust me. And I don’t want to spend the rest of my life hidden away from the world because of that.”

  I looked up at him with torment in my eyes. How could he expect me to live a happy life if I were confined to one singular acre of the world? I would always remain a prisoner, no matter what my status was to him.

  “I don’t trust anyone, Jaden,” he replied. “That’s the world I live in. But if you’re afraid I won’t let you out in public because I don’t trust you, then you’re misunderstanding me. I’m more than confident in upholding your compliance in front of a crowd, but that’s not what concerns me.”

  I looked back up at him with teary eyes I fought to withhold.

  “I want to keep you hidden because outside of these protective walls is a dangerous world I want to shield you from. My world is cruel and ruthless and once it discovers you, you will become a target for my enemies. Unfortunately, your manifestation is unavoidable, especially after you become my wife, but what can be somewhat avoided is the threat that comes with it. Your safety is of the highest priority to me, Jaden, and if that means locking you away from the world for the rest of your life, then so be it.”

  Suddenly, I felt small, helpless, and vulnerable, but in my head, I was none of these. I was strong, capable, and a total fucking badass when I wanted to be. But when someone spoke of me as anything but, as the complete opposite, of someone weak and in need of constant protection, I felt like shit. I felt useless, like a child who needed watching to make sure they didn’t accidentally spill the milk or trip over their untied shoes. This wasn’t me. I deserved more respect than that.

  I supposed I should appreciate his concern, but it was just an insult. I wasn’t a child. I might just be slightly bigger than one, but I could hold my own and Darren had to acknowledge that. Otherwise, I’d spend the rest of his life, however many years he had left, proving him wrong.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Wager

  I wasn’t a huge baseball fan, but the moment we entered the kitchen and I saw the game on the flat-screen TV hanging on the wall, I was suddenly the Detroit Tiger’s biggest fan. Opening day was one of the grandest days of the year and Jordan and I would usually skip out of work, go downtown, and get wasted for it. I’d threaten the guys who harassed us, and we’d have a fantastic time. Times like this, I missed Jordan the most. Whenever I needed a laugh, she was there with an endless supply.

  Darren and I sat down at the kitchen island where two dinner plates were set. The game was at the beginning of the first inning and I leaned over the counter intently to watch, rubbing my temples to ease a headache that was growing into a migraine. I was acutely aware that if I happened to lean over too far, I would expose my ass, and since I wasn’t ready to witness the bloodshed that would occur from my exposure, I decided it was in my best interest to follow Darren’s rules. I wasn’t a fan of going commando, but I supposed at this point, I didn’t have a choice.

  “Headache?” Darren suddenly asked me.

  “Mmhmm.” I nodded, closing my eyes.

  “Why didn’t you ask for some aspirin?”

  I looked at him dumbfounded. It had never occurred to me to ask him for anything because somehow I always thought either the answer would be no or I would be in trouble simply for asking.

  “I ... I didn’t think ...” I really didn't know how to answer him.

  “Would you like some aspirin?” he asked softly.

  “Yes, please.”

  He then stood from his chair and walked over to one of the cabinets in the kitchen. Pulling out a small white bottle, he poured some pills in his hand and came back with two little white pills. I pinched the pills out of his hand and swigged them back with the glass of water by my plate.

  “Thank you,” I said, setting the glass down and wiping my mouth.

  “Jaden,” he said, taking my hands in his as he stood before me. “I don’t want you to remain under the impression that you can’t come
to me when you need something. Just as you have an obligation to please me, I have an obligation to take care of you. But it’s more than just an obligation, Jaden. I want to take care of you, but I can’t do that fully unless you’re honest with me. If you need something, tell me, and I will do everything I can to make it happen. Understand?”

  “Okay, I understand.” I nodded.

  “Good. Now, eat your dinner and watch the game.”

  I looked down at my plate, noticing the steak, baked potato, and green beans practically overflowing from my plate, and I was suddenly starving. The steak was fantastic, and I chewed slowly, savoring the taste as I watched Cabrera score a home run.

  It was the strangest thing. One minute, Darren was chasing me down and chaining me to his bed, and the next, he was tender and sincere while giving me painkillers for a headache he probably caused. I couldn’t figure him out. He was like a damn Sour Patch Kid. Sour one minute and sweet the next. I had only been here three days, and I could already find myself craving the softer side of him … because it made me feel safer ... and special …

  How twisted was that?

  Around the sixth inning, we had finished our dinner and Darren took our plates and set them in the sink. I was stuffed and my headache was finally gone as I planted my elbows on the counter and rested my chin in my hands, watching the rest of the game. I was finally starting to feel human again as Verlander threw a curveball and struck the batter out.

  “Ha!” I smirked at the TV. The score was now tied three to three with the Tigers up to bat.

  “I wouldn’t get too excited,” said Darren as he came back around to the island and sat down.

  “Pfft,” I scoffed. “I bet the Tigers win in the ninth.”

  “I’ll take that bet,” he said, narrowing his eyes at me. I raised an eyebrow at him.

  “Huh?”

  “Let’s make things interesting, a little deal. If the Tigers win, I’ll show you what’s in my garage. I know you're dying to see what kind of toys I have in there.” He gave me that knowing smile, the one I trusted the least.

  I regarded him closely. I would love to know what he harbored in his garage with the kind of money he had, but I would only find out if fate would let me.

  “And if the Tigers lose?”

  “You have to talk to me about your father,” he said intently.

  I groaned out loud, furrowing my brows and turning my head away from him. He was the last person I wanted to discuss personal and emotional matters with. I angrily stared down at the counter.

  “Why would you want that?” I asked softly, still keeping my eyes down.

  “Are you questioning my desires, Jaden?”

  I wanted to say yes, but I shook my head instead. I just didn't understand why it mattered to him was all.

  “Fine,” I finally said. The Tigers had better fucking win.

  It was now the bottom of the ninth and the Tigers were batting with two bases loaded.

  Home run, home run, home run!

  And then Martinez stepped up to the plate and swung.

  Strike one.

  Fuck.

  Swing. Ball one.

  Fuck! Come on!

  I was leaning forward as I watched the screen like a hawk, praying to God Martinez would save me from some emotional torment.

  Please, please, please!

  Swing.

  Home run!

  “FUCK YEAH!” I shouted as I watched the ball fly out of the arena, throwing my fists in the air and rising off my chair. “Ha! You get ‘em, Martinez!”

  And then I instantly sat back down and covered my mouth with my hands, peeking over at Darren. I expected fury and rage to come barreling at me, but instead, I found the brightest smile on his face as he beamed at me.

  “That was the most genuine happy emotion I have ever seen you display since your time with me.”

  A small bit of relief washed over me as I realized he wasn’t angry but was rather enjoying my enthusiasm and excitement.

  “Well, I don’t take small victories with you lightly,” I said cautiously.

  He laughed. “I suppose you wouldn’t.”

  “Okay, time to pay up.” I narrowed in on him. I was beyond excited I had actually beaten him at something, even though it was all by chance.

  He rolled his eyes at me, unable to hold back his grin. “Okay, unlike you, I can admit when I’ve legitimately been beaten, but you do know eventually, I will get you to talk one way or another.”

  “Maybe … but not tonight!” I smirked. I was too excited even to think about that right now.

  Darren shook his head at me and took my hand, leading me to a side door by the kitchen. He unlocked the door and total darkness greeted us. Until he turned the light on and my eyes sparkled like it was Christmas morning.

  The garage was massive—large enough to fit at least ten cars—but that wasn't what stole my attention. Lined up on the right-hand side in perfect order were six beautiful bikes, and I almost started drooling. My excitement seeped from my skin as I walked tentatively over to the road machines.

  “Oh, my God,” I breathed.

  He had a blacked out Ducati 1299 Panigale S, (the same fucking model as me!), a bright green Kawasaki Ninja 300, a deep red Honda CBR1100XX T, a royal blue Yamaha YZF-R1, and a gun metal gray Ducati Diavel Strada. He even had a black Harley-Davidson VRSC V-Rod and a bright red Kawasaki KTM 450 SX-F dirt bike. Holy fuck. Someone liked to go fast.

  They were all so beautiful. I could just imagine rolling on the throttle of that Panigale and riding the fuck out of here.

  I looked over at Darren, who was regarding me closely, the hint of a smile lurking across his lips.

  “Impressed yet?”

  “Very,” I had to admit. “I see we have similar tastes in bikes,” I said, nodding over to the Panigale.

  “Maybe one day, if you’re lucky, I’ll take you for a ride.”

  “Pfft,” I said, turning my back to him and crossing my arms. “I don’t ride bitch.” And then I instantly winced, my stomach dropping as I realized what I’d just said. I turned around and quickly backtracked. “I’m sorry.” My hands came out. “Habit.”

  His face was not so forgiving, and he crooked a finger at me. Fuck.

  I cautiously walked over to him, wrapping my arms around myself as I stopped right in front of him and kept my eyes on his chest, not really wanting to look up at him. I hated looking into his face when I knew I was in trouble, like a dog with its tail between its legs. His hand came down hard on my bare ass that still remained very vulnerable under his shirt, and I winced at the contact, almost yelping as my ass was still super sore from my earlier transgression.

  “You’ll ride whatever the fuck I tell you to, understand?”

  “Yes, Darren,” I admitted in defeat. I just needed to keep my goddamn mouth shut. He walked ahead of me then, leaving me standing there with a throbbing ass.

  “So if I tell you to ride the dirt bike through the woods, you’ll do so.”

  I turned and dropped my arms to my side in disbelief. My sore ass forgotten. “Really?”

  “Sure.” He shrugged. “After you’re done riding my dick.” He turned to face me with a smart-ass grin plastered all over his face.

  I furrowed my brows at him and crossed my arms over my chest.

  “And if you ever earn it, of course,” he said.

  Right …

  I looked around the rest of the garage, noticing all the other toys, work benches and power tools. I was practically jumping up and down when my eyes landed on the four wheelers and dune buggies until my eyes suddenly caught a glimpse of the twin Jet Skis hiding over in the corner. They were both Kawasaki Ultra 310LX’s, and my mouth dropped to the floor the moment I saw them. They were black and lime green, and they were was the most beautiful Jet Skis I had ever seen. Why the hell were they in here instead of out in the water where they belonged?!

  “Jet Ski fan too, huh?” Darren said, walking over to me. “Shocker.”
<
br />   “Oh, yes,” I confirmed. “My cousin has one, and we tear the shit out of it every time.”

  Darren chuckled at me and crossed his arms across his chest. “Somehow, I don’t doubt that.”

  “Is there a chance in hell I could ever ride one of these?” I asked hopeful.

  “We’ll see. I wouldn’t want you falling off and cracking your head open again.”

  My heart skipped a beat for a second. How did he know about that? That was five years ago when my cousin was driving. She hit a heavy wave and knocked me off the back where I cracked my skull on the side of the Jet Ski and blacked out.

  “How the …?” I raised an eyebrow at him and gave him a hard look.

  “What? You don’t think I’m capable of doing a full background check on you?”

  “Why would you do that?” I knew the answer, but I wanted to hear it from him.

  “Because … I intend to know everything about you, Jaden. And I figured I would start with everything that’s on paper,” he said leaning into me.

  My brows furrowed in anger at the thought of him digging into my private information and putting his nose in my business. I took a deep breath and tried to keep myself calm.

  Don’t get mad. Don’t get mad. Don’t get mad.

  “Well, I hope you were satisfied.”

  “Oh, I was but only temporarily. You have a very interesting medical history.”

  “Thanks,” I said bitterly.

  “I may have to keep you on a short leash until I feel confident of your ability to keep yourself out of harm’s way. You were a bit of a klutz when you were a teenager as well.”

  “Those accidents were nearly ten years ago. I’m a lot more experienced now.”

  “Not with my toys,” he dejected. “There’s a lot of power behind them. Power you’re not used to handling.”

  “I can handle you, can’t I?” I smirked. That was a bit ballsy.

  “Can you?” he asked me darkly.

  “Isn’t that why you chose me?”

  “It is, but you still need a lot more training.”

  “Yeah, I’ll work on that,” I said, turning back to admire the Jet Ski.