by J. H. Croix
Before I got a word out when I answered, my dad spoke. “Good day, Liam!” he said, a cheery tone to his voice.
Given that he’d had the roughest few months of us all since mum died, my heart clenched. “Good day to you, Dad. How are you?”
“Fine thanks, and you? How’s the knee?”
“Much better,” I said, my mind instantly cartwheeling to Olivia.
“Truly?” he asked.
I could hear the hopefulness in his voice and knew he’d been worried about me. He’d called a few times since my injury. While I’d been worried about him, he’d likely been just as concerned for me. “Truly, Dad. I’m back practicing with the team, and I’ll be playing in our game next week.”
Alex started walking ahead, so I followed behind at a slower pace. “How are things for you? Really?” I asked. I couldn’t quite bring myself to state the painfully obvious, that mum had been gone going on months now. My parents had been lucky and loved each other to the end.
“I’m okay, Liam. I miss your mum, and I always will. I’m getting used to being dragged out and about by half the world between your brothers and our friends. But I’m okay. Truly.”
My throat tightened as I imagined my father being dragged out of the house just to cheer him up. It was odd to think about mum just now. I hadn’t realized it, but I’d gradually begun to adjust to her absence, which was a shift because I’d felt like kicking and screaming at first. Much as I’d had mixed feelings about signing with the Seattle Stars at first, I supposed the abrupt change of locale might’ve actually helped me. Hearing dad’s voice and thinking of my mum just now sent a sharp stab of grief straight to the heart.
I cleared my throat. “I’m glad. Tell me how Carter and Leo are?”
My dad chuckled. “Carter’s got ‘imself a new girl who’s a bit too busy for my taste. She’ll be gone before we know it. Leo’s working like a dog as usual. Tell me how you are. You don’t sound quite right.”
I took a deep breath, savoring the briny ocean air. Alex had turned along another dock, so I followed at a distance. My dad was too perceptive. I wasn’t certain if I didn’t sound quite right because the call with him brought up mum in my mind, or the ever-present pang of missing Olivia. Dad was one of the few people I’d turn to for advice. He rarely interfered, but he was clear and perceptive. “I don’t?” I hedged at first.
“You don’t. I’ve been reading the Seattle papers though and saw that silly Millie was in town.”
Dad knew I hated the churning British gossips and had been beyond annoyed by Millie’s machinations last year. Before I managed to reply, he continued. “And who is the woman you took to dinner? It’d do you good to find a nice girl,” he said gruffly.
Leave it to my father to find a way to keep tabs on me. He was quite protective and had been known to chase off reporters if they tried to pump my family for info. His question about Olivia sent a pang through me. I’d yet to sort out what to do, and Alex had made his displeasure clear. He thought I was a coward, and I supposed I was. It was just that I was floundering with this. The challenge of Olivia had given me something to chase. Yet, I hadn’t counted on love factoring into the equation, which had thrown me off.
“Liam? You still with me?” my father asked.
“I’m here, Dad. Millie’s a bloody pain in the arse. I’ll ignore her just as I did before. I’m certain she’s getting paid to attend the game next week, some bullshit publicity stunt.”
“Right. Tell me something I don’t know though. Millie’s antics aren’t what’s got you sounding so down.”
I cleared my throat and gulped in air again. Alex walked beyond the end of the docks and aimed back toward downtown with a glance over his shoulder to see if I was still behind him. I gave a wave and thought about how to explain Olivia to my dad. “You’re right. Millie’s nothing to me. I met a girl, and I don’t know what to do about her,” I said bluntly.
“Ah. Is that it then?”
“Yes, Dad. I just said as such,” I said, a hint of irritation threading my tone.
“Tell me about her.”
“She’s the surgeon who operated on my knee. She, uh…” I ran out of words. How to describe Olivia? She was lovely with her wild dark curls, her bright green eyes, her creamy complexion, and her sweet curves. I pictured her that first day I saw her, adjusting her glasses with her hair pulled back and a few curls merrily escaping her bun. In truth, the powerful desire she elicited was only scraping the surface of all she’d become to me. Her warmth, her brilliance, her strength of conviction, the fact she didn’t even care about what so many others did as far as my status as a footballer, and just her. I missed her so, and I desperately needed to find a way to win her back…to go big.
“She means something to you,” my dad said, his words interrupting my reverie.
“Yes. She does,” I said simply. “I mucked it up though, and I don’t know how to fix things with her.”
“Do you love her?” my dad asked, his question simple and direct like the man he was.
I kept walking, my eyes on Alex ahead of me. We were away from the harbor now, walking along the busy street that led to our flat. My heart gave a hard kick at my dad’s question, as if nudging me to face the truth. With my heart banging a swift staccato, I managed a breath and let it out slowly.
“I do. I love her,” I finally said.
“What’s her name?”
“Olivia.” Saying her name sent a pang of longing through me.
“If you love Olivia, then you make it right,” my dad said.
“I don’t know how.”
“Liam, you do know how. If you love her, you just need to think on it. You will find the right way. I’ll say this though. You’re my oldest boy and you’ve always had a good heart. Your mum was worried about you because she fussed your career would get in the way and send women like Millie after you. If you’re not sure what to do, think on it and it will come to you.”
I swallowed against the tightness in my throat and nodded, realizing as I did my dad couldn’t see me. “Dad, I haven’t done this before. How would I…?”
“Liam, none of us knew how to do love until we did it. I don’t know your Olivia, but I know you. You’ve a big heart and there’s room to figure this out. Don’t think too hard.”
“Okay,” I said, my voice sounding distant to me.
“Love you, son. I’ll be watching the game. I’ll fly to visit soon to meet your Olivia. Okay?”
“Okay. Love you, Dad. I’ll sort this out. I will,” I said, my voice sounding stronger than I felt.
The line clicked off, and I slowly slipped my phone back into my pocket. Glancing ahead, I saw Alex had stopped at the intersection before our flat and was leaning against a sign pole, his hands in his pockets as he stared up at the sky. With nothing other than Olivia on my mind, I jogged to meet him. One thing I loved about Alex was quiet came easy with him. He simply inclined his head and arched a brow when I reached him. The light changed, and we crossed the intersection.
The team had interviews this evening, prearranged months ago by management. If there was one thing I didn’t enjoy about football, it was the media circus that went along with it. I’d had this fleeting hope it would be less so in America because here they couldn’t keep the sport straight, but with the Seattle Stars an up and coming team in the international ranks along with a few other American teams, the media attention was rising. With Olivia filling my brain, for once I didn’t care about the interviews. I’d get through the bother and sort out what to do.
Chapter 30
Olivia
I was home with rain falling in sheets outside, glittering on the windows as it rolled down the glass. My day at work had been longer than usual with an emergency surgery thrown in the mix. I’d walked home in the rain, and unlike a few weeks ago, Liam hadn’t surprised me at the door even though I’d been wishing he had. My quiet evenings were chafing for me now. What had once been comfortable held an echoing emptiness. It was
my life, the very life I’d had and been perfectly content to continue before I met Liam. In such a short span of time, he’d turned my world upside down. I wondered if I’d keep wishing not to be so lonely until I met someone else. Yet, I doubted anyone could fill the Liam-shaped hole in my heart. No one else would do. Daisy had declared I should go to Liam myself since it was obvious I was so miserable. However, the fact that he’d heeded my request to leave me alone spoke volumes. That and the underlying truth of how different our worlds were reminded me it was best if I moved on and found a way to let go.
I sipped my hot chocolate, liberally doused with Irish cream liqueur, and opened my laptop. With a flick of the TV remote, I scrolled through the channels to find the best background for me while I worked, settling on a news show. A while later, I’d wandered off on a tangent and was scrolling through the website for the local animal shelter. This had occurred on the heels of a sharp pang of loneliness when my fingertips, which were plagued with a mind of their own, had clicked around online looking for news about Liam. I secretly did this even though I hated that I couldn’t seem to resist. I would stare at pictures of him and miss him so much, it was a visceral pain. I came across a photo of him after a game in Seattle, shortly before I’d met him at the clinic. He was standing on the sidelines, his black hair mussed with a streak of dirt on his leg, his body emanating strength and power even when he was doing nothing other than standing in one place. It felt as if he was looking right at me, his blue eyes piercing as he stared at the camera. A jolt of longing hit me, so hard I had to catch my breath.
Abruptly, I determined I’d find a pet to keep me company. Perhaps then I wouldn’t feel so lonely. I was presently reading the description of a cute cog with one ear that flopped down and another standing up. The dog in question was a male of indeterminate breed named Bentley. He was brown all over and on the small side. I’d never taken advantage of this benefit, however the clinic had an on-site doggy daycare for employees started years ago by one of the founders who loved to bring his dog to work. If it weren’t for that, I couldn’t even consider a dog because my work life didn’t fit the needs of a dog. Bentley’s sweet brown eyes called to me. I quickly fired off an email, selecting an appointment time from their website calendar. I’d be meeting Bentley tomorrow at noon.
My phone buzzed on the coffee table, indicating a text. I ignored it, reasoning I needed to get back to work. Seconds later, it buzzed and buzzed and buzzed. I finally grabbed it and saw Daisy had been texting. A call from her came through as I started to read her texts. I answered immediately.
“Good grief! What is it?” I asked.
“Channel 4!” Daisy practically yelled in my ear.
“What are you talking about?”
“Oh my God. Go to channel 4 on the TV.”
“Why?”
“Just do it,” Daisy said, her exasperation evident.
I snagged the remote off the coffee table and switched to channel 4. Liam was on screen talking with an interviewer. His friend and fellow teammate, Alex, was a few chairs away, along with several other men I presumed to be players on the Seattle Stars. I couldn’t have changed the channel if my life depended on it, but I was almost angry Daisy made me see this. I didn’t need to dwell on Liam.
“Why are you making me watch this? I need to move on, not watch him on TV.”
“I’m hanging up. Listen and don’t you dare change the channel.”
The line went dead in my ear. I let the phone drop and tapped the button to turn up the volume. Despite part of me screaming for me to stop, I couldn’t. I had to hear Liam’s voice.
The interviewer was a woman with blonde hair, coiffed perfectly into a glossy bob that swung about her shoulders. Her eyes were locked onto Liam. “Well, Mr. Reed, as I’m sure you’re aware, Millie Morton will be on hand for the exhibition game next week. Are the rumors across the pond true?”
Liam shifted in his chair and rolled his shoulders. He wore a navy button down shirt and faded jeans. His eyes were bright under the lights of the set. Even though he was surrounded by several other sexy soccer players, my mind barely registered their presence.
Liam eyed the interviewer, his gaze slightly annoyed. The pause between her question and his answer began to stretch, and I wondered what he might say. He cleared his throat, a hint of nervousness rising in the back of his eyes. How I knew that I couldn’t say, yet I could feel it.
“Actually no. Those rumors are nothing more than that. I’ve never even been on a date with Ms. Morton, nor considered it. She chooses to create a different impression, one that’s entirely untrue,” he finally said.
The interviewer’s eyes widened and she leaned back in her chair, angling her head to the side as if this was a serious matter. Meanwhile, my heart was beating like a drum, and my breath had gone shallow. “Is that so? How come you never chose to clear this up before?”
Her question had a tone of disbelief as if Liam was trying to fool her. His eyes narrowed. “Because it wasn’t worth it, but now it is. I’ve never bothered to address the rumors about my personal life because I find it distasteful that anyone asks. But I won’t stand by and allow Ms. Morton to perpetuate the false narrative she allowed the gossip pages to create. I’ve never been involved with her and never will. My heart belongs to another now and always will.”
His words hit me like a bolt of lightning, and I almost dropped my hot chocolate. The interviewer’s eyes widened, and she leaned forward in her chair. “Is that so? I don’t suppose you’ll let our audience know who that may be? Is it someone you left behind in London?”
Liam shook his head and shifted in his chair again. Tears were hot against the back of my eyes. He looked right at the camera. “I’ll choose not to give her name because no one deserves to be hounded by the gossip rags. She’s not in London. She’s right here in Seattle, and I love her.”
My phone was buzzing again and again and again, Daisy’s name flashing on the screen. I ignored it and stared at Liam. I didn’t hear much of anything else that was said as the interviewer asked a few more questions of Liam and moved on to speaking with the others players. Liam’s eyes were locked to the camera, and mine were locked to the screen. I leapt up from the couch.
Chapter 31
Liam
I sat on that damn interview platform set up at the stadium with my heart pounding and nearly sweating through the bloody button down shirt I’d been forced to wear for this group interview. I’d always hated this part of being a footballer. I loved to play and loved to work toward bringing whatever team I was on to the pinnacle of their performance, yet the publicity drove me nearly mad. I hadn’t thought ahead about the interview and had distantly heard the guys joking about Millie in the locker room the other day. My mates from London, Alex, Ethan and Tristan, all knew I’d never had anything to do with her. Yet, the guys here in Seattle were still just getting to know us after we’d been traded to the Stars. I was so miserable over missing Olivia and trying to think of what to do to win her, to make her understand how much she meant to me that my usual annoyance about the bloody stupid machinations of Millie didn’t even rise. It never occurred to me the interviewer would bring her up.
Here I was now, on the heels of publicly announcing I was in love with someone, and I didn’t even know if Olivia had heard it. Brilliant planning on my part. That was the problem with me when it came to Olivia. I lost all ability to plan. I played the most strategic position in football as an attacking midfielder, better known as the playmaker. Everything I did in play revolved around me functioning essentially as the brain of the entire team, orchestrating our attack and distributing the ball accordingly. I had to think under pressure at all times and shift gears in a flash. When my mates didn’t know what to do with the ball, it landed with me. All of my natural skill with quick thinking went out the window when it came to Olivia. I could hardly think. I somehow got through the rest of that bloody interview. Alex’s eyes caught mine at one point when I apparently ignored a q
uestion. He stepped in and saved me by answering. Damn good thing because I’d entirely lost track of what was being said.
Finally, fucking finally, the interview ended, and we were escorted off the interview set and behind the cameras. Alex leaned close to me ear, his voice low. “Well, mate. That was big. Buckle up because you just set the gossips salivating.”
I glanced to him, my eyes wide. “Bloody hell.”
His eyes widened as we kept walking down the hall, being escorted quickly to the locker room. Coach had scheduled a meeting. I was tired from a grueling practice this morning and now emotionally drained from my impromptu declaration during the interview.
“Uh, so you didn’t plan that back there?” Alex asked, his question nearly lost in the shuffle of footsteps echoing on the concrete floor of the hallway.
“Hell no. It just happened. I didn’t even think about what it might mean as far as the whole publicity thing. Fuck. Olivia isn’t going to like that. Not one bit.”
“You didn’t say her name, so that should keep them at bay for a bit, but it’ll be like hounds on a scent. You might want to call her,” Alex said.
There was a sudden pause in our walk down the hall. Our teammates in front of us parted like water giving way, angling to one side of the hallway. I was looking at the floor, obsessing over what to say to Olivia because I’d just gone and created a potential mess for her. She was a private person. I knew she wouldn’t want the manufactured drama. All I wanted was her, not the whirlwind of the entire sports media machine commenting on us. I also didn’t even know if us was an option yet.
Alex nudged me with his shoulder. I ignored it and kept walking, but he almost punched me next. “What the hell?” I asked, glancing over at him. Alex stopped and lifted his chin forward. I followed his gaze and saw Olivia standing in Coach’s office door. Coach stood beside her, his expression bemused. My feet stopped and I stood there staring at her, my heart pounding like mad. Her cheeks were flushed and her hair was damp. I dimly recalled it had been raining when we came back to the stadium for the interview. She appeared to have forgotten her raincoat as her cream-colored blouse was plastered to her skin and there were damp streaks on her charcoal gray leggings. My eyes caught on the fact her blouse was buttoned crookedly, as if she dressed in a hurry. All in all, she looked like a drowned rat. She was the most beautiful sight I’d ever seen.
