by J. H. Croix
I inclined my chin and nodded in return toward Dr. Adams. “I couldn’t ask for better care. Between Dr. Bowen and Tim, I won’t be surprised if I’m stronger than I was before when I return to play.”
Olivia kept her gaze studiously averted from me, but she wasn’t budging from where she stood by the door. I could either make this situation much, much worse by trying to insist she keep talking with me, or I could leave and regroup. I called upon every ounce of grace my mother instilled in me and walked to the door, passing a little too close to Olivia. “I was on my way out, so I’ll leave you two to talk.” I paused at the door, looking straight at Olivia. “I’ll be in touch.”
I knew it was brazen to say anything in front of her director, but I bloody well didn’t care. I had to force my feet to move. The office door closed behind me, and I kept walking, my heart sick and my stomach nearly chewing itself up.
Chapter 26
Olivia
I walked quickly through the chilly drizzle, my head down and my eyes on the sidewalk. I didn’t have to look up to know when I’d reached Desert Isle Café because the glow of light spilling from the windows glittered on the wet sidewalk. I was meeting Daisy for coffee. I’d almost backed out because I wasn’t quite up for talking about Liam, but I needed reinforcements. Last night, I’d turned off my phone after the first text from Liam, only to wake up to a several more from him, ending with: So you’re not going to talk to me this way. Right then. I won’t bloody give up.
I didn’t doubt for a second that Liam would show up at my apartment or office again. What I didn’t understand was why he wouldn’t just let it go. I wasn’t stupid enough to think what lay between us wasn’t powerful, but he had to realize it was smart to end things. I needed to get back to the life I used to have, the one where I took pride in my job and where the emotional tides of desire and need weren’t swinging me back and forth inside. I breathed through the knot of pain in my chest and pushed through the door into Desert Isle. This was one of my comfort places, always warm, always welcoming, and relaxed enough I didn’t have to worry about anything. A small sense of relief washed over me to be here. I saw Daisy already in a corner table with Harper and gave a quick wave as I headed to the counter.
Moments later, I slipped into the empty chair at the table and glanced between Daisy and Harper. “Hey there. Sorry I’m a few minutes late. I lost track of time while I was charting.”
“Hey, for once you were later than me,” Daisy said with a grin. “Harper, of course, was probably right on time.”
Harper rolled her eyes. “The only reason I’m usually on time is because if I’m on this side of town, it’s because I had a meeting somewhere other than my office. Anyway, how’s it going?” she asked, her warm blue eyes on me.
I could tell Daisy must’ve filled her in, otherwise she wouldn’t look so concerned. I didn’t bother to sidestep and looked between them. “I’m fine, perfectly fine,” I said, an edge of frustration in my tone. I’d been telling myself I was perfectly fine. My life would go right back to what it had been—drama free and without the emotional muddle of tripping and nearly landing on my face in my free fall dive into Liam.
Daisy had her coffee mug halfway to her mouth and set it down with a thump. “You are not fine. You look like hell. Liam tracked me down today too.”
“What?!” I interjected, my eyes widening and my pulse leaping.
“If you’d bothered to call me today, I’d have filled you in,” Daisy said with a thread of annoyance in her tone.
“I’m sorry. I was really busy at the clinic.” Daisy had texted around noon, telling me she needed to talk to me. I’d fired off a quick reply that it would have to wait until tonight. “So what did he want?” I couldn’t help the pitter patter of my heart, hope doing a little dance inside.
Daisy leaned back, her gaze softening. “Believe it or not, he wanted my advice. I don’t know what you said to him yesterday, but he’s pretty upset about it. What happened?”
I didn’t know what to think of the fact that my heart gave a little jump at hearing Liam was upset. It’s not like I wanted him to be upset, but at least I wasn’t alone in being a mess inside. I took a gulp of coffee, savoring the bracing flavor. “I guess I broke up with him. It’s not like we were really together, but I told him we needed to stop.”
Harper idly traced the edge of her mug and looked to me and then Daisy. “What did Liam say?”
“He said Olivia won’t talk to him, and he wanted my help. I asked him how much Olivia mattered…” Daisy swung her eyes in my direction. “And he said she meant everything. That man is seriously into you. I might think it’s stupid for you to wonder why he’s into you, but I get worrying about the whole thing. I feel responsible for blowing this up by texting you about that photo. He said you mentioned it and then explained the whole thing. Context always matters. Give the guy a chance. He looks like a lost puppy, and I think he seriously had to check his pride to come talk to me. Not to mention he actually had to hunt me down.”
“So what was your advice?” I finally asked. That stupid hope was running in circles in my heart to hear Liam had tracked Daisy down to ask her about me.
Daisy leaned back, her gaze speculative. “Not telling.”
“Not fair,” I said sullenly, taking a quick gulp of coffee.
Harper shook her head at Daisy. “Seriously?”
Daisy was unrepentant. “Seriously? I’m actually trying to be a good friend here. If there’s one thing I know about you,” her gaze swung to me “you’ve been way too committed to being alone. It’s not like I gave away any secrets. I just gave the man who’s so obviously in love with you a few pointers. That’s all.”
I stared at her, my heart drumming and my throat tight. To hear her so easily say Liam was in love with me did crazy things to me. Before Liam, my life had been tidy and calm. Even if I was trying to convince myself that was best, it was hard not to miss him acutely every other second.
Harper’s brows hitched up, and a low laugh escaped before she turned to me. “If there’s one thing you can trust about Daisy it’s that she’d kick Liam’s ass if she didn’t believe he was that into you. Maybe you should give him a chance.”
I tried to shove away the hope blooming inside me. I couldn’t let this sweep me right back into the foolish insanity. It was too overwhelming, too messy and made me feel out of control, which I definitely did not enjoy.
I wasn’t up for debating the point with Daisy and Harper, so I glanced between them. “Nothing’s going to change. He’s a famous sports star with women drooling over him. I’m a doctor with a pretty boring life, all things considered.” I took a sip of coffee and glanced to Daisy. “The photo was a good reminder of everything I’m not. That’s Liam’s life, not mine.”
My throat tightened and tears pressed at the back of my eyes, so I drained the rest of my coffee and stood to get a refill. I didn’t want to keep discussing Liam. I wasn’t getting the reinforcement I’d hoped for from Daisy and Harper. I wanted someone to tell me my choice made sense. I got another coffee and returned to the table. Harper glanced up and looked as if she might say something, but instead she looped her arm over my shoulders and gave me a squeeze. When Daisy started to say something, Harper shook her head firmly as her arm slid off my shoulder. “Not now.”
Daisy gave her a hard stare and shrugged. Conversation moved on topics that had nothing to do with Liam. By the time I left a while later, I felt slightly lighter inside, if anything because I’d had a little time where my thoughts managed to temporarily skip off the groove of Liam deepening in my mind.
Hours later, I lay in bed, my eyes wide open and the ache of missing Liam keeping me awake.
Chapter 27
Liam
“What the…?!” My last word was choked off by the towel slapping against my face.
I grabbed it and yanked it off, promptly tossing it right back at Alex. “What the hell?” I asked, finishing my question this time.
Alex caught the towel and flung it into the hamper before leaning against the doorframe and crossing his arms. He’d just finished showering and his hair was damp and sticking up in a rumpled mess. That didn’t detract from his glower. When Alex was pissed, it showed. “Bloody tired of you moping around. Go talk to Olivia before I drag your sorry arse to her.”
I glared at him and plunked down in a chair at the kitchen table. “I’m not bloody moping.”
Alex shoved off the doorframe and sat down across from me, drumming his fingers on the table. “Aye, you are. Haven’t see you crack a smile in days. Thought you went to find Daisy for a reason.”
I swallowed against the tight feeling in my chest and rolled my head side to side, trying to ease the tension knotted there.
“Daisy wasn’t much help,” I mumbled and ran a hand through my hair.
“What did she say?”
“She told me to go big or go home. Whatever the fuck that means.” I shook my head slowly and sighed.
Alex eyed me. “What do you need? A point by point diagram, I suppose. Bollocks. You know what go big or go home means. If you’re too dodgy to face Olivia, it’s on you mate.”
I threw another glare in his direction, though my gut turned with a sick feeling. I’d been frantic to see and talk to Olivia, but she’d blocked every avenue—not answering my texts, ignoring my knocking when I stopped by her apartment and conveniently being busy anytime I happened by the clinic. In desperation, I’d gone to see Daisy who hadn’t exactly been helpful. She’d told me Olivia didn’t let many people close after her parents died. Not a shocker. Then, she’d gone on to show me the stupid photo online of Millie with me.
I’d hardly been paying attention while I was waiting outside the stadium with a few teammates. Millie, per usual, had pranced about us. Just as I’d told Olivia, Millie hadn’t been with me. Ever. But she’d done a damn good job of leading the British gossip rags around by the nose with scintillating hints. She’d taken every opportunity she had to drape herself all over me when we happened to be in the same place at the same time. While I’d be the first to admit I’d been happy to enjoy the women who threw themselves at me, I’d never had the slightest interest in Millie. She was too opportunistic, too greedy and too shallow for me.
I had to give Daisy credit for admitting she maybe should’ve taken a look at the next few pics online with Millie flirting with half the team. Daisy had looked appropriately chagrined, but it didn’t change anything. “Look,” she’d told me “maybe this set Olivia off, but this isn’t easy for her. She’s pretty well set in keeping her life calm. If you want to get her back, you’re going to have to shake her up. If you want her to believe you love her and it’s worth fighting for, you’re gonna have to go big, or take your ball and go home.”
Recalling Daisy’s words, I looked over at Alex and fought the urge to squirm. His way too perceptive gaze held mine. “I’m not being dodgy,” I mumbled.
“Well then, do something about it.” He gave me a hard stare and shook his head. “You’re due to play soon. Don’t let this get in your head. Make it right.”
At that, he shoved his chair back and stood, leaving me to stew in my own thoughts while he got ready for practice. I didn’t like thinking about it, but I was worried I was letting this get my all mixed up in my head. I might not have the tidy, calm life Olivia did, but I hadn’t had much experience with falling in love. Scratch that, I hadn’t had any experience. I had to force myself to drag my arse off the chair and follow him.
I spent the afternoon trying to keep my head on straight and spinning over what the hell to do that would be big enough to knock through Olivia’s barriers.
Chapter 28
Olivia
There was a soft knock at my exam room door before it opened. I looked over to see Dr. Monroe, the team doctor for the Seattle Stars stepping through the door with a patient. The patient in question was Mack Dawson, one of the American players on the team, a true-blue Seattle boy and handsome as all get out. Mack had a body to die for, shaggy blondish-brown hair and twinkling hazel eyes with a roguish smile. I looked at him with hope in my heart, hoping against all reason he’d elicit even a flicker of the attraction I felt toward Liam. Nothing, I felt nothing. I looked at Mack with a clinical eye, purely objective with not the slightest bit interest. I’d developed this disconcerting habit of thinking I was going to look up and find Liam. Today was worse than usual because I’d known Dr. Monroe was coming along with Mack and couldn’t help but wonder if Liam would take the opportunity to stop by.
No Liam. Only Dr. Monroe and Mack. I swallowed my disappointment and smiled politely at Mack. “Hello Mack, I understand your elbow had a nasty collision with the ground.”
Mack threw that roguish grin my way and even added a wink. Clearly, the man was an incorrigible flirt. I couldn’t help but remember the first time Liam had been in this room with me, just as flirtatious and naughty. Just thinking about the kiss he laid on me before he left sent a jolt of heat through me. I hadn’t heard from Liam in over a week. He’d even given up on texting me. I’d thought I wanted the very thing he was doing, yet I hated it. I missed him so much it ached, and I was getting restless and needy with desire. I’d never been restless and needy in my life. I’d woken several times deep in the night with the sheets damp and my panties wet from dreams about Liam.
Focus, Olivia. Focus. Liam did what you asked. Move on.
I adjusted my glasses and glanced between Mack and Dr. Monroe. “I had a few minutes to review the scan you sent over, but let me look again,” I said, picking up my computer tablet and clicking to the screen. “It looks like an ulnar shaft fracture. I see they’ve already iced you and stabilized it temporarily.” I set my tablet down and nodded toward Mack’s arm.
Mack nodded. “It was like a bad dance. I got tangled up with a defender. He fell, I fell and my elbow got twisted.”
“How much pain are you in?” I asked, fighting to keep from grinning. Mack might not do a thing for me in terms of attraction, but he was impossible not to like. He had an amusing, jovial way of talking and seemed entirely unbothered by the situation.
Mack shrugged again. “Not too much. I mean, it hurts, but I wanted to keep playing. Coach dragged me off.”
I looked to Dr. Monroe. The injury was minor by any standard and certainly didn’t require my expertise. I started to say as such, but Mack cut in.
“I know it’s not much, but I want you to take care of it. After seeing how Liam’s doing, I don’t want to bother with anyone but the best,” Mack said firmly.
The mere mention of Liam’s name sent my pulse skittering wildly and flutters twirling in my belly. I swallowed and batted Liam out of my mind. I slid my gaze to Dr. Monroe who was standing slightly behind where Mack was leaning against the exam table. Dr. Monroe shrugged and threw me a slight grin.
It wasn’t that I didn’t take minor cases like this, but it was rare. I knew, however, the clinic would want me to take any case requested by the Seattle Stars. I looked back to Mack and nodded. “I’d be happy to cast your elbow, although you must know your injury won’t require surgery and your rehab will be brief.”
Mack grinned again. “Sounds good to me, Doc.”
The conversation quickly turned to planning with Mack departing the exam room for an x-ray in order for me to set the bone this afternoon.
After Mack left the room, Dr. Monroe sent me spinning inside again by mentioning Liam. “Liam is due to play again next week. He started practice this week and hasn’t missed a beat. We can’t thank you enough for such a good outcome,” Dr. Monroe said.
I adjusted my glasses and managed a nod, scrambling to keep my wits about me. “I’m glad to hear it.” Questions tumbled through my mind, all of them entirely inappropriate to ask Dr. Monroe. I was relieved when my pager beeped. I checked the number and returned the call quickly.
I managed to skirt the topic of Liam through the remainder of the appointment, quickly casting Mack’s forearm and sen
ding him off to schedule with the rehab team. I hated the fact that anything that had a passing connection to Liam sent my mind racing along the loop dedicated solely to him in my brain. I walked home in the falling darkness, the evening absent of rain, which almost annoyed me because a rainy, gray day would’ve suited my mood better.
What would usually be a routine of comfort—making hot chocolate with a generous dash of Irish cream liqueur, settling down on the couch with a blanket draped over my legs, and the TV rumbling in the background while I finished up charting—felt lonely. I washed my single mug and plate from stale leftover pizza and set them in the dish rack before bursting into tears at the sight. Single everything. Single mug, single plate, single me. Liam had done just as I asked, and it hurt so badly I could hardly breathe at moments.
Chapter 29
Liam
My phone buzzed in my pocket as I walked beside Alex. He’d dragged me down to the harbor, insisting I needed to go somewhere other than the flat and the stadium. I hadn’t the heart for much else since Olivia had shut me out. I’d rejoined the team for practices in the lead up to a game next week and was doing my bloody best to keep my head in the game. Alex loved the ocean and was wont to drag me to the sea when we used to live back in London. Back there, we had to drive out of London to reach the sea. Our flat here was mere blocks away. We were presently walking along the docks at a harbor. Even at this early hour, the area bustled with energy with gulls swooping and calling, fishermen readying boats to leave, voices carrying across the water as the day began, and the low rumble of engines in the water.
I pulled my phone out of my pocket to see my dad’s number flashing on the screen. “I’ll take this,” I said to Alex. He merely nodded, hands in his pockets as he stared out over the harbor.
