Here Come the Boys

by Milly Johnson

  Funnily enough after that, Jerry and Yvonne’s attitude changed considerably towards the ex-farming couple. They were sucking up to them like a turbo-vacuum. Yvonne even complimented them both on the pattern of their knitwear, suddenly impressed by Fair Isle.

  Gil managed some soup, a bread roll and a couple of mouthfuls of roast chicken before giving eating up as a bad job. Despite his protestations, Angie accompanied him back to the room. The sea was still rolling but it had calmed since the previous day at least.

  ‘Darling, I am so sorry,’ replied Gil, climbing into bed. ‘Go and watch a show. Please. Don’t babysit me.’

  Only because she didn’t want him to feel bad, Angie agreed and went off to find a seat in the theatre where a comedian was going to perform. He certainly tickled the audience but Angie felt guilty about being there when Gil wasn’t well. Then again, he would have felt guilty if she wasn’t there. She really was between a rock and a hard place.

  She wasn’t tired at the end of the performance so she decided to have a nightcap in one of the bars. Corniche was in a quiet corner on the eighth floor. The galleried landing afforded a view over an open area currently being used for ballroom purposes. Angie ordered a double Armagnac and sat watching the dancers below. There was a tall elegant lady in a sparkling black dress dancing with an elderly man. She looked like the older-version-of-Sharon-Stone woman whom Angie had seen in the service station car park. The one who reminded her of Selina.

  Angie’s thoughts once again drifted to her school days. The gym. Selina pretending she had hurt her ankle so she wouldn’t have to do country dancing. She’d hated it. She would rather have stuck hatpins up her nose than jig a Roger de Coverley or a Birds and the Bees. Selina wouldn’t even dance in discos. She thought it was the most pathetic thing in the world for someone to gyrate to music in a crowd. It was apparently whilst Angie was happily strutting her stuff to Peter Andre at the last sixth-form disco that Selina moved in on Zander standing at the side.

  Angie went back to the cabin and slipped into bed beside Gil. He was sleeping soundly and tonight would stay that way all night. Angie dreamed that she was eighteen and she was dancing. She looked over to see Zander and Selina staring into each other’s eyes and she couldn’t push through the crowds to stop them. She awoke in the middle of the night with old feelings of hurt and longing once again uncovered, raw and stinging.

  DAY FOUR

  Chapter 6

  When Angie peeped through the curtains the next morning, it was to find the ship drifting into a sun-filled harbour. This must be Malaga. Angie needed to go ashore and shop, hopefully to find something special for Gil’s upcoming birthday. They were at sea for another two full days after that and she’d never been to Malaga before. She’d heard it was lovely.

  Gil struggled into his shorts but it was quite obvious that walking around in the sunshine was something he really didn’t want to do. They went to The Buttery for breakfast, but Gil couldn’t eat more than a couple of spoonfuls of Rice Krispies – and normally he could eat half a box of them. He joined the long line of passengers waiting to get off the ship though, not moaning at all, not wanting to spoil it for his wife. Angie pulled him out of the queue just before they presented their cruise cards to log them off board.

  ‘I’m not bothered about going into Malaga,’ she said. ‘Let’s just go and read or something.’

  Gil shook his head. ‘You are a rubbish liar,’ he said with a fond smile. ‘I’m okay.’

  ‘Yeah, and I’m Kelly Brook.’

  ‘Why don’t you go and have a look around without me?’

  Angie gasped open-mouthed at his suggestion. ‘You’re joking.’

  ‘No, I’m not. You were so looking forward to it.’

  ‘Holding up the queue, are we?’ Vernon’s head butted between them.

  ‘Vernon, please tell my wife to go into Malaga without me,’ pleaded Gil. ‘There’s a shuttle bus to take you into the main part of town. You jump back on it at the point where you get off, it couldn’t be simpler. Just have an hour or so to say you’ve been there.’

  ‘Come with us,’ said Doreen, threading her arm through Angie’s. ‘We’ll show you around.’

  And with that Angie found herself being swept forward in the queue away from Gil.

  Chapter 7

  The shuttle bus dropped the passengers off at the edge of the city.

  ‘Want to come and look at churches with us?’ asked Vernon.

  ‘Thanks,’ smiled Angie. ‘But I think I’ll hit the shops.’

  ‘Thought so,’ replied Vernon and pointed across the road. ‘You need to head in that direction, where all the other people are going. The shuttle buses leave from here and are pretty frequent.’

  ‘We don’t usually come into this part of the harbour, do we Vernon?’ asked Doreen, looking around with some confusion.

  ‘No, my love, we don’t.’ He pointed into the distance. ‘That’s where we’ve always docked before.’

  ‘I thought so.’

  ‘I must say I do like to have a full day in Malaga,’ replied Vernon with a small sigh. ‘Anyway, ecce agnus Dei, as the Romans say. Enjoy your day.’

  A full day. Well, Angie didn’t intend to stay that long. She’d head back about two o’clock. She followed other passengers into town and wished she hadn’t worn trousers. Thin as they were, her legs were baking in them. And a shirt with no sleeves would have been a better idea too. It was a little after ten o’clock and the sun was already volcano-hot. She ought to have brought a hat as well. She could have fried eggs on the back of her neck.

  She found a beautiful shop selling watches. It took her half an hour to pick one which she thought Gil would love as a fortieth birthday present, but the shop assistant wouldn’t take her credit card without evidence of a passport, which Angie had left in the safe on the ship. Her cruise card acted as her passport to get her back on board, so she hadn’t taken it out with her in case it got lost or stolen. Angie didn’t have enough euros on her so she left the shop to search for a hole in the wall. A cash advance on the visa wasn’t the wisest thing to do, but she knew Gil would love that watch. She walked back to the shop and bought it and then found a café to sit in and have a cold drink as it was getting too hot to walk about the streets. She decided to have a toasted sandwich too but wished she hadn’t as it took ages to arrive and was undercooked and soggy when it did. She sat in the shade and people-watched for a while then she slowly meandered back to the shuttle bus, taking photos and calling in at shops en route to see what souvenirs they had for sale. She bought an apron for her sister which looked like the front of a Flamenco dancer’s dress and a hat for herself which was white with a pink swirly pattern on it.

  There was no queue at the place where Angie was to pick up the shuttle bus but she was definitely in the right spot because she could see the Mermaidia in the distance on the water with her yellow distinctive funnel. Ten minutes later, Angie was still standing there alone. She checked her watch to find it was two o’clock, still early. She thought she better start walking though. She reckoned it would take her about fifteen minutes to reach the ship if she fast-paced.

  She had covered less than twenty metres when the Mermaidia blasted its horn and Angie felt a prickle of apprehension, which quickly grew to a full painful stab of panic as she saw the ship turn in the water and then set off towards the open sea.

  Chapter 8

  A few things happened all at once: Angie froze, her stomach cramped, her hands crackled with pins and needles and a whirl of mad thoughts took over her head: What do I do? I have to get back on the ship. I have no clean pants. What must Gil be thinking? Strangely, the fact that she didn’t have her passport on her didn’t feature in those immediate priorities. Or a mobile phone. She watched the ship growing smaller and mistier as it set off for the Croatian island of Korčula and she felt dumbstruck and very very numb.

  But then her survival instinct reared up and assumed immediate command.

  Head
to the port. There is another tourist ship there. With any luck they might be going the same way and give you a lift, it suggested. She caught up with an elderly couple walking towards the port eating ice creams.

  ‘Excuse me, are you on that Regal Island ship?’ she asked.

  ‘Yes, we are. Can we help you?’ They were American.

  ‘Where’s it going next?’

  ‘Lisbon.’

  ‘Ah, thank you.’

  Shit shit shit shit shit shit.

  Angie overtook them, ran into the port building and over to one of the officials.

  ‘Excusez-moi,’ she began. Damn. Where was all that schoolgirl Spanish when you needed it? ‘Senor. Hablas espanol?’

  ‘Si, senora.’

  Bloody hell. Of course he spoke Spanish, he was Spanish. ‘Sorry. Hablas ingles?’

  ‘Non.’

  Shit shit shit shit shit.

  ‘Senor. Estoy… en el barco Mermaidia.’

  ‘El barco ha zarpado,’ he replied, gesturing outwards with his hand. The ship had sailed, that must mean.

  ‘Si. Estoy …stuck. Help. Por favor. Socorro.’ Estoy up el creeko de shit sin paddelo.

  Although the official hadn’t a clue what Angie’s words meant, he could guess. ‘Un momento.’ He lifted his mobile phone out of his pocket and pointed her towards a row of seats. Angie made a heavy walk towards them and sank down on the end one. This was a nightmare. How could she have missed the bloody ship? Didn’t Vernon say they’d be in Malaga all day? Did he actually say that or had she presumed it was? Why hadn’t she checked? Who didn’t confirm what time you had to be back on board? The official walked over and handed his phone to Angie.

  ‘Hello,’ said a Spanish-tinged calm male voice. ‘I understand you have missed the Mermaidia.’

  ‘Yes,’ said Angie, trying to keep a little-girl sob out of her voice.

  ‘Right. So we need to reunite you with it. My name is Manuel and I am the Malaga port representative for Figurehead cruises.’

  He sounded kind and nice and not cross.

  ‘The ship sails into Korčula in three days’ time. You need to get to the airport and book flights to Dubrovnik. You have a credit card?’

  ‘Yes. I’ve got a credit card.’ Oh, it was easy after all. Angie could have laughed with relief.

  ‘And your passport.’

  ‘Well, I’ve got my cruise card. My passport is on board.’

  ‘Oh dear.’

  Suddenly it wasn’t easy again. Angie felt tremors seize her limbs. How the hell had she managed to get herself in this position? She felt as if she was going to be sick as passengers queueing up to get back on the Regal Island filed past her and turned to stare. She wondered if the words I’ve missed my ship were scribbled all over her face in black ink .

  ‘What do I do?’ A tear plopped out of her eye and she wiped it quickly away.

  ‘Well,’ began Manuel, ‘you need to buy an emergency passport from the consulate. I will ring them, but they are shut for today so you will need to do this in the morning at nine o’clock when they open. You will not be able to book a flight until you have this document. I will arrange a hotel for tonight. It’s a good hotel. Not too expensive. Maybe it will be a good idea if you share with the other lady. A taxi is on its way for her also.’

  Angie’s eyebrows dipped in confusion. ‘Other lady?’

  ‘Yes,’ said Manuel. ‘The other lady who has also missed the ship and does not have a passport with her either. You can share a room and halve the cost.’

  ‘Someone else has missed the ship?’

  ‘Unfortunately yes. Can you hand the phone back please?’

  Angie felt a weird sort of comfort that she wasn’t the only daft cow who was in this position. Safety in numbers. She handed the phone back to the official who spoke to Manuel in rapid Spanish before clicking it off and putting it back in his pocket. He gestured that Angie follow him and walked outside to a bench around the corner where the other woman was sitting and waiting, twiddling with a silver cross around her neck.

  The woman turned to her and Angie’s legs nearly gave way beneath her. Her fellow ‘daft cow’ was none other than Selina Molloy.

  Chapter 9

  ‘Ange?’

  ‘Sel?’

  Seeing the ship sail away was a mindblower, but this was far worse.

  ‘You missed the ship as well?’ said Selina.

  ‘You were on the same ship as me?’ said Ange at the same time.

  They both answered yes together, but neither acknowledged that with a smile.

  ‘Well. This is a shock,’ said Selina, puffing out her cheeks.

  ‘You’re telling me.’

  Selina had aged even better than Angie had imagined. She could indeed have been Sharon Stone’s younger sister, not quite as Hollywood-stunning as the actress but slim and golden and carrying an air of earthy sensuality. Angie did think there was some evidence of medical enhancement on her face though. Her forehead was as smooth as a baby’s bum and her perfect eyebrows didn’t look very mobile.

  Angie sat down on the bench, not too close to Selina.

  ‘A taxi is coming to take me to a hotel,’ said Selina. ‘I presume it’s picking you up too?’

  Angie nodded once. She couldn’t think of a single thing to say.

  ‘Have you got a phone?’ asked Selina.

  ‘No,’ replied Angie, flatly. Even if she had, she wouldn’t lend it to her.

  ‘You can borrow mine if you like, if there’s anyone you’d like to ring.’

  Under normal circumstances, Angie would have told Selina to stick her phone up her arse. But these were not normal circumstances and she was desperate to speak to Gil.

  ‘Thank you,’ she replied stiffly, taking the phone from Selina’s perfectly manicured hand. ‘My husband’s on board.’

  Gil answered after a single ring. He was beside himself.

  ‘Darling, are you okay? I presumed you were back on board until I went down to the reception desk after hearing them tannoy your name.’ Gil’s voice was weak and cracked. ‘They’d already set sail when I asked if they’d let me get off. Where are you?’

  ‘I’m at the port. I’m fine, don’t worry,’ said Angie, trying to sound braver than she felt. ‘There’s another… lady –’ ha, lady! ‘– here with me who’s done the same thing so I’m not alone.’

  ‘Oh Angie, I’m worried sick…’

  ‘Don’t be,’ she fought to keep the shake out of her words. ‘The Figurehead port rep has fixed up a hotel for us to stay in and I’m going to pick up an emergency passport in the morning and then fly to Dubrovnik to catch up with the ship when it lands in Korčula.’

  ‘How will you get from Dubrovnik to Korčula?’

  Angie hadn’t a clue. ‘Well, they’ll tell us, I’m sure. It’ll be okay.’

  ‘Did your watch stop? Didn’t you realise that you had to be back on board for one thirty? Did you forget to turn it an hour forward? What happened?’ Gil sounded as tearful as she felt.

  ‘It wasn’t my watch that was the problem,’ said Angie. It would have been the perfect excuse, but she wasn’t very good at lying. ‘I misunderstood. I thought we were here for the full day.’

  ‘Oh heck.’ He sounded really weak. Angie felt bad for making him worry about her in his far from perfect present state of health.

  ‘I’m sorry, Gil. I promise I will see you in a couple of days and then we can put all this behind us.’

  ‘Just tell me what you need,’ said Gil. ‘I’ll book your flights…’ beep beep beep

  ‘Gil? Hello…’

  The reception had failed.

  ‘No signal at sea,’ said Selina, accepting the phone back. ‘Bloody ships.’

  ‘How come you missed getting back on then?’ asked Angie.

  ‘Sheer stupidity on my part. I’ve been here so many times that I automatically walked back to the other part of the harbour where the ship usually docks. Realised my mistake too late. I overheard why you didn
’t make it back. That really surprised me. I always remember you as being Miss Super-organised.’

  ‘I still am,’ replied Angie, not happy that she was being dragged into a conversation with this woman. Of all the people in the world to be stuck with, why did it have to be her? She couldn’t have made it up.

  ‘Yeah. That’s how you’re here on this bench with me. So why are you by yourself?’ asked Selina.

  ‘My husband’s had bad seasickness for a couple of days and didn’t feel fit enough to walk around,’ Angie explained, then added quickly, ‘I only intended to get off for a couple of hours to buy his birthday present,’ just in case Selina thought she was a rotten wife who would abandon an ailing husband.

  So why was Selina here alone then? Angie was about to ask when a taxi approached.

  ‘I think this is for us,’ said Selina. She looped her small bag over her shoulder, as the taxi drew up in front of them and they got in.

  ‘I take you to Hotel Bella,’ said the driver. ‘It is not far.’

  The hotel was a ten-euro trip away. Selina paid, but Angie insisted on giving her half. She didn’t want any charity from Selina Molloy. From the outside, the hotel looked small and tidy and functional. The air-conditioning hit them like an angel’s breath when they opened the door to the reception area.

  The man behind the desk didn’t speak much English but he did manage to communicate that he needed to swipe their credit cards. Selina scrabbled around in her purse but couldn’t find hers. She clapped her hand to her head remembering why.

  ‘I left it in the room safe with my passport so I wouldn’t be tempted to spend any more than I had in my purse,’ she replied.

  Well, you’re stuffed then, aren’t you? Angie wanted to say. But she couldn’t.

  ‘I’ll pay you back,’ said Selina gratefully as Angie produced her card. ‘At least you know I’m good for the money.’ Her phone beeped in her bag warning her that it was low on battery. ‘Don’t suppose you have a phone charger?’ she asked the receptionist. He tilted his head at her. Selina pulled the phone out of her bag and pointed to the charge socket. Then she did a very good mime of a long wire and slotting a plug into a wall.