A Mother’s Sacrifice

by Kitty Neale

  ‘I hope so too, Frank. This is the last place I ever want to be again, but thank you so much for being my friend in here. It’s been good to have someone to talk to. I’ve never really told anyone about what Harry does to me. I suppose I’ve been too ashamed. You’ve been such a good listener and I’ve really come to trust you. I’ll miss you.’

  Frank reached across the table and took Glenda’s hand. ‘I’ll miss you too,’ he said. More than she would ever know.

  Chapter 4

  Harry shifted impatiently in the entrance of the hospital ward. Get a move on, he thought, as he waited for Glenda to gather her belongings.

  Harry was pleased that his wife was finally coming home after nine days in the ward. He had missed her home cooking. He’d been at Maude’s every night for his tea, but his mother wasn’t nearly as good a cook as Glenda. And he missed her warm body in their bed at night. But right now he felt peeved that the hospital wouldn’t release her without someone coming to collect her. It meant he had had to take the morning off work, which would give him a lighter pay packet at the end of the week, and he could really have done without that, especially as he had good reason to go out and celebrate tonight now that his wife was home.

  ‘OK, Harry, I’m ready now,’ Glenda said.

  She does look a bloody sight, thought Harry, what with that thick lip and her purple eye. Gawd knows what people are gonna think when I get on the tram with her looking like that. Maybe I should have forked out for a taxi after all.

  ‘Ain’t you got no dark glasses or a big hat or something? You look bloody horrible!’ Harry barked at her, but as soon as the words were out of his mouth he reprimanded himself, remembering what his mother had said. Maude had sat him down last night and given him a right good talking-to. She’d said that he was lucky Glenda was coming home to him after what he’d done, and made him promise to be nicer to her. Harry felt guilty, knowing Maude was right in everything she said – but if only Glenda would do as she was told! He couldn’t stand the way other men looked at her and, even worse, he felt sure she flirted with that Billy Myers. But, like Maude had told him, he had to leave the past where it belonged and concentrate on the future. Glenda might be a lot of things he didn’t like, but at the end of the day she was the mother of his child and as such deserved respect.

  ‘No, I haven’t got glasses or a hat,’ Glenda said, looking close to tears.

  ‘Sorry, love,’ Harry said as he put his arm around Glenda’s shoulders, ‘take no notice of me. It’s just this bloody place, you know I hate it.’

  Glenda didn’t answer but Harry thought he felt her flinch when he put his arm over her. They walked along the stark corridor and turned towards the main exit just as Frank Myers walked around the corner and came face to face with them.

  ‘So you’re off then, Mrs Jenkins?’ asked Frank.

  Harry could feel Glenda’s body stiffen and his blood boiled as he looked at the skinny hospital porter who dared to have the nerve to talk to his wife.

  ‘Yes, Frank,’ Glenda answered nervously, her eyes darting around the corridor, ‘but we’ve gotta dash. We don’t wanna miss our tram.’

  Glenda put her arm through Harry’s and pulled him towards the doorway, but before they went through Harry looked over his shoulder and saw Frank staring at his wife. His fists clenched and his jaw tightened, but then they were through the door and Harry felt himself being pulled along again.

  ‘So who the hell was he?’ he asked.

  ‘Nobody, just the porter from my ward.’

  ‘A nobody who seems to know you pretty well,’ said Harry with a distinct note of sarcasm.

  ‘Harry, please, just leave it, will you. I just wanna get home to see my Johnnie.’

  Harry looked down into Glenda’s bruised but still sexy eyes. His suspicions subsided and he pulled his wife towards him and gently kissed the top of her head. ‘Blimey, we ain’t even out the door and I’m off again. You’re right, let’s get you home. Johnnie’s gonna be chuffed to bits to see you. And I’ve got a little surprise waiting for you too.’

  Maude couldn’t help but keep dashing to the front window of Harry and Glenda’s house and twitching the net curtain. She was really looking forward to Glenda coming home from hospital. ‘Don’t get me wrong,’ she had told Bob the night before, ‘I love having little Johnnie here with us, but I ain’t as young as I used to be and I don’t mind admitting that the little bleeder is wearing me out!’

  Maude glanced around and noted that Harry had bought a lovely yellow chrysanthemum in a pot, which brightened up their rather drab living room. And he had repainted the kitchen in green. Maude hadn’t thought the kitchen needed doing up, but had soon worked out that he was probably covering up Glenda’s splattered blood that had stained the walls. Oh, that boy of mine, she thought, he’ll be the death of me.

  For the umpteenth time that morning Maude looked out of the window. She was pleased to see her son and Glenda walking down the street at last. She rushed to the kitchen and put the kettle on to boil. She thought about opening the window to let out the toxic smell of the newly painted walls, but then decided against it as it was far too chilly outside.

  As the front door opened, Maude was waiting in the living room with Johnnie in her arms, ready to welcome Glenda home.

  ‘Hello, love,’ she said, beaming as Glenda walked into the room, but unable to help noticing how her lip was swollen. Her nose looked a funny shape too. ‘Get your coat off and sit yourself down. I’ve got some hot water in the kettle for a cuppa and a little bundle of joy here who’s been waiting to see his mum.’

  ‘Johnnie!’ Glenda squealed as she took her child from Maude’s arms. ‘Mummy’s missed you so much.’

  Maude watched Glenda hold her baby close to her and instinctively rock him from side to side. Bless her, she thought, she may not be the best woman in the world for my Harry but she’s a good mum. I just hope she doesn’t turn the kid soft with all that soppiness. Boys don’t need hugs, they need discipline and a good hiding from time to time. Never mind, she’ll learn. As soon as the little blighter is up and running around, she’ll realise the need for the strap!

  Glenda sat back on the lumpy brown sofa, relieved to finally have her son in her arms.

  ‘Here, love, look what I got for you,’ said Harry as he pointed to the bright yellow flowers on the old oak sideboard.

  ‘That’s nice,’ said Glenda but she didn’t care about anything at this moment except holding Johnnie.

  ‘And you know that surprise I told you about?’ Harry said excitedly. ‘Well, look behind you. Can you see, through the door? I’ve done up the kitchen for you.’

  Glenda had noticed as soon as she had walked through the living-room door and there was no mistaking the strong fumes of the paint. ‘Yes, it looks lovely. Thanks, Harry.’

  ‘You don’t sound too enthusiastic,’ Harry snarled. ‘Put the boy down and come and have a proper look.’

  Just then Maude walked back into the room with a tray of three cups of tea and a plate of sandwiches. ‘Now then, son.’ She raised her eyebrows at Harry. ‘Glenda has only just got through the door. Leave her be and let her rest. Come on, take this tray.’

  For once, Glenda was grateful for Maude’s interference. She felt quite tired after their journey back from the hospital and just wanted to spend some time with her baby.

  ‘And, Glenda, I managed to buy a bit of something from a mate so I’ve put a nice mutton stew in the oven. When you’re ready for your dinner later, all you have to do is warm it through. My stew will help build your strength back up far better than that ’orrible hospital food!’

  I doubt it, thought Glenda, but she pasted a grateful smile on her face and looked at Harry, who had wrinkled his nose in mock disgust at the thought of his mother’s stew. The meat was probably stolen from some poor farmer, butchered and then sold on. Still, she knew better than to say anything, having learned the hard way to keep her mouth shut about any extras that Maude and Harry got
hold of.

  ‘Thanks, Maude,’ she said. ‘I must admit, I do feel a bit tired so I’m glad I won’t have to cook tonight.’

  ‘Well, then, it’s nearly time for the boy’s nap so why don’t you finish that cuppa and go and have a lie down with him. I’ve gotta get back to get Bob’s lunch ready. It’s Wednesday so he’ll be home early today.’

  ‘Yes, I’ll do that,’ Glenda agreed.

  ‘Thanks, Mum. We’re good here so you get yourself off home now,’ said Harry as he collected Maude’s coat from over the banister.

  This isn’t good, thought Glenda, dreading being left alone with Harry. As her body tensed, Johnnie seemed to sense her fear and squirmed in her arms. ‘It’s all right,’ she pacified him, pulling him closer to her.

  Once Harry had packed Maude off through the front door, he walked back into the living room, putting on his heavy overcoat.

  ‘Right then,’ he said with a smile, ‘you’re all settled so I’m gonna pop down the Castle for a couple of pints and then I’d best get to work. I’ve lost enough pay having the morning off, so I’ll see you later.’

  Glenda listened for the front door to close then breathed a heavy sigh of relief. Thank God, she thought as she got up, placed Johnnie in his pram and hurried into the hallway. She grabbed her bag from the hospital and frantically pulled through the clothes inside. When she had been on the ward packing her stuff to leave, she had seen a note inside her bag, which at a quick glance she could see was signed by Frank. But with Harry loitering in the entrance she hadn’t dared to read it properly so had bided her time. Now, though, with Harry out of the way, she sat on the third step of the hallway stairs and savoured Frank’s written words.

  Chapter 5

  The Indian summer had been short lived and it was beginning to rain quite heavily, which made Frank further doubt that Glenda would turn up to see him. At least he had suggested a place to meet where he could shelter from the downpour. He patiently waited under the bandstand for her.

  He had swapped some shifts around at the hospital, which enabled him to be in the park on a Friday morning, but it meant he would have to work tomorrow and he detested working over the weekend. But Glenda Jenkins was worth it. He wouldn’t have minded waiting all day for her or getting soaked through to the skin. It would be nice to spend some time with her outside the hospital, but, more importantly, he wanted to know that she was well and safe. Leaving the note in Glenda’s bag had been a risk, more so for Glenda than for himself, and he just hoped that Harry hadn’t found it and attacked her again. The thought of that man laying a hand on Glenda turned his stomach. But as worries for her safety began to stab at his mind, he spotted a woman running towards the bandstand, pushing a navy-blue pram. Even from this distance, Frank could tell it was Glenda. The closer she got, the more the butterflies in his stomach fluttered – for, though he had hoped, he hadn’t really believed she would risk secretly meeting him.

  Frank removed his oversized long grey mac, ran towards Glenda and held the garment over her head in a bid to protect her from the torrential rain. Between them, they quickly lifted the pram up the steps of the bandstand and once sheltered they both spoke at once.

  ‘You first,’ said Glenda with a smile.

  Frank noticed the swelling around her eye had almost disappeared and she looked even more beautiful than he’d remembered. She wore a scarf around her head, but her marcel waves were wet at the back, making her look windswept and interesting.

  ‘Hello, Glenda,’ Frank said, laughing. ‘I didn’t think you’d come, especially in this weather.’

  ‘I can’t stop for long,’ Glenda said, shaking the rainwater from her black woollen coat. ‘Harry likes to have an account of what I’ve been doing and I don’t think he’d believe that I was out for a walk in Battersea Park in this weather.’

  ‘Not to worry. I’m just glad you’re here now, if only for a little while. How have you been keeping?’

  ‘Not bad, thanks, Frank. It’s nice to be back at home with Johnnie, and Harry is actually making an effort, though I don’t know how long it will last. Still, I’m thankful for small mercies.’

  ‘I haven’t had the pleasure of meeting Johnnie yet. Do you mind if I stick my ugly bonce in his pram and say hello?’

  Glenda laughed. ‘Of course you can,’ she said, ‘but don’t expect much conversation. He’s out for the count.’

  ‘It’s a good job he can’t talk. We wouldn’t want him telling tales on us to his daddy now, would we?’

  ‘Oh, Frank. Please, don’t even joke about it! Harry would kill me if he knew I was here and probably you too! I couldn’t believe it when I found that note in my bag! What were you thinking, Frank Myers?’

  ‘I was thinking about you, Glenda. You’re pretty much all I think about these days.’

  ‘You mustn’t talk like that, Frank. I’m a married woman and it isn’t right.’

  ‘And it isn’t right that your old man knocks you from here to kingdom come!’

  ‘I know, sorry, Frank. But can we please not talk about him any more?’

  ‘Yeah, good idea. Least said about him the better. Look, I’ve brought some cheese sandwiches, though I’m afraid there’s only a smidgeon of cheese in them, and a bottle of lemonade. I know it ain’t much, but I thought it would be nice to have a bit of a picnic. It’s a shame about the rain, though.’

  Glenda smiled, a smile so warm that Frank immediately forgot about his cold hands. He laid his mac on the concrete floor for Glenda to sit on and shared out the sandwiches, which they eagerly ate.

  ‘Frank, I don’t care about the weather, and I’ve got to say, nobody has ever done anything like this for me before. It’s so lovely. Thank you.’ She leaned over to tenderly kiss Frank on the cheek.

  Frank knew he had turned red but he didn’t care. Everything felt so relaxed and carefree with Glenda and for a moment he was tempted to return her kiss, only this time passionately on her lips. Instead, he took her hand and said, ‘I’m enjoying this. It’s been great spending time with you and I hope you’ll agree to see me again.’

  ‘I shouldn’t, Frank. You know this is dangerous, but even so I would like to, very much. I know we’re only friends, but if we meet up we’ll still have to be careful and discreet.’

  From there in the small, elegantly designed bandstand, Frank could have sung out across Battersea Park. Glenda hadn’t said so out loud, but he could tell she liked him. If he could just persuade her to leave her brutish husband, then life would be pretty damned good …

  The rain had almost stopped as Glenda walked back through the park on her way home. A small glimmer of sunlight was breaking through the clouds and a large rainbow arched across the sky. For a short while she felt as if she was walking on air through a paradise.

  What a wonderful couple of hours, she thought, picturing Frank’s kind smile and remembering his cheery voice. It was wrong, she knew it was, yet even so Glenda couldn’t wait to see him again. We’re just friends, she told herself as if to ease her guilty conscience, while smiling like a village idiot as she recalled the kiss she had planted on his cheek.

  It had been a bold move to go and meet Frank and several times she had nearly backed out. She was glad that she hadn’t. Spending time with Frank was like a breath of fresh air. He was so easy to talk to, unlike her husband, whom she tiptoed around as if walking on eggshells. It was very different with Frank and she found it refreshing to be herself – the happy and carefree woman she had been before Harry had destroyed her.

  She passed through the wrought-iron black gates of the park but the closer she got to home, the more her heart sank and paranoid fears of Harry knowing who she had been with began to set in. Don’t be daft, she told herself. No one could have seen her; it had been tipping it down, so it was unlikely that anyone she knew would have been out in the park. Even if they had spotted her, she was absolutely entitled to take her child for a walk, wasn’t she? But could she really use Johnnie as a cover for her secret try
st? Yes, she thought to herself, she could – she had no other option if she was to see Frank again. They had arranged to meet the following week, which seemed like such a long time to wait, but in the meantime at least she could hold on to the memory of one of the best days of her life.

  As Glenda turned a corner she sneaked a glance behind her, knowing that Frank wouldn’t be too far behind, on his way home to the prefab down Sheepcote Lane that he shared with his mum and his brother. His brother, Billy Myers! Glenda hadn’t mentioned that she knew Billy when Frank had talked about how lucky they were to be alive after a doodlebug bomb had flattened their house during the war. His father hadn’t survived but Frank hadn’t sounded too bothered by that. It seemed there was no love lost between them. She hadn’t wanted Frank to know that it was partly because of his brother she had ended up in hospital. The whole time she had shared with Frank had been so magical; she didn’t want to spoil it by bringing up horrible things about Harry.

  When Glenda thought of Harry her stomach knotted again and, though there was still a bitter chill in the wind, small beads of nervous sweat broke out on her forehead. Harry wasn’t due home from work for a few hours, but she just couldn’t face going home yet. She wanted the feeling of euphoria never to end, so instead she decided to pop in to see Helen. As her parents lived next door to Helen, she could visit them too, but though her bruises had faded she wouldn’t be able to hide her missing teeth and broken nose from her father.

  Mrs Merton lived a few doors up from Helen’s house and sold homemade toffee apples. Glenda decided to purchase one for her mother as a little treat. She tapped three times on Mrs Merton’s front window, the signal for her to come and sell her apples. They were very popular with the locals and though everyone knew that Mrs Merton must have managed to acquire extra sugar on the black market, nobody minded as she sold her wares at a fair price and they were a rare treat for those who could spare the tuppence.