Uptown Girl

by Olivia Goldsmith

  The teen nodded and began taking orders from the line on the right. Billy looked at the children and gestured to the eight-year-old who had been crying. ‘Service first to the player who was body checked.’

  His dad brought the little boy up to the counter. Kate couldn’t help but glow. Billy leaned to the little boy. ‘What position do you play?’ he asked him.

  ‘Goalie,’ he replied, and looked at his father as if he wasn’t completely sure.

  ‘Your lucky day!’ Billy exclaimed. ‘Goalies get free cones! Wanna double scoop?’

  The teenager behind the counter gave him a look of ‘no way’. Billy ignored him, took out his wallet and placed it beside the ice cream tubs. ‘What’s it gonna be?’ The little boy asked for a vanilla cone with sprinkles and hooted with joy when he saw the double dipping he received. Billy moved to the next in the line.

  ‘What’s it gonna be?’ he asked.

  ‘A cup of chocolate with nuts and whip cream,’ the next kid said.

  ‘You got it. And it’s on me.’ Billy sprayed some of the aerosol cream on his shirt. ‘Get it? It’s on me.’

  The portion of the crowd that was up front laughed. Kate watched Billy with a combination of astonishment, awe and delight. When he took his next order, he smiled at the kid. ‘Position?’ Billy asked him.

  ‘Guard,’ the boy said proudly.

  ‘Whoa!’ Billy pretended to be taken aback. ‘Guards get free toppings.’

  ‘Wow!’ the boy cried. ‘Hey, Mom! I get a free topping.’

  Billy leaned over to Kate and gave her a quick kiss right below the ear.

  ‘What do I get?’ she asked him coyly.

  Billy was already busy making up a cone, but he looked up at her.

  ‘Depends on what position you play,’ Billy said and smiled.

  The thing about him, Kate thought, was that he knew the way things worked. He wasn’t a macho guy, but he was strong enough and confident enough to be willing to take chances.

  When the manager of the shop came from the back, leaving the booths and table behind, he took over from Billy. Thanking him, he insisted on giving Billy and Kate free cones. They were ridiculously large; Kate thought they each had four scoops, but Billy’s might have been five. As they finally made their way out of the sweet shop, Kate looked at Billy. ‘That was quite a scene, Mr Nolan,’ she said. ‘You’re a take-charge kinda guy.’

  ‘Hey, not much to expect from a bartender who’s dealt with bachelor parties,’ Billy said.

  ‘Well, you really managed that crowd.’

  Billy looked down at his cone, melting over his hand in the heat. ‘Yeah. If only I could manage my own ice cream.’

  ‘Okay. This I know how to do,’ Kate said and moved him over to a trash bin. She knocked two scoops off his cone and into the bin, did the same with her own, pulled a wet-nap out of her pocket, wiped his hand and then, with her finger, the last trace of whipped cream from his neck.

  ‘Hey, no fair,’ Billy said. ‘That was mine.’ Kate just smiled and put her cream-covered finger in her mouth. Billy gently took her hand and put her finger into his own mouth. Then he gently pushed her against the wall of the sweet shop and, keeping her left hand in his, lifted his arm and leaned into the wall, pressing his weight against her. Kate thought of Victorian heroines and how they ‘swooned’. She was feeling pretty swoony.

  ‘What do you call this position?’ he asked her, his voice low.

  At that moment the door of Jo’s opened and a bunch of kids streamed out. When a couple of them saw Billy they began making an incredible noise.

  ‘Exhibitionists,’ Kate told him and smiled.

  On the subway, the unruly park crowd pushed as the train doors opened. Kate was about to be crushed against a pole until Billy corralled her, placing her in the corner of the car against the front window. He protected her with his body but the intense crowding had the two of them pushed against one another. She was shocked when his hands disappeared under the back of the waistband of her jeans. He leaned forward to whisper in her ear. ‘What do you call this position?’

  ‘Tight. Very tight,’ she said.

  Back at Kate’s apartment, Billy slowly undressed her. She was surprised and touched by his tenderness: he took off her sandals as if she were a very young child. But as he worked his way up she felt that he considered her grown-up by the time he had unbuttoned her blouse. Then he was on top of her, kissing her neck and making his way to her breasts. He took each of her hands in his and held them beside her face on the pillow. He stopped to look at her. ‘And what do you call this position?’

  ‘Perfect,’ Kate whispered.

  38

  Despite his nose for news and Kate’s constant exposure to Elliot at school, she had managed not to raise his suspicions or start him questioning her on why her mood was so light. If he wrote it off to relief at her break-up with Michael, it was just as well. Kate and Elliot often fought and sometimes didn’t speak for a day or two, but they had never lied to one another and Kate did not want to set a precedent now. A sin of omission, however, was less than a fib. But Kate was afraid it was only a matter of time before Elliot sniffed her out. He was a Hound of the Baskervilles when it came to uncovering and bringing back his prey. Sooner or later, Elliot would discover the reason for her sunny disposition and, when he did, thunderclouds would gather.

  Kate stood in a patch of sunshine and watched the kids all around her. She reflected how lucky the children at Andrew Country Day were. Of course, they were lucky to have their material needs so well taken care of and parents rich enough to send them to a private school. But looking around her, Kate knew it was more than that. Andrew Country Day was one of the few city schools that had been able to maintain an almost campus-like setting. The two original old brick buildings formed an ‘L’ along the street and avenue sides of the block and the new extension – not nearly as architecturally interesting but covered in ivy and somewhat in keeping with the general look of the earlier buildings – formed a ‘U’ that allowed what would have been the individual buildings’ backyards to be joined in a large common garden. Part of it, of course, had been paved, but old trees, including a giant willow, and a beautiful border of manicured lawn gave the enclave the beauty and dignity of a New England college quad.

  She felt her first year had been successful, but wasn’t quite certain that Mr McKay and the board shared her view. When Michael had assumed she would drop her job it had made her realize her deep pleasure in it. The scene around her was so lovely and her work with the children so meaningful that she felt she couldn’t part with them. A small but dark voice within her whispered that she couldn’t be this happy in her private life without losing something in her professional one. Of course, she recognized it as superstitious nonsense, an old fear from her childhood that would probably always haunt her when things went well. She put the dark thought away.

  Kate was grateful to be part of it – the rambunctious children, the concerned staff, the involved parents. If Mr McKay was somewhat obsessive about the lawn and plantings, rather than the welfare of some of his charges, at least the staff recognized it and worked around it. No one was allowed to step on ‘his’ grass, though everyone ignored the rule except in his presence.

  The daffodils were long over, but roses and azaleas bloomed against the green of the ivy that covered two of the three walls that encircled the play area. A breeze made the glossy leaves move in a wave up and down the wall, almost like hundreds of green Rockettes doing a synchronized kick. Kate took a wisp of hair from her face and drew it back into her barrette. A group of fifth-grade girls sat on the grass in the sun, as languid and colorful as the women in a Monet painting. ‘Hi, Miss Jameson!’ Brian Conroy yelled as he – illegally – ran across the lawn. Kate didn’t have the heart to scold him. He looked, at least for the moment, happy as he ran, chasing two older boys who were leading a group of younger ones on a race, blowing off excess energy.

  The breeze died down and the sun grew wa
rmer. Kate took her sweater off, tied it around her shoulders and surveyed the schoolyard. Although she, as a psychologist rather than a teacher, rarely had playground duty and while it was usually despised, Kate was actually grateful for it today. The weather was beautiful and she felt too happy to sit indoors. It was also true that she was afraid to have lunch with Elliot because, knowing her as well as he did, he would easily be able to see her mood: why was it changed and immensely uplifted?

  Of course, infatuation would do that and she was definitely infatuated with Billy Nolan. If she wasn’t as mature as she was, she might have used another word instead of ‘infatuated’. But she wasn’t that much of a fool. It was simultaneously hard to believe that Billy cared about her as much as he seemed to or that he was merely acting. His string of relationships – if you could call them that – certainly didn’t bode well for anything serious with him, but the intensity and depth of their conversations and the even deeper intensity of their love-making made her believe there was something special going on. Of course, if she allowed herself to think about it too much, doubts and questions crept in. Was she deluding herself about Billy being the right sort of man for her? Was she in fact slumming? How could she go back to her roots, to everything she had run from? Brooklyn, alcohol, Irish men, dysfunctional families.

  She admitted now that she had been attracted to Billy from the moment she met him on the terrace at the wedding. All through the spring she had tried to ignore the strength of that feeling as well as the conviction that it was mutual and, though she did not like to think about his relationship with Bina, not to mention the Bitches, everything had turned out well. Jack’s proposal had come. Bina was convinced that it was because of Billy, but Kate knew that Jack must have missed her sweetness and their shared history. And perhaps Max had put in a word or two about Bina’s ‘explorations’. Whatever it was, Bina was so busy with wedding preparations that she wouldn’t discover Kate’s secret liaison.

  Kate didn’t know whether Elliot really believed that any woman who dated Billy Nolan would, once dumped, receive a proposal of marriage, but what she did know was that she neither wanted to be dumped by him nor proposed to by anybody else.

  The school year was coming to a close and while it had been uncomfortably hot earlier in the week, the weather had cooled down and today was as perfect as the weather ever got in Manhattan. Kate kept watch over the children, running and playing in front of her, and smiled. It was almost like watching sea water eddy in tide pools – the children’s allegiances, posses and games changed at different rates, making swirls of motion that were faster in one corner, slower in the middle, and stagnant at one side. Kate actually raised her brows at that. Whenever the children stayed clustered in one place, Kate knew from experience, there was the possibility of trouble. Last week they had found a dead pigeon and only Elliot’s intervention had prevented the fourth-grade boys from flinging it at the girls. She walked toward the gathering but before she got close, the group, who had been arranging some game, dispersed and the children ran off in twos and threes. All was well. No decomposing pigeon.

  Again her hair escaped from its mooring and blew across her face. As she grabbed it, her fingers brushed her jaw line in exactly the way Billy’s had stroked it just hours ago. A little shiver ran down her back and she felt a flutter in her stomach. Sleeping with him had been so extraordinary, so passionate but tender, that thinking about it seemed dangerous – Kate was afraid that she might remember that it was all a dream and have to awake to a much colder reality.

  But it wasn’t a dream. Her time with Billy seemed to get better and deeper with every encounter. Kate, a survivor of plenty of adversity, not only empathized with the way Billy had coped and overcome his own difficulties, especially his speech disability, but also admired him for it. Underneath the fun and the joking, Kate felt sure Billy was courageous and good-hearted. He had cleverly summoned up or learned the skills needed to survive, but he didn’t seem to have been hardened or made cynical by his experiences. She wasn’t slumming, she told herself, ashamed she had ever thought that. She wasn’t a snob. Billy Nolan was educated, well-read, bilingual and owned and ran a business. Who was she to judge him harshly?

  Kate walked over to the willow, but didn’t take a seat on the bench beside it. It was well known that Mr McKay frowned on staff sitting down when on playground duty. So, instead, she leaned one hand against the bench, picked up a tendril of the willow in the other and again lifted her face to the sun. It amazed her how life could change in such sudden profound ways. She felt, for once, like one of the lucky ones, one of the people in the world that things work out for, a being who could simply exist and breathe warm, summer air without struggling. She felt as if everything she wanted would come to her.

  Although she wasn’t sure she wanted Mr McKay, when Kate turned her head she saw him scuttling toward her on the flagstone path across the lawn. Kate straightened and the bit of the willow wand still in her hand broke off. She hadn’t talked to him since she’d called in her absence that morning she woke in Billy’s bed. The thought made her blush.

  ‘Dr Jameson,’ Mr McKay began, ‘I’ve been wanting to talk to you.’ Kate felt another flutter, but this one was not nearly so pleasant. Was he going to criticize her for daydreaming, or for neglecting to scold the girls who were sitting on the lawn despite the interdict against it? Worse yet, was he about to reject her contract renewal? Was the small, dark voice the voice of truth?

  But Mr McKay looked at her with something approaching a smile and, to her relief, ignored his precious sod. ‘I’m glad I caught you here,’ he said and for a moment his voice sounded almost cordial. ‘Your contract is up for renewal and the board and I would like to extend it.’ He paused. ‘We feel that you are becoming an important part of the Andrew Country Day School tradition.’

  Kate wasn’t sure about any tradition she fulfilled but she was sincerely delighted by the offer. ‘Thank you,’ she said. ‘I’m very happy here and I hope I’m making a contribution.’

  McKay nodded, his face once again poker-straight as if he had lost all his cordiality chips. ‘Good. Vera will have your renewal contract.’ As he walked away, Kate watched his narrow back and managed to feel some affection for him, even when he waved the fifth-grade girls off the lawn.

  The bell rang, the children began to line up and Kate was freed to go back to her office. But on the way down the hall, Elliot appeared at his classroom door.

  ‘Are you trying to avoid me?’ he asked.

  ‘No, of course not.’ She lied like a rug.

  ‘Look, I figured it out. I know who your mystery man is and why you’re embarrassed to tell me.’

  ‘Shh,’ Kate said. For God’s sake. They were in the hallway of the school. Anyone could hear. ‘Come into my office,’ she told him, but she was filled with dread. She was going to be busted and Elliot would tell everyone, and Brooklyn would be abuzz with the news that she, Dr Katherine Sean Jameson, had stooped to a Brooklyn bartender. Worse, that she was taking him seriously. Once in the office, Elliot closed the door and she turned to face him.

  ‘I figured it out,’ Elliot repeated, complacently. ‘It’s Max. You’re sleeping with Max and you’re embarrassed. But there’s nothing wrong with him. I’ve always thought he was kinda hot, myself. It might be a little awkward after you end it since he lives just upstairs, but any port in the storm.’

  For a moment Kate was tempted to agree with him. But she simply couldn’t lie to a friend as close as Elliot was to her.

  ‘Okay. What is it?’ Elliot asked.

  ‘Mr McKay wants to renew my contract,’ Kate told him.

  ‘That’s not what I’m talking about.’ Elliot stopped her and looked her over. ‘You’re seeing him, aren’t you?’ he said accusingly.

  Once again Kate felt her complexion betray her. As the blush flooded her cheeks, she turned her eyes away from her best friend’s. ‘Yes,’ she said.

  ‘Oh, for God’s sake. You really are a masochist,
’ he cried. ‘Kate, is it like childbirth or something? Don’t you remember the pain Steven put you through? Don’t tell me you’re sleeping with him again. You promised me it wasn’t him.’

  Kate looked him straight in the eye. ‘It isn’t,’ she said. ‘I wouldn’t dream of it. I’m sleeping with Billy Nolan.’

  For a minute, Elliot was stunned into silence. Then he shook his head. ‘You little sneak. I should have known you were up to something,’ he said. ‘I thought, well, I suspected you might be thinking of that idiot, Steven. But no, you have to sniff out worse trouble. And I didn’t think there could be worse trouble than Steven Kaplan.’

  Kate, who thought she was prepared for Elliot’s anger, was taken aback. ‘You don’t even know Billy,’ she said. ‘To you he’s some kind of magic charm, some statistical improbability.’

  ‘And what is he to you? A good bonk? Because that would be all he is good for.’

  Kate felt herself go livid, and the blood that, for once, drained from her face actually made her almost dizzy with anger. ‘I appreciate your concern,’ she said, her voice cold. ‘But I don’t think you know what you’re talking about.’

  ‘Right! I haven’t been around for the last ten years to witness and dissect every bump and curve in your so-called love life. You forget who you’re talking to, Kate.’ He pointed to the drawings on her walls. Many of them new – farewell gifts from children who would not see her until the autumn. ‘You want to mess up your life?’ Elliot asked, his voice lowered. ‘I’ve watched you grow in the last year. Michael might not be right for you but he was stable and a professional and probably a good father-to-be.’ He moved closer to her but Kate pulled away. If he touched her, she was afraid she might slap his hand away.

  ‘You’re being unfair and horrible,’ she said and realized she sounded like a child. She took a deep breath. She knew she owed a lot to Elliot: his loyalty, his friendship, his help in graduate school and his assistance in getting her this job that she loved. But it didn’t give him the right to judge her and judge Billy in this way. ‘You don’t understand,’ she said.