Ruined: A Contemporary Bad Boy Romance

by Lisa Lace

  How could I risk falling in love again?

  Was I really free to love at all?

  Tonight is the night.

  It was dark in my apartment, only the street lamps outside offering any light at all. I could have made the decision to get up and turn on the lights, but I kind of liked the way the darkness held us. In the dark, I could clearly hear Nate’s breathing growing husky with desire.

  His eyes were fixed on mine, and there was an intensity there that I’d never seen before in the eyes of any man. A hunger.

  He said nothing, only moved closer. I bit down on my lip.

  He opened my silk blouse with his kisses, and his fingers slipped into my panties.

  I let my head fall back and breathed out a sigh.

  Tonight is the night.

  Nate

  I was relieved when the engine swung into the station on the main street. It had been one hell of a fire, and I was glad to put it behind me. I stepped out of the jump seat area with Sam and Lewis. All of us were blackened by the soot of a grease fire still sticking to our skin which was covered in sweat from the heat of the flames. I felt weighed down by my protective gear. I’d already taken off the jacket and rolled my shoulders a few times to loosen my muscles. I reached out to pick up my helmet from the bench to put it back into place.

  “Man, I am glad to be back,” Sam whistled. “I never thought that sucker was gonna die down.”

  “Good thing old man decided to take his nap upstairs. The living room armchair was pretty much in ashes by the time we were done.”

  “It might not have happened if he’d had the sense to watch the damned pan. I will never cease to be amazed by folks’ stupidity.”

  “Cut him some slack, Sam. He was an old fella and probably forgot all about it.”

  “His family should be watching him, then. You can’t let old guys with poor memories leave grease on the stove. They nearly lost the whole farmhouse.”

  “They’re good people. I’ve known the Rogers family a long time. John used to be one hell of a farmer back in the day. It’s a shame how time has caught up with him.”

  It had felt strange to be the one to pick John up in a fireman’s carry, slung over my shoulders like he weighed nothing. When I was younger, it had been the other way around. The Rogers’ family farm was on the same stretch as the house where I grew up. I remembered how John had carried me into the cabin of his tractor for rides.

  Times change.

  I looked around the engine bay and felt myself relax. The place had been a second home for almost eight years now. We had three engines in our station and answered calls between Brayford and Fort Wayne. Even in our small corner of the world, there always seemed to be someone having an emergency — a car accident, a fall, a fire.

  At least it kept us busy.

  * * *

  “Hell-o-o!”

  I recognized the voice and couldn’t help but smile. Sam’s girl, Carla, was here.

  She was the biggest flirt in Brayford, and I had my suspicions that she’d chosen the location of her coffee shop for one reason only. Every time I looked over my shoulder when in the station, I saw her glued to the window, watching us with her tongue practically hanging out her mouth.

  Carla was an attractive woman, but not my type. I’d known her for years. She’d always called herself a “free spirit,” but that was just her way of giving herself permission to chase every boy in town. She wasn’t the sort of woman who ever had trouble getting a date, with vibrant red hair that caught the sun like a flame and lips that spoke only of trouble.

  She’d always had a certain allure about her, and that appeal was only heightened by her unusual amount of confidence. Once, I’d been drawn in by her aura. Now, I only found it tiring.

  I’d thought Carla might tone it down a bit when she and Sam finally got together, but I guess old habits die hard. She’d been sashaying over here with one-liners and teasing play on words for years. She still couldn’t resist making her presence known in the station in a short skirt and ankle-high boots that showed her legs for miles.

  Her flirtatious nature didn’t bother Sam. He liked having a woman that made jaws drop.

  “Boys, I’ve got something tasty right here for you. Oh, and I brought some muffins, too.” Carla laughed loudly at her own joke as she handed over the tray to Sam. He pulled her toward him and kissed her on the head.

  “Careful, Carla. You might make me jealous.”

  “You have nothing to worry about, Sam. Nate’s been fending me off for years. I don’t think I’ll ever break him.” She threw a mischievous grin my way and winked.

  I laughed. “I guess we’ll never know.”

  Carla turned to Sam. “Honey, you better get those to the kitchen before Lewis scoffs them all. Last time I brought treats over for the boys, nobody else got a chance to have one.”

  “All right, babe.”

  Sam gave Carla an unnecessarily long open-mouth kiss and grinned as he walked away. Carla watched him leave with her eyes gleaming. She sighed a happy sigh and leaned against the engine. “Isn’t it nice when the things you dream of turn out even better than you imagined?”

  I followed her gaze. Sam was disappearing out of the engine bay and into the main building of the station. “Yeah. He’s a good guy.”

  Carla turned to me, and I knew she was up to something before she’d even opened her mouth. She had a look on her face like she was about to spill gossip or about to try and set me up. Or both.

  “So, Nate…”

  “I’m not interested, Carla.”

  “You haven’t even heard what I’m going to say.”

  “I think I can guess. You know a woman I should be dating.”

  “She’s a preschool teacher’s assistant and moved into my building.” Carla frowned and placed her hands on her hips with a pout. “At least let me tell you about her.”

  “It won’t make a difference, Carla. I’m not looking for a woman right now.”

  “She’s gorgeous, Nate. She has big brown eyes and beautiful hair. She’s got a stunning figure, just like Scarlett Johansson. Single. New to town.”

  “Oh yeah? And how did you meet a stunning celebrity look-alike? If she just moved into your building, it seems a little early to be looking for a date already.”

  “Well, not exactly.”

  “Carla! C’mon. Cut it out. We’re not teenagers anymore. Having a girlfriend isn’t the be all and end all. I’ve got other priorities. You know that.”

  “I think you’re wasting your good looks.”

  I laughed. Carla didn’t mince her words. She’d told me I was handsome for years. She’d always said she liked a man with muscle.

  I’d never had trouble attracting women. I worked out a lot to keep in shape for my job, and I took care of my appearance. Over the years, I’d dealt with many Carlas.

  This one had been the first woman to swoon over me. Carla and I had gone to high school together. Carla had been at my heels since I was eighteen. We’d made out once or twice when we were young, but it never turned into anything serious. We grew up and grew apart. When she got her shop across the street, she tried to start something again, but I was with Marie by then. It had been a relief when she’d finally switched her attention to Sam. It was exhausting holding her off. Not that Sam had ever tried — during all the years Carla had been trailing behind me, he’d been pining after her. Now they were together at last and acting like love-struck teens, unable to keep their hands off each other.

  “I’m happy as I am.”

  “She’s a really sweet woman, Nate. Kinda quiet, but I think she’s got a good sense of humor and her priorities are straight. You never did like ditzy girls.”

  “How about I say I’ll think about it, huh?”

  Sam returned from the kitchen, munching on one of the blueberry muffins Carla always pretended she baked. Sam had let me in on the secret that she bought them wholesale, but she didn’t know I was onto her.

  “What are
we talking about?”

  “I was telling Nate about a gorgeous woman who just moved into my building.”

  “Maybe work’s not the best place for matchmaking, babe.” He gave me a sympathetic smile, and I sighed.

  I knew the look. It was a mixture of pity and understanding. Sam always intended to be kind, but often came off to me as patronizing. Marie’s death had been the topic of conversation for many days in a small town. It happened three years ago. It was impossible to get on with life when everybody knew every detail of your tragedy. I still heard groups of people stop talking as soon as I walked by. I was always seeing people tilt their heads and giving me a kindly smile like I was a lost child.

  It drove me mad.

  Out the corner of my eye, I saw Sam giving Carla a warning frown. She pursed her lips and sighed. She laid her hand on my chest as she passed by and paused a moment, making sure to catch my eye. “Think about it, Nate. She seems real nice.”

  “I will.”

  Carla left, and Sam made himself scarce rubbing down the engine and checking the equipment. He knew he’d get nothing out of me in conversation. I didn’t talk about Marie anymore.

  She was gone, and life went on.

  Still, Carla had left my thoughts turning as I looked around at my crew and wiped the soot from my hands with a rag. Lewis was older — in his forties — and had been married for years. As soon as it was time to clock out, he started telling me what his wife had prepared for his dinner with a satisfied smile like his life was good. Sam looked just as happy with his lot when he’d give me a wink and tell me Carla was waiting for him at the end of the day.

  It made me wonder if I was missing out on something. Marie’s image flickered across my mind, and I blinked it back and pushed her memory down. I glanced at the clock. It was nearly time for our continuing education medical training session. After that, there was paperwork to do and engines to maintain. I still had to get cleaned up after the fire.

  Life went on and didn’t care if I was ready.

  Jenna

  “Need a hand, honey?”

  I struggled to keep my grip on the cardboard box in my arms as I nudged open the door of my new apartment building. I’d been driving for a day and a half across Pennsylvania and then Ohio to reach Brayford, Indiana, a small town not far from Fort Wayne. I was exhausted, and looking back to my car and the few boxes scattered on the backseat, it hardly seemed worth all the effort.

  I managed to get into the apartment lobby and groaned when I saw the elevator was out of service. My apartment was on the fifth floor, and it felt like my arms were going to fall off. I shifted the weight of the box up my body, worried that the bottom was about to fall apart.

  Peering around the edge of the box, I realized the offer to help came from the friendly face of the red-headed woman who had entered the building after me. She reached out to balance the box I carried.

  “Thanks!”

  The stranger smiled sympathetically. “Moving in, huh?”

  “Right.”

  “Where you come from?”

  “Out of state.”

  “Which apartment are you in?”

  “5D.”

  “That’s a bit of a climb.” She looked back over her shoulder at the stairs behind us and let out a long breath. “Today must be your lucky day. I’ve got nothing but time. Come on, I’ll help you get moved in.”

  “Really? Are you sure?”

  She waved away my concerns with a perfectly manicured hand. “Of course! I’m Carla, by the way.”

  “Jenna.”

  Together, we managed to get the six boxes and two suitcases into my apartment without too much trouble. We tossed everything together in the middle of the living room, and my pile of belongings made the small apartment look absolutely bare. The little pile of luggage was a stark reminder that I was starting with nothing.

  “Is that everything?” Carla asked.

  “Yes. Thanks so much for your help. I don’t think I’d have been able to do it on my own.”

  “No problem. That’s what good neighbors are for, right?”

  “Which apartment are you in?”

  “Just down the hall. 5F.”

  I smiled and pushed back my hair from my flushed face. I leaned against the small tower of boxes we’d created and let out a long breath. “It’s nice to find a friendly face so soon.”

  “Do you know anyone in the area?” Carla asked. I shook my head, and Carla raised her eyebrows with interest. “What brings you to Brayford, then? We’re a small town. Not many people choose to set up house here without having a connection to the place.”

  She was right. It was a real small town, the sort people romanticize over and set Christmas films in. It seemed like everybody knew everybody else and most of the inhabitants had been born and raised here. I was trying to find a low-key existence in a quieter part of the country, but I guess I hadn’t thought about what a big deal that might be to the people already living there.

  “I’ve got a job here.”

  “Oh, really? That’s great! What’s the job?”

  “I’m going to be working at one of the preschools. The one on Edison Street.”

  Carla clapped her hands together and smiled. “That’s next to my coffee shop! If you’re walking, you’ll pass right by it.”

  “You own a coffee shop?”

  “She’s my baby. I love that place. I feel like such a fly on the wall in there. You wouldn’t believe what people talk about over coffee! I’m the eyes and ears of this town.”

  I laughed and took a longer look at Carla. She must have been about my own age —twenty-nine. She was a very attractive and vibrant woman. Her hair was like copper and bounced in curls off her shoulders. She wore tightly fitted blue jeans and a T-shirt that showed off her tiny waist. Her arms were covered almost wrist-to-elbow in bangles and bracelets, and she always wore a warm, wide smile.

  I liked her already.

  “All that lifting got me hot!” she exclaimed. “Do you want to come over to my apartment for some tea? It’s been chilling all day. Ice cold.”

  “I’d love to.”

  I locked my apartment and followed Carla to her place. She opened the door, and I was instantly hit by the contrast of a lived-in home overflowing with pictures, mementos, ornaments, and trinkets. Carla must have been part magpie because every shelf, surface, and counter held a dozen little souvenirs or decorations. Snow globes, glass antelopes, small hoops bearing cross-stitches, four dream catchers hanging from one wall, succulent plants on every windowsill, a bright discarded bangle everywhere you looked… Her home was alive with bright and pretty things. In place of drapes over her windows, she’d fashioned her own privacy from sheets printed with mandalas and vivid geometric patterns that cast colored shadows on the hardwood floors. The place smelled of incense and freshly brewed coffee.

  Carla headed for the kitchen. Her apartment was laid out the same as mine, with the main door opening into the living room with a kitchen through an archway to the left and the bedroom and bathroom down a small hall to the right. Two large windows in the living room overlooked a quiet street. I couldn’t hear traffic or anything from up here.

  It was peaceful.

  “Make yourself at home!” Carla called back over her shoulder. I heard her open the refrigerator. “Iced tea on its way. You must be parched. How long was your trip?”

  “A day and a half. I didn’t leave until yesterday evening, and I stopped at a motel for the night. I could have done it in a day if I pushed myself.”

  “Where’d you say you were from again?”

  I hesitated. I wasn’t sure how much I wanted to reveal to someone I just met, but then again, I didn’t want to draw attention to myself by not having anything to say. I decided to answer honestly. “Pennsylvania. Johnstone.”

  “Johnstone, huh? That’s a pretty big town compared to here.” Carla returned with the iced tea in a pitcher and two glasses on a tray. She laid them down on a little coffee t
able and sat next to me on the sofa where I’d taken a seat. She poured me a glass and handed it over. “What do you think you’ll make of small town living?”

  I smiled. “I grew up in a small town, actually. I’m looking forward to getting back to that kind of life. Simpler.”

  Carla let out a wicked laugh. “Is life anywhere simple? You’ll always find drama wherever you go. The gossip I could spill about this place would make your head spin! Just you wait until you get to know some of the parents of those kids you’ll be teaching. I bet I’ve got a story on every single one.” She took a long drink from her glass and placed it back on the table. “You said you’re a preschool teacher, right?”

  “A preschool teacher’s assistant. I started my early childhood education degree. I’m hoping I’ll be able to transfer the credits to a college up here so I can finish it up.”

  “Good for you!” Carla kicked off her flat shoes and pulled her feet up under her, twirling the chain of a long pendant necklace in her hand. “I never got that far with school. My mom always told me to spend less time drooling over boys and more time studying, but I never listened.” She laughed lightly. “Didn’t work out too bad in the end, though. I drool over men for a living now.”

  “What do you mean?”

  Carla leaned forward like she had something juicy to tell me. She licked her lips and raised her eyebrows vivaciously. “I’ve got the best-damned spot for a coffee shop in the whole of Indiana. Right across from the fire station. Firefighters all — day — long...” She drew out the last few words like she enjoyed the taste of them. “I’m the envy of every hot-blooded woman in Brayford. In fact, I think the view is half the reason I sell so much coffee.”

  I laughed. “You sound like one lucky woman.”

  She leaned back again with a mischievous grin and let out a long sigh. “Actually, I’m not supposed to be drooling over them anymore. Not now I’ve bagged one, anyhow.”

  “One of the firefighters?”