The Agent's Surrender

by Kimberly Van Meter

  She nodded. “Sometimes a California King just isn’t big enough,” she said with a bright smile. Damn, she was good at this game. “You better shower because we have an appointment at Butterfly Bend in an hour and it’s at least a 45-minute drive from here.”

  He swore under his breath, then burned his tongue with hot coffee. “You couldn’t have made an afternoon appointment? Jeez, Fallon, give a guy a chance to recover.”

  “No rest for the wicked, right?”

  He had no response. Frankly, he didn’t trust himself not to be rude. Maybe a shower would do him some good. Except when he stood under the spray he couldn’t help but remember the last shower he shared with Jane, and suddenly it was hard to focus on anything aside from his raging erection. He pushed at his shaft, irritated. Nothing was gonna happen there. Down, boy. Think of baseball, grandmothers or the fact that Jane wasn’t the least bit interested in picking up where they’d left off. Yeah, that ought to be a good-enough libido killer. He scrubbed down and got out of the shower. Taking little time to dress, he reappeared, hair wet but ready to work.

  “You take a longer shower that most girls I know,” Jane said, frowning. “What did you do in there, shave your legs?” She grabbed her keys and gestured. “Let’s go. We’re losing time.”

  “And you think you’re driving?” he asked, incredulously. “If we’re going to get there on time, I’d better drive.”

  Jane was such a stickler for the rules that she stuck religiously to the speed limit. He, on the other hand, treated each destination as a finish line. But Jane wasn’t about to budge.

  “I would like to arrive alive. How you even have a license is beyond me.”

  Holden had no choice but to follow. The only consolation was the nice view of Fallon’s backside as they left his building. “So you really slept good last night?” he asked.

  “Like a baby.”

  Like a baby, he mimicked in his head as he climbed into the car. Of course she had. Holden punched the address in the GPS and they were on their way. Jane’s sensible Honda Accord was exactly the kind of car he’d imagined Jane would drive. It got good gas mileage, was luxurious to a point, but not overly so, and had a sensible price point. He chuckled at his own observation, which caused her to look at him sharply.

  “What was that for?”

  “Nothing. I was just thinking this car suits you.”

  She relaxed. “Yeah? It’s a good car. Consumer Reports lists it as one of the most reliable cars in its class.”

  “I bet it does.” He smirked. “Let me guess...top speed is eighty miles per hour.”

  “Not that I would need to drive eighty for any reason—we’re not on an autobahn. It does have a V6, you know. But why would I need to drive faster than the speed limit? Do you think I have a death wish?”

  He barked a laugh. “Jane, live a little, why don’t you? There’s a whole world waiting for you when you decide to go crazy.”

  “You can keep crazy. I prefer stability and reliability.”

  He winced. “Are you a granny? And how is it that you work for the federal government with your low tolerance for risk?”

  “Can we talk about something other than personal things? Let’s talk about the case,” she suggested almost desperately. “I was thinking last night when I couldn’t fall asleep that there has to be a connection between Trevor and Penny other than being cousins. The fact that Miko referenced the winery tells me there’s something there because why else would Miko mention something so obscure?”

  “I thought you said you slept like a baby,” he reminded her, latching on to the one thing that mattered to him at the moment. “Maybe you should’ve stayed with me like I suggested.”

  “Do you seriously have a one-track mind? Can we please stay on topic?”

  He sighed, annoyed he was so easily pushed aside. “Yeah, sure. I was just saying that, you know, it might have been nice.... Forget it.”

  “I told you we can’t do what we did in California. You and I both know it’s a huge mistake, and I’m not doing anything to jeopardize this case. I’m surprised you’re fighting me on this. Why are you so hurt that I don’t want a relationship with you?”

  “Hurt? Who said I’m hurt?” he repeated, indignant. “You’re right—we should just stick to the case.”

  “Thank you. Now you’re making sense. All right, so here’s the deal—I say we question this Trevor Granger and find out why Miko would’ve been aware of Trevor and Penny’s relationship. And in the meantime, I wonder if we could get James to do some more poking around.”

  “Such as?”

  “Such as taking a look around the Department of Defense and see if they are holding on to anything beyond our pay grade.”

  Holden whistled in appreciation. “I take it back. You do like to live dangerously. So you’re saying we should set James on the trail that might lead to the Department of Defense’s doorstep? Essentially hacking into a government mainframe? That might take more than twenty grand. Are you footing this bill?”

  “He might be willing to do it just for fun. His type love the opportunity to hack into government mainframes. It’s like a badge of honor,” she said. “But I guess we can wait and see what we find out on our own before we tap that resource.”

  “It’s worth keeping in our pocket for plan B,” Holden said, eyeing her with deeper appreciation, not only for her sexy body, but also for her incredibly sexy brain. He angled himself toward her. “Listen, I know we said we wouldn’t talk about personal stuff, but you have to admit there’s still a spark between us.”

  “Obviously. That’s not the point, though. Neither one of us is suited for a relationship with the other. Why complicate matters when there’s no need?”

  “Maybe I like complicated.”

  She made an exasperated noise. “That’s the problem—I don’t. It’s just easier to keep things professional between us.”

  “Easy is boring. And you don’t want boring. You’re the kind of woman who needs a challenge or else you stagnate in your own rigid personality. My guess is before your dad made you dance to his tune, you were less buttoned-down.”

  “What makes you say that?”

  “Because I’ve seen your wild side, and there’s no way that sexy woman came out of nowhere. She’s just been on lockdown for far too long.”

  Jane risked a small smile, but she smothered it quickly enough to drop a bomb on him. “Listen, I didn’t want to do this, but the bottom line is this—you’ll never be good enough in the eyes of my family. Even before this situation with Miko blew up, you had no cred with my dad. He has a certain standard, and you don’t live up to it. I’m sorry. It’s harsh, but those are the facts. I’m not going to spend my entire life defending you against my family or fighting with family over you.”

  Ouch. He felt as if she’d just delivered a roundhouse kick to his nuts. And what the hell? He wasn’t good enough? How much more cred did he need? “Last time I checked I was a pretty good catch,” he told her, his temper rising. “Highly decorated marine, level VI security clearance in the CIA and built like a Mack truck. I don’t see the problem.”

  “I love your enthusiasm and confidence, but it has nothing to do with your qualifications per se. It has everything to do with the way my family perceives you.”

  “I’m confused. Are you saying it’s not me, it’s your family?”

  “Sort of.”

  “Oh, good. For a second I thought you were throwing up imaginary obstacles.” He rolled his eyes as his voice dripped with sarcasm. Unbelievable. He was considered a good catch by most standards. Except to the one person he wanted to impress, for some stupid reason. “Listen, just admit to me that you and I shared something pretty incredible, and I’ll leave it at that.”

  “You’ll drop it?”

  “Sure,” he lied. Drop it? He was going to gnaw on that sucker like a dog with a bone. But his ego demanded she tell the truth. “Just admit I rocked your world and we’ll go back to being simply partner
s without benefits.”

  She drew a deep breath and blew it out in a long exhale. “Okay, Holden. We have chemistry. Real, visceral, unexplainable chemistry, and this weekend was a brutal reminder that we are desperately good together. Is that what you want to hear? Well, I’ll do you a solid and go a step further. The reason I couldn’t sleep last night was because I was thinking of what we did together and how I already missed the feeling of you beside me. It that enough? Does that help? Because frankly, I think it makes it worse.”

  The tight band of tension cording his chest loosened and he could actually breathe again. As long as she was fighting the same fight he was, there was a chance. A chance at what, he wasn’t sure, but he wanted to find out. “Yeah, it’ll do.” He didn’t even try to smother the grin. “Now, tell me again why we shouldn’t be partners with benefits?”

  “You’re impossible,” she growled, and shot him an extremely irritated look. She switched on the radio and effectively shut him out. “From now on, no more talking.”

  * * *

  What was his problem? Why did he care what her family thought of him? Jane was baffled by Holden’s reaction, but even more so by the pinch she felt in her conscience for hurting his feelings. They’d shared a whirlwind of good times until it’d come grinding to a halt, which had been the wake-up call she had needed to put her head back on straight. The memory of ending it popped into her mind as she drove, and she lingered a little too long, because within seconds she was back in that wretched moment.

  “What do you mean, you’re ending things?” Holden had demanded to know, standing apart from her, pissed as hell and more than a little hurt. “This is crap and you know it. Everything was going fine until your dad got involved.”

  “And who got him involved?” she had shot back, still mad at him for thinking he knew how to handle the situation with her father better than her. “I told you to back off, but you refused and did whatever you thought was necessary and it blew up in our faces. Well, congrats—this is your reward!”

  “You’re punishing me for trying to talk to your dad for us?” he’d asked with open incredulity. “That’s rich, Fallon. Totally rich. Remind me never to do you a solid ever again.”

  “Oh, don’t try to delude yourself into thinking you did that for me. It was all about you. The charming Holden Archangelo thought he could bamboozle my father into liking him and it went sour. End of story.”

  “Believe what you want, but I did it for you! It’s not natural for you to live under your father’s thumb for the rest of your life. For crying out loud, Fallon, you’re still balancing his damn checkbook!”

  “There’s nothing wrong with that,” she’d said stubbornly, though she had tried to talk her father into hiring an accountant. The Major had shut her down pretty quickly, saying he couldn’t trust strangers with his finances. Then when she’d tried to enlist the help of her brothers, The Major had shut her down on that score, too, saying Ian and Walker were too busy to handle an extra assignment. “If you were close to your father, Holden, you’d understand. My dad needs me and I enjoy being able to help.”

  “No, you crave that tiny pat on the head that he doles out like a miser with his gold,” Holden had returned, and her cheeks had burned with the insult because it was partly true. Even though she was overloaded with responsibilities, it gave her a small amount of pleasure knowing her father valued her help in this one way. He still managed to find fault each time, which always put a damper on the meager amount of satisfaction she received for the work. Holden must’ve peeked inside her brain because he’d then said, “See? Even you know it’s true. When are you going to start living your life for you instead of everyone else? What about your brothers? Do they beg for your father’s approval before they date someone?”

  “No,” she’d answered, her cheeks burning even hotter. “My dad doesn’t seem to care who they date.”

  “Why? Because somehow they’re perfect judges of character? And if that’s so, why can’t they trust your judgment?”

  “Stop it!” She’d clapped her hands over her ears, unable to listen to another minute of Holden punching holes in her life. Everything he’d said rang with truth, but she hadn’t been ready to burn down the house just because the roof leaked a little. “I don’t tell you how to be with your family, so shut the hell up. I don’t even know why you’re so upset about my ending things. I thought you were the perennial bachelor? This should be a blessing. You ought to be thanking me for letting you off the hook. I mean, c’mon, Holden, what did you think? That we were going to run off and get married or something? We were just sleeping together. That’s it. And now it’s over.”

  Holden had held her stare, his mouth a tight line of frustrated anger, but there had been hurt in his eyes. It had been the secret pain he was trying to hide that had twisted her heart. She’d done that. She’d put that look in his eyes. And a part of her mourned her own actions, but if her father had taught her anything, it was how to make the hard choice with a stiff upper lip. Thanks, Dad.

  “So you really didn’t sleep well last night,” Holden asked, breaking into her thoughts. She was so grateful to be out of her own head that she answered truthfully.

  “Yeah, too many memories. Both good and bad,” she admitted. “I feel as if I only got a few winks. Reminds me of when I was stationed in Iraq. That was a bloody awful time.”

  “Iraq is a dusty bowl of insurgent nightmares. I spent a tour there. Then I got shipped off to Afghanistan for another crap detail that nearly got my ass shot off.”

  She smiled in weary commiseration. “It feels like that. I swear I have sand in my eyes.” He reached over and massaged the back of her neck, gently squeezing the muscles holding up her head, and she groaned. “That felt awesome,” she said with a sigh, just for a moment enjoying the simple pleasure. Jane cast Holden a brief smile and he smiled back, igniting tiny bubbles in her stomach. She shook her head. “You’re a hard habit to break,” she murmured, mostly to herself, but Holden heard and chuckled.

  “Glad to hear it. Soothes my bruised ego a little.”

  Funny how the little sleep she’d managed with Holden had been wholly satisfying, yet the eight hours she had supposedly gotten last night made her feel as if she’d slept only two winks. She refused to believe it was anything more than wild, crazy attraction between two people who were turned on by the forbidden aspect of their relationship. What other option was there? Was she falling in love with Holden? Goodness gracious, she hoped not. She didn’t need that complication. Maybe it wasn’t love but simply the draw of a forbidden relationship. Maybe she was a bit of a bad girl. Maybe a latent naughtiness inside of her was spurring her to do things outside of her nature. That must be the answer, because ever since Holden had been thrown into her life, she’d been doing and saying things that were so far afield of what she would ever say or do she almost didn’t recognize herself. The weird part? She kind of liked it. She liked this feeling of having no rules, or better yet, saying screw the rules and just going for it. Her grip tightened on the steering wheel. Yes, sometimes rule breaking was fun. Especially if it was with Holden. But right now they had a case to figure out. And she had a feeling they were only scratching the surface of something really bad.

  Chapter 16

  They pulled off the highway and found themselves on a long winding road that carved through the scenic mountainside cloaked in the bitter cold of winter. “It’s a little creepy, yet beautiful at the same time,” she observed. “I’ve never actually heard of a winery in Washington. Aren’t most wineries in California?”

  “Your guess is as good as mine. I’m not exactly a wine drinker. I prefer beer myself.”

  “Me, too.”

  Holden flashed her a grin as they pulled into the winery parking lot. “All right, let’s see what this winery dude has to tell us,” he said as they climbed from the car.

  An imposing rock-and-brick building rose from the ground, the design both old world and modern at the same time. An
affluent stamp marked the property; everywhere they looked the evidence of big money stared back. Rolling hills lined with rows upon rows of gnarled grape vines lashed to rigging to keep them upright went as far as the eye could see. Snow dotted the mountaintops above them. It was romantic and breathtakingly scenic. Too bad they weren’t out sightseeing.

  An older man with a sharp smile emerged from the house and quickly introduced himself. “You must be Agent Archangelo and Agent Fallon. Nice to meet you. My name is Trevor Granger. I own Butterfly Bend.”

  “Thank you for agreeing to see us on such short notice,” Jane said.

  “No problem. We’re off season right now, so things slow to an acceptable pace around here. Now, if this meeting had happened in September, I would’ve had to tell you to take a number.” He laughed at his own joke and Jane and Holden simply smiled politely as they followed him into the warmth of the building. Inside was just as lovely as the outside. Tastefully decorated with an understated wealth, it looked as if a set decorator had dressed it for a scene. “Can I get you some coffee or fresh scones?” he offered. A scone tempted Jane, but she declined, as did Holden. However, the man wouldn’t take no for an answer. “Are you sure? Fresh from the oven. There is nothing better than a fresh scone with homemade cream. And don’t even try to let anyone tell you the stuff in the can is just as good as cream whipped to a perfect peak. Lies, I tell you. It’s the real deal or nothing.”

  “I agree, sir.” Holden smiled. “Maybe I will take one of those scones.”

  Trevor snapped his fingers and a round dark-haired woman appeared from the kitchen carrying a tray. Her graying hair sprang from her head in unruly strands, and a warm smile wreathed her mouth as she offered the plate for his selection. “Maria is the best baker in all of Washington. I know this because she used to run her own bakery and I made her an offer she couldn’t refuse. Now she bakes for me.”

  Jane looked to Maria, surprised. “You gave up your business to be the baker for Mr. Granger?”

  Maria bobbed her head. “Oh, yes. Mr. Granger is very generous. And I love working here.”