Dove

by D H Sidebottom

  I looked to Wendy, silently pleading with her to up the stakes, but I gritted my teeth when she sighed and shook her head sadly. This meant that Flick was now Sarah’s to do with as she pleased. And I didn’t like the sound of that one bit.

  Just as Sarah grinned smugly, I did something very stupid.

  “Two hundred thousand!”

  All heads turned to me. People were too shocked to even gasp, and I swallowed nervously, hating the attention. I could hear Sarah’s splutter of rage from across the room but all I could do was look to Flick apprehensively.

  “What?” he asked quietly, unsure of whether he had heard me correctly. “Can you repeat that amount?”

  “Two hundred thousand.” I blushed when every single person in the room watched in amazement. I shrugged. “It’s all for a good cause, right?”

  “Bloody hell!” Marcy choked out, but then held up her wine glass to me. “Well, congratulations, Dove. You just bought yourself a slave for the day.”

  Everyone, hearing Marcy’s declaration, lifted their own glasses and toasted to me, then the room broke into a deafening applause, everyone obviously grateful for the drama as well as the amount of money going to K.I.N. I saw Sarah barge out of the room and I couldn’t help the smug smile that curved my lips.

  “We’re going!” Flick barked when he appeared beside me and grabbed my hand. He pulled me out of my chair, his stern expression making people shift out of his way quickly when they realised he was furious. I couldn’t understand what I’d done wrong but I snatched up my bag, waved goodbye to my table companions, and scuttled behind a fuming Flick.

  Once again, he bundled me into the car that was waiting outside for us, but this time he climbed into the back with me. Banging a button with his fist, the screen that separated us from the driver slid up slowly, my heart beat mirroring its rise when the space around me seemed to shrink.

  Flick turned to me with blazing eyes. “Why would you do that?” His voice was low but his eyes sparked with fury.

  I stiffened. It hurt that he was angry I had won the auction. Evidently he hadn’t any other plans to see me again and now he was faced with another twenty-four hours of me, he wasn’t too happy. Taking umbrage, I glared back at him. “Why wouldn’t I?”

  “This isn’t a game, Dove. That money is needed by these kids, and now you’ve lost them ninety thousand pounds.”

  I stared back at him in amazement. “You think I can’t pay!” I wasn’t sure if I was offended or saddened with his lack of appreciation and trust. “You think I would just bark out a price I’m not willing to pay?”

  His mouth fell open before he schooled his emotions and blinked at me. “You mean you can afford it?”

  I scoffed, shaking my head in frustration. “I wouldn’t have bid if I couldn’t afford it, Flick.”

  “But it’s… it’s two hundred thousand!”

  “I know I didn’t gain my GCSE in maths…” I pursed my lips. “Mainly because I didn’t attend school, but I can add up. I’m not just a blonde airhead!”

  He stared at me, his face showing his confusion with narrow eyes. “But you’re just a…”

  “A whore?” I hated that word, and you’d think after hearing it so many times I would be used to it.

  He swallowed and shook his head. “I was going to say escort.” He narrowed his eyes defensively.

  Shaking my head, I turned towards the window. “I work hard for my money, Flick.”

  “Of course you do,” he mocked. “It’s hard work laid on your back.”

  My body tensed as nausea sliced up my throat. But as usual, my mouth wouldn’t shut the hell up. “Oh, I don’t know, Flick. Sometimes I’m on my knees, others I’m straddled across someone’s lap. And sometimes I’m even suspended from the fucking ceiling!”

  He glared at me as I glared back but when a bang on the partition made us both jump, the glass lowered and I relaxed as oxygen filled my lungs once again.

  “There’s a welcoming party, Mr O’Kane,” his driver told us. “I’m going around the back of the building and the staff are opening the lower garage for us.”

  “Thank you, Frank.”

  I couldn’t help but smile. Flick, stunned by my sudden mood swing, looked at me questioningly. “My driver is also called Frank,” I revealed, finding it humorous. I had no idea why.

  Flick nodded sharply and turned to look back out of the window at the mass of paparazzi that had stormed the front section of his apartment block. I would hate this shit. I tried to keep my private life as confidential as possible, essentially for Ren, but really it was a necessity with my job.

  Once we pulled into a spot in the lower car parking area, the door opened and Frank opened my door for me. “Thank you.” I gave him a grateful smile and rolled my eyes at him when Flick stormed across the concrete area towards the elevator.

  “Have a good evening, Miss Bliss.” Frank chuckled with a sly wink.

  “Oh, it’s guaranteed,” I joked before following Flick into the lift.

  I pulled in a breath, ready to hold onto it as we started to move up to the top floor. Why did they have to build these skyscrapers so damn high that taking the stairs wasn’t even an option?

  My fists clenched by my side but I braved it out, releasing the breath in one go when the doors opened onto Flick’s penthouse foyer.

  Taking a fortifying gulp of air, I followed his rigid body into his apartment. Immediately, he took out a small amount of coke and started forming a line. Kneeling before the low glass table, his eyes eventually lifted to mine. “You want one?”

  Shaking my head, I stood in silence and watched him roll a twenty and inhale quickly. I had a suspicion that Flick was doing too much, however it wasn’t any of my business so I remained tight-lipped.

  “Do you want me to go?” I asked quietly when he closed his eyes and flopped against the sofa behind him.

  “Do you want to go?” he asked, without opening his eyes.

  “Well it’s pretty obvious you don’t want me here, but you paid for the full night so it’s entirely your decision.”

  I stood like a lemon in the middle of his extravagant apartment, the space filled with luxurious furniture but no personal effects.

  Slowly he opened his eyes and turned his gaze to me. Pushing himself upright he pierced me with a probing stare. “You’re right, I did pay for the night.” His voice was low as he walked across the space between us. “And tell me, Dove. What exactly do I get for my twenty thousand?”

  Every inch of my body became sensitive when he stood before me. My skin felt like a thousand knives were slicing over me. My pulse danced in my ears and my mouth dried as the liquid in my body appeared to evaporate. Gulping, I forced my mind into the zone it was all too familiar with. “You get anything, and everything you want, Mr O’Kane.”

  He pursed his lips and nodded slowly. Then he walked past me. “Follow me.”

  Wanting this so much yet loathing that it was only because he paid me for it, I followed him into the bedroom. For over ten years I had wanted to feel Flick’s touch on my body, and in my heart. Yet now the time had come I wanted it to be so different. I wanted to feel his touch and see his smile, yet the customary numbness that rolled over me denied me everything.

  I stood before him when he stopped and turned to me. “Take off your dress.”

  Mechanically, I reached behind me and lowered the zip, then seductively, routine kicking in, I slowly slid the material off my shoulders, the silk and lace dropping to pool around my feet and leaving me stood in red lace underwear.

  Flick’s green eyes scorched with heat as they slid over me, his lips tinting red with lust before he brought his gaze back to my face. I stood, insensitive to each of his gazes, my mind and body used to the horror that was to come.

  I stared at the bed when Flick moved past me, and when I heard a drawer open, my stomach sank. I was accustomed to each and every toy on the market, each sinister mechanical device that could hold me down so the client c
ould enact their sick desires on me. Yet I had thought Flick would be different; a giving lover. I knew I should never trust my instincts like Marcus had always told me.

  But when he came back to me and held something in his hands, the item shocking me back to myself, I couldn’t help but stare at him.

  “Put it on,” he demanded.

  Hesitantly taking the t-shirt from him, I slid it over my head, disorientation rendering my body static.

  Stripping himself then pulling back the duvet, he patted the mattress. “In.”

  My legs moved involuntarily, walking me in a daze to the bed where I tentatively climbed in. Flick settled beside me, pulling the duvet around us before he flicked off the light.

  “Get some sleep, Dove.”

  I stared into the darkness, stupidly upset that he didn’t want me. What the hell was wrong with me? This was my life, fucking men, but when one didn’t want me, it hurt. Yet I knew it wasn’t because it was just anyone. It was Flick.

  When Flick’s soft snores beat heavily through my head, I slipped out of bed and, taking one last look at the man I had loved for years, I dressed and slipped quietly into the night.

  “HARDER!” MARCUS YELLED, piercing my already bruised ego with another bout of hopelessness. “Harder, Dove!”

  Rage surged and I punched the bag with force, a scream tearing from my throat and giving me the strength to push Marcus backwards.

  “Better,” he said when I bent and supported my hands on my knees as I tried to force necessary air into my lungs. “What the hell is with you today?”

  I lifted my head and saw Ren standing in the doorway. She watched me with accusing eyes, and when I frowned, she walked across the mat to me. “I’d say this is what’s wrong.” She unrolled the newspaper in her hand and showed Marcus and me the front page.

  A groan rumbled from me and I plonked my arse onto the mat, taking the paper from her and grimacing at the picture of me punching Cody.

  “Really?” Marcus sighed in disappointment. “I don’t train you for that crap, Dove. You know to control it.”

  Quickly scanning the story about ‘the whore that laid the actor out with her fist instead of her body’ I wiped at the sweat that trickled over my eyes.

  “It also says you paid two hundred grand to claim Flick O’Kane as your slave for the day!”

  I flinched at the tone in Ren’s voice, but when Marcus sat down beside me, I knew I was in for worse. “What the hell are you playing at Dove?” he growled. “You know you can’t afford this much publicity. It’s dangerous.”

  “I didn’t know it was Flick! It was a different name on the booking form. I didn’t know!”

  “So why the fuck didn’t you walk away when you found out?”

  His question was one I’d been asking myself since I had climbed out of Flick’s bed and into my own two nights ago.

  When I couldn’t answer him, Ren sighed and crouched in front of me. “That life is gone, Dove. You can’t allow yourself to go back there. I know how you felt… feel about Flick and it’s not something you can permit yourself to feel anymore.”

  Disappointment and anger twisted my gut and I clenched my fists at the self-hatred. “Don’t you dare put that on me, Ren.” I was so angry with her, with Marcus, with him. “Everything I have ever done has been for you! Don’t you think I’m entitled to feel just once in my fucking life?”

  Hurt slashed across her face and I immediately regretted my outburst. I snatched at her hand but she rushed from the room. Marcus gave me a reproachful look and I groaned, flopping onto my back with exhaustion.

  “Please tell me you didn’t give him your address. At least tell me that!”

  “Of course I didn’t. I’m not completely stupid.”

  Marcus scoffed and shook his head. “Well, you better pray that the press don’t try and find out to further their story because if it gets out, you and Ren are dead. You know that, don’t you?”

  “Yes,” I spat through a tight jaw. “I do know that!”

  Holding up his hands, he walked away, leaving me simmering in the hell of my own mind.

  Ren was sitting on the sofa, her legs curled under her when I walked in after my late run. Her eyes twinkled with tears and my heart plummeted. Pursing her lips, she looked at me sadly. “I’m sorry, Dove.”

  “Hey.” I sat beside her and grabbed her hand. “It’s me who’s sorry. I should have been more careful. Now I’ve put you at risk.”

  She tutted at me, lifting the blanket so I could snuggle down with her. “I’m not concerned about that. I’m worried about you. I know how much you’ve lost, Dove, and I’m…”

  I shushed her. “I haven’t lost anything. I’ve got you. And you’re everything that’s important to me.”

  “But your life isn’t what you wished for.”

  “Is anyone’s?”

  She shrugged. “I suppose not.”

  Grabbing her hand again, I made her look at me. “That’s why it’s important to me that you do well at university. You have the chance of doing something with your life that you want. You have to do it, Ren. Don’t make the same choices I did.”

  “I’d hardly call it a choice, not when you didn’t have any option.”

  “Well, what’s been has been. We just have to try and keep things smooth for the moment. It’s been two years, and so far we’re okay. I shouldn’t have risked that. And now we have nowhere to run.”

  “We always have somewhere, Dove.”

  I shook my head. “Not anymore. You’re at uni and I won’t allow him to take that from you. All you’ve ever wanted is to study. This time I have to fight, and believe me I will. I will do whatever it takes to keep you safe.”

  Giving me a small smile, she wrapped her arm around me and pulled me close. “If we need to run then we do. You won’t risk my degree but I won’t risk you. We’re in this together, Dove. We always have been and we do what is necessary.”

  My phone rang, breaking me from my amazing sister. She grumbled when I sat up and picked it up from the table. “Sorry,” I mouthed when I saw Jemima’s name flash up.

  “It’s okay.” Ren smiled as she rose from the sofa and kissed me on top of my head. “I have studying to do anyway.”

  “Dove?” Jemima, my PA, asked, even though she knew it was me because she’d dialled my number.

  “Yep,” I answered as I watched Ren take the stairs up to the top floor where her room was.

  “Frank can’t pick you up tonight, he’s called in ill. I’ve managed to get you another driver but he won’t be with you until 7.30.”

  “Have you informed Larry that I’ll be late?”

  “I have. He’s fine. By the way, I wrote and mailed the cheque you asked me to do. And you have a new booking for tomorrow. Marcy and David Peters.”

  “Okay.” I nodded even though she couldn’t see me. “Please tell me Wednesday is free. I really need to spend time with Ren.”

  I reached down and picked up a whimpering Arthur, Ren’s pug, when he tried to use my leggings as a ladder to hoist himself onto my knee. His heavy breathing reached Jemima down the phone and she squealed in my ear. “Arthur! Hello, baby.” I rolled my eyes when Arthur returned her smooching into the phone, his slobber coating the mouthpiece and making my stomach churn.

  “Anything else?” I asked Jemima before I had to break the lovers up.

  “Nope, don’t think so. Oh, do you have condoms? Frank has a new batch for you but of course that’s no good for tonight.”

  “It’s fine, Jem. It’s Larry.”

  “Oh, of course,” she mumbled. “The other line is ringing. Have a safe night.”

  “Bye,” I said, but she’d already gone.

  Arthur curled up on my lap when my fingers found the dip behind his little ear. “You fancy going for me, Arthur? I don’t even think Larry will realise.”

  Larry was one of my regulars. He was in his early fifties and he liked to watch me masturbate. He never touched me, and strangely, he never touche
d himself. But he still paid the full twelve thousand for the six hour privilege of my company. I wished all my clients were like him.

  Arthur looked at me and whined when the doorbell rang. “Sorry, baby.” I lifted him off my knee and went to answer the door.

  A heavyset guy stood staring at me. I frowned at him, and in the split second it took for my instincts to kick in, he was already on me, his fist connecting with my jaw as he landed a punch to my cheekbone. I flew backwards, my backside hitting the stone slabs on the floor and my side thudding against the wall as my breath left me in a single burst.

  “Fuck!”

  Jumping up, I prepared to fight, my brain finally kicking in as I swung out and got a kick to his gut. He grunted and stumbled but came at me again, pouncing on me, and we both fell to the floor.

  His fingers curled around my throat as he straddled my body, his weight too much for me to lift as I bucked beneath him and prayed my flipping would loosen his hold on me. All of Marcus’ training flashed in my mind and I tried to find a way out. My arms were locked by my sides, my legs were captured beneath his weight, and the only available part of my body was my head. So, taking a deep breath when he leaned in to whisper a cruel taunt in my ear, I flung my face forwards and head-butted him. Tears sprung in my eyes at the pain but he toppled over, allowing me to get up and make a run for the room.

  He jumped at me just as I reached the sofa and my face hit the floor with an almighty whack, my head screaming at the pain that exploded through my nose.

  I scrambled around, stretching out with my fingers under the sofa. Just an inch. Just half an inch. When his fists rained down on the back of my head and lights popped behind my eyes, I gritted my teeth when steel brushed my fingers and I grabbed hold. Pulling my arm out, I prayed and aimed the gun over my shoulder as I pressed the trigger.

  The pop, for a moment, rendered me deaf, but when the weight disappeared off my back, I released a choked cry and flopped against the carpet.