The Amour series (Book 1): The Embers of Amour

by LaRue, Coushatta

  She touched it and went back to shaving, rubbing her lips together. Evan dipped his razor into the water and continued, “She judged a lot of things I said harshly. And during our first Christmas, she had no interest in celebrating it with me. But she was going to walk out of her job to go see her ex-boyfriend for his birthday.”

  She could see Evan’s face twist in pain. He dipped the razor in the water again and dragged it along his chin as he said, “Sometimes when I was upset, I’d want to be close to her. She would knock my hands away. She could be so cold like she would tell me I wasn’t trying hard enough to get more business for my gym. That hurt the most; because I’d spend hours a day online, looking for more ways to make my business better.”

  He paused and looked at the razor for a second as he thought. His eyes were full of sorrow, but there was a hint of anger in them. His eyes made their way to Abby as she put her leg back into the water and put the other onto the side of the tub. He smacked his lips and started to shave again. But, not until after he looked at his wedding ring with longing.

  “No relationship is perfect. Everyone will have their problems… and if you don’t learn to compromise or learn that you’re not always right and if you do not learn to see things from your partner’s side, it will never work out. That is the biggest problems in relationships, and why they fail.” He explained slowly. He looked up at Abby carefully and then down at the bubbles in the water. Hair was all over them. He knocked the bubbles away.

  “I miss him sometimes.” She said shamefully, “I know I shouldn’t. He doesn’t deserve it.”

  “But you do, and that is normal. Even though my mom was a monster to the end, I still wondered how she was sometimes. It is natural. It doesn’t mean you don’t still love them. It does not mean you deserved to be treated that way.” He said bitterly. He put his razor down, and Abby stared at his clean face. He was more handsome than he had been before.

  She finished her leg and put it into the water and touched her chest where her necklace was. Her heart felt heavy, and it was hard to think of Aaron. A part of her was still trying to convince her he was a saint and the best person ever. Yet she knew he had been very bad to her, and he was never going to make her happy.

  “I would’ve been so miserable with him. I know that…” her eyes trailed off towards the brick railing, and she closed her eyes. She swallowed hard. She heard Evan move in the tub and felt his hand touch her face. He rubbed his fingers on her cheek. When she opened her teary eyes, he was giving her an emphatic gaze.

  “We all make mistakes. We all trust someone who screws us over. And sometimes they don’t mean to. It just happens, and they can’t take it back. Don’t hold a grudge against him. You don’t have to forgive him for the horrible things he has done to you.” He held her head in his hand as a tear rolled down her cheek then softly whispered, “Forgive him for being weak and a coward. Then curse him and move on.” He snickered.

  She smiled, and he moved from her and leaned back in the tub, sighing. She did the same and closed her eyes. In that moment, she did not feel scared or worried about what could happen to them. She did not feel pain or her tiredness. She felt bliss and hopefulness. It was strange. She had no idea if they would make it out of the city or even get to Haven. She had no idea if Haven was even real; but in that moment as she sunk lower into the tub, she felt peace and clarity rise above her loss.

  After they both became wrinkled and the bubbles disappeared and the dirty water became cold, they got out of the tub. The water dripped from Abby’s wet body, and she shivered. She wrapped her arms around her body as Evan grabbed a towel for her. She wrapped it around her and watched Evan do the same with his towel. He stared down into the tub and shook his head pressing his lips upwards.

  “I’m pretty sure no one can use this tub anymore,” He looked at her, eyeing her up and down.

  She glared at him and hissed, “You had more hair on your face than on one of my legs.”

  He grinned.

  After drying off, they began to put on their new clothes. Abby did not bother wearing a bra because she had lost so much weight her breasts were almost gone. It saddened her, but she knew worst things could happen. She slid on her underwear and then the workout pants. She would put a bandage on her leg later. She pulled nice wool socks over her feet and then started to put her shoes on.

  She sat on the side of the tub. Her head was spinning again, and her body felt very heavy. She needed to sleep. She glanced up at Evan and noticed how he gracefully put his clothes on. It made her feel good. She felt as if they could have been great best friends outside this hell of a life. When they were done, they walked towards the table of bath supplies and grabbed new toothbrushes and toothpaste and brushed their teeth.

  Afterwards, Abby grabbed some lotion and started to put some on. Evan grabbed a bottle of lotion for himself and used it on his arms and face. He looked very polished and good. Abby brushed her hair and put some moisturizer on her face. Then grabbed perfume and sprayed it on. None of it really mattered or was necessary, but something about it made her feel normal again.

  When they were finished, they looked like completely different people. They looked normal as if the world around them was fine. It felt nice for a moment.

  “Thank you,” Evan gently said.

  “I didn’t do anything,” She lowered her eyes.

  He nodded and rubbed his hands together as he said, “You stayed.”

  He walked towards the table with the towels as Abby stood there with her hand on her chest. She felt sad and guilty that she wanted to die before. She shook the feeling and the tears away. She was happy she had stayed as well. Evan walked back with a laundry bag and opened it and nudged it at the table of bath supplies.

  “What do you want?” He asked.

  She grabbed a few toothbrushes, toothpaste, few bottles of shampoo, and soap, and lastly a large bottle of lotion. She wanted more, however she knew being greedy would not be the best idea. She felt annoyed that she had to leave it all behind as they walked towards the stairs but understood that the things she was leaving behind were being left behind for a good reason. They served no purpose in her future.

  They walked back outside into the large open area, and Abby could smell the rot again over the food smell. She groaned. Evan walked towards some of the random piles and started to dig. He grabbed two large duffle bags and tossed them on the floor next to the table. He seemed jittery and nervous. The excitement and happiness from the bath was already gone.

  “Okay let’s pack what we need. Food and medical supplies. There is a truck outside and down in the lobby are cases of water. I’ll grab them and the truck.” He was agitated. She saw his body was tensed, and his hands were shaking. She realized quickly that he had been awake when they had been taken by these people. This place was torturing him.

  “I’ll get the medical supplies,” She told him. He nodded and hurried towards the food. She grabbed a duffle bag and looked through the medical supplies. She wanted it all but only took what she knew would be useful. She grabbed a few random things as she filled the bag. She saw Evan hurrying as he tossed things into his. She walked to the clothing and grabbed a large jacket, a smaller jacket, and then saw blankets still in their new packaging nearby. She took one from its packaging and put it in the duffle bag.

  When she walked back, Evan was closing his bag tightly. It was full and looked heavy. He also had two gas cans next to him. She eyed them. When he looked up, he stumbled over his words as he pointed at the gas cans. He stopped trying to talk and glared at the two bodies still by the railing. Abby looked at the bodies and understood. She handed her duffle bag to Evan and put a hand on his shoulder.

  “It’s okay,” She uttered. He did not say a word. She slowly picked up the gas cans. He gave the church a long hard stare then hurried towards the door in the corner. He stopped by the table and grabbed the gun. She watched him as he went. She circled the room with her eyes feeling very small. She rubbed her hands
together. Her pinky felt very strange in her cupped hands.

  Abby opened the gas cans and gave the two bodies one last long look. She felt hate and anger grow inside her. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She stood up and poured gas everywhere. On the food, the clothes, and medical supplies. Some over the railing and on the bodies. She then tossed the empty gas cans over the railing.

  She walked towards the door in the corner of the room but stopped at the table to grab a box of matches. She lit one and glared at the church. She stared up at Jesus.

  “Forgive him if you’re real. You have to understand why we have to do this,” She told the statue. She breathed in deeply and tossed the match. The area burst into flames in a matter of seconds. She watched it burning for a few seconds before hurrying out of the room. The bars on the staircase were open, and she almost tumbled down them as she tried to run.

  At the bottom was a long narrow hallway. There was a doorway at the end that had some light shining through it. Abby hurried towards it, and Evan stepped into the doorway and grabbed her arm as she came out. She stumbled, but he held her up. His eyes met hers, and he knew it had been done.

  They both looked at the church from the outside, and a chill ran up Abby’s spine. She hoped that they would never have to go through anything like that again. Flames licked through the windows of the church as the fire spread quickly. There was a red truck next to them, and Abby hurried to get in.

  She looked back towards the church and said harshly, “Let’s go, Evan. There is nothing left for us here.”

  He did not say a word. He hurried into the truck as she closed her door. The duffle bags were in the backseat with four cases of water. Abby got into the truck and shut the door and stared at the flames pouring through the stained glass windows. It looked as if it was cleansing the Church. Abby shifted her eyes slowly towards Evan. He looked so upset. When he looked down at her, his eyes relaxed. He nodded his head as he pulled away from the Church.

  Chapter nineteen

  Abby had allowed herself to fall asleep; and when she awoke, the sun was high in the sky. She rubbed sleep from her eyes and yawned. She looked over at Evan. He was staring at the road with a hard look. He looked pale, and the muscles in his cheeks were tensing. She sat up and gave him a long thoughtful look. He noticed her stare and rubbed his face.

  “I’m okay,” He groaned, rubbing the good side of his face. She could tell by the tormented look in his hazel eyes that he was not okay. She was sure he had never really grieved about Megan’s death. He looked drained. She wanted to say something but was not sure of what to say. She felt bad about Megan and almost blamed herself, but she knew it was not her the undead were following. The undead did not notice her anymore. She twirled her fingers around and breathed slowly.

  She reached into the backseat and grabbed a bottle of water from a case then drank a little. She put it by her and then opened the medical bag. She started to pull out medical supplies. She grabbed some peroxide, gauze, ointment, cotton balls, and painkillers. Her head and body were aching, but it was not as bad as before.

  She pulled her pants down and stared at her wounds. Evan glanced over for a second and then back at the road. She touched the ugly scabs and scar gently. They felt sticky and hot but smooth and clean. The bruising around it was going down too. A little puss came out of a few open cuts on the wounds as she cleaned it with the cotton balls and peroxide. She wrinkled her nose when a strange smell entered her nose. The wound looked good, even though she had been bitten just a week ago.

  “It looks good,” She heard Evan say with a hoarse voice. She gazed up at him, her eyes shining.

  “It is a little sore,” She admitted, “But, I think I will be fine.”

  Evan smiled at her, and Abby returned his smile with a joyful glance. She finished cleaning the wound quickly and put some ointment on it before wrapping it in gauze. She pulled her pants back up and let out a long sigh. She felt very restless now. She still felt very full from the food they had eaten hours ago. She rubbed her bloated belly and leaned backwards and looked at the blue sky ahead.

  “How long until Haven?” She asked Evan.

  “Three days with good weather,” He said sharply. She turned her head towards him. He sounded on edge. She put her hands into her lap and stared at him for a second before glancing out the window again. She could not think of anything to help him. She felt guilty then breathed. She had no control over his feelings, and that was okay. She knew she had to stay positive to get through all of this.

  She thought about the man she had killed by ripping his throat out, and she touched her mouth with her fingertips. The scars on her lip were still there. She lowered her eyes and felt slightly sick. She could not believe she had done that. She had killed someone. Not just one person but four, and even though she knew she had to she felt upset about it. She was not that kind of person. A sudden memory of Tomas popped into her mind, and she shut her eyes. She did not want to see him again.

  “I have to pee,” Evan growled. She felt the car slowing down and saw they were heading towards a small abandoned gas station. There were trees and tall hills behind it, and the sun was starting to lower in the sky. She wondered what time it was. She looked at the truck’s clock and saw it said 8:23pm. She wondered if it was right. She felt a chill run up her spine, so she wrapped her arms around her chest. She shivered

  “It’s going to get colder the farther we drive north,” Evan mentioned then added, “Probably snow too.”

  “I’ve never seen snow,” Abby told him, smiling. He glanced at her, frowning.

  Evan pulled the truck behind the gas station and stared around. He glanced at Abby then the gas station then back at her and lowered his eyes. She knew what he wanted, and it made her feel uneasy. Nevertheless, she closed her eyes and listened. She heard her heartbeat loud in her chest and Evan’s in her ears. And she heard nothing else.

  She gave him an unsure look and told him, “I think we’re alone.”

  He grunted and got out the truck quickly. She cupped her hands and rubbed her pinky’s scar.

  She looked out her window. She stared at the hills and trees and then at something strange behind a large trash can. It looked like a pile of bottles. She glared at them for a long time before a smirk slowly grew on her face. She opened the truck door, looked around, felt a cold breeze wash over her, and then stepped out. Her feet felt sore, and her left leg felt as if it had needles in it. She shut the door and crossed her arms. She stared around the area and at the blue sky then walked towards the trash can. She stood next to it and stared at the dozens of empty glass bottles on the ground.

  She struggled to bend down and grab one. She rolled it around in her hands then chunked it as far as she could. It smashed into a tree and shattered loudly. She picked another one up and tossed it. It missed the tree but smashed into the ground. When she picked up another one, she heard footsteps behind her.

  “What are you doing?” Evan asked with a hint of misery in his voice. She smiled back at him and waved him over. He looked very paranoid as he walked towards her with the gun in his hand. He stopped by her and looked at the trees and hills in front of them. She tossed the bottle in her hand, and it shattered on another tree.

  “We don’t have time for this, Abby.”

  He went to turn away when she softly touched his arm and turned him back. She was giving him an affectionate stare.

  “We have all the time in the world for this,” She said quietly. She handed him the bottle but he pulled away. She reached for his hand and grabbed it then said firmly, “Trust me.”

  The bottle slipped into his hands slowly. He put the gun in his pants behind his back and stared at the bottle coldly. He was not sure of what to do or why they were even doing it. Abby knew it looked crazy, but it was a safe way to let out emotions, and it felt good. He gave her a queer look before he finally tossed it with all his might. It shattered into millions of tiny pieces on a large oak tree. She saw the muscles in hi
s face loosen up, and his body relax. A sly grin was slowly appearing on his chiseled face.

  He gazed at her as she reached down and picked up two more bottles. She gave him one, and he tossed it into the air and caught it again. He smirked. She twisted the bottle in her hand as Evan chunked his. It smashed onto another tree, and he laughed. He grabbed another and threw it then another, and he laughed louder each time.

  Finally Abby threw hers; and when she did, she shouted, “This is for promising gifts for my birthday then not doing shit on it.”

  The bottle slammed into a small tree and broke apart. Abby was panting, and her arm hurt from how hard she had tossed it. She felt anger and excitement and release. Evan gave her another bottle.

  “This is for writing me a sweet letter and then turning around and saying you didn’t mean half of it. Fucking jerk,” She threw the bottle as hard as she could and almost fell. Evan caught her, and they both laughed as it shattered behind a tree. She rubbed her forehead. The cold wind felt good on her hot cheeks.

  Evan had another bottle in his hands, and he stared at it with wild eyes as he threw it and screamed, “This is for ignoring me for your bitch of an ex on Christmas day.” The bottle shattered, and Evan breathed in deeply. He grabbed another bottle and squeezed it in his hands. His eyes were sharp, and the look on his face was of anger.

  “This is for all the times you sat on your ass blogging instead of walking with me like you promised you would.” He screamed.

  “This is for not inviting me to your work’s park lunch, because that whore you had a crush on was there,” Abby threw her bottle and was taken over with rage as she screamed as loud as she could, “Fuck you, Aaron!”

  Evan patted her on the back and laughed. Abby rubbed happy tears from her eyes as she grabbed another bottle.

  Evan grabbed the bottle from her and tossed it farther than anyone of them had