Fire of the Soul

by Speer, Flora

  “Yes, I know.” Mallory stood unmoving while his wife touched and fondled him. He shut his ears to her delighted shriek when he tumbled her on onto the bed and took her with ruthless efficiency.

  “Oh, Mallory! Oh, Mallory!”

  He really was growing tired of listening to the way she cried out his name over and over. Very soon now he’d have to do something about Fenella. He’d think seriously about that as soon as the encroaching blackness left his mind. But first, for a few brief moments, he could afford to give in to the clamouring demands of his body.

  Chapter 20

  Over the next two days, in spite of the strict confinement to which Lady Elgida’s party was sentenced by the king’s anger, Calia began to appreciate the joy and the love with which Ilona lived her life. Never once did Calia feel unwelcome in that house. Never did she sense any irritation on Ilona’s part at having so many unexpected guests.

  Euric was openly fond of Ilona. He often touched his wife’s arm or her hand, and kissed her on the cheek with no sign of embarassment if other people were present. From the way he and Ilona gazed at each other, Calia guessed that their more private moments were tender and extremely warm.

  Then, there was Ilona’s easy, affectionate relationship with her brother. She and Durand teased each other, laughed together over childhood memories, and seemed almost to read each other’s thoughts.

  “What’s wrong?” Garit demanded on the second afternoon of their temporary banishment from court. He had followed Calia into the garden and stood watching while she wiped the treacherous moisture from her eyes. “Why are you weeping? Why did you hurry out of the room before Ilona and Durand could finish telling their funny story?”

  “I am not weeping.” Calia moved away, feeling that a bit of distance from him was her safest option at the moment. She was still annoyed with him for assuming he could simply order her to turn over the Emerald if Laisren gave it into her keeping and that she would obey him without a qualm.

  She should have known Garit would not permit evasion. He caught her arm and spun her around to face him. Then he removed his hands as if the touch of her burned him.

  “Answer me. What new scheme are you hatching?”

  “No scheme.” The anger she had felt during their dispute in Durand’s room flared anew. “I wish you would not be so suspicious of me.”

  “I wouldn’t be suspicious if you hadn’t lied to me.”

  “I am not going to explain again how I did so against my will, and on your grandmother’s explicit orders. Nor will I defend my decision to obey Ultan’s wishes.

  “Do you really want to know why I was crying just now? Very well, I’ll tell you. It’s because I am a frequent witness to how happy Ilona is with Euric, and because I see daily the affection that she and Durand share, affection they’ve clearly held for each other since they were very young. Ilona has told me how Durand earned her dowry by his work for King Henryk, so she could marry a good and decent man who would love and respect her.

  “I am happy for Ilona, and I like her very much, but I do envy her. I have never known a father’s tenderness, nor a brother’s affection, and no man will ever love me the way Euric loves her.” She had said too much. She knew it from the closed look that came over Garit’s face.

  “I don’t often give way to self-pity,” she told him. “I know very well that no one in this house is to blame for my lonely childhood, but the happiness here is in such striking contrast to life at Catherstone.”

  Garit stared at her, wishing with all his heart that she was someone else’s daughter. Before he’d known the truth about her, Calia’s concern for his grandmother and her competence as chatelaine of Saumar, where she was liked and respected, had slowly melted some of the coldness around his heart, until he had begun to think about a future with her. Knowing he’d never love her – or any woman – the way he had loved Chantal, still he was willing to marry her. Then he’d learned that Walderon was her father and the chill at his heart had returned, more severe than ever.

  Now he was close to despair as he realized how hungry he still was for her approval and how eager he was to hold her in his arms again. He felt great sympathy for her loneliness, yet he knew he could never take her to wife. In order to honor Chantal’s memory he must deny himself whatever comfort he might have found with Calia.

  “Garit, I beg you to listen to me.” Calia’s hand rested on his chest, preventing him from leaving the garden when he would have turned and stalked away from her. “I understand why you hate me and always will. But please, don’t let your anger at me interfere with keeping Lady Elgida safe. Despite Mallory’s presence in Kerun, we must find a way for her to meet Belai and Kinen. Then we must rescue the boys from Mallory. I have been thinking.”

  “Thinking what?” Garit was wary of her, but he stayed where he was. The touch of her hand on his chest was oddly reassuring in a time and place where even the heavenly blue sky above seemed to be conspiring against him and all he had ever dreamed of having.

  “If Laisren does ask me to return the Emerald to Ultan, I will refuse to do so unless she releases those boys to you or to Lady Elgida, and grants permission for them to leave Kantia.”

  “Threats won’t affect her. She can use her Power to force you to do her bidding. By the way, have you forgotten that Duran and I are under orders to take the Emerald to King Henryk, not to Ultan?” He had hesitated to remind her of their quarrel, but felt a reminder was necessary.

  “Of course, I haven’t forgotten,” she responded, “nor have I changed my mind. I will not give the Emerald to you. But that stone is the only tool we have to bargain with.”

  “We don’t have the Emerald,” he reminded her.

  “We don’t have the boys, either, and unless Laisren helps us, we aren’t likely to see them now that Mallory is in the city.”

  “Durand and I will find a way.”

  “Yes, like men everywhere, you will unsheathe your swords and fight. In so doing, you will likely cause the deaths of your grandmother and your brothers. I cannot believe that you were ever a diplomat.” She turned from him and headed toward the guest cottage.

  “That was unjust!” Garit called after her. “I will not fight unless I cannot avoid it. And I will keep my grandmother safe from your brother.”

  Calia didn’t answer him. Garit marvelled at her brief outburst of temper so soon after her damp-eyed confession of sadness. Then he wondered why the ache in his chest was soothed by her irate words that implied she was as unhappy as he about their dispute over the Emerald.

  “You haven’t provided me with any information I didn’t already have.” With a scowl at her, Mallory swung away from his wife. “I want – no, I need to know where the Emerald is.”

  “Oh, Mallory, I am sorry to disappoint you.” Fenella reached for him. “I’ll try to do better tomorrow. The queen was so distracted today. I do wonder if all is well between her and the king.”

  “What did you say?” Mallory had been about to leave the bedchamber. He paused instead while he considered the possibilities inherent in Laisren’s distaste for her husband. He hadn’t bothered to exploit the queen’s lack of affection toward her spouse because he’d enjoyed Dyfrig’s complete confidence since well before the king married, and because Kantian queens simply didn’t matter very much, especially a queen who hadn’t produced an heir.

  “I think they’ve quarreled,” Fenella said.

  “Really? Why should they fight at this particular time?”

  “Perhaps they fought about the Emerald. Some of Laisren’s ladies think she ought to present it to Dyfrig, so he’ll become stronger. The Emerald is said to confer great strength on its owner.”

  Mallory could not allow such a gift to pass into Dyfrig’s hands. A strong king was precisely what he did not want. If half the tales he’d heard about the Emerald were true, he’d be hard pressed to overcome its influence by using only his own, corrupt Power.

  “Fenella, I have a task for you at court.”


  “Oh, Mallory, of course. I’m always happy to do whatever you ask of me.”

  She came to him and began to rub herself along his body like some plump, freckled cat. The urge to slap her rose in Mallory, so strong that he was forced to channel his anger elsewhere. Fenella felt his arousal and smiled. Mallory grew even more angry with her, and with himself for tolerating her presence.

  “Oh, Mallory, my love, only tell me what you want,” Fenella murmured. She stroked him through his clothing. “Oh, Mallory, you do care for me.”

  Deep inside Mallory a sudden breach occurred in the strong wall he had long ago erected around his seething emotions. Rage threatened to overcome him. The urge to use his Power to destroy Fenella was almost overwhelming. He fought to keep himself under his usual tight control. Still, he was compelled to lash out at her, to vent a dislike too long repressed.

  “If you say, ‘Oh, Mallory,’ one more time,” he told her between clenched teeth, “I swear I will beat you until you cannot stand up.”

  “Oh, M-” She must have comprehended the depth of his anger, because she stopped what she was going to say, gulped, and said something else, instead. “Only tell me what you want me to do for you at court and I will do it. Will that persuade you to want me again?”

  She would have touched his cheek if he hadn’t swatted her hand away. He’d had enough; he could tolerate her witless affections and her constant desire no longer. He told himself he could locate the Emerald without Fenella’s inept assistance.

  “You stupid creature, why should I want to bed you when there are so many more intelligent and beautiful women here at Kerun?”

  “I’m not stupid! I’m not! Oh, Mallory, you said you loved me.”

  “I never said any such thing. I, love you? Never.” He shook his head in disgust.

  “But I want you. I love you. Oh, Mallory—”

  His hand connected with her cheek.

  “I warned you not to say, ‘Oh, Mallory.’“ His hand rose again, almost without his will behind the movement. The urge to hurt her grew stronger. “I don’t need you, Fenella, and I most certainly do not desire you. I’ll take what I want without help from you or anyone else.”

  Some time later he left her cowering on the bedchamber floor, weeping and bruised and finally understanding that he did not love her and never would.

  Still, the rage inside him remained unappeased. He decided to find a slender, graceful lady of the court to bed, someone beautiful and clever, unlike dull-witted Fenella. He wanted a willing, lascivious lady who’d keep him occupied for most of the night and leave him pleasantly sated in body, if not in mind.

  But on his way to the palace, Hulme approached him, to report that the maidservant he’d befriended had disappeared and no one seemed to know where she had gone. Thus, Hulme had been unable to learn anything more about the exact location of the Emerald, or what Laisren intended to do with it.

  With his immediate plans to take possession of the Emerald thwarted and realizing he was going to have to revise his scheme, Mallory’s fury rose to new heights.

  Using his Power on Hulme was a great relief, though the expenditure of strength left Mallory sorely weakened. He knew he’d be unable to please any woman, much less take the pleasure he had looked forward to until he had recovered his strength. Past experience warned him recovery would require at least a full day.

  Perhaps more than a day, he thought, looking down at the thing that slavered and grovelled at his feet. Still, he couldn’t regret his brief loss of control. He hadn’t used his Power for so long and turning his rage on Hulme had been a cleansing moment that refreshed and renewed him even as it drained his physical and sexual stamina.

  As for Fenella, he decided he’d reconcile with her in a day or two. Unlike Hulme, his despised wife hadn’t entirely lost her usefulness. Fenella did have easy access to the queen. If he let her wait she’d be all the more eager for his reluctant embrace and all the more grateful afterward. She’d do his bidding then and forget what he’d said to her or how he had beaten her. In the meantime, he’d do a bit of spying on his own. By one means or another he would learn where the Emerald was hidden and he’d find a way to get his hands on it.

  On the morning of the third day of banishment from the court Queen Laisren sent for Calia. Sundaria came to the guest cottage by a back garden entrance, wearing a long cloak and with her face covered by a veil.

  “Who are you hiding from, girl?” Lady Elgida demanded. “I will not allow you to lead Calia into danger.”

  “It’s not danger, my lady,” Sundaria answered, lifting the veil. “It’s discretion. Calia, will you come with me? And will you kindly wear the blue gown you wore the evening when you first met the queen?”

  “What a strange request,” Lady Elgida exclaimed.

  The blue gown contained the pocket that had concealed the gift Ultan had sent to his daughter. Calia understood the queen’s request to mean that Laisren was going to pass the Emerald to her and order her to take it to the Great Mage.

  “Of course, I will wear the gown,” she said, her words forestalling any more questions from Lady Elgida. “My lady, this is an opportunity for me to ask the queen again to allow you to see Belai and Kinen.”

  “Take Garit with you,” Lady Elgida said. “Or Durand. You need protection.”

  “Either man will be too noticable,” Sundaria objected. “Women slip into and out of the palace all the time without being stopped. I have never understood the attitude of Kantian men that women are ineffectual creatures, but their foolish reasoning can be convenient.”

  “I recall that male attitude all too well,” Lady Elgida said. “I also remember how angry Kantian men can become when a woman doesn’t behave as they expect. Take care, both of you.”

  “Don’t worry about me.” Calia hurried from the room to change into the blue gown and her heavy cloak.

  Sundaria used a key to open a concealed door in the garden wall. She locked the door again after they were in the narrow street outside, then handed the key to Calia.

  “Don’t lose it,” Sundaria told her. “After you’ve seen the queen and are back inside, return the key to Ilona.”

  “Are you saying that Ilona knows what you are doing?”

  “What we are doing,” Sundaria corrected her. “Ilona, you, me – all of us and the queen. Now, come along. We mustn’t linger in the road.”

  The streets became wider as they approached the palace and more people were present, most hurrying about their own business and uninterested in two women in plain cloaks. At a small door in the back wall of the palace, Sundaria showed the lone guard a heavy gold ring with a design etched into it. The guard looked at the ring, then admitted them with no questions asked.

  Calia was soon lost in the labyrinth of narrow corridors and many staircases. She assumed these were the passageways constructed for servants to use, so those who cleaned the palace, or who carried out the dirty laundry or the refuse could do so unobtrusively. Then, suddenly, she was in the same chamber where she and Durand had previously met with the queen.

  “Wait here.” Sundaria left the room, returning a short time later with Queen Laisren.

  “No doubt you have guessed why I’ve summoned you,” the queen said.

  “My lady, I do thank you for the trust you have placed in me,” Calia responded, “but I cannot leave Kerun City just now.”

  “On the contrary,” Laisren said. “You will leave shortly after dark tonight.”

  “I cannot desert Lady Elgida,” Calia protested.

  Their discussion was interrupted by a mournful wailing outside the chamber. The main door burst open and a woman garbed in a lurid red gown and a blue head scarf stumbled into the room. She limped a few paces, then fell on her face before the queen.

  “My lady, I implore you to help me,” the woman cried.

  “Fenella, is that you?” Calia rushed forward to lift the weeping woman to her feet. She flinched when she beheld Fenella’s face.


  “Dear heavenly blue sky above us,” Queen Laisren whispered, looking shocked. “What has happened to you?”

  “Mallory beat me.” With trembling fingers Fenella touched the bruises on her face. “He hurt my arm and my leg, too.”

  “I disapprove, of course,” Laisren said, her eyes suspiciously bright. “No Chandelari man would ever strike a woman. Still, by Kantian law what occurs between husband and wife must remain private between them.”

  “My brother is a brute and here is proof,” Calia intervened with some spirit. “Fenella, why did Mallory beat you?”

  “He called me stupid and said he didn’t want me.” Fenella paused to gulp back a sob. “I loved him, until he hit me. Now, I never want to see him again.”

  “I am sorry for you,” Laisren said, “but you should not have come here. I cannot contravene the laws of Kantia, however much I may wish I could.”

  “You don’t understand,” Fenella said. She swallowed hard and stood a little taller, though she still leaned on Calia for support. “My lady, Mallory has been insisting that I spy for him.”

  “I can easily believe that,” Calia said to the queen. “When I was younger, Mallory used to force me to spy for him at Catherstone. He never beat me as badly as he has treated Fenella, but he meted out terrible punishments to anyone who dared to defy him, and to a few poor souls who tried to help me.”

  “He beat me because I wasn’t able to learn where you have hidden the Emerald and what you intend to do with it,” Fenella told the queen. “I’m afraid he will harm Belai and Kinen next, if I don’t obey him. You have been kind to me, my lady, and I cannot betray you. Not for a man who cares nothing for me.”

  Distressed though she was to see how Mallory had mistreated his wife, still Calia recognized an opportunity when one presented itself.

  “Queen Laisren,” she said, “you cannot send a badly beaten woman back to a husband who will likely kill her the next time he’s annoyed. I warned you the other day that Mallory is dangerous. What he has done to Fenella, he will do also to her sons.” Seeing how intently the queen was regarding her, she pressed on with her plea. “If you will send Fenella and her boys with me when I return to Lord Euric’s house, Lady Elgida can meet her grandsons at last, and Euric will keep them safe until all of us can leave Kantia.”