Playing with Fire (Ecstasy, Colorado)

by Jenika Snow

  Please, baby, please talk to me. I keep going over and asking to see you but ur mom says ur not ready. Please, baby.

  Janey, not seeing or talking to u is harder than hell. Please, sweetheart, please give Rys a chance to explain.

  I miss u, baby.

  God, Janey, I miss u so damn much.

  We love you, Jane, and we will not let u go.

  The last one was from Rys and sent just a few moments ago. There was so much conviction in his words that she knew he meant every word. Turning the phone back off, she grabbed her coffee and finished it. She had work in an hour and sitting here thinking about how much she just wanted to go over to their house and wrap her arms around them would only make it one very long day.

  ****

  Half of her shift was gone, and Jane was doing a pretty good job not thinking so much about the Holden boys. Oh, who the hell was she kidding? All she had been thinking about was them. Her resolve to stay away had pretty much evaporated. She missed them too damn much to let this come between them. She would have to find a way to get over it, to get through it. Rys and William meant too much to her for her to just throw it all away. They had been there for her during the hardest times of her life, and how was she paying them back? Pushing them away when things got tough made her a selfish bitch. Feeling a sudden burst of joy, she couldn’t wait until her shift was over because she was going right to their house to tell them that she was being a childish, selfish girl, and that she hoped they could move on with their lives, because that was what she wanted to do more than anything…move on with their lives.

  She set a plate of chicken fingers and a burger down at a table in her section and turned to head back to the counter. Movement in her peripheral vision caught her attention, and she turned to saw Trevor and Missy on the other side of the front window. Their discussion was heated by the way Missy kept pointing her finger in his chest. Trevor’s face was a dark shade of red, and he kept looking around, as if he was afraid their little tiff would be heard. Jane couldn’t hear what was being said, but when Trevor started advancing on Missy, bringing back a slew of horrid memories from her date with him, Jane took a step forward, intent on protecting a woman that had done nothing but start shit with her. Missy shoved him away and stormed into Slick’s. She took one look at Jane, scowled, and stalked over to a table in her section. Of course.

  Well, shit, now she had to deal with Missy in a shitty mood. Steeling herself, she walked over to Missy and stood at the table. “What can I get for you?” Jane kept her gaze steady when Missy glowered at her.

  “Just give me a Coke.” Missy speared her hands through her hair and looked away.

  Jane didn’t stick around, just got the drink and went back to waiting on her other tables. Several hours passed with Missy doing nothing but sitting at the booth, sucking down the free refills. The numerous times Jane asked if Missy wanted anything else, Missy responded curtly and told her to fuck off. Jane left her the hell alone. But just because she told Jane to leave her alone, that didn’t stop Missy from glaring at her for the rest of her shift. Awkward didn’t even begin to describe the situation.

  Whatever she and Trevor had fought about, it was sticking with Missy and making her rude and bitchy. When Jane’s shift ended, she was anxious to see the guys. She admitted that she had been acting like a fool, letting all of this get between them. No doubt it would be hard for all of them if it really did turn out that Rys had fathered Christa’s baby, but they wouldn’t know for sure until Christa had the baby and they did a DNA test. Jane knew this was going to be the hardest nine months of her life, but she wanted to get through it with Rys and William.

  It was already dark by the time she grabbed her purse and said good-bye to Lonnie. She glanced at Missy’s table and relaxed when she saw Missy had finally decided to leave. The little bell above the door dinged when she exited. Her piece-of-shit car sat right under the lone parking lot light in full view.

  “Jane.”

  Jane whirled around and stared at Missy. She was against the side of the building, her leg cocked on the brick. A cigarette hung from her lips, and she inhaled deeply. The end lit up a bright orange. Nothing more was said and Jane didn’t know if she should ignore Missy and go to her car or see what she wanted. Obviously Missy had something on her mind, but Jane didn’t know if it was something she wanted to hear. She really wasn’t in the mood to hear her shit, especially if it had to do with Trevor.

  “Come here.”

  Jane held her purse tighter and glanced around. She wasn’t afraid of Missy, but it was no secret that the girl was a dirty fighter. Jane, on the other hand, wasn’t a fighter at all. She was fine being pleasantly ignorant in her bubble of safety. She had been roughed up enough by her father to last a lifetime.

  Missy exhaled almost as if she were annoyed over Jane’s refusal to move. She inhaled deeply once more, flicked the butt away, and pushed off the wall. “Seriously, I’m not gonna beat you up or anything. I just want to talk to you.”

  “Listen, Missy, I’m tired and really not in the mood for Trevor bullshit.”

  Missy stared at her hard, but it wasn’t the hateful glare Jane was accustomed too. When she exhaled this time, it sounded more sad than anything else. “I was going to talk to you in there”—she tilted her head toward Slick’s—“but I know how nosy these damn people are so thought maybe we could talk in your car?”

  Missy didn’t sound like her normal demanding bitchy self, which confused and intrigued Jane. What the hell could Missy really tell her? After a suspended moment, Jane nodded and made her way toward her car. The sound of Missy’s heels clicking on the pavement was loud in the otherwise silent parking lot. They climbed into her car, and Jane rolled the window down to let some of the cool air in. They sat in silence for several minutes, and Jane could tell Missy was struggling with whatever it was she was trying to say. Jane didn’t rush her because she knew whatever bomb was about to be dropped was clearly hard for Missy to say.

  “Listen…” Missy cursed under her breath and turned in her seat, staring right in Jane’s eyes. “I know about all the drama with Rys and Christa. Fuck, the whole damn town knows because Christa thinks everyone should know.”

  Jane knew as much. It was hard hearing the gossip all around her, the whispers about one of the Holden twins finally settling down, like Christa getting knocked up by Rys Holden was the hottest news. It was infuriating, especially since there was no proof that he had even fathered her baby.

  “Everyone knows that you and the twins are together. I mean, the way they look at you, touch you when they think no one is watching, it is all so obvious, and half the women in Ecstasy wish they were you.”

  That surprised Jane so much her head cocked back. People were jealous of her? “What?”

  Missy rolled her eyes. “Oh, you heard me, and you know damn well that it’s the truth.” Silence fell upon them once again before Missy said, “Christa isn’t pregnant with Rys’s baby.” Jane felt her lips part at Missy’s words. She wouldn’t look at Jane, but the way she twisted her hands in her lap gave away the fact she was nervous.

  “How… I mean, how do you know that?” Everything inside of her was lighting up at Missy’s words. She really shouldn’t trust Missy, not since she’d been a conniving bitch since they were in grade school, but Missy’s whole demeanor was so foreign that Jane knew the woman was telling the truth.

  “Christa showed up at Trevor’s one night, which pissed me the hell off because everyone knows what a slut she is.” Jae didn’t correct Missy on the fact she was…promiscuous as well. “She was belligerent, spouting off that he couldn’t just throw her away after what he did to her. We finally got rid of her ass, and at that point I was pissed as hell. I wanted to know what was going on, and by the way he was acting, I knew it wasn’t good.” She blew out a breath and glanced out the passenger window. “I thought we were in a good spot in our relationship.” She snorted at her comment.

  Jane didn’t bother telling h
er that her boyfriend had mauled her over a month ago in the back of his car. Trevor was a piece of shit, and Missy might be a bitch but she wasn’t stupid. She knew how Trevor was, and Jane had no idea why the hell she wanted anything to do with him.

  “Of course, he wouldn’t tell me anything, just said it wasn’t a problem, and she wouldn’t be bothering us anymore. I let it go, but a few weeks after that, when Christa made that spectacle at Brooklyn’s, Trevor came home sloshed.”

  Jane didn’t question how Missy knew what happened at Brooklyn’s. After Christa dropped her little bomb, everyone in the whole town and probably the neighboring ones knew what went down.

  “I hadn’t forgotten about Christa coming to the house and hadn’t heard what happened at Brooklyn’s, so when I saw him drunk, I knew that was when I’d get the answers I wanted.”

  Jane wanted to tell her to hurry the hell up, that she had shit to do, like go see Rys and William, but until Missy finished telling her whatever it was she was trying to say, Jane would sit quietly and patiently.

  Missy chuckled humorlessly and turned her attention back to Jane. “He admitted to fucking Christa numerous times. The asshole didn’t even wear a condom!” Despite the anger in Missy’s voice, Jane didn’t miss the tears that started to slip out the corners of her eyes. The need to comfort Missy was strong, but Jane knew it wouldn’t be a welcome gesture. “He didn’t even deny knocking her up. Can you fucking believe that?” Missy sniffed and brushed the tears away. “He just told me that he wasn’t about to be tied down to a kid.”

  Not that Jane didn’t desperately need to believe what Missy said, but she found herself asking, “How do you know he’s telling the truth?” Missy gave Jane an incredulous look and then shook her head.

  “Because I confronted the bitch myself. The two of them had slept together while Trevor and I were supposed to be ‘exclusive’. She said she hadn’t slept with anyone but him during that time.” When Jane didn’t respond, Missy continued in a smaller voice, “She told me if Trevor wasn’t willing to man up, she’d find someone that would, someone that wouldn’t turn his back on her when the baby came.”

  “But if she is so sure Trevor is the father and she didn’t sleep with anyone else during that time, why would she try and pin it on Rys?”

  “Come on, Jane. It isn’t that hard to alter how far along you really are by a few weeks. What guy is going to be smart enough to realize that?” Jane sat there in stunned silence as she processed what Missy had just told her. “I told him I was going to tell you, that it wasn’t right to blame this on someone else. We fought outside of Slick’s before I came in. I was a bitch because I was so upset with him, with how he acts and how he treats people. I should have told you when I first found out, but I didn’t know how to tell you.” To Jane’s utter surprise for the umpteenth time that night, Missy grabbed Jane’s hand. “I’ve been a bitch and a horrible person. I don’t want to be the person that stands back and watches three people’s lives ruined.” Missy dipped her head and whispered, “I was just going to turn my head and let Rys take the heat for it. I didn’t want that for our life, but I realized Trevor isn’t the man I thought he was.” Missy lifted her head and smiled sadly. “I’ve been cruel to you and I’m sorry. So sorry.” Missy gave her hand one more squeeze before getting out of the car and shutting the door with a soft click.

  Jane watched her disappear into the shadows. For several long moments, all she could do was stare into the darkness. Rys hadn’t fathered Christa’s baby. She had no reason to doubt what Missy said. In fact, she would have assumed Missy would confirm her fear that Rys was, in fact, the father. The sound of her heart beating in her ears drew her out of her thoughts. She turned her car on and headed out into the street with one destination in mind. William’s and Rys’s house.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Jane turned off the car and sat there for a moment. All the lights were on despite the fact it was close to midnight. She knew they had work in the morning, so she questioned why in the world they were still up. The need to get out of her car was strong, but there was also a hesitant part of her that was afraid to make that move. For three weeks she had avoided them. It had been the hardest three weeks since their relationship had escalated. They had been inseparable, and now she was sitting outside their house after pushing them away so many times. Had they ever pushed her away? No. Never.

  Steeling herself, Jane made her way out of the car and up the steps of the porch. The screen door was open which she thought a bit odd, even if the weather was nice. It was almost midnight, for God’s sake! The sound of raised voices came out of the house, and Jane froze, not knowing if she should make her presence known.

  “What in the hell am I supposed to do, Will?” Rys voice was raised and came out like a rough growl.

  “How the hell am I supposed to know? You’re the one that fucked up, and now I have to pay for it.”

  The sound of heavy footfalls pacing the length of a wooden floor filled the sudden silence. “You don’t think I’m suffering here as well? She won’t see me either.”

  “And with good reason. You might be having a kid with someone other than Jane in the next nine months.”

  “Stop!” Rys yelled and Jane flinched. She had never heard the twins fight before, and she was part of it, part of why they were upset with each other.

  “I’ve told you a million different times that I can’t be the father of Christa’s baby. There is just no way.”

  “And what if you are, Rys? How do you think that is going to make Janey feel? You think she is going to want you then? What about me?”

  “What about you? You aren’t the one that lost the most important person in your life.”

  “No? No?!” Jane had never heard Will’s voice so loud and angry before. “You’re my fucking identical twin. She can’t look at you right now because you broke her heart. I am unfortunate enough to look just like you, and now she doesn’t want anything to do with me either.” Heavy breathing followed William’s words. “So, yeah, Rys. I’ve lost the person that means the world to me. I’ve lost the woman I love because you can’t keep your dick in your pants.”

  Rys’s laughter was anything but humorous. “I don’t remember you saying no when I offered to share a female or two. In fact…” Rys’s voice dropped lower. “You tag teamed quite a few of them, so don’t get all high-and-fucking-mighty on me.”

  “Yeah, well, at least I know bad news when I see it, and Christa Martine is bad fucking news, Rys.”

  Rys growled like some kind of wild animal, and then she heard a loud bang followed by shuffling around. Dammit, they were fighting. She didn’t bother knocking, just pulled the door open and walked quickly toward the scuffle. When she rounded the corner and came into the living room, she saw Rys and William throwing punches at each other. A lamp fell and broke on the floor, and their curses and grunts filled the room. The testosterone and rage in the room was thick as sin, and she took a hesitant step forward. She didn’t want to see them fight, not over this, not when there were so many other things that they could be focused on. Rys slammed his fist into Will’s side, and William reciprocated by throwing a punch into Rys’s abdomen. They both grunted and crashed into one of the end tables, sending the wood crumbling beneath their weight.

  “Stop.” They didn’t hear her and instead threw more punches. “Stop!” Both of them immediately did just that. Their gazes landed on her, and they heaved from the force of their breathing. Nothing was said for several long, tense moments, and then she licked her lips and said, “Please, stop fighting. It’s not worth it.” They broke apart and looked at each other.

  “You’re here? Like really here?” Rys said as he took a step toward her. His expression appeared disbelieving. “She’s here, William.” He took another step toward her. “Baby…” In the next instant, he had his arms wrapped her, and the pressure he used to hold her to him was almost suffocating. Head on his chest, Jane closed her eyes and inhaled the scent that was all Rys
.

  “I have been so lost without you, Jane,” Rys muttered into her hair, his voice low. Her fingers curled into the shirt at his abdomen, bringing him closer as she let the last three weeks melt away.

  “I’m so sorry. I’ve been an idiot shutting you two out. Neither you nor William has ever done that to me. I let you down.”

  “Shhh.” William was behind her, his hand moving her hair off her shoulder. “Don’t say that, sweetheart. We love you, no matter what. We are the ones that let you down.”

  Rys pulled back, and she lifted her head to look at him. Tears formed in her eyes, and she was angry at herself over it. Why was she even crying? The pads of Rys’s thumbs brushed beneath her eyes and wiped her tears away.

  “I’m so sorry about everything. I don’t know what the future holds with…well, with all of that, but I want you so damn much, baby.”

  “We both do,” William said from behind her, his mouth at the nape of her neck.

  “I—”

  “Rys, please.Stop.” Instantly he closed his mouth and looked down at her with mixed emotions. Worry was at the forefront, and she wished she could wipe it away. “I want to talk to you both.” Rys shared a look with William over her head and then nodded down at her.

  “Okay, Jane.” The uncertainty in his voice was clear. Hopefully after she told him what Missy had revealed, the tension that had wound itself tightly around the three of them would ease. She needed that, needed to get back to where they were.

  They walked over to the couch and William pushed aside the broken remnants of the turned over lamp. He looked sheepish when she watched him move the debris away with his booted foot. Jane sat on the couch while the guys took the two leather recliners across from her. The deep breath she inhaled did nothing to calm her down, but then she looked into both of their faces and smiled. It would be okay because she would make sure it ended that way.