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The B-Team thd-1

Page 8

by John Scalzi


  “They did all right,” Egan said again.

  “What more would you like them to do?” Rigney asked. “Walk on water?”

  “Where is this going, Abel?” Egan asked.

  “You said the most notable negotiation these folks did before this was another situation where they were forced to think on their feet and improvise,” Rigney said. “Has it occurred to you that the reason Abumwe and her people are on your B-list is not because they’re not good at what they do, but because you’re not putting them in the right situations?”

  “We didn’t know these negotiations were going to be the ‘right’ situation,” Egan said.

  “No, but now you know what are the right situations for them,” Rigney said. “High-risk, high-reward situations where the path to success isn’t laid out but has to be cut by machetes through a jungle filled with poison toads.”

  “The poison toads are a nice touch,” Egan said, reaching for another french fry.

  “You see what I’m getting at,” Rigney said.

  “I do,” Egan said. “But I’m not entirely sure I’m going to be able to convince the secretary that a bunch of B-listers is who she wants for high-risk, high-reward missions.”

  “Not all of them,” Rigney said. “Just the ones where the usual diplomatic bullshit won’t work.”

  “Why do you care?” Egan said. “You seem awfully passionate about a bunch of people you had no idea existed just a week ago.”

  “You say it yourself every time you scare your State Department middle managers,” Rigney said. “We’re running out of time. We don’t have the Earth anymore, and we need more friends than we’ve got if we’re going to survive. Part of that can be something like the Clarke crew already is-a fire team we parachute in when nothing else is working.”

  “And when they fail?” Egan said.

  “Then they fail in a situation where failure is an expected outcome,” Rigney said. “But if they succeed, then we’re much better off.”

  “If we appoint them to be this ‘fire team,’ as you say, then we’re already raising expectations for whatever they do,” Egan said.

  “There’s a simple solution for that,” Rigney said. “Don’t tell them they’re a fire team.”

  “How awfully cruel,” Egan said.

  Rigney shrugged. “Abumwe and her people are already aware that they’re not at the grown-ups’ table,” he said. “Why do you think she browbeat the Utche into negotiations? She knows an opportunity when she sees it. She wants those opportunities, and she and her team are going to beat their brains in to get them.”

  “And destroy their ships to get them, apparently,” Egan said. “This fire team idea of yours could get expensive, fast.”

  “What’s the plan for the Clarke’s crew?” Rigney asked.

  “It hasn’t been decided,” Egan said. “We might put Abumwe and her diplomatic team on a different ship. Coloma’s going to have to face an inquiry about intentionally putting her ship in the path of a missile. She’s going to get cleared, but it’s still a process. Wilson’s on loan from CDF Research and Development. Presumably at some point they’re going to want him back.”

  “Do you think you could put any decisions on the Clarke’s crew on hold for a few weeks?” Rigney asked.

  “You seem awfully excited about these people,” Egan said. “But even if I did put them in career limbo for your own amusement, there’s no guarantee the secretary would sign off on your ‘fire team’ concept.”

  “Would it help if the CDF had a list of fires it would prefer to be put out through diplomacy than gunfire?” Rigney asked.

  “Ah,” Egan said. “Now we’re getting to it. And I can already tell you how that idea’s going to go over. When I first joined the secretary’s team as CDF liaison, it took her six weeks to have a conversation with me longer than three words, all monosyllables. If I come to her with a list of requests from the CDF and a handpicked team, she’ll communicate to me with grunts.”

  “All the more reason to use this team,” Rigney said. “It’s full of nobodies. She’ll think she’s screwing us. Tell her about the request and then suggest these people. It’ll work brilliantly.”

  “Would you like me to ask her not to throw you in the briar patch while I’m at it?” Egan asked.

  “Just this one request for now,” Rigney said.

  Egan was quiet for a few moments as she picked at her fries. Rigney finished his burger and waited.

  “I’ll take her temperature on it,” Egan said, finally. “But if I were you, I wouldn’t get my hopes up.”

  “I never get my hopes up,” Rigney said. “It’s how I’ve lived this long.”

  “And in the meantime I’ll keep the Clarke crew from being reassigned elsewhere,” Egan said.

  “Thank you,” Rigney said.

  “You owe me,” Egan said.

  “Of course I do,” Rigney said.

  “Now I have to go,” Egan said, pushing up from the table. “More children to scare.”

  “You have fun with that,” Rigney said.

  “You know I do,” Egan said. She turned to go.

  “Hey, Liz,” Rigney said. “That estimate you give the kids, the one about humans having thirty years before we’re extinct. How much exaggeration is in that?”

  “Do you want the truth?” Egan asked.

  “Yes,” Rigney said.

  “Almost none at all,” Egan said. “If anything, it’s optimistic.”

  She left. Rigney stared at the remains of their meal.

  “Well, hell,” he said. “If we’re doomed, maybe I will have that second cheeseburger after all.”

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  John Scalzi

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