Somewhere Far Away

by E. L. Todd

  I wondered if he got hit on all the time. With his looks and success, he must.

  “I’m glad you did,” he said. “It’s sexy when a girl makes a move. It shows confidence—and confidence is a quality I look for.”

  “It’s a little unorthodox, but I’ve never been traditional.”

  “And I like that.” He drank his wine as he looked at me.

  He stared at me a lot, but I liked it. He gave me his full attention and didn’t play games.

  “I’m surprised you don’t have a girlfriend.”

  “What makes you think I would?” he asked.

  “You’re easy on the eyes and charming.”

  “And easily bored.” He ate quietly and didn’t say anything more about the subject. Perhaps he had a bad breakup recently and didn’t want to talk about it. Or maybe he just didn’t have anything to say. “Where did you learn to bake?”

  “My yaya.”

  He stilled. “Your what? Sorry?”

  “My yaya,” I said with a laugh. “It means grandmother in Greek.”

  “Oh.” He nodded his head in understanding. “I see.”

  “She taught me everything when I was young, and I just grew up on that knowledge. Now I make up a lot of my own recipes and do things my way. But she started it all.”

  “Did she work in a bakery?”

  “No. She just knows her way around the kitchen.”

  “Very cool.” He finished his plate and left it on the table. He wiped it clean and finished his wine. “I’m pretty limited in my abilities. But I know how to order take out.”

  “That’s a good skill to have.”

  He smiled slightly.

  “Will you excuse me?” I rose from the chair and set my napkin on the table.

  “Sure.” He watched me walk away, his eyes drilling into my back.

  After I did my business in the bathroom, I touched up my make up. My heart was racing because I really liked him. He had nice lips and a perfect body. But he was an interesting person too. He had a good balance of various qualities. And he was older. I liked older men. They were more mature than the guys I met at school.

  And he was scorching hot.

  After I gathered my bearings and headed back to the table, I saw Hawke talking to a woman. She looked his age, and she was pretty. She wore a tight dress with nude heels. Her hair was done in a classy way.

  The closer I got, the more irritated I became. Judging the way she was leaning close to him and flashing him flirtatious smiles, she was either hitting on him or already knew him romantically.

  I didn’t care, but it was pretty trashy to go after a guy who was clearly on a date. There were rules for that, especially between women.

  When I reached the table, Hawke spoke. “It was nice seeing you, Jessica.” Hawke didn’t seem irritated she was there, but he didn’t seem particularly happy either.

  She eyed me up and down quickly. The disappointment on her face told me she didn’t like me one bit even though I hadn’t said a word. “Call me.” She flipped her hair and walked away.

  The fact Hawke didn’t introduce me told me he didn’t want to. “Sorry about that.”

  “It’s okay.” I sat down and crossed my legs.

  Hawke didn’t mention his friend or how he knew her.

  And I didn’t ask.

  The check sat at the edge of the table, and it was clear Hawke had already paid it. “I asked you out. Remember?”

  That usual look of amusement came into his eyes. “I guess I’m traditional in some ways.”

  “Well, I owe you next time.” I shouldn’t assume there would be a next time but it slipped out. It wasn’t common for me to find a guy I really liked. Hawke and I had a connection, and I knew it could go further if we took the time to cultivate it. But I had no idea if that feeling was mutual.

  “We’ll see.” His eyes didn’t give his thoughts away like usual. “Ready to go?”

  “Yeah.”

  We left the restaurant and walked out to the sidewalk. Hawke hadn’t made a move to touch me, and I hadn’t either. I already asked him out so I wasn’t going to make the first move.

  As we headed to his truck down the street, his arm moved around my waist, and he pulled me closer to him. His torso was hard like a slab of concrete, and he felt warm like a personal heater. His scent washed over me, and I wanted that smell to be ingrained in my sheets.

  I gave him a flirtatious look that said I liked his hold. His large hand fit completely around my hip. His fingers squeezed me slightly, giving me a spike of adrenaline.

  “I had a great time tonight.”

  “Me too.”

  He opened the passenger door to his truck but kept his eyes on me. His lips were dangerously close to mine. It seemed like he might kiss me but he was still unsure about it.

  Without thinking, I leaned in and pressed my lips to his. The second we touched, I felt my lips burn. His full and soft lips felt right against mine. I made the move, but he took control the second we were combined. He gave me purposeful kisses, breathing into my mouth as he did it.

  Yum.

  He slowly pulled away then rubbed his nose against mine. “Ready to go somewhere quiet?” Then he waited for me to get into the seat.

  My hormones were doing all the talking. “Yes.” I didn’t want the kiss to end, but I knew standing on the sidewalk wasn’t the best place to do it. I got inside and pressed my thighs tightly together. His kiss was so good that I wanted it to go on forever. Now I was hot everywhere, and I felt sweat form on the back of my neck.

  Hawke got into the driver’s seat and started the engine. His hand immediately moved to my thigh and he squeezed it through my jeans. His large hand took up most of the area. I would love to feel those hands grab me everywhere.

  He drove to my house without speaking. He didn’t turn on the radio or initiate a conversation. His thoughts were probably exactly where mine were. His hand stayed in a respectable zone, but I probably wouldn’t swat it away if it went somewhere else.

  When we reached my house, he walked me to the front door. His hand moved around my waist again, keeping me anchored to him. The second we reached the porch, he grabbed the back of my neck and crushed his mouth to mine. Now he was much more aggressive, like this moment was all he’d been thinking about in the car. He felt my lips with his, and he sucked the bottom one like he’d done it a hundred times. His hands amplified his kiss. One moved into my hair and fisted it. The other gripped my hip aggressively, like I was his forever.

  He moved me to the door and pressed me against it. The length of his cock was defined through his jeans, and I could feel it against my stomach. It was impressive. The idea of him stretching me made the area between my legs immediately pool in desire. While I was confident and aggressive, I wasn’t an easy girl. I liked to take my time and cultivate a relationship. The sex was much better that way.

  But now I wasn’t sure what I wanted.

  His lips continued to devour mine, and his hands slowly slid up my waist until they reached my chest. He groped my tits aggressively, squeezing and massaging them.

  It felt so good.

  His lips moved to my neck, and he lathered the sensitive area with kisses while he continued to feel me up. His lips brushed across my ear. “I’ve been thinking about this all night. And it’s much better than I imagined.” His lips moved back to my neck and his hands disappeared under my shirt, feeling the skin of my stomach.

  I wanted this. I really wanted this.

  But I had to stop it. It was too quick. Sometimes rushing into something killed it before it could really begin. And I really liked Hawke. We’d only been on one date, but I knew there was something special between us. I couldn’t sabotage it for a night of passion. I wanted it to go somewhere. “Let’s save something for our next date…” I grabbed his hands and pulled them down.

  He pulled his lips away from my neck and looked into my eyes. There was obvious heat there, like he didn’t want it to end. He glanced a
t my lips like he was thinking about kissing me again.

  “This is where I say good night.”

  If he was disappointed, he hid it. “I hope you aren’t one of those girls who believes in the third date rule. Because it’s a stupid rule.”

  “No…but I believe in taking it slow.”

  He tilted his head slightly like he was confused. He stared at me in a way I’d never seen before. His eyes were blank. Perhaps too many thoughts were going through his mind for me to decipher. He stepped back slightly.

  His words echoed in my mind, and seeing his masculine outline in the dark was giving me second thoughts. We had a connection, and we both felt it. Was it stupid to wait out of principle? So what if we hardly knew each other? Lots of relationships began that way. “Actually…want to come inside?” I pulled my keys out of my clutch.

  He understood that I changed my mind, but there was no distinct reaction on his face. He didn’t come closer to me, remaining at a short distance. “Actually…I just remembered I’m taking my mom to the airport at 5 a.m. Better get home.” He stepped away and headed to the sidewalk. “I had a great time tonight. I’ll see you around.” Then he turned and headed to his truck. And not once did he look back.

  My keys were still in my hand, and I was suddenly aware of the light breeze that moved through my hair. The moment had changed so quickly, so intensely, that my brain couldn’t keep up with the pace. Hawke’s engine roared to life, and then he drove down the street. The red tint of his taillights shined in the darkness.

  And then he was gone.

  Laundry Day

  Francesca

  “Still hasn’t called?” Marie asked.

  “No.” A week had come and gone and I hadn’t heard anything from Hawke. After the way things ended on our date, the ball was in his court. I still wasn’t sure what happened.

  “Not even a text?”

  “Nope.” I leaned against the counter and crossed my arms over my chest.

  Marie straightened her apron while she had a concentrated look on her face. “What happened? Did you leave something out?”

  “Our date went really well. We had a great time and really got along. I even got a little jealous when I saw some girl talking to him.”

  “What girl?” she asked.

  “I don’t know…but it was clear they’ve been romantically involved. Or she wants to be romantically involved.”

  Marie held up her hand. “Whoa, hold on. This cunt hit on him while you were on a date?”

  “Pretty trashy, huh?”

  “Uh, yeah.” She shook her head with an irritated look on her face.

  “In her defense, I was in the bathroom. But still…pretty rude.”

  “Tell me about it.”

  “But when we got to his truck we had this kiss…”

  “Yeah?” She leaned forward like she wanted to hear the details.

  “And it was…really good. Maybe he’s just a really great kisser but there was so much chemistry there. I’m pretty sure he felt it too. Then when we got home, we started going at it against the door. Things got weird when I ended it.”

  “Why?” she asked.

  “I don’t know…” It still didn’t make any sense to me. “I said that’s as far as I go and he made some comment about how stupid it is to wait based on principle. Then I said something I shouldn’t have…”

  “What did you say?”

  “That we shouldn’t rush into things.”

  Marie raised an eyebrow. “And why was that a stupid thing to say?”

  “I’m not totally sure, but it obviously meant something to him. I changed my mind and invited him inside because I knew he was right. Why should we wait just to wait? We both had a great time, and we were really into each other. But that’s when he blew me off.”

  Marie cringed. “He blew you off? I don’t get it. You invited him inside, and he just changed his mind?”

  “I don’t get it either. I’m pretty sure he was lying about taking his mom to the airport, but I wasn’t going to call him out on it.”

  Marie pressed her lips tightly together while she considered my words. “We’re missing something here.”

  “But what?”

  “Maybe there was something else on his mind.”

  “I don’t know…” I wish it didn’t bother me but it did. If he really was a jerk, then I shouldn’t waste another moment thinking about him. But he didn’t have that personality at all. He was a good guy. I knew he was. Nothing was adding up and that bothered me most.

  And I admit I was hurt he hadn’t asked for a second date…

  The bell rang over the door and Marie glanced at the customer. Then she did a double take. “Shit, he’s here.”

  “Hawke?”

  She nodded then darted into the back room. “Talk to him.” The curtain closed as she disappeared.

  I was suddenly nervous even though I had no reason to be. I refused to be intimidated by anyone. Maybe I said something I shouldn’t have, but I had the right to say it. I approached the counter and saw him standing there.

  Hawke was in his typical work clothes. The slacks fit him snugly and so did the collared shirt. A small part of me regretted not seeing that beautiful man naked when I had the chance.

  “Hi.” What else was I supposed to say? Why haven’t you called me? No, I wasn’t one of those girls. Hope burned in my heart at his appearance. If he really never wanted to see me again, he wouldn’t have come in here at all.

  “Hi.” He stood with his hands in his pockets. “How’s it going?”

  “Good. You?”

  “I’ve been better,” he said. “I just got out of a meeting so I’m a little drained.”

  “Was it boring?”

  “No…just long.” He glanced up at the menu. “I’m going to need an espresso today—make it a double.”

  “Sure.” Were we not going to talk about our date? He was acting like it never happened. Did he not want to go out again? I already asked him out once, and I wasn’t going to do it again.

  “No muffins, I’m guessing?” He gave me that smile I’d fallen for. It reached his eyes like always.

  “No, not today.”

  “Darn.” He gave a half-hearted shrug.

  I rang him up.

  He handed me the cash as he watched my face.

  I returned the change.

  Then we just stared at each other.

  Seriously, that was it? Did I dream the whole date up? Didn’t he like me as much as I liked him? Why was he just staring at me? Was he going to say something?

  “Uh…can I have my coffee?”

  I’d never given it to him. God, I felt like an idiot. I was just staring at him, thinking he was going to say something. “Oh, sorry.” I turned my back to him and got the coffee, feeling my cheeks redden in embarrassment. Then I turned back around and tried to keep a brave face.

  “Thanks.” He took it and added a sleeve. Then he turned away.

  “So, is that it?” Why did I just blurt that out loud? Especially at work? Why couldn’t I just keep my mouth shut?

  He stopped then turned back to me. “Excuse me?”

  Now I wish I hadn’t said anything. This wasn’t the place for the conversation. “We went out and had a great time and I haven’t heard from you…and you left in such an odd way.” I’d never been in this situation before. Guys were usually pretty easy to read, and I’d never been blown off.

  He glanced at the people in the lobby before he turned back to me. “It just didn’t feel right.”

  What? What didn’t feel right? We had a great time. Everything was perfect. Our kiss…did he always have kisses like that? Because I’d never felt anything like that in my life. Even though I was hurt and upset, I couldn’t deny what I felt. “Just because I wouldn’t sleep with you?”

  His eyes narrowed like he’d been provoked. “No, of course not. You invited me inside, remember?”

  “Then…what happened?”

  He held my gaze with
out blinking. “We’re just from different worlds, Frankie. I really like you but…I’m not the kind of man you want.”

  “And what kind of man are you, exactly?” I should just let him walk away but I was struggling. I’d never been dumped like that before. He was into me one moment, and we were having a great time, and then he forgot about me the second he turned around.

  He leaned toward me and lowered his voice. “The kind that isn’t good enough for you.”

  ***

  I would never understand what happened with Hawke, and I needed to learn to let it go. I had no idea what he meant when he said he wasn’t good enough for me. He was a great person. What was he talking about?

  No matter what happened or what he meant, it didn’t change the fact that it was over. I didn’t want to be with someone so vague anyway. It would cause more migraines than orgasms, and I just didn’t have the time to deal with drama.

  He had drama written all over him.

  I tried to forget about him but it was surprisingly hard. When I folded my laundry, I thought about the way he looked across the table. He stared at me like I was the only woman in the room. And he was charming and polite…he made me laugh. And the physical chemistry between us couldn’t be quenched with a fire extinguisher.

  I refused to mourn over a guy that wasn’t worth my time, so I moved on and went on other dates. I met a few guys through mutual friends and at the bars. All of them were attractive, some were clingy, but none of them were a good match. I just didn’t feel anything for any of them.

  Not like I did with Hawke.

  Why? Why did I want a guy clearly unavailable? It was so annoying. There was a plethora of guys at school. Why couldn’t I just like one of them? After a month had passed, I thought about Hawke less often.

  But I hadn’t forgotten him.

  He hadn’t come into The Grind in a long time, and I assumed he never would again. He probably didn’t want to see me, not after I confronted him like that. And I didn’t blame him. That definitely didn’t project me in my best light.

  But one day, on a Monday, he walked inside. Like always, he wore his business clothes with his satchel over his shoulder. A light amount of facial hair was on his face, and I liked the look. It was more rugged and highlighted his nice cheekbones.