The Reward of Anavrea

by Rachel Rossano

  Turning to Jayne, Ireic extended his hand. “Lady Jayne, will you please rise?”

  With obvious reluctance, Jayne rose.

  “Citizens of Ashwyn, I present to you, Lady Jane Alain of Ashwyn, Mistress of Ashwyn Vargar and the lands adjacent.”

  The response was deafening as the men rose to their feet and cheered. Liam stood and bowed formally to her. As he lifted his head again, he glimpsed a glimmer of fear in the depths of her blue eyes. Before he could be sure of its existence, it disappeared. The formal mask of a shy smile fell into place, and she inclined her head toward the gathered men.

  Ireic signaled for the first course to be served before any of the men could call for a speech. Liam shot him a look of thankfulness. Jayne wasn’t ready to address such a crowd.

  As they resumed their seats, her slender hands were shaking so she could not risk reaching for her food. She hid them in the napkin on her lap. Ireic leaned over Lirth to speak to her. Jayne's eyes met Liam’s in their course to the king’s face. The fear that lingered in their shadows caused Liam’s heart to cry out that he do something to comfort her.

  Liam knew he could do nothing now, but as soon as the main course was served, he would rescue her. One thing he was sure of, his company was better than this. If Ireic and Lirth were correct, she would be more at ease in the study discussing the details of running the vargar. Turning his attention to his own plate, Liam began to plan. Periodically he stole a glance in her direction to measure how much she ate.

  ~~~~~~

  Jayne stared at her plate. The leg of mutton lying on it was a nauseating sight, but it was preferable to the sea of male faces spread out before her beyond the far edge of the table. She could feel their eyes on her, watching her, waiting for a sign, a movement, a mistake. Her hands were hot and clammy beneath the heavy cloth of the napkin, but she didn’t dare make a move toward the food. In a moment, she had gone from an insignificant bystander to the center of attention, and she wasn't ready to be mistress of the vargar.

  Lirth and Ireic carried on a conversation in low tones she couldn’t follow and Liam was out of sight farther down the table.

  “Not hungry?” the servant asked as she bent over Jayne’s left shoulder.

  Jayne shook her head as her stomach twisted again.

  Taking that as the cue to clear the dish, the girl gracefully removed the plate and replaced it with another filled to the edges with venison. “Perhaps this will tempt your palate, my lady,” she said.

  Jayne closed her eyes as the effort to not vomit brought tears. She took a deep shuddering breath and pushed against the urge.

  “Come with me.” A large warm hand brushed her shoulder and down her arm to seek her hand. Enclosing it in a firm grip, Liam drew her to her feet. With a gentle palm against the small of her back, he escorted her into the corridor. Jayne held together until she stepped into the dim shadow of the doorway. Then she couldn’t hold back the shaking anymore.

  “Hush,” Liam whispered. He caught her as she collapsed. Moving her so she could lean against the wall, he then retreated to give her space. “It will be all right, Jayne, just relax. You are safe. Deep breaths,” he coached. His words brought her thoughts back to their time in the study as he soothed her after she told him her family history. His steady, low voice reassured her that everything would be well as she slowly overcame the convulsions.

  “Are you feeling better?” he asked after a moment of silence.

  “Yes, thank you.” She looked up at him. His dark, blue eyes watched her face with concern.

  “He didn’t warn you ahead of time, did he?” he asked.

  Jayne shook her head.

  “You handled it well, considering.” The sounds coming from beyond the doors to the main hall changed, signaling the end of the meal. Liam glanced in that direction. “Come, we can go to the study. We had an appointment anyway.” Offering her his hand, he stepped closer.

  Jayne looked at it a moment, suspended in the air between them. Then forcing herself to move, she laid her hand in his. His strong fingers closed around it and drew her down the corridor toward the study.

  Chapter Fifteen

  As Liam and Jayne approached the study door, a small shadow stepped out into the lamplight. “Jayne?” Rowana asked.

  “What is it?” Jayne immediately replied as the girl’s tear-stained face turned toward her. Pulling her hand from Liam’s loosened grasp, she knelt on the cold floor. “What is wrong?”

  “I know we aren’t supposed to bother you after bedtime, but Trina is coughing. She can’t stop and we are getting worried.” Silent tears filled the girl’s dark eyes.

  “It will pass,” Jayne whispered, gathering her close. The croup is back. Fear whispered through her, but she shoved it away. She needed to be calm. Panic would just make things worse. Besides it could be nothing but a cough. “Where is she now? Did you take her to Patti?” she asked, smoothing back the Rowana’s sleep tousled curls.

  Rowana shook her head. “Patti wasn’t in the kitchen when I looked.”

  “Where is Trina?”

  “In the bedroom, Ryana is sitting with her. She was keeping us awake.”

  “Tell me about her cough as we walk.” Jayne rose and taking Rowana’s hand walked off toward the bedroom that the four of them shared. Oh, please, Kurios, let it not be croup.

  “It is like last time,” Rowana answered, confirming Jayne’s fears. Only a year ago she had almost lost Trina to the croup and now it was back. Perhaps to claim her this time. The thought rose unbidden, and it took all of her resolve to shove it away. Please, Kurios, don’t take her.

  Even before she opened the door to the darkened room, she heard the telltale rasping bark and following wheeze. Ryana sat with Trina in her lap next to the table. Trina turned terror-filled eyes toward the new arrivals. Opening her arms to Jayne, she silently begged for comfort. A spasmodic cough shook her small body as Jayne crossed the room. Enveloping her in an embrace, Jayne buried her face in the child’s sweaty hair.

  “Hush,” she whispered, kissing the little one’s forehead and running a soothing hand over the aching ribs. “Remember from last time. Calm is best. Breathe slowly and evenly, and don’t panic.”

  “I...” A cough interrupted whatever the child was trying to say, and she melted into barking sobs.

  All Jayne could do was hold her and soothe her as best she could.

  “What do you need?” Liam asked.

  “She needs to breathe moist air and stay calm. I have mint extract that might help. The best place to go is the kitchen.”

  “Then let me carry her,” Liam offered. Stooping down he offered open arms to Trina.

  Before Jayne could protest he didn’t have to help, Trina released her grip on Jayne’s neck and reached for Liam, coughing as she moved. Jayne didn’t have the heart to deny the child. Explaining that Liam was a busy man and probably had better things to do than nurse a sick child would only upset Trina and the twins. Considering that keeping Trina calm was crucial, Jayne released her hold.

  Gathering Trina against him in an awkward, but gentle movement, Liam said, “She will be cold on the trip to the kitchen.”

  “I will get a blanket,” Ryana offered.

  Rowana moved toward Trina’s clothing chest. “I will get her socks.”

  Trina cuddled against Liam’s chest as though it was the safest place in the world. The coughing continued to shake her small shoulders, but she seemed content to press her flushed face against his shirt, soaking it with silent tears. Liam’s large hand spread across her narrow back, rubbing in small soothing circles. Something within Jayne’s chest moved and a strange sensation flooded her.

  “I will fetch the mint extract and meet you in the kitchen,” she finally said. Liam was already rising. His attention focused on his task as he tucked the blanket around his precious armful. Liam and Ryana left the room still settling Trina in the blanket and Rowana trailing, thick woolen socks in hand.

  Jayne moved to the
medicine chest, unlocked it, and removed the bottle of mint extract. Her thoughts were a jumble of strange thoughts of Liam’s potential children and fear of losing Trina. Kurios, what is happening to me? I am not usually this unfocused. Taking a deep breath, she straightened her shoulders and aligned her thoughts. Please spare Trina. You know how I love her. I am not sure I could bear to lose her, Father.

  The next seven hours passed in a blur of fear, tears, coughing, steam, and prayer. Sometime near midnight, Jayne sent the twins off to bed. They protested, but she insisted. Three draining hours passed as the three remaining watchers fought each wave of coughing with steam, mint, and patient care.

  When silence fell over the kitchen, Jayne sank onto a bench and laid her head on the table. Her head was throbbing, and her heart and thoughts kept following strange paths. Thoughts of Liam and strong emotional reactions she’d never had to deal with before kept attacking her concentration.

  “I think the cough is easing,” Liam commented. Trina sprawled in his lap as he sat near the fireplace. Her limbs were limp in exhaustion, her flushed face turned toward the steaming kettle sitting on the table. Her sweat-soaked nightgown clung to her as she slept.

  “It has been a while since the last fit,” Jayne agreed. Moving slowly with weariness, she rose to her feet and crossed to him. She bent and leaned an ear close to the child’s mouth. The slow relaxed breathing of a child asleep was interrupted by only a raspy whisper as her breath caught slightly on its path in and out of her lungs. It was an improvement to the earlier wheezing.

  “I think she will sleep fine now.” Jayne laid a hand against the flushed cheek. “She is still warm, but that could be from the heat in here.”

  “I am probably warm to the touch too from sitting so close to the fire,” Liam agreed. “Is the coughing likely to return? Is it safe to return her to the bedroom, or should she sleep in here?”

  Jayne raised her gaze to find him observing her, his eyes dark with concern. Her stomach tightened as the emotion in their depths changed, and something within her breast answered.

  Moving away, she straightened her skirts. “I think she should stay here. The worst is over for tonight, but it might return. I will go fetch bedding for her.”

  Without waiting for a word from Liam, she slipped out the door. Pausing outside, she leaned against the cold stone of the wall and took a deep cleansing breath of cool early morning air. What is happening to me, Kurios?

  ~~~~~~

  Liam watched the corner of her skirt disappear into the corridor with weary concern. Don’t let her shut me out, Kurios, he prayed.

  As the evening progressed into morning, he had hope, as Jayne’s walls crumbled. Unguarded looks and confused actions slipped through the cracks, hinting at the turmoil hidden behind her defenses. You know even more than I do, Father, how she talks herself into being stubborn. I know you have a reason for making me love her as I do. Give me the wisdom to woo her. Show me how to get through her defenses. Help me to prove to her I am worthy of her trust. Please, Kurios.

  The child in his arms stirred. “Jayne?” she murmured.

  “Hush.” He placed a gentle hand against her moving head. “Jayne will be right back. Rest, little one, the worst is over.”

  “I will, Liam,” she replied. Readjusting her position so that her head was tucked beneath his chin and her left hand clutched his tunic, she relaxed against him.

  “Everything will be all right.” Gently he ran his hand up and down her back. “Sleep, little one, everything will be fine.” If only he could believe that was the truth with Jayne and him.

  ~~~~~~

  “Where is Liam?” Braxton demanded as he came upon Jayne in the hall.

  Jayne looked up at him over the folded bedding in her arms. “I left him in the kitchen with Trina, why?”

  “We just received news of raiders on the border. They attacked three villages in the east and we need to stop them before they reach another. The king has ordered us to move out immediately.”

  “What about the vargar? You cannot leave us undefended.”

  “We won’t,” Braxton assured her. “Here, let me carry those.” Then, without waiting for her to agree, he plucked the bedding from her arms. “Lead me to the kitchen.”

  Obeying, Jayne walked in the direction needed.

  “The king is taking his men. He is intent on Liam bringing his men, which will leave you with the men that have been trained since our arrival, a company of perhaps one hundred. It will be enough to defend the vargar from most anything. If there is any sign of trouble from Lord Klian, call everyone from the village into the vargar and shut the gates. It is better to be safe and over-reacting than to leave the villagers to the mercy of Lord Klian.”

  “What do you mean when you say I must call in the villagers?”

  Braxton stopped and regarded her with a frown. “I will not be leaving behind many officers. As Mistress of the Vargar, you are their commander. Don’t worry, they will obey you.”

  “But,” Jayne protested, until an approaching man in the king’s colors interrupted.

  “The king is calling for an assembly in the courtyard in an hour. I still cannot find Lord Tremain, sir.”

  “I know where he is, follow me.”

  The two of them moved quickly toward the kitchen. Jayne could do nothing but follow. When she finally caught up, outside the kitchen door, the king’s man was disappearing down the corridor and Braxton stood inside the door.

  “The message says there are about three hundred men on horseback and foot The ruffians surrounded and then attacked, killing men and animals. They took all the harvested crops, leaving only what they could not find.”

  “There were no identifying markings that might associate them with a tribe or baron?” Liam’s voice asked from within.

  Jayne paused in the hall. A panicky feeling closed on her throat and her mind screamed for everything to slow down. It was too much. The declaration that she was Lady of Ashwyn, Trina developing croup, and now the king was leaving and taking Liam and his men with him. She was in command of a hundred trained warriors.

  Her chest ached, and it had nothing to do with exhaustion. Jayne felt cold and detached. Her brain noted the symptoms of shock even as her body refused to move. She must have collapsed, because she was lying down and Liam’s voice was calling her name.

  “Jayne.” Someone was rubbing her hands. Patti said words a long ways off that she couldn’t understand. “Go get me some water.” A hand brushed her cheek. “Come on, Jayne. Open your eyes for me.” Despite the calmness of his words, an undercurrent of fear threaded through Liam’s voice.

  “Thanks,” he said, moving his arm as though grasping an object. Then a cold and wet cloth brushed the right side of her face from forehead to chin. “Jayne.”

  Slowly she opened her eyes. Liam’s face leaned over her, his eyes almost black with worry. “What...”

  “Hush,” he commanded, pressing a finger to her lips. “Just lie there and relax. You are fortunate that Braxton turned around when he did or would have had a nasty bump on your head.”

  “She is coming around?” Braxton asked.

  “You will be fine,” Liam assured her. “Now just stay still while I go make you a bed.

  “What set it off?”

  “It has been a trying night for her,” Liam commented as he rose to his feet. “Help me over here.”

  “The king is waiting for you.”

  “He is just going to have to wait a moment longer. I am not leaving until she is safe. She can sleep in here with Trina. I will let Patti know what has happened. She will look after them.”

  Jayne’s eyes closed and unconsciousness washed over her in spite of the hard floor at her back. She wasn’t aware of how much time passed, but suddenly she was being lifted. Panicked, she grabbed for something solid. Her hands found a shoulder.

  “I am just moving you to the bedding,” Liam informed her.

  Forcing her eyes open, Jayne looked up to find
Liam’s face close to hers. He was kneeling so he could ease her onto a quilt. “Thank you,” she said.

  Liam’s gaze fell on her and an intense emotion flooded his face for a moment. Then his face broke into a sad half smile. “You’re welcome, Jayne. Promise me you will take care of yourself.”

  “I promise,” she agreed as he withdrew.

  “Now, sleep. You will feel better after you have rested a few hours. Will you say goodbye to the children for me?”

  Jayne nodded even as exhaustion numbed her senses. Something warm brushed her forehead as her eyes closed. “Be well,” Liam whispered in her ear, and then she remembered nothing more.

  ~~~~~~

  It took every ounce of self-discipline Liam had to walk out of the kitchen. Jayne’s vulnerable sleeping form lying so silent and still called to him to check on her. He wanted to stay and stand watch over her as she slept. But, his king was calling for him. She would be fine under Patti’s care. She had survived for years without him, and she would continue making do. Please, Kurios, keep her.

  “Ah, there you are,” Ireic greeted him as he emerged into the courtyard. “How is Lady Jayne? Braxton mentioned something about an incident.”

  Crossing to his mount, Liam swung up into the saddle before turning to greet his sovereign with a half bow. “All she needs is a night’s sleep, sire. Trina, her youngest sister, is sick. Jayne overextended herself in her nursing last night.”

  “I am glad to hear that she will recover. How is Trina?”

  “The worst is over, sire.”

  “We should leave, my liege,” the captain of the guard announced. “The men are ready.”

  “Then let us be on our way,” Ireic replied, turning his horse’s head toward the gate. Liam followed suit and with a heavy heart urged his mount forward.

  Protect her, Father, as only you can, he prayed as they cleared the main gate and began their descent to the village.