Willing

by Lucy Monroe

  “You are.”

  “I tried. I thought my dad’s love depended on me being the best soldier I could be. I didn’t realize he loved me for being me until a couple of years ago.”

  “What happened then?”

  “I got shot on assignment and almost died. I was in a hospital in the Middle East for ten weeks.” Remembering that time made her shiver despite the hot water bubbling around her. “He cancelled his spring training session and flew out to be with me. He sat beside my hospital bed that first night and cried, telling me how much he loved me and begging me not to die. I’d never seen him cry before. I couldn’t talk much, but I tried to tell him I would be okay. He never left my room until the danger zone was past.”

  “He realized that what he’d raised you to be put you at risk in just the way he’d been trying to protect you from all your life.”

  “You’re pretty smart. I think that’s exactly how he felt.”

  “I read enough of his journals to realize how he would have reacted to you almost dying. It would have hit me the same way.”

  “You and my father have a lot in common.”

  “Not so much. He succeeded in protecting you.”

  “He didn’t think so when I got shot. He kept saying he was sorry, and I couldn’t understand why. Now I do. But one thing became very clear: He didn’t love me because I was a superior soldier. He loved me because I was his daughter.”

  “Is that when you decided to get out of the business?”

  “When I realized I didn’t have to be a soldier for my dad to love me, I asked myself if I wanted to spend the rest of my life being one. The answer was no.”

  “You’d rather work with computers?”

  “In some capacity, yes. I’m not like Claire and Hotwire, though. I’d be content to work in a job that used my computer skills, but didn’t focus on them.”

  “So, you don’t know if you’ll take the job Wolf and Hotwire offered you with their security business?”

  “No, I don’t. There’s a whole wide world out there, and I don’t know where I want to live in it or what I want to be. It’s pretty strange realizing at the age of twenty-six I can be anything I want.”

  “All I ever wanted was to be a Special Forces soldier. I chose the Rangers because the army was the easiest military organization to join.”

  “Why did you get out?”

  “After my mom died, I couldn’t stay in it.”

  “Because she asked you to leave the army and come home to take care of your dad and you refused? You felt guilty having your dream when your mom was dead.”

  “Yes.”

  She understood, but she thought it was such a waste. “You’re an incredible soldier, Daniel.”

  “There’s a lot more freedom being a merc than there was in the Rangers.”

  “Yes, but I think you would have been happy if you’d stayed.”

  He pulled her back against him, tucking her head into his shoulder again, but didn’t respond. The silence lasted a long time, and she let her gaze drift lazily across the now star laden sky.

  “My dad is up for parole this year.” His voice after such an extended silence surprised her, but no more than the words.

  “I thought you didn’t keep track of him.”

  “I don’t, but Sergeant Major does. He’s gone to visit Thunder in prison.”

  “Does he encourage you to go, too?”

  “No. He says that kind of thing is something a man can only do if his soul leads him to it.”

  Daniel’s sergeant major was a wise man.

  “Do you want to talk to your dad again?”

  “I want to ask if the drinking was worth killing her.” Josie knew with the same instincts that had saved her life more than once that Daniel wanted to ask a whole lot more than that, but she said nothing. If he ever did decide he wanted to see his father, she hoped Daniel would let her be there for him because no matter how hard he sounded, his heart wasn’t as invulnerable as he wanted to believe.

  “Has he told the sergeant major he wants to see you?”

  “If he has, Master Sergeant Cordell didn’t pass it on, but he wouldn’t.”

  “No matter what you decide, you’re a good man, Daniel.”

  “You’re good for me, Josette.”

  “Thanks.”

  In her mind, they had spent enough time talking about deep subjects. Daniel needed his thoughts directed to something more pleasant, and she had a pretty good idea how to do that.

  Slipping her hand up his thigh, she brushed it quite deliberately against his sex. His body went instantly rigid, and she could hear the increased pounding of his heart against her head.

  She smiled and relaxed against him as if she hadn’t a care in the world, while at the same time guiding her hand beneath his waistband. “Keep your eyes on the stars, Daniel.”

  Anyone looking at them from outside would think she was just resting against him while they both unwound in the spa. Her hand slid inexorably downward until her fingers tangled with the light, curling patch of hair above his penis.

  His hand latched on to her wrist, stopping her from moving lower. “What are you doing?”

  “Can’t you tell?”

  “We’re in a public place, Josette, or hadn’t you noticed?”

  “What I noticed is that the bubbles make it impossible to see what is happening under the water.”

  “You don’t think my raw shout of ecstasy will give you away?”

  She laughed softly, wiggling her fingers against him even if she couldn’t reach her main target. “That’s a long way off. If you keep your face expressionless, no one will know what I’m doing. You’re good at controlling your temper, Daniel. Do you think you can control your passion?”

  “You make it hard,” he growled.

  She grinned at the double entendre. “Don’t you like it?”

  “Yes…,” he hissed, and his grip slackened.

  She immediately went in search of and found his penis. She began stroking up and down his length. “Just relax and let me pleasure you.”

  “You are pure pleasure, sweetheart, but I’m not sure this isn’t torture.” He groaned as she squeezed his quickly growing member, and his head fell back against the stone edge of the spa.

  She snuck a peek at him and smiled. His eyes were closed, and his face was impassive, but there was a line of stress around his mouth. Arrows of pleasure shot through her core at the evidence of how strongly she affected him. She turned her head away, her eyes fixed on the stars overhead.

  It felt deliciously naughty to have her hand inside his swim trunks and touching him intimately while anyone looking on would think she was doing no more than contemplate the night sky. With a sense of wanton delight, she slid her palm over the head of his penis. Wetness more slick and silky than the water told her he was closer to coming than she could have imagined, and she felt a corresponding moisture between her legs.

  She played with the silky wetness, rubbing it over his head with her palm and then caressing his length in turn until his legs were jerking with the effort to stay still. She felt close to orgasm herself, and he hadn’t even touched her. She stroked him, enjoying the sounds of pleasure and need he was making and letting her mind run wild with images of him inside her.

  Suddenly he erupted from the water, lifting her from the pool with him.

  She squeaked out a shocked, “Daniel,” but he ignored her surprised protest and carried her at double time to their room, the expression on his face one that would live with her for a long time.

  He was a feral warrior claiming his mate, and she exulted in being that woman.

  Daniel carried Josie into their room, his body on a collision course with a desire he could no longer control. Her little green bikini had started a chain reaction in him that was set to explode with nuclear proportions any second.

  Stepping over the threshold, he kicked the door shut with enough force to leave it reverberating on its hinges.

  �
��Daniel?” Josie’s eyes were fixed on him with a mixture of breathless passion and trepidation.

  “I want you,” he growled down at her and then took possession of her mouth with all the hunger crashing through him.

  He ate at her lips, tasting the sweet warmth that she reserved for him alone. His tongue pressed into the seam of her lips, and she gave him entrance, letting him taste her, tasting him, sucking on his tongue as though she couldn’t get enough of his mouth against hers.

  The need to bury himself inside her expanded with each slide of her tongue against his and the swollen responsiveness of her lips until it was too big to contain. He dropped her to her feet, but couldn’t stop kissing her long enough to do something about the storm raging through him.

  Finally, with a monumental effort of will, he broke the kiss and stepped back.

  Damn, that little nothing of a swimsuit was going to give him a heart attack. The water had turned the green fabric dark, but it clung to her obviously aroused nipples and swollen curves in a way designed to send him over the edge of reason. If he wasn’t already there. His gaze shot down to where two small bows held the secrets of her femininity hidden behind a shimmering wet bit of fabric.

  He wanted to get rid of that barrier.

  “Take it off,” he ordered, his tone so guttural it was a wonder it didn’t scare her.

  He forced himself to look at her face and make sure, but she didn’t look frightened at all, just dazed. Her eyes were dilated with passion, and her lips pouted an invitation to be taken again.

  She licked them. “What?”

  “Take off your swimsuit.” He’d managed a marginal improvement in his tone, but not enough to make his words sound like anything but a demand.

  “Is that an order, sir?”

  “Yes.”

  “Then I’d better obey. I don’t want to be court-martialed.” The words were teasing, but her voice was filled with desire.

  He waited for her to comply, too far gone to help her without ruining the suit.

  She reached around behind her and undid the bottom string holding her top in place. It fell down her sides, pulling the material away at the edges, but not revealing what he most needed to see.

  “The other one, too.”

  She reached up and untied the bow at her neck, pulling the top farther up until the underswell of her breasts showed, but nothing else. Her eyes glowed feminine challenge at him as she peeled the top away to reveal dark red nipples, puckered and swollen. She cupped her own breasts and rotated her palms over her turgid peaks until he thought he would explode in his trunks from watching her.

  Her head tipped back, her mouth parting and her breathing rupturing. “This feels good, Daniel, but not nearly as good as it does when you touch me.”

  “Then let me touch you.”

  He started forward, but she put her hand up. “Not yet.”

  He stopped, every muscle in his body vibrating with tension at the stress of holding back.

  “I’m not finished.” Her hands dropped to her sides, and she tugged at the ends of the bows on either side of her hips.

  Sweat broke out on his brow, and his fingers curled into tight fists with the effort it took not to reach out and touch her.

  With teasing slowness, she unraveled the ties, but the wet suit stayed attached to her body.

  “Pull it off.” He kept his hands locked at his sides, needing to watch her unveil herself for him on a primitive level he couldn’t begin to understand. “Please.”

  Using them to tug the bottoms away from her skin, she spread her legs, and the green scrap of material fell to the floor, leaving her gloriously naked.

  The burnished brown curls at the juncture of her thighs glistened with moisture that could be from the spa or her own excitement. The scent emanating off of her said she was very aroused, and he needed to taste that wetness to tell.

  He fell to his knees in front of her and pressed her lips apart with his fingers. More glistening moisture beckoned as well as her clitoris, deep red with arousal. He put his mouth on her, and she screamed his name, her fingers locking tightly in his hair.

  Swirling his tongue around her swollen bud, he reveled in the way she thrust her hips toward him, silently demanding more. He wanted to give it to her and changed the angle of his mouth so he could taste her very essence.

  So sweet. He could eat her like this into eternity.

  With a desperate rhythm, she pleasured herself on his tongue, but her panting pleas told him, she couldn’t find the ultimate satisfaction without his cooperation.

  He wanted to be inside her when it happened and surged to his feet. She swayed, and he reached out to steady her, ready to pull her to him and make love.

  But she stepped back. “Wait right here.”

  “Where are you going?”

  “I’m still wet.”

  “That’s not a problem.”

  “I mean my body,” she croaked on a laugh that should have been impossible considering how excited they both were.

  She spun on her heel and disappeared into the bathroom. She reappeared scant seconds later holding a fluffy bath towel. She used it to dry herself off, touching herself in places he was dying to taste again, and then moved forward until she stood directly in front of him.

  “I want to dry you off, too.”

  “Okay.” His voice cracked like an adolescent’s, and he didn’t even care. “But hurry.”

  She started by taking his trunks off, carefully pulling the wet nylon over his throbbing hard-on and then pushing it down his thighs until he was as naked as she was.

  “Step out of them,” she instructed, and he did, wondering how long he could let her be in charge.

  If he’d thought the way she dried herself off was erotic foreplay, it was nothing compared to the way she used the towel to soak up excess moisture from his skin while exciting him to a painful level of arousal.

  “I need you,” he whispered thickly as he lifted her against him.

  “I need you, too, Daniel. Always.”

  He couldn’t concentrate on the significance of that word, but he relished the knowledge she was as much his as he was hers. The ongoing obsession was a shared one.

  She locked her legs around him like she’d done in the pool. This time there was no barrier of swimsuits to get in their way, and his sex pushed up inside of her. She pressed downward, so slick with her own excitement that he achieved penetration in one smooth advance.

  Wrapping her arms around his head, she kissed him with voracious passion he more than matched. Using his hands on her hips, he moved her up and down on him, gyrating his pelvis with each thrust, and she came without warning on his fourth surge upward.

  She convulsed around him, her body locked to his with complete and utter abandon. He couldn’t stop thrusting, and she made a guttural noise low in her throat, tearing her lips from his.

  “Daniel, it’s too much!”

  He just shook his head, unable to verbalize, but she wasn’t trying to get out of his arms, so he didn’t stop. Suddenly, she buried her face in his neck, and her body shook in a second orgasm. She bit him, and he reveled in the small violence, feeling his own orgasm build at the base of his shaft.

  He wanted to drive for fulfillment with everything in him. Moving until he could press her against the wall, he started thrusting inside her with the power and depth he needed.

  “I’m going to come!”

  Chapter 16

  Josie shook her head frantically, her hair sweeping against his chest. “Stop, Daniel.”

  Was she crazy? “I can’t.”

  “You have to.” She grabbed his head by the hair and pulled. “You’re not wearing a condom.”

  For the first time since he became sexually active, he seriously considered finishing without it, but that wouldn’t be fair to Josie.

  He barely had the strength to make it to the bed, but he did, and he laid her down before scrambling for a condom. He put it on with shaking fingers, his
body strung so tight, he was a hairsbreadth from snapping.

  He came back over her, looking down into her beautiful face. “You know the damage could already have been done?”

  “My period is due any day. You’re safe.” There was something in her voice he didn’t like, but he forgot about it as she pulled his body into hers once again.

  He wanted to come so bad he could taste it, but he needed her to be with him, not merely accepting his body into hers as reciprocation for the pleasure he’d given her. He leaned down and took a ripe raspberry nipple into his mouth and started sucking.

  Her fingers dug into his shoulders. “I love it when you take me in your mouth,” she panted, her willingness to go on the journey of pleasure with him once again lacing every syllable.

  He didn’t reply, but kept stimulating her with his teeth and tongue, moving to her other nipple as she started to writhe under him again. She whimpered and arched toward him as his hand moved between their bodies to find her already swollen sweet spot and touch it in the way he’d learned brought her the most pleasure.

  She thrust upward, and they moved together, both seeking the ultimate pleasure in each other’s bodies.

  Rational thought disintegrated as sensation overtook him, and pressure built until he knew his explosion was imminent.

  “Come with me,” he demanded.

  “Yes.” She went stiff, her whole body arching wildy against him, and they came together with cataclysmic force.

  The next two days were idyllic. Josie and Daniel played in the pool, talked about their pasts and made love.

  On the third morning at the hotel, Josie woke up to cramps, and she turned over in the bed, moaning as pain shot through her lower back and abdomen.

  She’d never understood how she could be so incapacitated by something women the world over experienced on a monthly basis, but debilitating pain and exhaustion accompanied her period pretty much every month. Thank God for ibuprofen. It had saved a mission from total meltdown failure more than once.

  She crawled out of bed, knowing if she didn’t take care of things right that minute, she would regret it. A long, hot shower left her feeling only marginally better. She needed pain reliever, and she needed it two hours ago.