Boo sat next to Mug. ‘I wonder when the driver’s coming,’ he said, just as Yesterday slipped into the seat in front and the bus door slammed shut.
Suddenly the bus windows turned a steely grey.
‘I don’t think this bus has a driver,’ said Yesterday softly. ‘I think it’s just going to …’ a shiver ran through the bus, ‘… drive,’ finished Yesterday as a sudden acceleration forced them back in their seats. The whole bus vibrated.
We must be heading through the wormhole, thought Boo. He had never imagined speed like this. It was as though he’d left his stomach and half his brain behind.
Suddenly the shivering stopped. The bus stopped too.
Boo stared out of the windows. They were clear glass again now, but all he could see was the sides of the wormhole. Where was the World of Golden Grass?
But, of course, he realised. Wormholes come out under beds … and the bus wouldn’t fit under a bed. Not any bed he’d known. The World of Golden Grass must be above them.
Princess Princess leapt out first, flexing her muscles and looking around eagerly. The others followed her … and suddenly the four of them were moving upwards. Boo ducked his head just before it hit the underside of a bed.
Or was it a bed? It was just a pile of hay, he realised, resting on a wooden platform raised on four poles. And the hay was in a tall, tepee-like tent. Its red and blue sides billowed slightly in the wind. Through the doorway he could see grassy gold hills rolling into the distance and puffy white clouds in a blue sky. The sun looked like a big fat cheese, almost the same colour as the grass.
So this was the World of Golden Grass.
It’s … pretty, thought Boo, as he followed Princess Princess outside. That was the perfect word for it. Pretty tents, all gathered in a circle around a big fireplace. A pretty garden, just beyond the tents, filled with pretty red flowers.
What did the Greedle want on a world like this?
He frowned. There was something … odd … about those flowers. They didn’t smell like any flowers he knew. If only he was in wolf shape and could smell properly! He sniffed again.
Princess Princess looked at him crossly. ‘Stop sniffing! You can at least try to act like a Hero. Hey, everyone, what do you call a flea that lives in a dumb wolf’s ear?’
No one answered.
‘A space invader!’
‘The flowers smell funny,’ said Boo.
‘They’re not flowers,’ said Yesterday grimly. She was wearing the same brown leather tunic she wore every day. He could tell by the pattern of the darns.
‘What are they, then?’ he asked.
‘Bloodstained skulls.’
‘How can you tell from this distance?’ demanded Princess Princess .
‘I’ve seen bloodstained skulls before.’
‘Where?’
Yesterday shrugged. ‘Come on,’ she said, without answering the question. ‘We’d better find these Rabbits.’
Mug stared around the circle of tents. ‘Where all the peoples?’ he rumbled.
‘Hiding from the Rabbits,’ said Yesterday shortly.
‘How do you know?’ demanded Princess Princess.
Yesterday said nothing. There was a strange expression on her face. As Boo looked, she shut her eyes and concentrated.
Princess Princess stared at her impatiently. ‘What are you doing?’
Yesterday kept her eyes shut. ‘Finding the Rabbits.’
‘Like that? But you’re not a Finder! Only Finders can Find things like that! We haven’t even had any Finding lessons yet.’
‘That’s how I passed the entrance test to the school,’ said Yesterday shortly. ‘I Found something.’
‘What?’ demanded Princess Princess.
Yesterday said nothing. Her eyes stayed shut.
‘You’re just trying to make yourself important,’ said Princess Princess uncertainly. ‘You can’t actually Find. Real Finders are extremely rare and …’
‘I … I have Found something.’ Yesterday opened her eyes. She sounded puzzled. ‘But it’s not a Rabbit! It’s long and brown and … and wriggling …’
‘That just my lunch,’ rumbled Mug. ‘It a sausage.’
‘But it’s moving!’
‘It a zombie sausage. Mum was out of zombie spaghetti this morning.’
‘Oh. I see.’
‘Ha! I said you couldn’t Find anything,’ began Princess Princess, as Yesterday closed her eyes again.
‘Shhh,’ said Boo, surprising himself with his boldness. ‘Let her try.’
‘And let the Rabbits get away while we just stand here? I say we spread out and each climb a hill. Then we can see …’
‘I’ve got them!’ Yesterday opened her eyes. ‘They’re over that way.’ She pointed. ‘About three hills away. They’re dozing after feeding last night. But there’s a problem.’
Yes, thought Boo. We’re on a strange world with ferocious bunnies and I’m so scared I want to widdle but I can’t because I’ve got pants on and no toilet. But all he said was, ‘What?’
‘There are more than three of them,’ said Yesterday flatly. ‘I’m pretty sure that there are at least twenty.’
‘That more than three?’ rumbled Mug.
Yesterday nodded. ‘And there’s another thing.’
‘What?’ squeaked Boo.
‘They’re not ordinary Rabbits. They’re Giant ones.’
Princess Princess stared. ‘That’s impossible! Miss Cassandra said there were only three ordinary Rabbits! The school wouldn’t make a mistake like that! Send Level 1 Heroes out against a whole mob of Giant Rabbits! You’re making this up.’
‘Am I?’ asked Yesterday coolly. ‘You’ll soon find out, won’t you?’ She began to walk in the direction she’d indicated.
‘Stop!’ cried Princess Princess. ‘Look, if you’re right, we have to go back! This … this isn’t just an exercise at school! This is real! The four of us can’t possibly fight a whole mob of Giant Rabbits.’
‘I thought you were supposed to be this great Hero who could fight anything,’ said Yesterday.
‘I can, yes,’ said Princess Princess. ‘But not all by myself! The rest of you are useless! You’re only just average at Wham! Bam! Pow! and you can’t even Zoom! And Mug keeps losing bits of himself and Boo-Boo’s hopeless. Don’t you see?’ Princess Princess’s voice rose hysterically. ‘We have to go back! The school can send out some Level 3s or 4s to deal with the Rabbits.’
Yesterday looked at Boo and Mug. ‘What do you two think?’
Boo tried to decide. Part of him thought that Princess Princess was right. It was silly to try to fight bogeys that outclassed them. But somehow it felt wrong to leave …
‘It’s not that I’m frightened or anything,’ added Princess Princess hastily. ‘It’s just not fair on you three.’
‘Well, I think …’ he began.
‘Help me! Oh, please help me!’ A small sheep-like creature scampered up the hill. Her face was like a normal human’s, except for her silvery skin, and her fleece was pale gold.
Suddenly Boo had a vision of lamb chops, steaming on a golden platter, while the Greedle drooled. So that’s what the Greedle wants from this world, he thought. That’s why you’ve sent your Rabbits here. To get your lamb chops — and have a nice feed themselves while they gather them.
‘It’s my little lamb!’ The sheep woman was sobbing, the tears trickling into her golden wool. ‘My little Darlene! She’s only four years old!’
Yesterday put a thin brown hand on the sheep woman’s woolly shoulder. ‘You think she’s run away?’
The sheep woman nodded, trying to catch her breath. ‘She wanted to find her toy lambie. We all went down to shelter in the jail. It’s reinforced concrete. It’s the only place that’s safe from the Rabbits. But we were in such a hurry Darlene forgot her lambie. You have to save her! You’re Heroes, aren’t you?’ She looked a bit doubtfully at Boo and Mug, then more confidently at Princess.
Princess Princess
punched a punch Pow! with her fist. ‘I am. The others are pretty useless.’
‘Oh.’ The sheep woman glanced at Mug, Boo and Yesterday. Boo had a horrible feeling she agreed with Princess Princess’s assessment. The sheep woman turned back to Princess Princess, her silver face pale and pleading.
‘You’ll rescue her, won’t you?’
‘Well, actually, we have to go back to school —’ began Princess Princess.
‘We’ll rescue your lamb,’ said Yesterday gently. She looked at the others. ‘We all will, won’t we?’
‘Yes,’ said Boo.
‘Yes,’ rumbled Mug.
‘As if I have a choice,’ muttered Princess Princess. She gave the woman a beaming smile. ‘Of course we’ll rescue your daughter! By the way,’ she said casually, ‘I’m Princess Princess Sunbeam Caresse of Pewké. Just in case you want to tell anyone who saved you all.’
The sheep woman bent her front legs in a sort of curtsey. ‘Yes, Your Highness. Thank you, Your Highness … it’s just — you will hurry, won’t you? The Rabbits might have her already.’
‘The Rabbits are asleep,’ said Yesterday quietly. ‘Your little lamb is all right for the moment. Come on,’ she said to the others. ‘We need to hurry.’
Boo stared at the sheep woman as she ran back down the golden grassy hill. She looked so ordinary, in spite of her golden wool. Not anyone special.
It’s funny, he thought. I fought the Greedle to save the people I knew, but now I’m going to fight to save someone I’ve never even met.
It felt like the rightest thing he’d ever done.
So this is what it’s like to be a Hero, Boo thought. Then he ran to keep up with Yesterday and the others as they headed across the golden grass.
21
The Attack of the Zombie Sausage
The tent village was behind them now, though Boo could still smell it faintly, even in human form, a smell of painted leather and death. The golden grass smelt dusty. There was another scent as well, a sweet, almost musky one that Boo had never smelt before. He supposed it was the scent of Rabbit.
In front of them a small stream sparkled between the rounded hills.
‘Where are the Rabbits?’ whispered Princess Princess. Her face was white. Maybe the sun’s too hot for her, thought Boo. It was so lucky for them that she was with them. At least Yesterday and Mug had a chance with Princess Princess around.
Yesterday shut her eyes briefly. ‘Still two hills over. Still asleep.’
Princess Princess bit her lip. ‘Are you sure you can do this Finding stuff?’
‘Yes,’ said Yesterday quietly.
‘Can you Find the little lamb?’
‘She’s playing with her toy lambie over there.’ Yesterday nodded towards a small stone bridge further down the stream. ‘She’s safe for the moment.’
‘Until the Rabbits come this way,’ said Boo softly.
‘Until they come this way,’ agreed Yesterday.
‘R—right.’ Princess Princess’s voice sounded strangely squeaky. She gulped and tried again. ‘Right! We have to have a plan! Listen carefully. We creep up on the Rabbits and circle round them. Yesterday goes in front and Boo-Boo to the right and Mug to the left …’
‘No worries,’ rumbled Mug. He frowned. ‘Which way left?’
‘We’ll show you!’ yelled Princess Princess. She forced her voice back to a whisper. ‘And … and I’ll stay on this side of them. Then when I give the signal we all attack in turn. I’ll Zoom! them until they’re confused, then Yesterday and Mug go in with Wham! Bam! Pow! Boo-Boo, you just keep the Rabbits herded together — and try not to get in the way.’
‘Me want to try secret weapon first,’ rumbled Mug.
‘What secret weapon?’ demanded Princess Princess shortly.
Mug burped, sending a strong scent of fungus across the golden grass. ‘It secret!’
‘Oh, great,’ muttered Princess Princess. ‘A zombie secret weapon. I suppose you’re going to throw your big toe at them or something. Okay, try your secret weapon. Then I’ll give the signal.’
‘You’re a better Wham! Bam! Pow!er than any of us,’ said Boo doubtfully.
‘I can’t do everything!’ cried Princess Princess shrilly. ‘It’s just not fair, sending me out with three hopeless …’ She took a deep breath. ‘Come on. Let’s get this over with.’
They strode through the thick gold grass. Boo supposed the sheep people ate it, although it would need millions of sheep people to munch all this.
‘Over that hill, I think,’ whispered Yesterday.
Princess Princess nodded. ‘You go that way,’ she muttered to Mug. ‘Yes, that’s left, you idiot zombie. Boo-Boo, you run over there. Yesterday, circle round with Mug then go on ahead of him. I’ll climb the hill here. Don’t do anything till I give the signal.’
They nodded. Boo began to circle the hill. If only I wasn’t so clumsy as a human, he thought. It was so slow on two feet, and his jaws could hardly grab anything at all. And his hands were trembling and his skin felt all prickly with terror.
Some Hero, he told himself. How unfair is it that my friends are stuck with me?
And suddenly the Rabbits were there, lying with their paws on their noses on the grass. They were strange-looking creatures, with long velvet ears, pink noses and brownish white fur. They looked peaceful, dozing in the sun — till you noticed the long feet for clubbing their enemies, the deadly claws and the razor-sharp whiskers.
Boo wondered where Mug and Yesterday and Princess Princess were. All at once he glimpsed Yesterday, a silent shadow across the far hill. And there was Mug, stomping across the hill opposite.
Boo bit his lip. There was no way Mug could ever be stealthy. The Rabbits were going to notice them any second. Even as he looked one of the Rabbits peered up at Mug. It snarled. Suddenly the whole horde was awake, their fangs flashing in the sunlight.
Where’s Princess Princess? Boo thought desperately. Princess Princess had to start Zoom!ing now! The Rabbits would charge Mug any second! There was no way the zombie could protect himself from a horde of charging Giant Rabbits! They had to act!
But it was too late. Almost as one Rabbit, the horde began to hop towards Mug, slowly at first, then faster —
It was as though the world changed. Or have I Changed? thought Boo wonderingly. But when he glanced down he was still a boy. But the trembling had gone. The terror was still there, only now it seemed like a stone he could use to sharpen all his senses.
His whole life narrowed into a single purpose. To attack. He had to save his friend! Boo began to run …
And then he stopped. What was happening? The Rabbits had all stopped too. As Boo watched, one of them suddenly fell over and lay still. And then another and another …
‘Me use secret weapon!’ Mug yelled happily at Boo.
‘But what is it?’ cried Boo.
‘Zombie sausage. See? It knocking them all out.’
Boo stared. Now he knew what to look for he could see it, a long, round sausage glistening with fat and maybe a bit of tomato sauce (at least he hoped it was tomato sauce), bouncing from Rabbit skull to Rabbit skull. And every time Mug’s lunch bounced another bunny fell down.
Boo felt laughter well up inside him. A zombie sausage! Who needed Heroes when you had a zombie sausage? A whole mob of Giant Rabbits defeated by a secret zombie sausage! ‘Look at it go!’ he yelled.
The sausage was leaping madly now. Up, up, up it flew, then down, down, down …
‘No!’ barked Boo.
… into the mouth of the largest, fiercest-looking Rabbit of all. The Rabbit had swallowed Mug’s secret weapon! The Rabbit grinned evilly, then looked puzzled. A second later it dropped to the ground.
Deadly indigestion, thought Boo. He gulped. The sausage had disposed of about half of the bunnies. But half a horde was still too many.
He looked around wildly. ‘Princess!’ he yelled. ‘Where are you? Come on! It’s time to Zoom! We have to attack the rest of the Rabbits
!’
‘It’s … it’s … it’s …’ came the echo. But Princess didn’t reply.
What’s happened to her? wondered Boo desperately. Had a stray Rabbit attacked her? But there was no time to hunt for her now. ‘Mug! Have you got another sausage?’ he yelled.
‘Mum only packed one for lunch,’ rumbled Mug.
‘Er, anything else? A ferocious zombie apple? A deadly zombie tomato?’
‘Only sausage today,’ rumbled Mug. ‘Wish me had zombie spaghetti too,’ he added. ‘Me hungry.’
‘Oh,’ said Boo. He tried to think. But it was hard to think with a mob of killer Rabbits peering at you.
They were working out who to attack next. Boo had a sudden horrible vision of what a mob of maddened Rabbits might do to Mug. Or Yesterday’s skull piled up with the others by the tents.
Suddenly the Rabbits began to break up into groups. Five of them hopped towards Yesterday, another five hopped after Mug, and a third group bounded towards Boo.
There’s no way we can fight five Rabbits each, decided Boo, forcing his brain into overdrive. Their only chance had been with the four of them fighting together.
He had to plan! Fast! But all his training had fled. He had never felt right in his human body, and he felt even less right now.
Would it really make a difference if he were in werewolf form? Maybe not, said the human part of Boo’s brain. Maybe the Rabbits would just think ‘Cute little dog! Yum yum!’ But his wolf mind was yelling CHANGE!
No time to concentrate. Just time to turn his back to Yesterday, tear off his clothes (he wasn’t going to get tangled in his underpants this time) and …
PLUNG!
He was a werewolf again. The world was taller, its colours duller, its scents and sounds immeasurably more vivid.
Part of his mind said the Change made him no better off at all. But the other part howled with joy. This felt good. This felt right!
All of which happened in perhaps two seconds …
Mug still slouched there, lost without his sausage. Yesterday stood her ground, her hands raised in the familiar Wham! Bam! Pow! opening defence position. She shot him a small smile. It wasn’t a ‘hey look at the fluffy puppy’ smile. It was a smile of friendship and trust. It was the first time he had ever seen Yesterday smile. She looked … different, he decided.
Lessons for a Werewolf Warrior Page 12
