My Fake Wedding (Red Dress Ink (Numbered Paperback))
Page 35
George pops in to see them all the time. He’s a doting godfather. He’s given up work now, and he and David are travelling around a lot at the moment, because they’re hoping to buy themselves a Third World baby. So far, I don’t think they’ve managed to get one to match the upholstery of their new car, but I’m sure they’ll find something suitable soon.
Jasper’s name turned out not to be Jasper at all. His real name is Archie Higgs and he’s been wanted by police for questioning over an illegal porn ring operating in the Hampshire area for some time. I saw it in the News of the Screws.
Poppy had twins Molly and Holly in September. Being Poppy, she had a perfect, painless birth. Not like Janice’s, which left the delivery room looking not unlike an abbatoir and her perineum in tatters. And, being Poppy’s, the twins are perfectly behaved. They only cry in extreme circumstances and are hardly ever ill. The only time Poppy saw Janice’s baby, Lucille barfed up all over her, to Janice’s and my huge amusement.
I don’t know what happened to Max, because, thankfully, I never saw him again.
Nick and Mum bonded over the stew and he pops round to her and Jeff ‘s for supper every now and again.
Jake and Fishpants got married not long ago. The bridegroom wore Hugo Boss and the bride’s knickers were showing.
Pussy’s wedding to a minor royal was splashed all over Hello! the other week.
And I finally got to have a shag on my wedding night after all.
And, yes, the novelty draught-excluder was definitely not a disappointment.
My mother is in seventh heaven now that Sam and I have got it together. She keeps hinting about wedding bells and it’s becoming difficult to keep my looming decree absolute from her.
But I don’t think Sam and I will get married.
I mean, you can’t exactly have a wedding where the bride and groom’s parents are one and the same?
Can you?
MY FAKE WEDDING
A Red Dress Ink novel
ISBN: 978-1-4603-1176-9
© 2003 by Mina Ford.
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