Ghost of a Chance

by Kris T. Bethke

  “Whose turn is it?” Blake finished his coffee and reached to put the mug on the end table. The motion made him wince. His body was still not fully healed. He tried to hide it, but Derek saw.

  “You okay?”

  “Absolutely,” Blake said with complete honesty. “I’ll be sore for a bit yet. This is how it works with me. But if we had to go on a job tomorrow, I’d be fine.”

  Derek studied him for a moment and moved the cookie plate to the coffee table along with his own mug. “Here. Put your feet in my lap.”

  Blake gave him a wary look, but slowly did as instructed. Derek removed his socks, and then went to work with his big hands, massaging and flexing his feet. Blake instantly melted, and a low groan escaped.

  “Oh my God, that feels good.”

  Derek let out a warm chuckle. “There are pressure points in your feet that can be used to relax your muscles. I studied massage therapy.”

  “Right there.” Blake shuddered at the amazing sensations. “Why?”

  Derek shrugged one shoulder and kept working. “It made sense to me to learn. What you do is physically demanding, even if people don’t realize it. And you heal better when you aren’t all tense and sore. I thought it would be good to know how to ease that.”

  “How are you real?”

  “You keep asking that.” Derek fixed him with a look even though his hands didn’t stop. “I’m obviously real. Didn’t your last anchor take care of you?”

  “Of course she did!” Blake said with indignation. Who the hell was this guy to question Katy? “Katy was amazing and took care of me for twelve years. We have a great relationship, and I never wanted for anything. I was always safe in her hands. She knew exactly what I needed.”

  “I meant no offense. Really. That was thoughtless of me.” Derek’s tone was low and soothing, and Blake responded to it, even though he didn’t want to. It didn’t hurt that Derek kept massaging. He hit a particularly good spot, and Blake’s body involuntarily relaxed.

  “Don’t say stuff like that. Okay? Your way of taking care of me might be different, but that doesn’t mean her way was bad.”

  Derek nodded. “You’re right. And I apologize.”

  “Thanks. Now, whose turn is it?” Blake needed to focus back on the game. He believed that Derek hadn’t meant anything by his comment, and hopefully he wouldn’t say anything like that again. He was still overly sensitive about Katy’s retirement. He missed her.

  “It’s yours,” Derek reminded him gently.

  “Right. Okay, then.” Blake squinted one eye and tried to think of something clever. “Shower or bath?”

  Derek burst out with laughter so hard the entire couch shook. “Can you imagine me in a bathtub? Shower.”

  “But what if you had someone in the bath with you?” Blake couldn’t resist asking.

  The laughter tapered off, and Blake thought maybe he saw Derek’s gaze darken. It was surely a trick of the light or something, but it was nice to imagine. For a moment.

  “Well, then. That’s something else entirely, isn’t it?”

  The man’s voice sounded like sex. Blake fought a shiver, and his voice was a little gravelly when he said, “Your turn.”

  Derek nudged the ball of his foot. “You didn’t answer.”

  “Same as you.” Derek could take that statement however he wanted. Blake wasn’t going to elaborate. A slow smile spread over Derek’s lips, and in another situation, Blake might have thought of it as wicked.

  “I think you’d fit just fine in a tub.”

  Blake almost choked on air. It was suddenly all too much—his feet in Derek’s lap, those big hands working magic, the grin, and the tone. They couldn’t do anything, and though Blake’s thoughts took everything to another level, it was one he shouldn’t go to.

  He sat up fast, extricated his feet from Derek’s hold, and pulled them up and underneath himself. He had to step it back. Partners on the job? Close friends? Either was fine. But anything more intimate wasn’t possible.

  “You okay?”

  Blake nodded, though he couldn’t bring himself to look directly into Derek’s warm, dark eyes. Instead he focused somewhere over his left shoulder. Close enough, he hoped.

  “Yep. I’m just getting tired again. Thanks for the foot rub. It felt amazing and was just what I needed.”

  “Good.” Derek straightened up a bit too and adjusted his own position so he caught Blake’s gaze. Dammit. He had to calm himself down, focus on the important stuff, and not let anything else come between them.

  “So now you know how I react. And the afterwards. It’s usually varying degrees of this. If I’m gone for longer, then it usually takes me longer to recover, which I guess makes sense.” And apparently he felt the need to babble. He took a deep breath and got himself under control. “At any rate I’m gonna be a hot, crying mess when I come back. Queasy and sleepy and sore afterward. By morning I should be fine.”

  Derek nodded. “Your vitals evened out pretty quickly. Assuming you’re normal.” A small smirk accompanied the last, and Blake’s heart gave a thump. Stupid heart.

  “Yeah. I’ll forward you my medical sheet so you can see and keep track.”

  “Thanks. So I guess we’re done playing the game then?”

  Why did Derek have to point it out? Katy always let things slide when he was obviously changing the subject. Blake chanced a glance at him and saw the gentle smile. Damn that too. God, he was good-looking.

  “Yeah. I just can’t focus right now.” Not a lie. “Maybe I’ll just go to bed.”

  Derek studied him for a long moment. “It’s early yet. Why don’t we just turn on a movie or something? You can relax and zone out. Maybe have a few more cookies. And then when you actually get to bed, you’ll sleep well.”

  The concern was really nice. Blake could get used to it, and he figured it was a good thing that he could rely on it.

  “Okay. That sounds great.” Blake settled back into the cushions and let Derek choose some mindless TV.

  Definitely a good thing because Blake was already slightly addicted to it.

  Chapter Eight

  IT took a few minutes for the disorientation to pass when he woke, but Blake remembered where he was and why he was there. He didn’t move for long minutes, enjoying the comfortable bed and letting his mind wander. Everything about the situation was messed up. Okay, that wasn’t entirely true. It wasn’t what he expected when he got to work the morning before, but it wasn’t exactly messed up.

  It was just different—very different.

  Blake blew out a breath and slowly got up. His muscles barely protested, and he glanced down at his chest to see the evidence of his wound had completely vanished. Good. That was exactly as it should be. A few ibuprofen and a hot shower, and he’d be good as new.

  He gathered up a set of comfortable clothes and his toiletry bag and headed for the door, but he paused before he opened it. He’d left it cracked the night before as a courtesy, and he listened hard to see if Derek was up yet.

  There were no telltale sounds.

  Blake slinked out of his room without looking around and made a beeline for the open bathroom door. He didn’t know why he was being furtive. It was very early, and Derek probably wasn’t even awake. He chastised himself for being ridiculous and went about his morning ritual.

  Thirty minutes later he emerged in a cloud of steam, showered and dressed. He felt immeasurably better. Normal even. He just needed that first cup of coffee, and he’d be all set.

  Ambling across the room, Blake didn’t even realize what it was that caught his attention from the corner of his eye. He paused on the threshold of the kitchen and backed up several steps into the living room. Derek sat cross-legged on the floor in front of the windows, his back straight, eyes closed, and his palms resting gently on his knees. His bare torso was completely on display.

  Blake stared, transfixed. All that dark skin, the light smattering of hair between his nipples, his posture straight but relaxe
d. The sight made his mouth water. Dammit. Why did his new partner have to be so breathtakingly beautiful? Derek was exactly the kind of man who would catch Blake’s interest—not only in looks, but in personality too. Everything about Derek turned him on.

  He needed to check that, and fast. Fraternization between pairs was not forbidden, but it was certainly frowned upon. Friendships were encouraged, but a deeper connection wasn’t a good idea. If things went wrong, a pair couldn’t work together effectively. But transfers weren’t easy to come by. It was easier for everyone involved if it just never started.

  Blake must have made a noise because suddenly Derek’s eyes popped open, and he fixed Blake with that dark, knowing stare. Blake froze, caught in Derek’s gaze.

  “Good morning,” Derek rumbled without moving from his position. He graced Blake with his warm smile.

  “Morning,” Blake murmured back, melting a little. He cleared his throat. “I’m going to make coffee. Want me to put on the kettle for your tea?”

  “That would be great. Thank you.”

  Blake nodded but couldn’t seem to move. He was transfixed by the way Derek’s chest and shoulders moved as he breathed deeply. “I could, uh. I can make breakfast. I can do this sort of layered breakfast lasagna thing with eggs and bacon and—”

  Derek’s noise of disgust cut him off, and Blake would have been offended if Derek’s rich laugher hadn’t followed it. “That doesn’t sound that appealing, I’m sorry to say. Besides, I already have waffle batter mixed and resting on the counter. I’ll cook in a few minutes.”

  Derek closed his eyes again, and Blake asked in a quiet voice, “What are you doing?”

  “Meditating. It helps keep me centered and steady all day.” Derek cracked open one eye. “Care to join me?”

  Meditation wasn’t exactly Blake’s thing. While Requiem encouraged it for all their employees for the reasons Derek mentioned, Blake had never had any luck with it. He couldn’t get his mind empty enough or something. His mind just wandered until he spent the entire time fidgeting.

  Derek opened his eyes, and his gaze bore into Blake. “You don’t have to. Don’t feel like you do. It’s just something that helps me.”

  Blake nodded and walked forward. He could try it again in the name of fostering a friendship between them. And if it didn’t work, if he still wasn’t any good at it, he could leave Derek to it and go have his coffee while he waited for Derek to be done.

  Derek’s smile was luminous as he tracked Blake’s progress across the room. Blake tried not to feel self-conscious as he seated himself and took a moment to mimic Derek’s pose, but that was easier when Derek stopped staring at him and closed his eyes again.

  “Close your eyes. Just take a few deep breaths and let them out slowly.” Derek’s rumble of a voice washed over him, and Blake obeyed without thought. “Now just empty your mind. Focus on nothing. Blank space. Sink into yourself and center.”

  Easy for Derek to say. Even though Blake did exactly as Derek instructed, all he could think about was the man sitting beside him. The situation they were in. The long months and years ahead of them as they worked the job, got to know one another, and helped people. And the more he thought about the job, the busier his mind got. He knew all the things that could go wrong. Derek was new to the whole thing, no matter all the training he’d had. What if Derek realized that, gene or not, he didn’t want to do it for the long haul? Then Blake would be left without a partner again and wondering if something he did had made Derek leave.

  “I can feel your tension from here.” Derek’s voice was laced with a hint of amusement.

  Blake blew out a breath and let out a small self-deprecating laugh. “Sorry. I’m crap at this.” He stood and brushed off the seat of his jeans. “I’ll just leave you to it.”

  “Wait.” Derek reached up and snagged Blake’s wrist. “Let’s try something else.”

  Derek tugged gently, and Blake let Derek guide him back down. But instead of urging Blake to sit beside him again, he steered Blake to the spot between his now uncrossed legs. Surprised, Blake sat and let Derek surround him with his big body.

  Derek placed a hand on Blake’s stomach and made sure his back was pressed up against Derek’s front.

  “This is kind of, uh… intimate, don’t you think?” Blake whispered. He didn’t know what was going on.

  “Yes.” Derek’s voice was almost as quiet. “Which isn’t a bad thing. I expect we’ll often be in each other’s personal space. Good to get used to it now.”

  “I guess.”

  Derek let out a laugh that vibrated Blake’s body. Blake shivered.

  “Feel me breathe?” Derek asked, seemingly oblivious to the way Blake reacted to him. “Breathe with me. Relax your shoulders. Just breathe deep. Make my hand move.”

  And Blake did. For long minutes all he did was sit and breathe, painfully aware of every point of contact between them. He could feel Derek’s heat, his strong chest, his muscled thighs along his own. He could smell Derek. He had an earthy, wild smell that had to be a combination of body wash and Derek’s natural scent. Blake’s body reacted in the predictable ways, but he tamped it down and focused on inhaling and exhaling right along with Derek.

  “That’s so good,” Derek murmured right in his ear. Pleasure tightened in Blake’s gut, and he wanted Derek’s hand to move lower.

  “We, uh….” Blake cleared his throat. “We have to keep it professional.”

  “I know.” Derek’s voice was tinged with disappointment. Blake wasn’t imagining that.

  After another minute or so, Derek slowly released his hold on Blake, and Blake was reluctant to move out of the warm embrace and actually leaned back a little. But then he felt Derek’s hardness right at the small of his back, and he pulled away. All he wanted to do was push back and really feel Derek exactly where he wanted him, but they couldn’t do that.

  Right?

  “I’m going to get my coffee.” Blake stood, and his knees wobbled. “Thank you for this.”

  Derek smiled. “You bet. I’ll be there in just a minute, and then I’ll cook.”

  Blake headed into the kitchen and straight for the coffee maker. He had to get himself under control. While it was nice to know that Derek was just as affected as he was, they couldn’t do anything about it.

  Friends only.

  The disappointment was acute.

  Chapter Nine

  “HEY, B? How spicy do you like the carne asada?”

  Blake sat up fast, and his head appeared over the back of the couch. He’d been lying down, reading a book while Derek puttered in the kitchen. He peered at Derek with a skeptical look on his face.

  “You’re making….” Blake shook his head. “Is there anything you can’t do?”

  Derek chuckled, pleased down to his core that he’d impressed Blake yet again. Derek was showing off, and he liked that Blake noticed. He’d always taken care of people, but very few of those people had actually appreciated his gestures. In fact there were quite a few who had just taken it for granted. Blake seemed more than appreciative now that they’d gotten past their initial stumbling blocks.

  And Derek really liked watching the man enjoy food.

  He shrugged. “You mentioned you liked Mexican, so I dug around in the cupboards, and this is what I could make.”

  Blake stared wide-eyed for a long moment and then squinted. “I mentioned I liked Mexican once. In passing. In the middle of a very long, very involved story about my brother’s ill-advised tattoo.”

  “I pay attention.” Derek winked.

  With a smile playing at the edges of his mouth, Blake shook his head. “And we just happened to have steak in the cupboards, hmm?”

  Derek shrugged. “Well. I might have asked the kitchen to send some up. I had all the rest. They keep this place pretty well stocked. And I thought, since it’s our last night holed up away from the world together, I’d make something nice. The rice is the instant kind, though. Sorry.”

  “Don
’t worry about the rice.” Blake pulled himself up so he was kneeling on the seat. He propped his elbows up on the back and rested his chin in his hands. “Do you need any help?”

  Derek loved that he offered, and he could tell Blake was more than willing to help, but he was just about done. “I got this. All I need is for you to tell me how you want it. On a scale of ‘what spice?’ to ‘oh my God I just burned all my taste buds and I’ll never be the same again.’”

  Blake threw his head back and laughed. The sound went straight to Derek’s gut, and that pleasant feeling grew. He loved that he’d gotten such a positive reaction from Blake. They were enjoying each other’s company. It was a win.

  “Medium.” Blake pressed a hand to his chest as he regained his breath. “Just enough to give it a little kick, to be able to really taste it.”

  “You got it.” Derek gave him a salute. Then he felt ridiculous and laughed at himself. He added chipotle and chili powder to his marinade and whisked the whole thing until it was well combined. He poured it into a plastic bag with the flank steak, sealed it, and set it on the bottom shelf of the fridge.

  When he turned, Blake was leaning against the counter. His arms were crossed over his chest and so were his legs at the ankles. He cocked his head to the side, and he looked curious, not defensive. Rather than ask Blake what was on his mind, Derek mimicked his pose against the fridge.

  “Sweet or salty?” Blake’s voice was low—bordering on sultry—and Derek was suddenly glad his jeans were just tight enough to keep his body’s reaction from being too obvious.

  “Depends on my mood. But if I had to choose? Salty.”

  Blake’s blue eyes darkened to midnight. “Yeah. Me too.”

  Derek knew damn well he didn’t miss the innuendo there. Not when Blake’s gaze dropped blatantly to his pants. It was a definite change from two days earlier, when Blake was reminding Derek they had to keep things professional. Before he could decide how to respond, Blake licked his lips and focused his gaze back on Derek’s.