Loving Mr. Kale
Page 12
But I wasn’t about to be so lucky. The stranger grabbed my shoulder and spun me around to face him, regardless of what I wanted. I felt like it was totally obvious that I had nothing to say to him, but he didn’t get that hint.
“You know that he doesn’t love you, right?”
Okay, this was getting weird, I didn’t like it one bit.
“Erm, right okay yeah. I don’t think… that isn’t any of your business.”
Of course Bryant didn’t love me, we’d only just met, but that had absolutely nothing to do with this guy. And where the hell did he get off being such a dick about it?
“Of course it is,” he laughed nastily, clapping his hand onto his forehead as if something monumental had just occurred to him.
“Unless, you don’t know who I am.”
I folded my arms across my chest, trying to make my mood clear by my body language. “Right okay, so who are you?” I would give him one more second of my time, then I was gone. This was a real waste of valuable Bryant time, and I really wasn’t willing to give any more of it up.
"I’m Tony.”
As those words left his lips, I unfortunately made it totally obvious that I knew how huge that statement was. My arms fell down, and my feet staggered backward. I started to gasp out in shock.
This was Tony… the Tony that Bryant’s mom just told me about; the Tony that Bryant loved… the man who broke his heart. This was the one that had gotten away…
He was here. That changed everything.
I stared up at this man with a newfound sense of knowledge in my brain. If Tony was here, and Bryant hadn’t warned me, then that had to mean something bad.
Really bad.
I sort of recognized this man too. I felt like he was possibly at the drinks the previous night, which made it even worse. We discussed that relationship then. He could’ve told me the truth. The opportunity was there, but he didn’t.
He’d decided to keep that vital piece of information to himself, despite the fact that I’d been totally honest with him, which cut me deep. I felt that my heart had been slashed, and that emotions were seeping painfully out of it.
“So I can see that you know who I am,” Tony stepped closer to me, getting right up in my personal space, trying his best to intimidate me.
It didn’t work though. I was too upset to be scared.
“And you know what that means, am I right?”
I wasn’t about to give him the satisfaction of answering him, so I bit down hard on my lip to keep me silent.
“You know that I was the love of Bryant’s life, and you know that I broke his heart when I got with Desi…”
Desi… that name rang a bell too. Was all of Bryant’s past here? Did that make me some sort of weird pawn in some game?
What the fuck was going on?
“And that he never got over me? He still loves me, even now. Ask anyone and they’ll tell you. He has spent the last few months sobbing over what he has lost. He brought you here only to make me jealous. You mean nothing to him.”
My heart fell into my shoes as a horrifying realization hit me.
He was right.
I had to have been brought here as a toy. That was why he wanted someone other than Hayley to come along with him to the wedding.
I knew that it didn’t make any sense. I recognized that right away! Yet still, I’d allowed myself to be fooled. I felt betrayed by Bryant, but also by my friend. Hayley should’ve told me what the plan was. I still might have agreed to it! That was such a terrible, heart-wrenching mistake on her behalf. Even if she didn’t know how well me and Bryant would hit it off, it was unfair of her to send me along to this idiotic game without any warning. I thought she was my friend. Clearly, I was wrong.
I wasn’t sure if I could ever trust her again.
“So I think it might be best if you just leave,” Tony still wasn’t giving it up, however much he could see that he was getting to me. He wasn’t even giving me a minute to digest this information. He was sending my mind spinning, and hammering that final nail in my coffin. “You’re just embarrassing yourself by being here, don’t you think?”
“Fuck you,” I spat out, but the tears in my eyes took a lot away from that statement.
“I’m not going anywhere.” I had to speak to Bryant before I made any kind of decision.
“You should, unless you want to witness us getting back together.”
Well that just about finished me off, didn’t it? If Tony wanted Bryant back, and he was still in love with him, then I’d be forgotten in a second.
I needed to leave while I still had my dignity intact.
There was no way that I could watch the guy I was falling for getting back with his ex, not when I’d finally been feeling happy. Why didn’t I instantly know this was all too good to be true?
I glared at Tony one last time, before shoving the door open and leaving.
Tony could be satisfied. Tony could get what he wanted, but it had absolutely nothing to do with me anymore.
I felt like I was possibly about to experience my first ever true heartbreak, and that really sucked. This had gone from the happiest weekend of my life, to the absolute worst. Misery was back, and this time it threatened to consume me entirely.
Chapter Fifteen
Bryant
“Okay. You alright now, Sally?” I smiled at my sister as she finally started to calm down. “Feeling much better?”
“Nghnnn…” she was already drifting off into a drunken sleep, which made me chuckle to myself. At least she’d had fun, and her husband would be in soon to sleep too. They’d both gone a little crazy today, but it’d all gone as planned, which was good enough.
“Right, okay, I’ll see you in the morning then.”
I snuck out from the bedroom, closing the door very quietly behind me. I hadn’t wanted to get involved with her alcohol-induced madness, but now I was actually glad that I had. She confessed to me how much she liked me, how much she missed our friendship, and I felt like just maybe it was a step in the right direction for us. Maybe we’d end up close after all… if she ever remembered any of this happening.
I chuckled happily to myself and shoved my hands back into my pockets as I walked back towards the hall where the wedding reception was still being held – no one was about to let the departure of the bride and groom ruin their fun. I hoped that I hadn’t been away too long, leaving Max by himself. I was sure that he’d understand all the same… especially when I told him what had happened. He’d get a kick out of that tale!
But as I walked back through the door, there was something different clinging in the air, and that had my hackles rising. I wasn’t sure what it was, but I instantly felt like something was going on… something that I wouldn’t like. My heart flip-flopped in my chest, and something unwelcome churned in my stomach. My eyes flickered everywhere, expecting to see… well, I wasn’t sure what I was expecting to see, but eventually, I found Max instead, stood up against the bar with his back to me.
The panic stilled as I saw him there; his aura cooled all the terror down. It didn’t matter; whatever was happening would be totally fine if I had him here. Somehow, despite the fact that he hadn’t been in my life very long, he made me feel strong. It was almost like he’d become my rock already. Once I got back to his side, everything will be okay.
I felt like all eyes were on me as I made my way across the room, but I didn’t look at anyone else. The only person I cared about was in my eye line, yet he was the one person who couldn’t seem to sense me. I thought that we had a connection. I could certainly feel him everywhere, but I wasn’t about to let that upset me. It would only take a minute or so before we had things back on track.
“Hey,” I patted Max on the back as soon as I was close enough, and grinned at him.
“Sorry about that, I just had to get Sally to bed. She was getting out of control and I didn’t want her to hurl. I expected the bridesmaids to do something, but as I’m sure you’ve already
seen…” I trailed off as I spotted intensity to his expression. He really didn’t look happy, and I had the horrible sense that was my fault.
“I’m sorry that I left you for so long, I should’ve messaged you or something…”
“No, it’s fine,” his smile was strained now. The easygoing, breezy atmosphere was gone, and an awkwardness that had never been there before took hold.
I felt my words get stuck in my throat.
I didn’t know what to say anymore. What the hell was happening? Where had the fire gone, where was the spark? Why did it seem like Max had totally shut himself down?
“I got myself a beer.” He jiggled his bottle at me in a way that could seem playful, but that just demonstrated that he hadn’t bothered getting me one.
“Right, okay,” I spoke slowly as I tried to work out what my next move should be.
“I’ll just get one too. Then we can go and dance again, if you like?” I was clutching desperately at straws now, trying to break down the high walls that he had built up around him. “Or we could go and get that fresh air? Maybe go back to our room?”
Max nodded, but he didn’t look convinced. This was the one moment when I felt like I didn’t know him at all, which sucked really badly. Even when I picked him up and we were strangers, it didn’t feel like this. I thought that we had something; I assumed that our connection was strong, but it seemed like I was very wrong.
“Beer, please,” I said glumly to the bartender, letting my mood shine through. Luckily she didn’t bother to ask me what was wrong. She just gave me a bottle to suck from.
As I grasped my drink, I glanced at Max out the corner of my eye, feeling an intense sadness crashing through my veins. How had the best night of my life become so bad? And what the hell could I do about it? Nothing when I had no idea why things had gone wrong!
“Are you okay?” I tried cautiously.
“Has something happened? Do you… maybe want to talk about it?”
He seemed to trust me enough to open up last night, and I hoped this night was going to turn out the same way.
“I think…” he sighed deeply and fixed his eyes on the ground.
“I think it might be best if I just go. This is just… yeah, I need to get the hell out of here.”
“No, please don’t.” I spun around and clasped my hand tightly onto his arm.
“Please don’t leave. We’ve been having such a good night, haven’t we? If you don’t want to be here anymore then we can go back to the hotel room. We don’t even have to talk, or whatever, if you don’t want? We can just go to sleep?”
Maybe things would look better in the morning… I certainly had to hope so.
“No, no,” he shook me off of him, still refusing to meet my eyes.
“I think I just need to get out of here. I need to be alone.”
As he finally brought his eyes up to meet mine, I was completely taken aback by what I saw there. He actually had me silenced with the utter pain behind his gaze. I wasn’t sure why, but I felt like I’d done something to put that there and it cut deeply into my heart. I opened my mouth, desperate to ask him what I’d done, but for some reason, the words didn’t quite make it to my lips.
It was almost as if I didn’t want to know.
“So, thanks for inviting me, I’ll grab my stuff and get a cab.” He waved his hand awkwardly at me, and I found my ice-cold limbs incapable of doing that back. “Bye then.”
Go after him! my brain screamed. Don’t let him go!
But my legs wouldn’t move however much I wanted them to. Maybe, very deep down, it was because I did know, even if I was trying to convince myself otherwise. It was the secret that had been haunting the pit of my soul since this whole weekend began. I knew that I should’ve been honest, and I had many chances to do so, but I hadn’t. I’d been a coward, and it seemed like that decision had finally come back to haunt me.
Chapter Sixteen
Max
As I stepped into the cab, my eyes felt compelled to look back at the building I was leaving behind. The fact that Bryant hadn’t even bothered to come after me as I left proved everything that Tony had told me was the truth.
I really didn’t mean anything to him.
I was nothing more than a pawn, and now that my part in the game was over, I was being discarded like an old wrapper. I’d packed my stuff up slowly, pathetically waiting, sadly hoping that he would turn up and complete the fairy tale by telling me that it was all a lie, but that didn’t happen.
Of course it didn’t. I knew that it wasn’t going to.
I shouldn’t have allowed my hopes to rise up when I knew that they’d get crushed all over again.
My heart physically ached in my chest as the engine rumbled, and the vehicle moved.
It was over.
The dream, the fun weekend, the passion… the potential future… it was all done. I wanted to yell and scream at someone about that, but since the man I needed to shout at was still in there, probably getting back together with his rude, vile ex-boyfriend right at that moment, I had to try someone else.
Ring, ring…
My heart hammered noisily in my chest as I waited for her to speak. Hayley had a lot to answer for, and this felt like the right time to do that. Someone had to feel my wrath – someone who was involved with all of this.
Ring, ring…
Much to my annoyance, angry and frustrated tears filled my eyes, causing me to choke a little bit. I wiped them away, not wanting upset to taint my mood when I let Hayley have it. It wasn’t fair. She was supposed to be my friend, and she should never have done this to me.
Ring, ring…
“Hello?” Hayley sounded so carefree, so innocent, that I almost threw up all over the cab floor. She knew. She was aware, and she still wasn’t willing to tell me. What the fuck did that say about me? How did I not realize that I was being played by everyone?
“Why the fuck didn’t you tell me?” I snarled, anger spitting past my lips.
The hurt was gone now. All I could feel was a red, hot, angry pain.
“Why did you let me go to this fucking wedding without knowing that it was all a game. I was a pawn, I was a tool, and I had to find out like that.”
“It wasn’t like that…”
“Yes, it was, and you knew it. Now I’ve just been through the most humiliating experience of my entire life.” I was on a roll now. Every word that she spoke was bulldozed over by my temper. “I was the last one to know, and I’d already… I was…” No, I couldn’t tell her that I was falling for Bryant. This was embarrassing enough. I needed to try and keep at least some dignity.
“But I…”
Was she crying? No, it didn’t matter. I didn’t give a shit. She deserved to feel the sort of pain that I was right now.
“If you must know, your little scheme worked really well. Bryant and Tony are back together, and yet again I’m left with no one.”
After that, I went silent, and so did she. Hayley had no words to defend herself, but I wanted to give her the chance anyway. Despite the fact that everyone had hurt me, I was still giving them a shot. It was just unfortunate that no one had any way of making themselves look any better. They were all scum of the Earth.
In the end, I didn’t even bother to say goodbye; I simply clicked the phone off instead. Things were about to change in my life, and that was the only thing that I’d get from this weekend.
I needed to be stronger, to be more powerful. I had to make my own happiness. I’d sat back for far too long and allowed misery to come to me, to just fall into my lap, but never again. I wouldn’t ever allow myself to be in the sort of situation where someone could fuck me over. Tonight would be reserved for sadness; tomorrow would be a whole new day.
I stared out of the window, watching the world rush by, the whole time wondering how I’d managed to read Bryant so wrong.
I thought he was sweet and decent. I thought that I had a good judge of character and that he was someone worth k
nowing, but it seemed that I was very wrong. I couldn’t have been more wrong if I tried!
Everything was a lie. Every damn word out of his mouth was untruthful. Even the shared looks, the passion I assumed was there, the night of love making we’d had… it was all utter fucking bullshit.
Sure, he must’ve been a damn good actor to pull all of that off, but he was with Tony now, so clearly he was. How the hell was I supposed to recover from that? I liked Bryant, I really did, and this was a very hard pill to swallow. I’d opened myself up, let someone in, just to end up made a fool out of anyway.
This was the worst thing to ever happen to me.
Chapter Seventeen
Bryant
My limbs were still frozen to the spot what felt like hours later. Maybe in reality, it was only a few moments, but I couldn’t really be sure. All I knew was that the world had ended and I didn’t know what to do. Guilt and horror flooded my system, rendering me speechless, gutless, and all round useless.
“Everything alright?” I recognized his soft tone before I even turned around to look into his eyes. It might have been a very long time since I’d last heard him speak, but the memory of him would always be etched firmly into my brain. This was the man that I’d been desperate to speak to not so long ago. Now that he was doing so, I felt absolutely nothing.
“I just saw your date stomping out of here, so I wanted to check up on you.”
“Erm…” I coughed awkwardly, unsure of what he expected me to say to that one. This was all just so damn strange.
“Erm, yeah everything is alright. How about you and Desi?” Saying that dreadful man’s name used to kill me, but now it was just another word. It rolled off the tongue just as easily as anything else.
“Everything alright there?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” he took Max’s place, pressed up against the bar. I wanted to tell him to leave, but I wasn’t quite sure where the words were.