Love Left Behind

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Love Left Behind Page 39

by S. H. Kolee


  I shook my head, not wanting to talk about our failed relationship. I was done arguing about who was right and who was wrong. All that mattered now was that it was over. "Okay, never mind then."

  We sat in silence again, both jumping when Jackson's apartment phone rang. Jackson got up with a bemused look on his face, hitting a button on the phone instead of picking up the receiver.

  "Mr. Reynard, Claire Ranson is here to see you," said Sam's disembodied voice on the speakerphone.

  I had thought "seeing red" was just an expression, but in that moment, I knew it could literally happen. I shot up from the couch, seeing a haze of red as I glared at Jackson, unable to speak through my rage. Jackson watched me warily as he spoke to Sam.

  "Sam, hold on." Jackson pressed a button before turning back to me, his expression enigmatic. "Do you know what this is about?"

  I finally found my voice, although it was difficult to speak past the lump in my throat. "What the hell do you mean? You're the one that lured me into your apartment! Is this some kind of setup to humiliate me?"

  Jackson shook his head sadly. "Emma, I had no idea I would bump into you at Andrews. And I have no idea what Claire is doing here. Should I send her away?"

  "By all means, invite her up," I replied acidly. "Let's see what the bitch wants."

  Jackson sighed heavily, not moving to take Sam off hold. "I don't want to do anything to hurt you. I can tell Sam not to let her up."

  I laughed, not caring about the note of hysteria I heard in my voice. "It's a little too late for that. It'll be interesting to see you two together. We can have a happy little reunion."

  Jackson watched me for a few moments, and then leaned down to press the button taking Sam off hold. "Send her up." He pressed the button to disconnect the call and walked towards me. Despite my anger, I had to resist the urge to take a step back. I had a feeling that whatever pain I had felt these past couple of months was nothing compared to the pain I was going to feel in a few moments. It was masochistic of me, but now I had a driving need to see them together. To confirm their betrayal with my own eyes.

  "Emma," Jackson urged quietly. "I don't know why Claire is here. After we fought, I texted her and told her that I wasn't going to meet up with her and for her to never contact me again. I swear it."

  I stared at Jackson's earnest expression, calling myself a million kinds of fool for wanting to believe him. I pressed my lips together, not responding, and Jackson just sighed, running his hand through his hair. He grimaced when he heard the knock at the door and stalked towards it. I was out of view in the living room when he opened the door but I could clearly hear their conversation.

  "Claire, what are you doing here?"

  "Jackson, I'm sorry to bother you but I had to talk to you." The sound of Claire's voice set my teeth on edge and my hands curled into fists. Hearing her say Jackson's name made me want to tear her hair out.

  "How did you even know I was in town?"

  "Mia told me. Don't be mad at her. I told her I had something important to say to you, and that I had to say it in person."

  "So say it." I was surprised at how cold Jackson's voice sounded. I had a niggling feeling that he had been telling the truth, that he hadn't seen Claire in years. Their conversation certainly sounded like they hadn't seen each other in a while.

  "Can I come in?" Claire asked hesitantly. There was a heavy pause and I tensed as I heard the door close and footsteps coming closer into the living room. I held my ground, my head held high as I saw Jackson appear with Claire trailing behind him. She looked as gorgeous as ever, her blonde hair shorter now, reaching just below her shoulders. She was wearing grey pants with a slim black belt and a black blouse. With her long black coat and heels, she looked like the matching pair to Jackson's tall good looks showcased in his suit tailored just for his body. It made me feel even sicker.

  Claire's eyes widened comically when she saw me, her step faltering. Jackson continued walking into the living room, standing beside me. I couldn't help feeling satisfaction that he had aligned himself with me, facing Claire.

  Claire opened her mouth, and then shut it again without speaking. Her gaze flitted from me to Jackson, and then back again to me.

  "Surprised?" I asked with derision.

  "I...I didn't expect to see you here," Claire said, sounding strained. She looked back at Jackson. "You should have told me Emma was here."

  "Why would I want to do that? I have nothing to hide." Jackson was watching Claire appraisingly.

  Claire took a step back, looking like a trapped animal. "I can come back."

  "No." Jackson and Claire both looked at me at my emphatic protest. "Why leave now when things are just getting interesting?" I smiled and cocked my head, knowing that my smile looked more like a grimace. My taunting tone seemed to get a rise out of Claire, her eyes narrowing.

  "Don't blame me because you weren't able to keep Jackson's interest." I wanted to slap the self-satisfied smirk off Claire's face, but Jackson's voice stopped me.

  "Don't piss me off, Claire. Just tell me what was so important that you had to weasel my whereabouts from Mia and come over here today."

  Claire took a deep breath, taking a step towards Jackson and clearly dismissing me. "Fine. I've waited long enough to say this, and she's not going to stop me from saying it." Claire paused, clenching her hands into fists, before continuing. "Jackson, I love you. I've always loved you. I've been waiting patiently for you to return my feelings. And I thought you did five years ago, but then you just pushed me away. Just give me a chance, Jackson. I know I can make you happy."

  Jackson frowned as he watched Claire make her confession. "Claire," he said gently, no longer looking at her derisively. "We were just friends. I'm sorry if you wanted more, but it just wasn't going to happen. We weren't right for each other."

  "What the fuck?" Jackson and Claire both turned towards me at my harsh epithet. I was in disbelief over what I was witnessing. "I'm sorry to interrupt your little scene, but I'm not standing here like a moron while you two play out some unrequited love shit in front of me." I grabbed my purse that I had dropped on the couch and stalked towards the hallway leading to the front door, determined to leave this crazy dysfunctional situation behind me. I couldn't stop myself from pausing in front of Claire before I stormed out, feeling hatred ooze out of every pore of my body as I glared at her. I didn't miss the flicker of fear in Claire's eyes as she stared back at me. "I never thanked you for fucking Jackson behind my back. I trusted you, I told you how much I loved Jackson, and all along you were screwing him." I smiled bitterly. "Hopefully one day he can screw around on you, so you know exactly what it feels like."

  I marched past her, intending to leave with my dignity intact, when Jackson's voice stopped me.

  "Don't move." He didn't raise his voice, but his tone told me I would be foolish to disobey. He sounded as if he was trying to control his fury, which made it all the more frightening.

  I felt a hand on my arm and was whipped around. I looked up at Jackson's face mutinously, despite feeling a little afraid by his fierce expression. I glanced at Claire behind him and she looked pale, her eyes glazed in fear. I didn't know why Jackson was so angry, and I was apprehensive about it, but Claire looked like she was terrified.

  Jackson's voice was quiet when he spoke, despite its intensity. "What are you talking about?"

  My apprehension over his anger dissipated in a haze of my own fury. "I don't have time for this. Let me go." I tugged on my arm, but it was useless against Jackson's iron grip. His jaw looked as hard as granite as his eyes narrowed.

  "Indulge me," he barked and I rolled my eyes at his domineering tone. "Repeat what you just said."

  "Why? So I can relive my humiliation? Wasn't cheating on me with Claire throughout our whole relationship humiliation enough? Now you want to talk about it in detail?"

  Jackson's grip on my arm tightened painfully, his eyes burning into me. "Emma, I slept with her once. Once! It was about a w
eek after we broke up. I was rip-roaring drunk, drowning my pain in alcohol, and she just appeared out of nowhere. I had no idea what she was doing in L.A. but she was a friend and I trusted her to take me home. I was in no shape to drive. I don't remember the rest. I just know I woke up the next morning in bed with her, and I knew what we had done even though I didn't remember it. I was sick over it. I felt as if I had betrayed you, even though you had broken up with me."

  I started to tremble at Jackson's words, not wanting to believe him yet wanting to believe him at the same time. It couldn't be true that Jackson hadn't cheated on me. That he had slept with Claire just once when he was drunk out of his mind. It was too painful to believe that we had been separated for years because of a misunderstanding.

  I shook my head, telling myself that it was impossible. I looked at Claire, but I saw the truth written all over her face. She looked paralyzed with fear, rooted to the spot as her web of lies started to unravel.

  "But Claire told me you two were sleeping together the entire time. I called you to tell you I had made a huge mistake. To beg you to take me back. But she answered your phone. She said you two had been sleeping together throughout our relationship and had realized you were in love when I was out of the picture." I paused, my voice shaking. "I didn't believe it and demanded to speak to you. I heard your voice in the background. It was you. I'd know your voice anywhere. She told me you didn't want to speak to me, that everything had already been said." I was shaking, remembering that I hadn't actually understood what Jackson had said because his voice was too far away and faint. I hadn't actually heard him say he didn't want to talk to me.

  Jackson's eyes had closed during my explanation, and when they opened again they were ravaged with pain. "Sweetheart, it must have been the night I was drunk into oblivion. When I made the stupid mistake with Claire. I swear I don't remember your call. If I had known-" His voice broke, his body shuddering with emotion. "If I had known you wanted to talk to me, that you wanted me back...nothing would have stopped me." Jackson's expression suddenly grew enraged and he turned around abruptly, dropping his grip on my arm. He stalked towards Claire, his hands clenched into fists at his side, and she fearfully scrambled back until she hit the wall.

  "Jackson," she squeaked, looking terrified. "I can explain-"

  "You better fucking explain." Jackson's voice was low but thick with fury. He was heaving and I could see he was trying to control himself.

  "I was doing it for you!" Claire cried, her words tripping over each other as she rushed to explain. "Emma was no good for you. We were meant to be together. When we first met, I knew you were the one for me. But you insisted we were better off as friends. I agreed because I wanted to stay close to you. But I knew one day you would realize that we belonged together. That we were soul mates. That's why you never became serious with any girl you dated." Claire's expression darkened and she looked at me spitefully over Jackson's shoulder. Her tone turned from pleading to caustic as her eyes bored into me. "Until Emma came along. Sweet little Emma, with her big brown eyes and innocent act. It made me sick to see you fawning all over her. I had to listen to her moans while you fucked her, knowing it should've been me! She had everything and I had nothing! Even messing up her presentation and getting her fired from her stupid job worked in her favor because she was free to go to L.A. with you. She doesn't deserve you, she's not good enough for you."

  I was stunned by Claire's revelation that she had been the one to sabotage my work, but that paled in comparison to the realization that she had completely fabricated their affair.

  Jackson slammed his fist against the wall next to Claire's head, shocking her attention back to him. "Shut up! You're nothing compared to Emma. I trusted you and you screwed me over. Why the hell did you tell me she married Sean?"

  I didn't think it was possible, but Claire's complexion became even more ashen at Jackson's question. "I...I wanted you to forget her. She rejected you, yet you were still pining away for her. I knew you needed some closure. That's why I told you she married Sean." Claire's voice grew frantic as she continued. "Everything I did, I did for you! I love you, Jackson. Please, just give me a chance."

  "You didn't do anything for me. Everything was for you. What exactly happened the night Emma called?" Jackson's eyes were glittering, his expression dangerous.

  "She wanted to talk to you. I knew I needed to convince her to leave you alone. To let go of you. So I told her we had been having an affair. That we loved each other." Claire grimaced, having the gall to look irritated. "But she wouldn't believe me. She demanded to talk to you. I told you Emma was on the phone, but you were just talking gibberish. So I told her you didn't want to talk to her." Claire finished her sentence with a shrug, not seeming to care that she had ruined two lives with those lies.

  "I was fucking out of my mind!" Jackson yelled, fury etched on every line of his face. "I doubt I was even fully conscious at that point!"

  "Jackson," Claire implored, lifting her hand to touch his face.

  "Get out," Jackson bit out, his voice strained. "Get out, or so help me God, I'm going to do something I regret."

  Claire's hand dropped and she inched against the wall away from Jackson, her eyes wide with fear as she scurried away. She gave me one hateful glare before she left, but she was too petrified to say anything to me. When the door slammed behind her, Jackson and I were left staring at each other. I had watched the exchange between Jackson and Claire with shock, feeling detached from the situation. As if I were a spectator, and Jackson and Claire were back on stage performing a play.

  I tried to process everything that happened but my mind rebelled against the notion that everything I had believed in all these years was a lie. That Jackson had never betrayed me. It was too painful to believe everything had been built on a sick lie from a disturbed individual bent on possessing Jackson.

  "Emma," Jackson whispered as he walked back to me, his eyes full of regret and longing. "I never cheated on you. You were my world. I could never do that to you."

  "I don't know what to say. I spent all these years thinking you had been unfaithful. Now that I know the truth..." I shook my head, unable to continue.

  "Christ." Jackson's voice was full of anguish as he reached up, caressing my cheek softly. "All these years apart. All these fucking years apart and we could've been together. The thought that you called me because you wanted me back, just to have Claire tell you those lies...it's almost too much to bear." Jackson brushed his lips against my forehead and I closed my eyes against the pain piercing through my heart. It seemed so tragic and unfair to have been ripped apart for no reason. Jackson gently brushed his lips against my closed eyelids, his breath light against me as he whispered. "You must have hated me."

  I opened my eyes, gazing at him with uninhibited love. "I could never hate you," I admitted softly. "Even when I thought you had cheated on me, I could never stop loving you. I cursed myself for being so weak, for wanting you when you had clearly rejected me."

  Jackson cradled my head gently between his hands, his green eyes glassy with emotion. "Sweetheart, you're my world. Don't ever believe anything different. I would do anything for you. Be anything for you."

  "All I want is you, Jackson. Everyone else can have the image. I just want the man." I paused, my expression darkening. "I'm sorry for believing Claire all those years ago. Hearing your voice in the background...it made me believe that it was true. I should have known you would never do anything like that to me. I should've tried calling you again but I was too hurt."

  "Shh, sweetheart," soothed Jackson as he wiped away the tears I hadn't realized were making their way down my face. "It's not your fault. Don't blame yourself. I shouldn't have listened to Claire when she told me you married Sean. I just never thought she was that sick and disturbed." Jackson's mouth twisted with pain.

  I leaned up into him, kissing him gently on the lips, my heart filling with love. Enough love to blot out the regret.

  "Let's not d
well on the past. We've spent far too much time dwelling on what could have been. We're together now. That's all that matters."

  "Do you forgive me for contacting Claire?" Jackson looked vulnerable and unsure, an unfamiliar sight on his normally strong and confident face. "It was stupid of me, even though I didn't know the lies she had told you about us."

  I smiled gently at Jackson. "I forgive you for everything, as long as you forgive me for pushing you away all those years ago. I should have never lied to you and broken up with you. Then none of this would have ever happened."

  Jackson silenced me with a kiss, grazing his lips over mine reverently. "Like you said, let's not dwell on the past. I love you, Emma Mills. And I'm going to spend the rest of my life proving it to you."

  I leaned closer into him, my breath quickening as the kiss deepened. "I'll hold you to that."

  Epilogue

  "Jackson," I called out with a hint of impatience. "What's taking so long? We're going to be late."

  I was worried that we would miss our flight that was scheduled to leave in less than an hour. Jackson had been taking forever to pack and I was starting to get exasperated, tapping my foot as I waited for him in the living room.

  "Don't worry, sweetheart," Jackson said with a wink as he carried his suitcase out from the bedroom. "The plane's not going to take off without us. It's one of the advantages of flying privately."

  I rolled my eyes although I was relieved that Jackson was ready to go. I stood, grabbing my purse and pulling on my jacket. "Still. It's rude to keep everyone waiting."

  Jackson grinned, kissing me lightly as he grabbed my suitcase with his free hand. "It's a good thing I have you around to keep me grounded. Last time we took a private plane, you insisted on bringing your own food."

  "All those plates of cheese and fruit aren't free. Their prices are outrageous." I knew it was ridiculous to nickel and dime food on a private plane, but I always felt a little uncomfortable with all the extravagance that Jackson seemed to take for granted. Besides, I had glimpsed a previous bill for a private flight, and Jackson had been charged $300 for the food. A platter of cheese, fruit and crackers did not cost $300. And that didn't even take into account the wine.

 

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