Forsaken By the Others

by Jess Haines

  When he loosened his grip and coaxed me to embrace him, I wrapped my arms around his neck and clutched at him. The hurting, lonely, emotional side of me that wanted to believe it all—heart and soul—was winning out over the dark part whispering what a terrifically awful idea it was to trust him.

  “You aren’t a pet or some mindless puppet, Shiarra. I’ll only take what you’ll freely give me, never force anything from you. I might tease you now and again, but it will remain no more than the occasional attempt to fluster you or coax you into trying something beyond your comfort zone.” The fanged smile that curved his lips spoke of wicked things he already had in mind to talk me into. Even my dark, rational side admitted that might be some fun to go along with. “You have my word.”

  It might have been more stupidity on my part, but I believed him. He hadn’t hurt me, hadn’t driven me away, hadn’t done anything other than reassure and comfort me. True, his methods were sometimes abhorrent, but his intentions, though not always clear, were good. I was the one with the hang-ups here, and I felt no small measure of shame for constantly treating him as the bad guy or thinking him responsible for every evil that had befallen me since I’d been drawn into the doings of the Others in this city.

  I pressed a kiss to his chest before ducking my head, mumbling a few words that might or might not have been coherent. Spitting out the truth hurt, but I meant everything I said. “Sorry . . . I’m sorry, too. Shouldn’t have said—shouldn’t think so little of you. I’m sorry, Royce.”

  He rested his cheek on the top of my head as his fingertips ran soothingly along my back, just holding me. It took awhile, but eventually my tears tapered off.

  I’d done some terrible things during that time I had thought I might be turning into a werewolf, but maybe, with Royce’s help, picking up the shattered pieces of my life wouldn’t be as hard as I feared. Tackling everything alone had been incredibly foolish—as had my decision to go to the White Hats for help—so why not accept that the vampire could assist me? Aside from when he hadn’t really known me, or when he had been forced to by someone else, he had never done anything to hurt me. Doing things alone and ignoring his offers before had only gotten me into more trouble.

  When I tilted my head back to give him a speculative look, considering the possibilities, he leaned forward just enough to brush a kiss over my brow.

  “It’s been an intensely stressful month for you. If you can’t bring yourself to trust me now, at the very least, give me the opportunity to earn it. I imagine there may be other times in the days ahead when you will need reassurance. There is no need to suffer in silence. You will come to me and allow me to help you instead of rushing off on your own now, yes?”

  That hit a little too close to home. I gave him a sharp poke in the side, followed by a disgruntled snort. “Can we talk about anything other than that right now?”

  “After you promise you will come to me if you need assistance.”

  I squirmed under his weight, frowning up at him. His pointed look as he rolled to the side, curling his arm under his head as he stared back, gave me the courage to say exactly what I was thinking.

  “Fine. I promise”—Royce’s triumphant smirk faded when he realized I was tagging my own stipulation onto the deal—“if you promise you’ll stop trying to blackmail or manipulate me every time you want something.”

  His smile became more genuine. “Is that all?”

  I thought about it. “You’re also going to answer some questions. I’m tired of being scared and left in the dark. I hardly know anything about you. I want that to change.”

  “A reasonable request. Agreed.”

  “Good. Then I have something to ask right now.” He nodded for me to continue. “What the hell is with the futon?”

  He blinked. Then another slow smile spread, followed by a chuckle. “I suppose you were expecting some vast acreage of satin sheets and mounds of pillows, hmm?”

  I knew I was turning red, could feel the heat blossoming in my cheeks, but I folded my arms and gave him a raised eyebrow while waiting for him to answer. “Maybe I was. You’re not some college frat boy who can’t afford better, and every other piece of personal property of yours I’ve seen, from your clothes to your office—offices—whatever—practically screams ‘look at me, I have more money than God!’ So, explain it to me. Make me understand this piece of you.”

  He’d lived up to a number of vampire stereotypes in our previous encounters, being broody and dark and mysterious—but I knew there was more to him than that. The odd choice of furniture was one piece of the puzzle that didn’t fit, and I thought it might be a safe place to start learning more about the man hiding behind the mask of a monster. From the looks of things, he didn’t mind my prying, either. He rolled onto his back and folded both hands under his head, giving me a boyish grin and an excellent view of the scars ranging across the toned muscles of his chest.

  “Yes, I lived up to the cliché. Up until recently, I had the huge bed and all the necessary accessories to make this place a suitable haven to live out every imaginable debauched and depraved sexual fantasy that I desired.” As hard as it was, I kept my gaze steady on his, even though I was pretty sure I was about to ignite from my own embarrassment. “Do you know, less than a year ago, a woman—a human woman—reminded me how very important it was to value my freedom and humanity?”

  I was getting an inkling that he was referring to me, but I still didn’t see what that had to do with his futon or the sexcapades he was referring to. I’m sure he gathered I was confused. As he continued speaking, he rolled onto his hands and knees and crept toward me. I lay back as he approached, a teensy bit apprehensive about the predatory nature of his movements; he didn’t stop until he was positioned above me.

  “A very brave and foolish girl saved me from the very fate I had subjected countless others to. She freed me from what could have been lifetimes of slavery to someone who cared nothing for who or what I was. And while she could have taken that artifact and used me for her own ends, she did not. Though I wished that she would let me do something to show her how thankful I was to her for showing me such mercy, she would not have me.”

  I bit my lip and pressed my palm to his cheek, not sure what to say to this strange confession of his. He was still smiling, so I knew he wasn’t angry with me, but it was surreal to hear him talk about me like I was some brilliant savior. Considering how little I knew about his world, that could be taken as very flattering, or very alarming.

  “When I saw how humbly she lived, it served as a reminder of who I really was and where I came from. A futon is not quite the same as the bedding from my home on the farm when I was human, but it serves as an adequate reminder. Every night—from the moment I wake, and again, before I take my day’s rest—I am reminded that despite all of the luxuries available to me, they are not to come at the expense of another’s freedom. That there is no shame in taking the weak and making them strong.” He leaned in to kiss and nip at a spot that nearly had me come off the bed. “. . . And, perhaps now I can get that great big bed back and keep you close instead. What do you think? Will you remind me when I should show mercy?”

  “If you keep doing that thing with your tongue.” I tangled my fingers in his hair, gasping when he repeated the motion. “I’ll . . . I’ll . . .”

  He paused, glancing up at me with a fangy grin and raised brows. “You’ll what?”

  I laughed and pushed him back. “I’ll think of something. Don’t stop!”

  And after that, he didn’t.

  Chapter 2

  Christ, it was weird to be a vampire’s toy.

  I had about a million and one questions for Royce, but we kept being interrupted by phone calls. He’d forbidden anyone to enter his room, so it seemed just about everyone in New York had to call him right then to talk about something more urgent than my burning desire to know stuff about him. Like why, since he was technically dead, he could still get it up. Plus I needed to know if he had any wa
y to find out if Jack and the other White Hats had survived the fight last night against the Ravenwood werewolves.

  Maybe a teensy part of me wondered—very guiltily—if Chaz had survived, too.

  While some of my senses still seemed abnormally heightened, for the most part I could only make out Royce’s side of the conversations. It was at turns fascinating listening to how he ran his empire—and picking up some juicy tidbits about a missing case of some expensive-sounding wine from one of his restaurants, making the private investigator in me itch to know more—and boring as hell. The parts about quotas, headcounts, and company stock nearly put me back to sleep.

  “I’m sorry,” he said to me at one point, covering the mouthpiece of his phone so the lawyer on the other end wouldn’t overhear. “Things have gotten a bit out of hand without John here to field the mundane issues. Angus and Jessica have stepped in to a degree, but there is only so much they can deal with on their own.”

  I eyed the screen of the laptop he’d popped open a few minutes before, curious about the mountain of e-mails he hadn’t yet tackled. From where I was sitting, it looked like he got more legitimate e-mails in a day than I did in a month. “Maybe I should grab a shower and get dressed.”

  “Hmm? Oh, just give me a moment to wrap this up. I’ll join you.” Then, into the phone, more forcefully, “Glen, I’m done. Save the paperwork for when I visit the firm next week.”

  The lawyer was obviously peeved. This time I could hear the speaker loud and clear. “Those interrogatories you put off are due in less than a week. I need to prep you for the depositions scheduled—”

  “Yes, and we’ll discuss this later,” Royce said, with far more patience than I would have been able to muster in his position. “I’ll call you later tonight. Give me an hour or two to get things settled and get ready. ”

  “An hour, Alec. I know you hate the legal bullshit and red tape, but we’re running out of extensions, and there’s only so much I can do to cover your ass when you don’t work with me.”

  I couldn’t believe Royce was letting someone talk to him like that. The vampire made some sounds of contrition before he snapped his cell phone shut and then turned it off. Finally.

  “Now, where were we . . . ?”

  Between one blink and the next, I found myself on my back, his lips latched onto my throat as he playfully sucked where he had bitten me last night. For some reason, tilting my head back like that made a bit of a tickle form in my throat, so I was at turns giggling and coughing as he worked his way down my body. It was hard to be mad at him for allowing all of those interruptions when he so obviously wanted to spend his time with me.

  And then someone knocked on the door.

  He practically collapsed on top of me, groaning. I flailed a bit so he’d give me some room to breathe as he barked out a harsh, “What?!” over his shoulder.

  Clarisse poked her head in the door, grinning when she saw us. Probably because she now had confirmation that I’d spent the night doing more than sleeping with Royce and she could collect on a bet. Or maybe because she was getting a good gander at his bare ass. “Ah, lovey, ye need tae come—”

  Royce twisted around and gave her a look that stopped whatever words the Irish vampire was going to say in their tracks. Her eyes widened, and she nodded rapidly.

  “Right, then. I’ll just take care of that for ye, lad. I’ll, erm, keep the rest of the wolves at bay, shall I?”

  The growl that rumbled in his chest gave me the shivers and was all the answer Clarisse needed. She disappeared without another word, the door clicking shut behind her.

  He levered up on his elbows and glanced down at me with a frown. “This is not quite how I anticipated my first evening with you would turn out.”

  “I’d hope not,” was my dry response. “How about that shower? Unless you think we’ll be interrupted there, too . . .”

  A wicked twinkle sparkled in his eyes, his frown soon replaced by a sly grin. “Are you sure you wouldn’t mind a bit of extra company? I’m sure I could arrange something.” It didn’t take long for my flat stare to coax laughter out of him. “I’m joking, Shiarra. For now, I plan on keeping you to myself. I’m not terribly good at sharing.”

  With that, he scooped me up in his arms, and carried me to the bathroom. He set me on my feet and started the shower, while I leaned my hip against the marble sink and enjoyed the view. The steam seemed to be easing the tickle in my throat, though my voice still came out in a more throaty whisper than I intended.

  “I don’t suppose you feel like telling me what your plans for me are?” At the look he gave me over his shoulder, I snorted. “I don’t mean right now. Duh. I mean like later tonight. Tomorrow. The day after that.”

  He reached out to take my hand and tug me with him under the spray of multiple showerheads. “There will be more than enough time to worry about that later. Let’s focus on right now, shall we?”

  His obvious ploy to get me to leave the subject alone was made more obvious by the sudden, intense kiss he used to keep my mouth busy. Unsurprisingly, it worked.

  There wasn’t much getting clean happening in that shower, but for the time being, I was happy to let that slide. Much like last night, Royce paid very close attention to the places he knew would make me stop caring about anything aside from the moment. Thoughts surrounding what to do about the police, the Ravenwoods (or whoever it was out for my blood), what had happened to Jack, what I would do about my family, and if Royce knew why I hadn’t changed into a werewolf, were blown right out of my head. For a good long while, I didn’t care, and was happy to let all of those worries melt away under the vampire’s talented ministrations.

  Like most good things in my life, it wasn’t destined to last. Royce murmured a soft curse against my lips when a pounding sound came from somewhere outside the room. He put a little extra pressure on a spot that made me squeal in a very good way, but whoever was knocking wasn’t going away.

  Royce muttered a quiet expletive and straightened, holding me steady until my weak knees were ready to hold me up on their own. “Wait here.” He gave me a parting kiss and a wolfish grin as he opened the glass door. “Get lathered up; I won’t be long.”

  “Can’t it wait? We still need to get cleaned up,” I said, reaching for him. He took my hand and kissed my knuckles in a move that would have been charmingly gallant if not for his nakedness.

  “They wouldn’t be interrupting if it weren’t important. I’ll get it settled quickly. You be ready for me when I get back. I don’t like to wait.”

  “Could’ve fooled me,” I muttered.

  In a flash, I was pressed up against the shower wall, and I didn’t need any more proof of his desire. As my hands settled on his shoulders, he bit my earlobe lightly, sending a shock of pleasure down my spine. He then whispered in my ear, making me squirm in all the right ways. “Don’t doubt for a moment that you’re mine, my little hunter. You’ve been mine longer than you know. A few moments apart will never change that, and I’ll spend eternity proving it to you if you need me to.”

  I would’ve answered, but I was a bit too busy trying to pull him back to nibble on my ear some more. I pouted when he drew back despite my urging him to continue.

  That earned another wicked twinkle in his eye and a razor smile that made my heart do a funny little leap in my chest. My cheeks burned at his next comment.

  “Be glad of my constraint, Ms. Waynest. If I had waited much longer to drag you to my bed, you might not have survived my efforts to scrub every other partner you’ve ever had out of your mind. When I return, I intend to finish what I started. Be ready.”

  He turned away. I huffed and, with my newfound resolve not to be afraid of him, found it in me to slap his ass as a parting shot. My God, I had to be insane; he was going to kill me for that—

  The look he shot me over his shoulder was dark and full of promise, a hint of fang visible in his grin. It was all the things he didn’t say in that heated look that made me burn with
a flash of desire. Much to my surprise, this left me breathless and quivering in anticipation instead of from holy-hell-I’m-going-to-pee-my-pants-before-I-die terror. He grabbed a towel to wrap around his waist and disappeared into the bedroom.

  Maybe a bit disappointed, but no less enthusiastic for what would no doubt happen once he returned, I took my time picking out which product to use to get soaped up like he’d mentioned.

  The shower was gigantic, and the selection of skin and hair care products looked like it belonged in a spa. Some of them didn’t have labels, and I took my time enjoying taking in the unusual scents and rubbing the different oils between my fingers to see what would work best for what I had in mind.

  I sat down on the marble bench that ran along the wall, closing my eyes and enjoying the warm spray as I rubbed some vanilla-and-something-scented shampoo into my hair. While I was massaging my scalp, something stung my eyes. Figuring it was just some soapsuds, I rinsed a hand off and splashed some water on my face. The sting didn’t alleviate.

  The tickle in my throat grew worse as I scrubbed furiously at my eyes. When I managed to squint them open, I spotted a mix of blood and black crud on my fingers being rinsed away.

  Coughing, I pressed a hand under my nose. The warm wetness there was from another nosebleed, not the shower spray. Crap.

  It wasn’t as bad as it had been while I was hiding with the White Hats, but it was still nasty. I stuck my face under the spray and groped for a washcloth, scrubbing the residue from the corners of my eyes and around my nose.

  A cold hand closed on my upper arm and yanked me back, another soon pressing against my jaw to tilt my head back. It hurt too badly to open my eyes, but I wasn’t afraid.

  Well, maybe I was a little afraid.

  Shut up; you’d squeak like that too if you couldn’t see who was grabbing at you while you were naked in someone else’s shower.

  “When did this start?”

  Royce’s voice was sharp, cutting. I wasn’t expecting it and coughed a few times before stammering out a response. “Just a minute ago. I’m fine. Let go!”