Shamrocks and Secrets

by Cayce Poponea

  It had been a month since my visit to Coleen's grave and I honestly smiled as I thought about Patrick. He wasn't the person I had thought he would be. It was almost as if he had a split personality. With me he was gentle and caring, but when we were out to dinner and we ran into anyone else, he had this mask that he put into place. At times, it was somewhat unnerving, as if I didn’t know who I was with. Then in an instant, he was back to being the loving man who held my hand and kissed my forehead.

  Unfortunately, that was all we had done, kiss and hold hands. He had this crazy notion that he still had to prove himself.

  So for now, I settled for what he was willing to give me.

  Charlotte had set up two interviews for today; the first was a no-show and the second was waiting in her office. Imagine my surprise when I walked into the room to find Harley sitting in a chair.

  Harley looked completely different. Gone were the trashy halters, pleather skirts, and knee-high boots. In their place were a silk blouse, pencil skirt, and demure kitten heels. Her makeup was minimal and her cleavage hidden. She actually looked more beautiful.

  "Harley?"

  My shock could clearly be heard in my voice, I never expected to see her sitting in that chair.

  "Hello, Ms. O'Rourke, and if you please, my name is Francesca Ciccone, Frankie for short.”

  Her voice was relaxed without a hint of sarcasm.

  "Oh, I'm sorry. Please excuse me; that was rude. Frankie, it's a pleasure to see you again."

  She simply smiled at me and then turned to look at a stunned Charlotte.

  "I take it we know each other," Charlotte chuckled and then opened a file.

  Charlotte went into detail about the type of person we were looking for and the requirements we had. Basically, we needed an assistant for both Charlotte and myself. She would be responsible for scheduling all the staff, and making certain our schedules were accurate. She would also take care of renting out the ballroom next door.

  "So, I'd basically have to make sure you guys weren't double-booked and that people are where they're told to be."

  Charlotte and I laughed and then agreed with her. I looked back at Frankie; she had her hands in her lap, fidgeting with her beaded bracelet.

  "I know you know about me, but I want you to know that I don't want to be that person anymore." Her voice was lower this time and I could hear the sadness she was trying to hide.

  "I won't lie to you and say that I'm the best person for this job. I’m just asking for a chance to have a job that I can be proud of.

  “Ms. O'Rourke, I know that you especially don't have a very high opinion of me. It's no secret that I wanted Patrick. He never noticed me though, and I knew the second he gave you the bracelet that all hope for me was gone. I hope that if I get a good job and a nice place to live, maybe then I can turn the head of a good man like Patrick.”

  I had no doubt that she was being honest. I wanted to give her a chance and I hoped that Charlotte felt the same. There was only one concern I had and it needed to be addressed.

  "Frankie, I think it's wonderful that you want to change your life and I'll help however you need me to, but I do have a concern and I think you already know what I mean."

  She nodded her head and looked down, fidgeting in her chair. "You're worried that I'm a coke head like Michelle."

  "Yes, Frankie, and there's no room for that activity in this business."

  She reached into her purse and retrieved a stack of papers. Handing them to me, she continued to speak. “When Patrick found out I was in there with Michelle, he chewed me a new one, and then he made me talk to a counselor. He makes me take monthly drug tests. I've been clean for a while now."

  I took the papers from her; they were lab reports that showed she had no drugs in her system. The latest was dated two days ago.

  "Does Patrick know you're here?" Charlotte questioned. She had let me lead this interview up to this point.

  "No, he just told me to find a real lady and learn from her. I only know two ladies and I'm scared to death of Mrs. Malloy. Since Ms. O'Rourke is my only other choice, I'm going to try to be like her. Patrick said he agreed that Ms. O'Rourke was a real lady and that I could learn a lot from her. That's what I want, to be a real lady."

  How do you respond to that? I looked to Charlotte for help, but she was just as speechless as I was.

  "Well, Ms. Ciccone, I think you'd bring a new spin to things around here. Don’t you agree, Christi?"

  "Oh, please, just Frankie. It's hard enough to get used to not being called Harley."

  Charlotte looked lovingly at her. She rose from her chair and made her way around, leaning her body against the desk.

  "Lady lesson number one: a proper title is the first sign you're being seen as a lady. Now, Ms. Ciccone, I'll expect you here in the office by nine o'clock every morning. Are we clear?”

  The shock on her face nearly brought tears to my eyes. In an instant she was on her feet and hugging Charlotte like a life ring being tossed to a drowning man.

  “You wont regret this, I swear Ms. Charlotte.”

  Charlotte smiled back and could only laugh at her excitement, “I’m holding you to that.”

  Frankie had been working in the office for a little over a week. She wasn't perfect, but she really tried hard. Patrick only smiled and kissed my forehead when I told him we had hired her.

  This week was scheduled to be crazy as it was Shannon's engagement party and one of Paige's bridal showers. Patrick insisted that he wanted to throw the engagement party, and since he didn't have anyone to argue with him, he gave me a credit card and told me to make it special.

  Paige's bridal shower was being hosted by Caleb's family. It was hard to contain my laughter when Nora would refer to them as "the hillbillies." Caleb's family was from the deep South. His mother was off-the-boat Irish, but his father was as southern as sweet tea. Nora told me that Eileen Montgomery was one to put on airs. She had left Ireland when her father insisted she marry his right-hand man. She didn't agree, so she jumped on a ship and here she came. Sherman Montgomery had been a moonshine runner at the time. He found her working in a rundown diner and fell in love with her accent.

  Sherman had taken over for his dad like Patrick had taken over for Thomas. The Montgomery family wasn't as big as the Malloy family, but Patrick wanted to branch out further. Paige and Caleb made a good match, so the family would be joined. It didn't matter if Paige didn't marry full Irish, she wasn't eligible to take over the family business.

  According to Nora, Eileen had colorful ways to describe what her husband did. For example, when he was running moonshine, he was in “exporting,” When he moved up to take over his father's role, he was now the “CEO and general manager”.

  Frankie was at the office by six o'clock in the morning for Shannon's engagement party. I had spoken to her and told her that she would be in charge of this event because as my sister's maid of honor, I had to be available to her at all times. You would think that I had just handed Frankie a million dollars the way her face lit up. By the time I stopped by to make sure the flowers were delivered, she had the tables set up and was stocking the bar by herself.

  That night as I danced with Patrick, I took a long look around the room and let my mind wander for just a second, I thought about what this would be like for Patrick and me. I couldn't imagine who would be on the guest list knowing that Patrick had more business associates than family.

  "What has you so lost in thought, Pretty girl?" Patrick's masculine voice whispered into my ear, his lips making brief contact with the shell.

  "I was just daydreaming," I sighed in return.

  "Care to share, or can I take a guess?"

  I snuggled in tighter as I laid my cheek on his chest. I felt so safe wrapped in his arms; I couldn't remember a time when I felt safer. Every time we were together, he held me just like this.

  "Honestly, I was wondering what this would be like for us." I held my breath as he continued to lead me arou
nd the floor to the slow song. We hadn't been together that long and I really shouldn't have been thinking this way. It was strange to think that not that long ago, I was trying to push him away. Now I wanted to pull him closer.

  Patrick only hummed as he replied, "Not sure if this room would be big enough, Ma would invite everyone she ever knew."

  I could only hope that someday we would find out if the room was big enough. I buried my face in further and wrapped my arms around his waist. It was so easy to forget that he carried a gun, until my hand managed to find it hidden in the holster in his pants. The first time it happened, I gasped and jumped away out of pure shock. As it happened more and more, I would just move my hand a few inches away. He would just kiss me and make me forget.

  "I promise, it'll be better hidden at our wedding."

  His words were what caused me to gasp this time. As I looked at him, he only smiled and looked down into my eyes.

  "Shit, you think I worked this hard to just quit half way?"

  "I really wasn't certain. I mean, it wasn't that long ago that I was trying to get you together with Harley."

  "Oh, Christi, I want this more than you know."

  I watched as Shannon and Dillion visited with their guests. Shannon was so happy and Dillion was so attentive to her. I noticed that he would touch her very subtly; it was as if he was reassuring himself she was real.

  Patrick had excused himself to make a phone call and when he returned, I noticed that he did the same thing with me. It wasn't much, a brush of his fingers or placing his hand on my back. He was doing this for his benefit, but what he did reassured me as well.

  Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Brad making his way over to where Patrick and Dillion were speaking. I couldn't hear what was being said, but I could tell it wasn't good.

  Dillion looked at Patrick and shook his head, and then they hugged. Dillion returned to Shannon's side and whispered something into her ear. Patrick made a phone call and then came over to where I was standing.

  "I'm sorry, Christi, I have to go take care of some business."

  "Business?" I questioned. "Sorry, its none of my..."

  "I have to go and remind someone that loyalty and responsibility doesn't stop when you go home."

  I wasn't about to ask him what he meant by that. By his tone of voice, someone might just die tonight, so I deduced the less I knew, the better.

  "I would ask you to stay with me tonight, but I know you'll say no."

  "You'll never know unless you ask."

  “All right, will you let Angus take you to my condo and will you stay with me tonight?"

  I smiled devilishly and then pretending to think. "Yes, Mr. Malloy, I'll go to your condo and wait for you."

  The party had nearly cleared out when my sister approached me. "I can't thank you enough for tonight, it was so amazing."

  She was glowing with excitement. It was worth all the planning to have her smile like this.

  "Oh, Sweetie, I'm so happy for you. You deserve to be this happy." I hugged her tightly, a tear escaping that I quickly wiped away.

  I noticed out of the corner of my eye that Dillion was speaking with Brad. Again, I really didn't want to know what was happening.

  Shannon picked up on my observation. "You'd think Douce would've learned the first time."

  "Huh?"

  "When Patrick first confronted him about Abby, he told him to take care of his responsibilities. As soon as he heard that Dillion had asked me to marry him, he decided that Dillion could take over supporting her."

  I looked at her with confusion.

  "Since the truth has come out about Abby, it seems she isn't his only child out there. Douce has four others, the paternity results came out today."

  So that was where Patrick was headed.

  Once the room was completely empty and I had said goodnight to Dillion and Shannon, I found Angus and instructed him to take me to Patrick's.

  Once inside the building, I made my way up to his floor. It felt strange to be there without him. I knew Patrick wouldn’t mind if I made myself at home, so I opened a bottle of wine and got comfortable on his couch.

  I had just poured my second glass of wine when he came home. He crossed the room and kissed my forehead, trailing down to my neck.

  "I could get used to having you here when I get home."

  I looked into his eyes as I took another sip of wine. I wasn't going to respond to that one.

  Without another word, Patrick took my glass, placed it on the table, and then extended his hand to me. Once off the couch, he led me down the hall to his bedroom.

  The only lights in the room came from the glow of the city below. Patrick stopped just shy of his bed and wrapped me in his arms. His lips found mine as he kissed me with purpose. His hands found the zipper of my dress and ever so slowly he began to unzip it as he continued to kiss me.

  My hands made their way to the inside of his suit jacket and removed it from his shoulders before I made quick work of his dress shirt. Patrick slowly steered me onto the mattress, never once breaking our kiss. The feel of his weight on me was enough to make me moan, that and the fact that his mouth had found my neck. Patrick reached around my back and unhooked my bra, removing it so quickly I didn't even realize it had been removed.

  "Mo dsha, Christi, ta' tu' nois aille' na shamuhlu me’ (My God, Christi, you're so beautiful),” his voice was so thick with want.

  "A t'u liom go mbraaitheann dheanann sli,” (You make me that way.) I replied breathlessly.

  "I never thought hearing Gaelic could actually make me hard." He pushed his pelvis into my heated core to show me how hard he really was.

  “Patrick…condom…”

  He continued as if he didn't hear me. I began to push his chest to make him stop.

  “What?" His voice full of want, breathless and yearning.

  "I said, condom.” I spoke a little firmer this time.

  "Why? You're on the pill, right?"

  I looked at him with disbelief. "Yes, but that doesn't change the fact that I have no idea if you're clean or not."

  The look on his face was one of astonishment, and then anger.

  "Are you telling me you think I'm cheating on you?"

  "No, but I am pretty certain you aren't a virgin."

  "No, but neither are you."

  We had recently had the past partners discussion. He wouldn't admit to a particular number, only that it was more than one and less than thirty.

  I told him about my only two encounters. My first had been Mikey O'Toole, and it had been over so quickly that I wasn’t even certain it really happened. The second came a few years ago with a guy I thought I would marry, thus the reason for the pill.

  "Yes, but your number is higher than mine, and besides, you should be asking me if I'm clean as well."

  "I don't have to ask you!" His voice was now raised and his face was red with anger. "Damn it, Christi, I didn't sleep with any of the girls at the club! Why would you think that?”

  Now I was angry; just because he didn't sleep with strippers, he felt safe?

  "Oh, so you always slept with virgins?"

  He didn't respond.

  I began to move to the edge of the bed.

  "Christi, I don't see what the big deal is. If you're worried about getting pregnant..."

  "No, Patrick, I'm not worried about getting pregnant, I'm worried about getting some life-threatening or disgusting STD. You seem to think because you've only been with non-strippers that you're exempt. Do you honestly think that girls who willingly fall into bed with a mob boss haven't been with other men?"

  I began to get dressed; he was crazy if he thought I was going any further.

  "No, Christi, I don't think I'm exempt, but I have no symptoms..."

  "Did you not pay attention in health class? Most men get no symptoms...Ugh!”

  I was done; he obviously didn't care about the severity of this situation.

  "Christi, wait...I...I..."

/>   "You what, Patrick? What can you possibly have to say that would change this?"

  He only looked at me, but said nothing.

  I spun on my heel and left a naked Patrick sitting on his bed.

  "I love you!" he shouted as I opened the door, but I continued out of the condo. Michigan Avenue was actually busy for the late hour. I literally stepped out of the door and into a cab.

  There was only one place where I would feel safe right now; only one person who I could just sit with and not be questioned all night. I quickly told the cab driver the address and twenty minutes later, I was standing outside a door I knew well.

  I pushed the illuminated button and listened as the bell chimed inside the house. Moments later, the porch light snapped on, followed by the quick opening of the door.

  “D...daddy...” I managed to get out before the sobs began.

  "Come here," my dad spoke as he pulled me into the house.

  I made my way into his living room and then collapsed into the cushions of the couch.

  "He's called three times already; I thought for sure you would've gone to your sister's."I shook my head quickly, pulling my knees up under me, wrapping my arms around a throw pillow and sobbing into it.

  "She's too happy, and she would've wanted to talk about it."

  My father made no comment. He crossed the room and filled two glasses with an amber liquid.

  "Here, this'll take the edge off."

  I drank what was in the glass, and then handed it back to him. We sat together quietly for several minutes before he began.

  "Christi, I have a question that I have to ask." Turning to me, he took my hands in his, "Did he physically hurt you?"

  "No, Dad, he didn't hit me."

  I turned my entire body and crawled into his waiting arms. Even as a grown woman, I never felt safer than in my daddy’s arms.

  "Christi, I need to call him and let him know you're safe. Regardless of what he did or didn't do, he needs to know you're here and safe with me."

  I simply nodded and curled further into my dad's side.