Three Score and Ten, What Then?

by Peggy Mary E. Smith

  The next day we travelled on to Lethbridge. At long last the Rockies were in sight, and what an amazing sight it surely was. It was breathtaking to say the least. Logan and I were simply in awe! It is just something you have to see to appreciate. It was well worth the ten day trip to get there. I was so excited and mesmerized that I started to cry. We had made it! Another tick on our bucket list. Of course, Lethbridge is situated on the banks of the infamous Old Man River, which was a marvel to see in itself. We stopped briefly at the Fort Whoop-up Historical Site. It was a glimpse of the wild-west. Logan and I got a charge out of that.

  We headed west from there into the mountains through the Crowsnest Pass and got as far as Fernie, British Columbia before stopping for the night. It is a beautiful spot situated along the Elk River and surrounded by the mountains. It was picturesque in every direction, just so very beautiful. Pictures just don’t portray what you see with your own eyes. It had been a long day, but what an adventure. It was quite the harrowing drive at times. The roads were twisty and steep and often narrow. We stopped to rest and take pictures and to just enjoy the grandeur several times. Mother Nature is at her finest in those parts. We just soaked it all in. What a beautiful part of Canada.

  It was everything we had heard it would be and more. The view in every direction was just spectacular. As we drove along, we experienced our first sight of elk and bighorn sheep and got a glimpse at some mountain goats. We saw a sow grizzly bear with her two cubs. Logan and I were giddy with excitement. There was just so much to absorb and so much to see.

  Another two full days driving got us into Vancouver. We were at the west coast. We’d made it. Two weeks had passed since we’d set the old Chevy in a westward direction bound for the Pacific shores, and we had finally arrived. We’d put 2800 miles between us and home, and there we were looking out over the Pacific Ocean. And what a sight it was.

  What a trek it had been to get there. We were tired of all that sitting around, so we stayed on there for a few days to see some sights. We certainly enjoyed the ocean. Logan and I strolled along the harbourfront watching the big freighters disappear in the horizon. It was mesmerizing looking out to sea, trying to differentiate where the ocean stopped and the sky began. It was such pure and simple beauty.

  Stanley Park was on the agenda, too, of course. It was well worth the stop. Those huge fir trees were majestic. We had never seen such humongous trees in all our born days. Logan had it figured that just one tree would build a whole house. A big one. I forget how many board feet of lumber he had it figured would be in one tree.

  Well, after a few days, we were rested up, and knew we had a long way to get back home, so we pointed the old Chevy eastward and headed out. We traveled to Kamloops and through the Okanagan Valley to Revelstoke and bunked down for the night. The next day got us back into Alberta and we went as far as Banff. We had driven through Roger’s Pass and made a stop in Glacier National Park. What pristine beauty! Words can’t describe it.

  The next day we travelled up to Jasper, stopping at Lake Louise and other sites. We tried to soak it all in. We knew that in another day we would be out of the mountains and putting all this natural grandeur behind us. I hoped the multitude of pictures that I had taken had captured Mother Nature at her finest. The beauty that we had witnessed was simply overwhelming. We certainly had lots to tell the children.

  We were into September by this time and knew that the best part of our adventure was behind us. Home was starting to sound pretty good, and Logan drove as far as Edmonton before we took a room for the night. We had left the mountains and foothills. The roadside scenery turned into an aspen woodland.

  We didn’t stay to do any sight-seeing and were off again the next day. The famous West Edmonton Mall wasn’t heard of yet. If my memory serves me correct, I believe it was built in the eighties. Anyway, we made our way to Saskatoon before nightfall that day. We were back into wheat fields and open prairie with sporadic patches of aspen. Huge grain elevators dotted the horizon as we passed through small towns along the way. The following day we drove on to a town called Russell. It is a small little spot just inside the Manitoba border. The people were very friendly as I recall. They were our type of folk.

  Then on to Winnipeg. That’s where we stopped next. We had travelled around the city on our way westward but decided to take a bed there going home. It is a very scenic spot built on the shores of the Red River. Even though it is a large urban centre, and cities didn’t really intrigue Logan and me, it has many historical sites of interest. Winnipeg’s beginnings go back to the early fur trade years. It was where the Great West Company and the Hudson Bay Company got their roots in the 1700s. In 1900, Winnipeg was the third largest city in Canada. It has a huge European population with some very unique architecture. We decided to take a tour.

  The next day got us back into Ontario, and we were getting eager to see home. We really pushed it and got almost to Thunder Bay before stopping. It was a long day. The next day got us to Wawa. We saw history in the making. Highway 17 had just been completed the week previous allowing traffic to travel the Lake Superior route going westward. That was pretty memorable knowing we were amongst the first travellers to use that section of road.

  Two more days got us back to where we had started. We pulled into our own driveway. What a great sight to see. It was good to know we’d be bunking down in our own bed that night. As grand as our adventure had been, there was just no place like home. We had put 6000 miles on that old Chevy, and she was still spinning like a top. She had got us there and brought us back. She was a good reliable automobile for sure, and it was a sad day when Logan traded the old girl in. She had taken us across Canada to see both oceans and all the land in between. Those were sure great times, and what great memories I have of those two marvellous trips.

  Your Grandpa and I sure did enjoy going on those trips, Beth. They were both grand adventures and highlights of our life. We talked about it all for years afterwards. We were so fascinated by Canada’s landscape. There are some beautiful sights to behold. We are so fortunate to live in such a wonderful country. Too many folks take it all for granted. I’m so thankful that Logan and I got to see it together. They were happy times indeed.”

  “I wasn’t very old when you and Grandpa took those trips, but I remember you both talking about them in later years. You’re always very excited when you talk about those two adventures. I can tell that you really enjoyed yourselves. I’ve seen most of your pictures, too. There are some that are spectacular. You’re certainly right in saying that Canada is a beautiful country. We’re very fortunate to live here.”

  “Yes we are, Beth. That’s for sure.”

  three score and ten

  “Well, everyone knows what the big deal was about in 1967, being that it was Canada’s centennial year and all. Lots of celebrations and hoopla went on across this great country in honour of such a great milestone. It was a good year, in deed, but it didn’t start out that way for me. I started the year off with another dang birthday. It wasn’t just any birthday, it was my seventieth. Time seemed to be moving on way too fast. All of a sudden I seemed to know what old meant. Because all of a sudden, I was part of that category. Well, hell, that sure took the wind out of my sails. I didn’t feel old, but there I was, seventy.

  I’ll tell you, it sure don’t take long for age to creep up on you! They say time flies when you’re having fun. Well, I guess that we were having a lot of fun because before we could think about it, I was having to blow out seventy candles on a birthday cake.

  It hadn’t seemed so bad a few years earlier when it was Logan’s big day. No other birthday had ever affected me so much. I hadn’t ever really put too much thought into age before. I had been raised in a generation where dying was as much a part of life as living. But death wasn’t what was really affecting me. I guess it was more the fact that I felt so dang good, but I had become so blasted old.

  That was a birthday that seemed to set me b
ack a little. I sure didn’t feel like we were getting closer to the end of our journey, but three score and ten is pretty much considered the normal person’s life expectancy. They say anything past that is borrowed time. It’s not very encouraging when you get there.

  I don’t hear the young folks mention that term anymore. People talk about decades, but I haven’t heard anyone say score for some time. The old timers used score as a term to mean twenty. Quite common terminology when I was a youngster.

  Ma and Pa had both passed on by this time. They had both succumbed to old age. Ma was ninety-four, and Pa had been ninety-five when he died. Actually, I think Pa died of a broken heart after seeing my brother Newton die of pneumonia six months before. Ma just seemed to give up once Pa was gone. Seemed like she just didn’t know how to keep on going without him. Of course, they had been part of each other’s life for over seventy years.

  After Pa and Ma had passed, I felt kind of different for a while. I was really sad and felt disconnected. It seemed like part of me was missing. They had been such a huge part of my life, and I had always been very close with them. They had always just been there, and the old farm felt like home as long as they remained. Suddenly it was Colt’s farm. I know their time had come, and they were tired, but that last good-bye was a tough one.

  Newton was fifty-nine at the time of his death. He had never married and had remained on the farm with Ma and Pa and my bother Colton and his family. Newton had come home from WWI a broken man. His lungs were weakened from being gassed, and he had always had breathing troubles. He had never gotten over the trauma of Dalton’s or Jed’s deaths, either. That had always played heavy on his health. My brother Lincoln had passed on by this time, too. All the years he had worked in the mines had taken its toll on his health. He had died in 1964 at the age of seventy-seven.

  My life felt incomplete without my parents and brothers. Their deaths reinforced the fact that we were all getting older. We were drawing nearer to the end of our own lives. When my seventieth birthday rolled around, I realized that I had become part of the older generation. It really affected me for some reason.

  I wasn’t afraid of dying; that’s the easy part. I just wasn’t ready to stop living. Ma used to say that you have to get busy living, or get busy dying. I had a lot of stuff to do before I was ready to kick the bucket, so I had to keep busy living. I can’t recall at this very moment what I still had on my bucket list back then, but I recollect thinking that I sure needed more time on the green side to get some things done.

  Anyway, Logan and Jackie had a huge birthday party for me. They thought that it might cheer me up some. I had never had a party before. I had always been the one putting them on for everyone else. I had always enjoyed doing all the fussing and planning. It had always been fun if it was meant to be a surprise for someone. I got a real charge out of that. Lord, how I loved surprising others. The truth is I just never took to being the centre of attention. I never liked to have people fuss over me.

  The party turned out to be a swell time. I never caught on to all the scheming that was done. I knew Charity was dropping in for a visit as she had told me she would. I figured that Jake and James and Jackie would slide in for a visit since they all lived close by, but the rest caught me by surprise. Logan and the girls outdid themselves.

  When everyone started to arrive, I was quite overwhelmed. I never even had a minute to gussy up a little. I was somewhat embarrassed with all the W.I. (Women’s Institute) ladies and church women that were invited. I was always the type that liked to clean-up a little before company arrived. To be caught short like that made me feel uncomfortable.

  Murray and Mary Beth managed to make their way up from Toronto. They had to travel the farthest, other than John, and he never came this way during the winter months. Most of my family were able to attend, except for a few of the grandchildren. Of course, we had thirty-eight altogether and it seems they’re scattered to the wind. Sure was nice to see all the little ones that were able to make it.

  Anyways, winter parties are tricky because you just can’t depend on the weather being good to travel in. I was right tickled to see the crowd that showed up. I suppose there were over a hundred well-wishers who dropped by. I was plum shaken up to be honest. It was an afternoon social, and then our family stayed on for a real nice supper that the girls had all kicked in on. We had lots of good eats, as Pa used to say.

  After supper, Logan put on a slide show. Projectors and home movies were quite a rage at that time. The youngsters got a hoot out of that. We had lots of good laughs for sure, and lots of good wine, too, as I recall. It turned out to be a weekend affair. The party was Saturday, and some of the crew stayed over until the next day. On Sunday, we skipped church and all joined up over at the old homestead. Colt and his family hosted a bonfire and skating party on the lake in my honour. It sure brought back a lot of my childhood memories. It was just like old times.

  Logan and I hadn’t skated in years, but we gave it a good go anyhow. We managed to get around the rink a couple of times before our ankles got the best of us. We were like two school kids or just crazy old farts. I’m not sure which.

  It got me to thinking back on all the hours us children had spent there as youngsters. It didn’t seem that long ago. It was hard to believe so much had changed. I guess that’s what time does; it just keeps moving forward, and you have to go with it or get left behind. We would celebrate our thirty-eighth wedding anniversary the next month, and I remember thinking that our love was just as true as it had been all those years ago. It was good to know something had stayed the same.

  I don’t recall too much about getting presents. We weren’t very much for that sort of thing. When I was growing up, a special cake was the usual fanfare for a birthday. No one could afford gifts much. We were content with a dry roof overhead, clean clothes to wear, and three filling meals to eat each day. Some of the children I knew didn’t have that.

  In today’s world, some folks seem to want more. Logan and I had come through some pretty rough spots during our time, so we were content to have the company of good friends and family to celebrate with on these special occasions. The gift of time and love, now what more could an old lady ask for? All I could say was – three score and ten, what then? Well, I had no idea what the future had in store for me, so I figured I’d just hold on for the ride.”

  visiting virginia rose

  “By the time the nineteen-sixties rolled around, life in the “Near North” had greatly changed. The medical society had created better medications. OHIP, or OMSIP as it was first called, had been brought into play in 1966, and people could afford to get proper doctor care. Life in general had improved since WWII, and people were living longer.

  Nursing homes had become part of this new era. The younger generations had no time to care for their aging parents. Women had taken to the work force and had careers. They were kept busy going to their jobs and running their homes on their time off. It had become a new lifestyle.

  If the elderly had no one to care for them, and they couldn’t stay in their own home, they had to move into a nursing home, or home for the aged as some were called. It seems that our senior citizens were no longer an important part of the family unit.

  Ma and Pa had had the luxury of dying in their own home. They had given the homestead to Colton after he had married Jane. They all lived together in that big old house that Pa and Ma had built to raise their big brood in. Pa died in his sleep in the bed in the room he had shared with Ma for near on seventy years. He had a heart attack, the doc had said. What a blessing for him and us as well. Though we were shocked at first, we realized that he had not suffered and had died in the comfort of his own home. Pa had always said that there was nothing better than a good old fashioned heart attack when your time came. Lot a truth in that, and that’s what took him.

  Ma died within the year. I think she just gave up after Pa had left her. She mourned him till the day she passed. She just kind
of withered away. In her last two weeks, she took to her bed. She was very frail and got so weak that she couldn’t eat. Jane and I were there and nursed her till her last breath. After the funeral, we laid her down beside Pa in her last resting spot. I felt relieved. They were together once again. I knew in my heart that that was what she had wanted.

  Looking back now, I am glad that Ma and Pa were able to die at home. They were surrounded by their loved ones in the comforts of their own home. It was the home they had built together, raised their family in, and enjoyed for over seventy years. That doesn’t happen much anymore.

  The first time I stepped foot into a nursing home was to visit my sister Rose. She was in her eighties by then. Her husband had died some twenty years earlier, and she had lived alone ever since. She had gotten very thin and frail. After a bout of pneumonia that put her in the hospital, she was not able to go home and look after herself.

  Rose’s daughter had offered for her to go and live with her, but Rose declined. Her daughter lived on a farm out towards the Parry Sound area, and Rose didn’t know anyone else out there. She said that she felt that she would be too big a burden to her daughter, but I think that she just wanted to stay closer to home.

  When I entered the nursing home, I felt like I had gone into a hospital. It had an institutional feeling. Everything was white. The walls were painted white, the curtains were white, the floor tiles were white, and the bedspreads on all the beds were white. It was very clean so to speak, and not real homey at all.

  Rose shared a room with three other ladies. There weren’t any that made for good company. The woman in the bed beside her had had a stroke. She couldn’t walk or talk. The woman directly across from her couldn’t walk and was in a wheelchair. She had some sort of dementia. All her speech was garbled and she didn’t make a lick of sense. The other woman in the room was bedridden. She seemed to be in a vegetative state. She slept mostly and stayed in bed all the time. The nurses had to force her to eat. Poor soul, she would have been better off gone.