Three Score and Ten, What Then?

by Peggy Mary E. Smith

  I was surprised that so many people came out to join the festivities. I was touched. I hadn’t realized that I had made such an impression on so many people. I hadn’t seen some of them for years. It brought back a lot of great memories.

  Some of my family members had brought their musical instruments with them. They treated everyone to a good selection of familiar tunes. Some folks got up to dance and kick up their heels. Others clapped their hands and sang along. It was positively superb. What a grand party it was, indeed. A real celebration to remember. I’m so grateful to my family for giving me such a wonderful, wonderful day. I would have died a happy woman should I have departed shortly thereafter.

  I look back now with such fond memories of that perfect day. It was the last time my whole crew was together. My Mary Beth died of a heart attack within the year. She dropped dead making supper one night. She was gone, just like that. What a blessing for her. It was a real shocker for the rest of us, though. It was tough news for a mother to receive.

  Murray passed away with cancer thirteen months later. Took him fast, it did. He was gone a month after his diagnosis. He was too far gone before they found it. He had time to get his affairs in order and say his last good-byes to his family. Then he was gone. Broke my heart, it did, to lose my two firstborn. Life isn’t supposed to be that way. It’s not the natural order at all. They had been Jed’s only legacy. Words just can’t tell the pain it brought to say that final good-bye.

  I remember thinking that I was well over a hundred and ready to go. I’d had a great life and had done a lot of living. I couldn’t figure out why my time hadn’t come. I had to bury three husbands and three children. Surely, it was time for me to leave soon. A body gets weary after enduring so much heartbreak and pain of grief, but yet I remained. I was five score. How much more?

  this changing world

  “It was only a few short years after I had celebrated my hundredth birthday that the twentieth century came to a close. A new millennium was soon upon us, and as 1999 drew near its end with each passing month, the year 2000 came into view. I remember thinking on that idea one day. Thinking that the world would soon be into a new century. It would soon be the twenty-first century. The third one for me to see. I never would have thought that I’d make it so far, but the years just kept on coming, one after the next.

  With that impending transition soon to be upon us, I couldn’t help reflecting on how times had changed. One thing I knew for certain was that things sure weren’t like they used to be. They call it progress. It seems that ever since the end of WWII, the world has moved forward in leaps and bounds. A body just can’t keep up with all the newfangled inventions. Everything has gone automatic.

  I was born into a world that was run on real horsepower. The best education a body could have was knowing how to put in a hard day’s labour. Everything was earned by the sweat of your brow. Back in those times, people only concerned themselves with meeting their needs. Wants weren’t often on the agenda. Not for most folks around here at any rate. That was just the way of pioneer life, and everyone seemed to be in the same boat. It kept people busy making sure there was enough food on the table, a good roof overhead, and enough wood in the shed to stay warm through the cold northern winters. That is what was most important in those times.

  Back when I was a youngster, most everything was homemade. The women folk did all their own cooking and baking, preserving, pickling, dressmaking and sewing, knitting and needle work. The men folk were craftsmen, too. They built the house and made most of the furniture. They made and repaired their harness and leather goods and tools, as well. No one would have thought of purchasing an axe or shovel handle. They would have gone out to the back forty, cut down a sizeable ironwood tree, and whittled out a new one.

  Of course, all the food had to be hunted, gathered, picked, or grown. That in itself was a job and a lot of work. Everyone in the household played a certain part in the various aspects of food production and preparation. It was all just part of living a subsistence lifestyle. I don’t ever remember a time when we went hungry. Ma was a wonderful cook and always put on a good spread. It wasn’t fancy, but it was nutritious, and there was no cause for alarm as to what chemicals and preservatives might be in it. Just wholesome victuals.

  We made all our own clothes as well as those for our family members. We were kept busy sewing and knitting, crocheting and darning. It was almost unheard of to go shopping for a new dress or sweater. Clothes were more of a necessity than a luxury. We didn’t have very many extras. Nobody had the need for a walk-in closet, that’s for sure. In fact, most of those old farmhouses didn’t even have closets in the bedrooms at all.

  Back in those days the men folk took great pride in making furniture for their homes. Not very much was store bought. There weren’t that many places to buy it either. There were lots of superb craftsmen back then. It was an art form passed on from generation to generation. The furniture was made of nice solid wood, all hand-crafted. Of course, people seemed to respect their possessions back then and took real good care of them. I suppose that’s why there are antique businesses today. Things were made to last.

  Things have sure changed in today’s world. I find that the whole world has got to be a busy place, stressful even. Travel has become a great importance. People are jumping into their cars to go somewhere at all times. Even if it is just down the street. When I was growing up, horses were the way to get around. We hitched them up to the buckboard or sleigh. Usually, it was to go to church or into town for supplies. Sometimes we’d go to a social outing or a work bee. Us children were most often out and about by way of walking on our own two feet. We certainly didn’t get driven to see our friends. When bicycles came about, we thought that they were the greatest thing.

  Yes, I have seen the world go from horse and buggy to train, to automobile, to airplane travel. Some of the back roads we used to travel on weren’t more than a cart path. Now they’re paved. And those four-lane highways going into the cities, well, I just have no words for all that congestion. The world has just got way too fast.

  I can still recall the first time I saw an automobile. I was in my early twenties. It seemed so foreign to me. A horseless carriage is what they were referred to. They seemed like a loud and awkward contraption, but in a few short decades it seemed like they became a necessity. Now everyone owns at least one.

  Logan taught me to drive after we were married. He had an old delivery truck for the business and a family car. He said it was important for me to learn to drive in case I ever had to take one of the children to the doctor or such. Not many women drove back then. I thought it was quite a privilege. Now everyone drives and takes it for granted.

  Airplane travel is still foreign to me. I went up in a small plane once and flew over the homestead and this whole area. That was phenomenal. It was an incredible experience seeing all the landmarks from up in the air. I remember making the remark that I hadn’t realized how many wonderful shades of green there are. Nowadays, more folks than not travel the world on a regular basis. I never would have known it to be possible when I was a little girl. I barely went to town, never mind going someplace else around the world.

  And phones, now that’s something else that’s got me thinking. It wasn’t until I moved to the store with Logan that I had a phone in the house. It seemed it was the greatest thing at the time. It was a real time-saver and great for Logan’s business. Lots of folks came to the store to make phone calls, and sometimes people phoned the store to leave messages for folks, and we’d have to see to it that they got the message. It took some years before old “Ma Bell” bought out all the little local phone companies and connected everyone up nationwide, but it didn’t stop there. No siree!

  Cell phones are the latest thing now, I guess. I thought that they were a great idea when they first come out. I had no conception of how they worked, but thought they could be real useful in all the remote areas. A real lifesaver in fact, but you k
now what happens when something like that comes along. Everyone has to have one. Now it doesn’t matter where you go; someone is on their phone. It’s gotten a little out of hand if you ask me. I grew up during different times, I suppose. Private phone calls should be kept just that, “private”! The whole grocery store, or restaurant, shouldn’t have to hear about one’s private affairs. I know I sure don’t want to listen to some stranger spewing their guts out about their personal affairs while I’m out shopping. Plum disrespectful, it is.

  The television is another invention that wasn’t around when I was a youngster. In fact, my own children were all grown up before we had one in our home. They were real expensive back then. I think we paid near four-hundred dollars for our first one, and that was in the fifties. The picture was in black and white, and we only got one channel, but it was exciting all the same. Now you can buy a television the same size for a hundred dollars and get a multitude of channels and the picture is in colour. Who’d a thought?

  I guess the latest trend is computers. They are a big part in most households now. I have never used one, but I know they have bombarded the world. I’ve been told they actually run the world. Just about everything is either computerized or has some sort of computer as its major component. Hard for an old lady like me to figure out. I would never have thought anything like that to be possible, a machine with an electronic brain.

  I also remember back to when plumbing and electricity were first brought into this area and were made available for folks to have in their homes. When I was a youngster I didn’t have a need for it at all. I got by quite well without it, I figure. Of course, it sure did make living easier, and we thought we were finally modernized when it did come available. When I threw out the old scrub board and plugged in the wringer washing machine, I thought I’d died and gone to Heaven. What a convenience. And to have fresh running water from a tap. Wow! That was something special. Folks just can’t function without either of these nowadays. When a storm puts the hydro out, people panic. This modern world has made it impossible to do without it.

  Schooling is something else that has changed quite drastically over the years. I got all my education in a one-room school house. I walked there in the morning and home again when it was out for the day. I figure I got a good education for my time. I went to grade eight. That’s all that was required unless I had wanted to teach or be a nurse. Nowadays, you can’t get a job anywhere unless you have your grade twelve. Youngsters are spending years in college and university for a higher education today. Some can’t even find a job when they are done, and they have spent a small fortune trying to get educated.

  Don’t get me wrong. I think that it is important for everyone to have the opportunity to go to school and have a chance to pursue the career of their choosing. Money is a necessity and you need a job to earn it, and you need the right education to get the job. That’s just how it all is, but I feel there has been a lot of emphases put on education when a little bit of good old common sense would go a long way. That’s all some jobs require, along with an eagerness to work hard. No amount of formal education teaches those qualities. That comes from your rearing.

  Social etiquette has certainly changed with the passing of time. Manners don’t seem to be regarded with much importance anymore. No please’s or thank you’s or excuse me’s are offered. I feel entitlement has overshadowed politeness. Formalities seem to have gone to the wayside. We were taught to address our elders with ma’am or sir, or Mr. or Mrs. Now it’s first name basis. I was taught to respect my elders and address them accordingly. Ignorance to such issues was not tolerated to any extent. We were expected to dress in formal attire to attend church, weddings, funerals, and such. Now people show up in blue jeans and tee shirts. I find that a little disrespectful at times. I’m not saying that it’s wrong; it’s just hard to get used to.

  Attitudes in general have changed, though. Society has taken on such a high a sense of entitlement, especially the younger generations. People aren’t grateful for what they have and feel they deserve more and better. It seems it’s the way of the world. It’s hard for an old gal like me to understand. I was brought up in such different times. We were raised to earn what we needed and appreciate all we had and be thankful for it. It was just that simple. This modern world has become very materialistic. People just have too much stuff! With so much social media bombarding our senses, the retail industry has turned shopping into a social outing. It seems that if you want it, they sell it. There’s a gadget for everything, and people are willing to buy it, and with so much easy credit available they can. These are different times indeed.

  I do agree, though, that there have been some wonderful upgrades to our world in this last century that one cannot overlook and that we need to appreciate. Health care is one of them. Folks used to have to pay for all their doctoring. Lots of folks couldn’t afford medical help and either suffered needlessly or died, and that was a real shame. Working conditions and wages have become governed. Now people are treated more fairly, and employers can’t enforce unjust working hours or unsafe or unhealthy environments on their employees. Today’s governments have also found many ways to ensure that people can meet their needs. Even though the income tax system has many holes in it, it does provide our citizens with a way to maintain an acceptable standard of living. We do have a lot to be thankful for in such regards.

  The younger generations don’t recall the harder times, but I do. I lived them. And yet I look back with great fondness on the years of my youth. There was such a different air in society. Family, neighbours, and friends seemed to be held in a higher importance. We worked together and helped each other for the betterment of life in general. We respected and appreciated our possessions and those of others. We took pride in who we were and what we did, but we were never too proud. That’s how this northern land that we all love and hold so dear was built. We paved the way for all future generations with a lot of very hard work and a vision for a better future. Today’s youngsters call all that history and have no regard for the past. They live in the moment and are only concerned for today.

  I was born into the world at the end of the nineteenth century. I spent my youth and adult years in the twentieth century, and I shall end my years in the twenty-first century. There sure have been many changes in this world over my lifetime. Some of them I’ve embraced and enjoyed, and others I’ve had a hard time getting used to. I guess Ma and Pa must have wondered sometimes about this ever-changing world during their days, too. Time doesn’t stand still, nor does progress. That’s just the way of it. It’s been like that since the beginning of time and will be until the end. Acceptance and appreciation walk hand and hand many a time. I guess a body just has to go along with it, and go with the flow.”

  the hospital

  “Not long after all the whoopla and celebrations of welcoming in the new millennium, I turned one-hundred and three. Yes, another year older, and still going strong. Well, still going anyways I thought! I was still living in my own home making my own meals doing my own cleaning and looking after my own laundry. Frankly, I was still enjoying life on my own terms.

  The days seemed to come and go, and I always managed to fill them. I had made up my mind after Logan’s passing that I should try and accomplish at least one task each day. That way I would still feel productive and kept motivated. It was my daily goal no matter how menial the task may have seemed. It felt good knowing I had done something constructive to pass the time.

  The children often remarked that I should sell the house and move into an apartment in town or consider moving into the home for the aged, but I made it quite clear that when the time came that I had to, I would. But not yet. I just wasn’t ready yet, and maybe the “Home” wasn’t ready for me yet! Looking back, I’m not sure which way it was.”

  Beth laughed at that comment, “You’re right, Gran, it truly is remarkable that you were able to still be living in your own home at one-hundred and three. I haven’
t heard tell of anyone else who’s been able to accomplish that.”

  “Well, I was feeling pretty fortunate about my life and circumstances. I thought things were just fine, considering my age and all. Yep, I was doing right fine, till April first, that is. It was on that awful day that my circumstances were totally changed by a dreadful twist of fate. Mother Nature’s April fool’s joke, I guess.

  I was not prepared for the long-term repercussions of ill health. I had managed to put in one-hundred and three years residing in my own home, relying on my own means. I had come to appreciate the ideal of drifting off into slumber one night in the comfort of my own bed and not waking from eternal sleep with the morning light. Sounded like a good ending for an old gal such as me. Eva had managed to pull it off. I had only hoped I could, too, but my ideal ending was not to come to pass. I should have had a plan “B”, I guess. Anyway, it just goes to show you that you can’t predict the future.

  I never would have figured that a person could break a bone without a tumble or accident. I always thought you had to do something quite substantial, but now I know. I simply stood up to take my lunch dishes to the sink when a pain crippled me, and down I went. I had a fractured femur. I broke my hip just like that! Just that simple!

  Thank goodness someone in the parking lot at Ashton’s heard me hollering. Help came fast. Jacob was there in a hurry and called the ambulance. I was at the hospital within an hour. Most of that time is a bit of a blur to me. The pain was pretty overpowering. Worse than childbirth, I’d say. Thank goodness for morphine. Once they got that going, I finally got hold of my senses. Then reality set in. I knew I was in a real pickle. If they weren’t able to patch me up and get me going again, I knew I’d be spending my last days withering away in an old age home. Land sakes alive, that was a dreadful thought!