The Trust She Yields

by Jennifer Leeland

  "I'm glad you made it.” He took her arm in a firm grip and led her inside to the living room where about ten people, all dressed in leather and lace, stood chatting and laughing. They were obviously friends. The sight only brought pain to Lee's heart and made her more desperate than ever to escape.

  A woman with a long, black wig approached. “She's beautiful, David. Yours?” Her long fingernails slid along Lee's cheek.

  "She is. No touching, Pamela.” David's voice commanded respect, and Pamela immediately dropped her hand.

  "Interesting.” The woman's smile was mocking. “You've never been the possessive sort."

  "This is a special case."

  Training kicked in, and Lee lowered her gaze and shifted into a submissive stance. All the aggression she'd had at David's doorstep dissolved in a room filled with people she understood. She admitted, if only to herself, she'd missed this so much.

  But she wouldn't go back to it. Too much pain, too much drama.

  Without thinking, she flinched when David reached for her again. His hand dropped before he touched her. Instead, he said, “Come with me."

  She hesitated for a moment as he stepped toward a staircase.

  "He's completely safe.” Pamela's voice purred very near her ear and made her jump. “Whatever you're worried about, you don't have to worry about with him.” Lee shot a glance at the woman and found her dark eyes serious. “He would never hurt a sub. Never. You can believe that.” Pamela turned away abruptly and joined the group.

  With a tentative step, Lee climbed the stairs and discovered David waiting patiently at the top. When she reached the last step, he took her hand and walked her to a bedroom off the hallway.

  The room was lush with dark blue curtains and dark satin sheets. Candlelight flickered, creating shadows on bisque-colored walls. Everything was soft and gentle. After years of leather benches and wooden canes, none of this seemed real.

  She frowned and shook her head. How was David going to establish his dominance here?

  He dragged her toward a desk, and she sat in the chair he pulled out for her. On the desk was a stack of papers. “What are these?” She was well aware that she was not being the submissive she should be under these circumstances.

  "It's a questionnaire. Tonight, I want you to fill it out.” He stepped away and gave her space. Only seconds earlier, she'd wanted him to give her room, let her breathe. Now, she resented the lack of warmth from his removal.

  He opened a book and sat in one of the winged back chairs to read. For a moment, she stared at him. This wasn't like any Dom/sub thing she'd ever experienced. She frowned. What was he up to?

  She shrugged and studied the papers. It was more than the standard questions she'd come across before. It was much more detailed and clearly aimed at identifying danger zones. Most of the questions were a breeze. One, however, stopped her cold.

  Have you ever been beaten, sustained broken bones, or been whipped without your permission?

  The pen shook in her hand. She couldn't answer the question, so, she skipped it.

  More details. Did she like golden showers? No, not really. Anal play? Yes. On and on the questions went. Then, another question rocked her. Have you ever had your trust betrayed in a sexual relationship?

  She skipped that question, too.

  The last question requested she write down her ultimate sexual fantasy.

  She wrote three words and set the pen down.

  Without speaking, she handed the papers to David and sat back in the chair opposite him, unable to meet his gaze.

  * * * *

  The questions Lee left unanswered didn't surprise David at all. Every iota of her body language screamed that she'd been beaten, betrayed, and probably within the confines of a Dom/sub relationship. She understood the rules enough to deliberately break them but not be comfortable doing so. Even now, she sat with her hands clasped in her lap and her feet crossed like a child in a classroom.

  The last three words she'd written slashed his heart.

  To be normal.

  She'd been cowed, broken, and believed she was freak. This was nothing new to David. So many of his friends came to him this way. They felt different, ostracized, unwanted for who they really were.

  Lee's issues went beyond that. She was damaged within the lifestyle. He had his work cut out for him.

  "It's time for your punishment,” he stated, his voice soft but firm.

  Her head jerked up. “For what?"

  He ticked off her offenses on his fingers. “You did not follow me immediately when I told you to. You have spoken several times without permission. You have not assumed a submissive stance in my presence.” These were all rules she would know, and it was clear she had broken them on purpose.

  "I never agreed to this.” Her voice wobbled, defiant but lacking conviction.

  "You showed up,” he pointed out. Yes, he knew she'd consciously come to tell him she wasn't going to participate in a thirty day trial, but subconsciously, she needed this, craved this.

  "But—” Tears threatened to spill, and her hands twisted in her lap. “I can't. I won't.” She bit her lip.

  He didn't answer. Instead, he stood and pointed at his feet. She would or she wouldn't. It was her first test.

  Reluctance and defiance stiffened every one of her muscles. He held her gaze for several minutes until she finally dropped hers. Awkwardly, as if out of practice, she stood then knelt in front of him, her head lowered, her hands clasped behind her back.

  He caressed her neck with a gentle slide of his fingers. “Good girl,” he murmured but immediately removed his touch when she leaned toward his hand.

  She trembled, and he knew she wanted to run from the room, escape him and the power he held. He had to show her true punishment, not the kind she'd been shown thus far.

  Stepping around Lee, he studied her. The straps of the halter top didn't hide the scars on her back. But many in the lifestyle had scars they were proud of, so that was no indication of abuse. The long jagged slice at her arm pit, however, didn't look like part of the usual BDSM play. The answers to her questions did not indicate she liked cutting or anything like that. Where had this scar come from?

  "Stand and take your panties off,” he commanded. Like every other time, she hesitated. He shook his head. “You keep storing up more punishment."

  Her whimper cut through him like a knife. She was terrified, but she stood and took off her underwear. She bent to remove her boots, but he stopped her. “Leave the boots on."

  She was glorious. Curved, tall and toned—she was like Athena, like a warrior. Yet, something called to him, reached out to him as a submissive would to a dominant. Her appearance was deceiving. What she wanted was someone to rule her, control her. The control she would gain in return was even greater, though she didn't know that yet.

  "I want you to lie on the bed, your legs spread open.” He strode to a cabinet and opened the cupboard door. Inside were all his toys, his tools. He selected the perfect vibrator for her. It was designed to give the ultimate pleasure in the least amount of time. He intended to torture her with it.

  She had obeyed him, with her hands near the headboard as if she expected him to restrain her. He wasn't going to do that tonight. He wanted her to be free of any restraints but her own.

  Her eyes blinked rapidly, and her body was stiff. Fear was overwhelming her. The word “punishment” had come to mean something unpleasant. David's first task was to change that.

  "Are you ready for your punishment?” Focused on her, he ignored the strain of his erection and the heat in his veins. He exerted calm over his breathing and his pulse. It was imperative to keep his raging desire under control.

  She shivered and closed her eyes. As he approached, she stiffened even more. With a gentle hand, he stroked her neck and moved downward. The halter top unzipped in the front, and he revealed her lush breasts inch by inch until the material dropped away. His fingers brushed her dusky nipples, and they responded insta
ntly to his touch. Her breath came fast as he rolled one distended bud and then the other between his fingers. A flush spread over her skin. Desire was beautiful on Lee Sidle.

  His fingers traveled lower and lifted the hem of her skirt. They danced over her thighs to her pussy and sought the nub just above her damp lips to stroke it. He flicked her clit, then pressed down with his thumb, reveling in her low cry. He removed his hand, and she whimpered in protest. Her head rolled back and forth, and her back arched. He clicked the vibrator on and the buzz made her go still. Her eyes flew open. The fear had returned and robbed her skin of its gorgeous flush.

  David gritted his teeth, wanting to kill whoever had tormented and abused her. As a man who had heard many dark and ugly stories, he couldn't afford the rage that filled him at the moment. He shoved it down and focused on changing her fear to lust.

  The vibrating end of the dildo pressed on her clit, and her eyes fluttered to half mast. The dildo slipped into her slick channel. She didn't move.

  To hide the outrage he felt, David dipped his head and flicked his tongue over her clit where the vibrating tongs of the dildo rested.

  She arched her back and cried out. “What are you doing?"

  "I'm punishing you."

  "But ... that's not...” She moaned, and her hips thrust toward his mouth. “Oh God,” she gasped and fresh fluid gushed from her pussy.

  Just when she was about to go over the edge, he stopped. He slid the dildo from her soaked tunnel and loomed over her, hands braced on either side of her head.

  "No. Oh please. Please let me come. Get me off."

  "This is punishment, Lee.” His tongue grazed her lips. “To want, to need, but not be able to have it."

  Damn, she tested his control. The taste of her cum, the dazed expression on her face, the heat of her skin combined to tempt him in ways he never thought possible. He wanted to slide his dick inside her, watch her face as he did, and know every twitch, every tremble, when she came. Who was truly being punished here?

  She stared at him, confusion in her hazel eyes.

  "You will not come.” Adjusting his weight to one hand, he stroked her hair with the other. “Not until you know what true punishment is. Not until you trust enough to be who you truly are."

  Her lower lip quivered, but defiance replaced the dazed expression in her eyes. She thrust her chin up. “I'll just get myself off."

  He smiled. “Then I'll punish you more. You and I both know a dildo, a vibrator, even another man, won't do for you what I will."

  "You're crazy.” She glared up at him, cocky and defiant.

  "Perhaps.” He slid off the bed and picked up her panties to hand them to her. “But if you want to know what a true Dominant/submissive relationship can be, come back tomorrow night.” He strode toward the door. “Or you can continue to live in fear. It's your choice."

  "Wait!” She staggered to her feet as he started to twist the knob. “I don't understand."

  She sounded so helpless, so confused, his heart ached for her. “I know. Come back tomorrow night. Be a good girl, and I won't punish you anymore."

  Leaving the room at this moment was one of the hardest things he had ever done. He could have had Lee in his bed, but she wouldn't be whole. She'd be a ghost, only half a person. And David wanted all of her.

  * * * *

  What the fuck had just happened?

  Stunned, Lee stared at the door that closed behind David. He'd left her unfulfilled, yet unharmed. Punishment to Barry had meant pain. Not the good kind that went along with pleasure. The kind of pain that left her broken and bleeding on the floor. To break any of the many rules of submission was to risk a whipping.

  She shivered. To all the others in her BDSM community, Barry had been charming, exemplary, the perfect dom. It wasn't until he'd broken her arm and battered her face that any of her friends saw what was going on. Considering she'd never gone to the emergency room for any of the horrible beatings, that was understandable. But when he sliced her open with a knife, she'd had no choice.

  The hospital had reported Barry, and she'd been “punished” for that. Her broken arm had healed, but the fear he'd instilled never had.

  Her hands shook as she slid her underwear back on and zipped up the halter top. All the warmth of desire David had brought her disappeared as the memories flooded back. Damaged, she was a burden to those who loved her. The community couldn't love her and Barry both. She didn't give them the chance to choose, afraid they would, despite his betrayals, choose him.

  Now, David was offering to rebuild her confidence, her trust. Already, he'd shown more control than Barry ever thought of having.

  The man's version of “punishment” was just as effective but didn't hurt her physically. She ached for him, but she wasn't destroyed by it. Barry liked all pain, emotional and physical. He used her desire against her at every opportunity. David wanted her compliance freely given.

  Or he seemed to.

  Could she really give herself to him for thirty days? She almost hadn't survived Barry's domination.

  Dressed and thoughtful, Lee stepped into the hall and back downstairs. Surprisingly, she'd only been upstairs for an hour, yet it felt like an eternity had passed. The party seemed to have moved to the basement. She could hear the telltale moans and couldn't help herself. She followed them.

  Here was a comfortable scene. The whips on the wall, the leather bench, St. Andrew's Cross were all accoutrements with which she was accustomed. The play being enacted was also achingly familiar.

  Pamela was topping a male and a female, both blonde, who were on all fours in front of her. She held a whip with several long strands and whipped the bare asses of her submissives with one strike. In another area, a man had a masked woman strapped to the St. Andrew's cross, and he used a glove with sharp spikes to caress her skin. The woman writhed, and her moans were muffled through the mask.

  The smell of sweat and heady arousal assaulted her nostrils. David was not playing anyone. He sat quietly on a chair with his hands in his lap, but his gaze remained intent on all the action in the room. When the heel of her boot sounded on the bottom step, however, those gray lasers zeroed in on her as if she were the only person in the room.

  Something electric and mystifying passed between them.

  Mesmerized, she drifted toward him. He waved a hand over his lap. “Face down, Lee."

  She could refuse him. He would punish her, but she could say no. Yet the idea of lying across his thighs made her hot and needy. Without another thought, she did it. Her ass was in the air and his cock was pressed into her belly as he shifted for both their comfort.

  "I'm going to finish punishing you, Lee.” His voice was so sexy and low, and her pussy throbbed at the sound, no longer afraid of the word “punishment.” When David said it, she wanted it.

  His hand slid up her thigh and moved her skirt upward, inch by inch, excruciatingly slowly. He rubbed a hand over her bare flesh and slid her underwear down. She arched toward his hand, wanting him to thrust his fingers inside her.

  "No, Lee. This is a continuation of your punishment.” The palm of his hand connected with her ass. Hard. She jerked as fire spread along her cheeks. Again, his hand struck her. And again.

  It should have frightened her. She shouldn't have been turned on by it. But the pain from his spanking, added to the feel of his cock through his pants, made her hot and wet. He increased the frequency, and the pain changed from a dull, hard pain to a sharp, intense one. She was so close to orgasm, it hurt.

  He stopped and she whimpered. His hand stroked her inflamed skin with soft touches she didn't want. She wanted him to keep spanking her until she came.

  "No. Not this time,” he answered, and she realized she'd spoken out loud.

  "I'm sorry, sir. I shouldn't have spoken.” How easily the title slipped from her lips again.

  He stroked her ass and the back of her thighs as she trembled. “I will forgive you that infraction. This time."

  His ha
nds were magic, and she wanted it to go on and on, but he placed them under her arms and lifted her to her feet then stood to face her. “Tomorrow night I will have a contract ready. You must think about this, Lee. But not now. You can stay here tonight if you wish."

  She searched his expression for a hidden agenda and found none. He meant it, and he wouldn't touch her if she did. “I'll go home tonight. What time should I be here tomorrow?"

  "Noon.” His expression was hard to read. “Don't be late."

  He turned on his heel abruptly and climbed the stairs.

  "Wow.” A woman sighed behind her, and suddenly, Lee realized they'd had an audience.

  The man who had been playing the masked woman smiled. “That's why he's the master Dom. He's very good."

  "He never spanked me like that.” The little blonde woman's eyebrows shot up, and she studied Lee. “Lucky, lucky you.” There was no jealousy in her tone. Envy, yes, but Lee got the impression the woman was happy for her.

  "The show is over, Stephanie,” Pamela spoke sharply. “It's time for you to take your medicine."

  The sensual smile on Stephanie's lips was reflected in Pamela's, and the petite woman scrambled on all fours. “Yes, ma'am."

  Lee mounted the stairs slowly. She had a lot to think about.

  * * * *

  David paced with a drink in his hand. Lee had slipped out the door, bemused, flushed, desirable. And he had to resist the urge to force her to stay. A master of the game, he shouldn't be this unsteady and disturbed. He tossed back the drink. No woman, no submissive, strained his control the way this one did.

  When he'd left her in the bedroom, he wasn't supposed to touch her again. Yet, when she appeared in the dungeon with a hungry, needy expression on her face, he couldn't resist his need to spank her beautiful ass. He didn't know her past and it could have freaked her out, but he'd gone on instinct rather than logic.

  It was so unlike him that, when the spanking was over, he practically ran from the room.

  "Frustrating, isn't it?” Justin appeared in the doorway to the basement and strode into the living room.