Imitation of Love

by Sally Quilford

  “But I won’t be able to look after you as I wanted to,” said Alyssa, breaking into Catherine’s reverie.

  “Forget me, and think of being happy. I’m sure Mr. Oakley won’t let me starve.” Catherine spoke with a certainty she didn’t really feel. Once she’d confessed all to him, he might well do that. She was wise enough to know that men could forgive sins in other men that they would not accept in a woman.

  She lay awake whilst Alyssa slept, waiting for the sound of Mr. Oakley returning. When she heard hooves on the ground outside, she dressed quickly and went downstairs, bracing herself for the battle ahead.

  Chapter Six

  She found him in his study, sitting behind his desk in the dim candlelight. In front of him was a platter of food he hadn’t touched, and a glass of brandy.

  “I hear you have a new maid,” he said, gesturing to a seat opposite him.

  “Erm … yes, I thought Kitty would be a good maid and I need one for London and…” She was tempted to tell him about Mrs. Somerson, but her feelings for him prevented her. She was forced to admit that she might not have entirely pure reasons for lowering Phoebe in his estimation. “I hope that’s acceptable to you.”

  “Nothing happens in Oakley Castle without my learning of it,” he said, “so I’m aware of the … scene … today. Griffiths was quite emphatic that nothing like that ever happens to one of the servants again. I quite agree with him that Mrs. Somerson’s behaviour was scandalous. You have my assurance that neither Kitty, the staff here, or staff in any of my other houses will be subjected to such treatment again.”

  Was he telling her that he had no intentions of marrying Mrs. Somerson? Her heart felt lighter briefly, but then she wondered whether he just planned to extract a promise from the lady that she would not abuse the servants again.

  “Thank you. But that is not why I came to speak to you.”

  “Is this where you tell me how you’ve unearthed my brilliant disguise?” he said, sardonically. “Because I can assure you that there’s a young man in London more than happy to swear that I dueled with him last night.”

  “It is not about the Captain. At least not yet. It’s about Alyssa and Mr. Harrington.”

  “Yes, I’m aware of their growing feelings for each other. I’d have to be blind not to see it. But you’re the one who wanted your sister to marry a rich man.”

  “Only so she’d be properly cared for. But I’m sure Harrington will take care of her.”

  “He’s broke.”

  “Only in relative terms, I’m sure.”

  “I’m sorry, but my duty is to ensure both you and your sister marry well. As your legal guardian, I cannot give my permission to Andrew and Alyssa, as much as I too would be happy to see them marry.”

  “About that…”

  “What?”

  “This is where we start talking about the Captain.”

  “Blackmail won’t work, Catherine. I’ve already told you that there’s a young man in London willing to swear we dueled last night.”

  “I’m not trying to blackmail you. I’m trying to release you from your promise.”

  “Explain?” His eyes pierced into her, but there was something else in them. A wariness. “On second thoughts. Don’t. There may be some things it’s better I don’t know.”

  “I have to tell you. If only because I misjudged you. I thought you were a dandy. Someone only devoted to pleasure. And I was wrong.”

  “What has this got to do with my being your guardian?”

  “Everything. But I have to go back to the beginning. To when Jimmy used to get notes from father, excusing him from lessons at school.”

  “There are some things I do not need to know.” Mr. Oakley spoke sternly. “Go back to bed, Catherine.”

  “No. You have to listen to me. When I told you I didn’t know the false names of the people who killed Jimmy, I lied.”

  “What were their names?” His question was like a pistol shot.

  “The names on the forged documents were Annette and Paulette Du Pont.”

  “Women? What type of documents were they? This is very important.”

  “They were letters of introduction.”

  “For France?”

  She shook her head. “No, for passage to America. The letters stated that the two women were of impeccable character and had escaped from the guillotine, and that they were to be given safe passage to America. It promised that the costs would be met by the writer of the letter. The signature was that of a French nobleman.” She named the nobleman in question.

  Mr. Oakley stood up and started pacing the room. “I know the man,” he said. “He’s an exile here in England and he has done a similar service to those escaping from the revolution in the past so it wouldn’t raise any eyebrows. He has a very strict procedure for helping people, which is probably why they needed the forgeries. I imagine that by the time the accounts are put before him, the women will be well on their way to America, if not there already. But why would they need false names?”

  “I don’t know, but they assured Jimmy it was for a noble cause,” Catherine said, fearing his anger. “He told me just before he died, when I was worried about it, that the request for the letters came from an impeccable source.”

  “I can’t understand why Jimmy would be so trusting. He was always so careful. So it must be someone we know. Someone who seemed beyond reproach in his eyes. Thank you for telling me. Now I want you to go to bed and put all this out of your mind.”

  “I have not finished yet.”

  “You have more information?”

  “Not exactly. I just need to tell you something. Jimmy was not the one who forged the notes.”

  Oakley’s voice became wary again. “Think carefully before you speak, Catherine.”

  “I must tell you. It was not Jimmy who wrote those notes to get out of lessons. It was me. And it wasn’t Jimmy who forged documents for the Captain, it was me. Jimmy has never been very good at art. In fact he barely wrote anything unless he had to. He realized when I was twelve that I had a talent for copying artists, and at first we just did it as a joke.”

  “I don’t want to know any of this.” Despite his words, Catherine guessed that he had known if not from the beginning, then for some time. “In fact, I refuse to believe it. A woman couldn’t possibly be capable of such subterfuge.”

  “Why, because we’re all sweet, helpless little things who wouldn’t so much as strike a servant?”

  “Go to bed, Catherine.”

  “I haven’t finished.”

  “Dear Lord, woman, do you intend to keep me up all night? I thought you weren’t a prattler.”

  “I told you that I misjudged you.”

  “Oh, well then I accept your apology.” He waved his hand dismissively. “There’s no need to discuss this any further.”

  “So when Jimmy died I was angry with you, because if he had not wanted to buy a horse to ride in your steeplechase, he wouldn’t have taken on the new work. It was not Jimmy who wrote asking you to be our guardian. It was me.”

  “You forged that document too?”

  “Yes.”

  “Well, you’re a real mistress of the art, aren’t you?”

  “I wanted to be sure Alyssa was cared for. But now I know you. Now I know how kind, brave and noble you are, I don’t want to deceive you any longer. So I absolve you of your promise. Alyssa can marry Harrington, and I can…”

  “What? Become a forger?” He raised a sardonic eyebrow.

  “I thought that perhaps the Captain, who has always been happy with my work in the past, might…”

  “Over my dead body! You will never forge anything again, Catherine. Do you hear?”

  “But you’re not my guardian.” Catherine stood up, determined to make her point. “You can’t tell me what to do!”

  “On the contrary I have a letter from your brother that says otherwise, and whether I have a legal obligation, I still consider I have a moral obligation to care for y
ou and Alyssa.”

  “But I’ve told you. It’s a fake.”

  “Shall we test that with the magistrate, Catherine?”

  “I’d be sent to prison… They’d hang me.” Catherine felt her knees start to tremble. “Oh … I know what you’re trying to do, and it’s wonderful of you…”

  “Please,” he held up his hand to stop her. “Don’t get any romantic notions about why I’m doing this. I should throw you in the gutter, but I don’t believe your sister, who I am sure is innocent of this crime, should suffer for your actions. So I will continue with my task of introducing you both to society, and hope to God I find you a husband who doesn’t find out about your past.”

  Catherine’s hands flew to her face in horror, as tears started to fall. She had expected him to be angry, and justifiably so, but not this. After all, had she not helped him when he was the Captain? And had he not been grateful for that help when he believed it came from Jimmy? But, of course, there were the double standards she had considered before. She just had not expected to be faced with the hypocrisy quite so brutally.

  He stepped forward with his arm stretched out, and for a horrible moment she thought he might strike her. She shrunk back. “I only did it for Alyssa,” she whispered. “That’s why I didn’t want new dresses or anything for myself.”

  “I er …” Mr. Oakley’s voice sounded constricted, and his hand fell to his side. “I will give Alyssa until the end of the Season, just to be sure she doesn’t fall in love with the next young man who tells her she’s beautiful. You must accept that is a possibility, and it is only right that we wait. If by that time she’s still in love with Harrington, and he with her, I shall settle enough money on her so that they might at least live in comfort.”

  “Thank you.” Catherine turned and fled, vaguely noticing as she stumbled up the stairs that Mrs. Somerson’s maid was lurking in one of the corners.

  ***

  “You were a bit harsh on Miss Willoughby, old man,” said Harrington as he and Xander travelled by phaeton to London the following morning. “In fact, if I’d been there I might have called you out. If not for her expertise, the Captain and his band might have been arrested by the French a long time ago.”

  Though Xander did not like to talk about his private feelings, the events of the night before disturbed him so much he told Andrew some of what had happened. He could still see Catherine’s stricken expression as he insulted her. He had only reached out his hand to comfort her, ashamed with himself for hurting her, only to see her shrink back, as if she thought he was going to hit her. It left a deep shame burning within him. But he told himself it was for the best. He had hopefully killed two birds with one stone. She could not possibly hero worship him now. Not after he had been so unkind. The thought was like a sword piercing his heart, but he kept telling himself it was for the best.

  “I know, Andrew,” said Xander. “I’d have probably let you win the duel. But don’t you see that I had to make sure she never does it again?” His lips were set in a grim line as he explained the other reason for his harshness. “Whether Jimmy wrote that letter about guardianship or not, I owe it to him to protect her. Damn it, Andrew, if she’s the one who’s been helping us these past two years, I owe it to her. Jimmy was fooled by someone telling him that they had a noble cause, and he’d been taught to be very careful. Who knows what danger she might get herself into if she tried to make her living in such a way? She has no idea who to trust, and as a woman in this difficult world she’s even more vulnerable than Jimmy was. I had to let her believe it was reprehensible.”

  “Thank God the crooks who wanted the forged documents aren’t aware that she knows the names, or that she’s the one who did the forgeries,” said Andrew.

  “It doesn’t bear thinking about. It cost him his life, but at least Jimmy protected her up to the end. “

  “Do you really think they might be something to do with the intelligence from France? About the attempt on the king’s life?”

  Xander nodded. “I’m sure of it. The trouble is finding them before the day. It might be too late once they’re in amongst the crowd.”

  “Did you ever suspect it might not be Jimmy doing the forgeries, Xander?”

  “Not at first. Then I saw Miss Willoughby’s painting, and she’s good. Very good. It also reminded me that I’d never seen Jimmy so much as doodle. I didn’t know about the guardianship letter, though I suppose I ought to have suspected, with it coming at the same time as the announcement of his death.”

  “Are you really angry with her about that?”

  “No.” Xander smiled. “It was a very sensible and clever thing to do. And as I’ve said, I do have a moral obligation to help Jimmy’s family. Just as I have the same obligation to see you and Alyssa happy.”

  “Thank you for that.”

  “You realize you might lose her, Andrew. She’s still very young.”

  “I know. I’m prepared for that. Or at least that’s what I keep telling myself. What about you, Xander?”

  “What about me?” Xander stiffened.

  “You’re not going to marry Phoebe, are you?”

  “No! Even if she hadn’t struck Kitty, I’d already made up my mind that Phoebe was not meant to be Mrs. Oakley.”

  “Do you have anyone else in mind?”

  “No. No one at all.” Xander urged the horses on, speeding up the phaeton and making it clear that the subject was closed.

  ***

  “Is it true?” Alyssa danced around Catherine’s bedroom as sunlight streamed through the windows. “Did Mr. Oakley really say that?”

  “Yes.” Catherine forced a smile, wanting to be happy for her sister. “You just have to promise me you won’t fall in love with someone else with no money. I don’t think he’d be as generous for anyone but Harrington.”

  “I’ll never love anyone else. And if Mr. Oakley settles enough money on me, then you can come and live with us.” Alyssa grabbed Catherine around the waist and spun her around.

  “I think … I think I may find somewhere else to live,” said Catherine.

  “Why? Don’t you want to be with me?”

  “Of course I do, but I’ve a feeling you and Harrington will prefer to be very much alone.”

  The truth, that Catherine didn’t want to admit to Alyssa, was that Mr. Oakley would probably be a regular guest at their home, and Catherine knew beyond a doubt that she had to go somewhere she never had to see him again. Her love for him was too deep, and the pain his angry words caused too raw. She only hoped she could get through the Season and Alyssa and Andrew’s wedding without making a fool of herself in his company. The good thing was that it was unlikely she’d have to be alone with him. Or that he’d even want to be alone with her, which caused her even more pain, despite knowing it was for the best.

  “What’s happened, darling?” asked Alyssa. “I know you’re unhappy. I can tell.”

  “I’m not. I’m very happy for you.”

  “You think I don’t notice things, but I do. I’ve seen the way you look at Mr. Oakley.” Alyssa caressed her sister’s cheek.

  “Please, Alyssa, don’t ask me anything. I can’t … I can’t …” Catherine was saved by Kitty knocking the door and entering the room.

  “Sorry to interrupt, Miss Willoughby, I just brought back your gown. I’ve darned the hem and it’s as good as new.”

  “Thank you, Kitty. Will you put it away?”

  “Yes, Miss Willoughby.” Kitty looked excited about something.

  “What’s happened?” asked Catherine.

  “Oh, Miss Willoughby, I shouldn’t gossip I know, but there’s been all sorts going on this morning. Mrs. Somerson has just left. Mr. Griffiths says good riddance to bad rubbish, which I know he shouldn’t. Anyway, she caused such a fuss, screaming and shouting at everyone that she wouldn’t set foot in this … I can’t say the word she used then, it’s blasphemous… place again. Then, would you believe her maid, Celine, steps forward and slaps her on the
face? Then Celine says ‘you’ve ruined everything’.”