Saving Madeline

by Rachel Ann Nunes

  “Let’s go. I’ll help search.” He nodded toward the gearshift.

  Hesitating, Caitlin blinked slowly, her lashes leaving delicate shadows under her eyes. “Your truck,” she began.

  “It’s not going anywhere.”

  “I could call you a cab.”

  He waved the suggestion aside. “Your sister’s only five, right?” he said, remembering at last what little she’d said on the trip from Manti. How horrible and terribly ironic that her sister had gone missing when she had been instrumental in making him turn over Madeline. What if Amy had been kidnapped?

  “Well, sort of.”

  “You can tell me on the way.”

  She put the car into reverse and didn’t speak again until they were at the stoplight on the main road. “Amy is only five or six—at least in her mind. On the outside, she’s twenty-seven.” She waited a moment for him to digest the information and then continued. “They don’t know why it happened. Maybe the birth itself.” She shook her head. “You can tell when she talks, but well, just looking at her you might not notice anything.”

  Which explained why Caitlin wasn’t as worried about a possible kidnapping, though there was still a lot that could go wrong with a full-grown woman who was mentally handicapped.

  He sensed a waiting about her, and unsure what she wanted or needed, he said, “We’ll find her.” She nodded, her lips pursed and her face tight with worry.

  The baby-sitter was a sturdy older woman with white hair, who burst from the house as they pulled into the driveway. Both Caitlin and Parker jumped from the car and met her on the walkway.

  “Oh, Caitlin, I’m so sorry! She heard me talking to you on the phone about being late, and she was pouting. You know how she gets. Neither Kyle nor I saw her leave. She was sneaky about it.”

  Caitlin patted the woman’s shoulder. “It’s not your fault, Sarah. I told you about last summer and how she used to disappear.”

  “But she hates being out in the cold. She took her coat, at least, thank goodness. And I called you the minute I knew she wasn’t in the house.”

  “Then she couldn’t have gone far.” Caitlin scanned the street.

  “I’ll go that way,” Parker said, motioning one way with his head. “You go the other. We’ll knock on doors and ask people to search their own houses and yards. If we don’t find her on this street, you’d better take Detective Crumb up on her offer. It’s getting colder by the minute.”

  “Okay.”

  “I’ll go inside and call everyone I know,” the sitter added.

  At the first two houses, Parker talked to the people living there. All were extremely helpful. “If you find her on your property, please let us know,” he urged.

  “We’ll help you after we look here,” he was told at each house. Parker felt an odd lump in his throat at their concern. Caitlin had chosen a wonderful neighborhood to live in.

  The next house was empty, but he searched the yard anyway. Dusk was quickly approaching; he’d have to find a flashlight soon. He could hear people shouting Amy’s name as neighbors joined the hunt. In the backyard of the fourth house, which was also empty, he spied a playhouse complete with a balcony, slide, swing, and a sandbox underneath that would probably be attractive in the summer but now looked dark, deserted, and unfriendly. He realized he was thinking like an adult who knew the floors would be cold, the inside dark, and the furniture dirty. But Madeline wouldn’t think such things. She’d be excited to have a little house all her own, and she would try to make it as comfortable as possible. Besides, though it was almost dark now, it hadn’t been when Amy left the sitter’s.

  “Amy?” he called.

  No response. It had been a long shot anyway. He was about to leave for the next house, but thoughts of Madeline stopped him. Madeline loved to play hide and seek; maybe Amy did, too. He’d take a peek inside and be on his way. Zipping his coat against the ever-increasing cold, he approached the little playhouse and climbed the stairs to the deck. One way led to the door of the house, the other to the slide. From his vantage point on the deck, he could see a glow coming from the house. “Amy? I’m a friend of your sister’s, and we came to get you. Are you here?”

  No response, but he heard a rustling inside the playhouse. “Amy?” He peeked in and saw a woman sitting on a blanket. Even in the dim light he could make out her red hair. She was bigger than Caitlin, in both height and weight, but there was an obvious family resemblance in the lines of her face. “There you are.”

  “I’m a bird and this is my nest,” she said in a little girl voice.

  He took a few steps inside, ducking his head so he wouldn’t hit the ceiling. There was a second floor to the house, he saw, a loft really, and he was glad Amy hadn’t climbed up there. There wasn’t a safety rail and she might have fallen.

  “A bird,” he said conversationally. “What kind of a bird?”

  “One that flies.” Amy hesitated. “I’m not supposed to talk to strangers without Caitlin around.”

  Parker squatted down next to the woman, who regarded him with suspicion. “Then we’d better go find Caitlin. She’s really worried about you.”

  “Good. She was late. Again.” Amy stuck out her lower lip, the quintessential pouting child.

  “I wasn’t worried about you,” Parker added.

  Amy tilted her head. “You weren’t?”

  “Not if you can fly. If anything bad came, you’d just fly away.”

  She nodded vigorously. “That’s right. I can fly. Are you a bird, too?”

  “Sometimes. At least when my little girl wants me to be.”

  “You’re a dad?”

  “Yes.”

  “Oh.” She sounded disappointed.

  “Is that a bad thing?”

  Amy shrugged. “I want a baby for Caitlin so I can play with it. And then maybe Caitlin wouldn’t work so much. But if you’re a dad, you have a family.”

  “Part of one anyway. But I’m not married right now.” Parker wondered why he cared that she knew. “I’m divorced.”

  Amy’s brow gathered. “Divorced? Is that where people decide they don’t love each other anymore and go live in different houses?” When he nodded, she added, “That’s sad.”

  “Sometimes it’s necessary. But we never divorce our children. We keep on loving them and taking care of them forever and ever.”

  Amy laughed. “Of course.”

  “So, should we go find Caitlin?”

  “Not until we have our tea.” Amy reached over for a pretend pot and poured into a pretend cup. She did the same for him.

  Parker sat on the wood floor Indian-style and reached for the make-believe cup, sipping rather noisily.

  “No,” Amy said. “You have to hold out your little finger like this.” She demonstrated.

  “I didn’t know that. I’ll have to tell my daughter.”

  “Caitlin taught me. We always do it like this.”

  Parker had a hard time imagining his proper attorney sitting down to make-believe tea, but he liked the picture. It reminded him of how soft she’d been around Madeline. How alive and passionate about her work. He felt his attraction for her grow at the thought, but he immediately squashed the idea of any romantic involvement. She lived in a completely different world. Besides, he wasn’t ready for another relationship with a woman. Any woman.

  “I didn’t know birds could drink tea,” he said.

  “I have powers. Kind of like magic.”

  “That’s very handy.”

  “Yes, I have hands and feathers.”

  “What else can you do?”

  “I can fly, and I can . . .” She paused, considering. “Well, do other stuff I don’t know yet.”

  “See through metal? Make people tell the truth?” Madeline had often used these ideas in her play.

  “Yes,” she agreed. “Would you like some more tea?”

  “Sure. Hit me again. But then I really have to go find your sister.”

  “Would you like to have
a baby with her?”

  Parker smiled at her innocence. He’d already ruled out the notion of pursuing any kind of a romantic relationship with Caitlin, but maybe if they’d met under another circumstance, he might have acted on his attraction and asked her out. Maybe. Regardless, this situation was what it was, and he couldn’t afford to alienate his court-appointed attorney. Besides, what could she possibly see in him? Over the past few years, he’d gained a respect for women like her. Women who kept their promises and who didn’t use others.

  Yet how did he know this about her? He didn’t, not really, but the fact that she took her responsibility toward Amy seriously told him far more than she probably wanted him to know. She was a good person. He knew what it took to be a responsible parent, and it wasn’t easy.

  “I’m ready,” Amy announced. She turned out her light and set it in an alcove. “Ooh, it’s dark. Scary.”

  “It’ll be a bit lighter outside,” he said, coming to his feet. “I’ll help you.”

  “Okay.” Suddenly her hand was thrust into his, and she held on with a grip that was far stronger than Madeline’s had ever been.

  He led her to the door and outside, where the light had faded completely. “I’ve been gone all day,” Amy said with wonder. “It’s dark now.”

  “It gets dark fast in the winter. And cold. That’s why you should never leave without telling someone where you’re going. You might get lost.”

  “No, I won’t.” But she stepped closer to him as they left the stairs. She still gripped his hand tightly. Parker felt odd walking around with this woman-child holding his hand. Yet he didn’t let go or pull away. For all her twenty-seven years, Amy was still a child. He would want Caitlin to offer support to Madeline in the same way, if the situation had been reversed.

  They were spotted almost immediately as they rounded the front yard of the house. “They found her!” a teen shouted and pulled out a cell phone to begin texting others the good news. He could still hear shouts of Amy’s name in the distance, but gradually these ceased as the news spread. Parker and Amy were nearly back to the sitter’s when Caitlin came running down the street as fast as her high heels allowed. She slowed as she reached them.

  “Amy, where have you been?” Caitlin’s eyes went to their linked hands, but Amy was already pulling away and launching herself at her sister.

  “I was a bird in a nest, so I could have just flown away and not get hurt. And then we had tea.” Amy pointed at him. “He drank two cups, and I had three. Then it got dark, but he saved me from monsters.”

  “His name is Parker,” Caitlin said, hugging her sister. “And you can’t leave like that. I was so scared!”

  Amy looked appropriately chastened, though Parker thought he saw a mischievous smile touch her lips for the briefest of moments. “I’m sorry, Caitlin. I didn’t want you to work late. I was missing you today.”

  “Well, I’m here now. But I still have to take Parker into Salt Lake to get his truck.”

  “Can I go?”

  Caitlin sighed. “Yes.” Her eyes met Parker’s. “Thank you.”

  “I’m glad we found her.”

  “Oh, Caitlin, I just remembered something very, very important,” Amy said, tugging on Caitlin’s arm.”

  “What’s that?”

  “Parker isn’t married anymore, so he can still have a baby with you.”

  Caitlin’s eyes opened so wide that Parker had to grin. “Amy,” she groaned. “Sorry about that,” she added to Parker. “She’s got a thing about babies lately.”

  “Well, technically, she’s right,” he had to say, wishing it wasn’t so dark and cold so he could see if she was blushing. Her freckles did seem to be standing out a bit more prominently.

  Her mouth opened, but nothing came out. She seemed both surprised and confused. The urge to pull her to him took him by surprise. What was he thinking? Teasing her was one thing, touching her was another. He might not be able to stop.

  People were converging upon them now, everyone happy that Amy had been found. White clouds of warm breath filled the cold air.

  “Thank you,” Caitlin said at least a dozen times.

  Parker backed to the edge of the small crowd and watched them talk and eventually disperse. Amy enjoyed the attention, while Caitlin seemed only to endure it, though he was sure that wouldn’t be obvious to anyone there. She was complete grace.

  Stop, he told himself. He turned and walked back to Caitlin’s car. His hands and face felt numb from the cold, and for once he was glad of it. Numb made things hurt less. There was so much he couldn’t have. Madeline, a normal life. He had to hope Caitlin could make it all possible for him. Maybe.

  Caitlin and Amy caught up to him as he reached the door. “I’ll just call Sally,” Caitlin said. “There’s probably still time to get your truck.”

  He nodded and opened the front passenger door for Amy, who was at his elbow, looking up at him with a child’s worship. She reminded him of Madeline. Where was his daughter now? Was Dakota taking care of her? Was she safe?

  Helpless. He hated feeling that way. It made him desperate.

  Caitlin was talking on the phone, and from the expression on her face, it wasn’t good news. “Sorry,” she said when she’d disconnected. “Sally says they’re all closed up. We’ll have to get it first thing in the morning. She can have someone get us in by seven.”

  That meant he was stuck without transportation, but at least he had his clothes and a bit of cash. “Is there a motel around here? Someplace with a restaurant close?”

  “Oh, that’s right. You didn’t have lunch. You must be starving.”

  His stomach growled at even the mention of food, though he’d eaten four donuts that afternoon. “I could eat a horse.”

  “Look, the least I can do is feed you.”

  “It’s okay. You’ve got to take care of Amy.”

  “We’ll go to my house. Amy will love having you.”

  He was curious to see where she lived, to see her in her own private environment, but surely there were rules against consorting with your clients. Being with her was proving both difficult and tempting. “Okay, if it’s no bother,” he agreed, wondering if he would regret the decision later. Maybe if he hadn’t been so tired he would have been able to protest more strongly, but he was both exhausted and ravenous. Not a good combination on any day.

  “Good.” She gave him a smile that made heat course through his veins. He looked out the window to mask his reaction. Already he could tell this was a big mistake.

  “I can show you my real tea set,” Amy bubbled into the silence. “I have the princess ones. I have Belle and Sleeping Beauty, and Snow White. I don’t have Ariel, and I like her best because she has red hair like me, but I have her on my bed. And I also have . . .”

  Parker let the words rush over him, enjoying the babble that so reminded him of Madeline. His sore heart felt lighter.

  When Caitlin pulled up at her small house a few streets over, their eyes locked briefly and his confusion was back. What was he beginning to feel for this woman? Was it because he hoped she could reunite him with Madeline? Because he was physically attracted to her? Or because he was fascinated with her laugh, the slight lilt in her voice, the soft look of her lips, or how her hair had escaped the mass gathered at the back of her head? The way she spoke to Amy? All of the above?

  He was a mess. What he needed was a good night’s sleep so he could think clearly. Be in control. He closed his eyes for a moment, but all that got him was a vision of Caitlin looking up at him.

  Chapter 12

  Caitlin was going against all her personal rules by inviting Parker to her house. She knew attorneys who often helped their clients out with places to stay and clothes to wear. Others actually had affairs or became close friends with the people they represented. Caitlin had always been careful to keep her professional life separate from her personal one—an excellent policy, seeing as she mostly represented people guilty of very nasty crimes. Like Chet
Belstead, who, thanks to her, was going to spend twenty-five years behind bars, if society had any luck at all.

  “Have a seat,” she offered. “This shouldn’t take too long.” She kept a frozen chicken casserole around for emergencies when store-bought frozen food didn’t seem appropriate; it was her mother’s special recipe, and she decided to use it now. The casserole would only take ten minutes to mostly thaw in the microwave and then another thirty in the oven. That would give her time to make a salad. No, scratch that because she was out of lettuce, but she had a bagged salad from Costco that had bits of blue cheese and dried cranberries. For a bagged salad, it tasted quite good.

  Parker sat at the table, his dark eyes following her as she opened the freezer and cupboards. He had the air of a man who’d worked hard and was exhausted, both mentally and physically. She was glad she’d decided on the casserole instead of something less healthy and filling.

  If the truth were told, she didn’t invite many personal friends back to her place, either. Previously, male friends had thought it was because of Amy, and in part it was, but Caitlin also didn’t like the idea of opening herself to someone by having him see her real life. It made things much easier at break-up if most of the relationship had taken place elsewhere.

  “If there’s someplace I can wash up,” Parker said, “I’d be glad to help.”

  She noted there was a shadow on his face, though he’d shaven that morning, and his shirt was rumpled and probably dirty from the day’s work. What he needed was a good shower, but that would have to wait until they found a motel. “I’m almost finished here,” she said, “but the bathroom’s down the hall.”

  “I’ll show you.” Amy jumped up from where she knelt by the hamster cage.

  “You can show him but then let him have his privacy.”

  Amy sighed in exasperation. “He’s just going to wash his hands.”

  “Amy,” Caitlin warned.

  Parker laughed. “Where is this bathroom, Amy? And just so you know, I am definitely closing the door.”

  Amy rolled her eyes. “Come on. It’s down here.” She clumped to the hall and Parker stood to follow.