Sex in Numbers (S.I.N. Rock Star #1)

by S. R. Watson

  S.R. Watson is a Texas native who resides in Houston with her husband and four children. She is an operating room nurse who has evolved into an author of Erotica and New Adult. She grew up reading the Sweet Valley Series (Twins, High, & University) among others. Back then she would use notebook paper to create stories and cut pictures out of her mother's JC Penney catalogs for the characters she wanted to portray. She ventured away from reading and writing stories when she left home for college to pursue her BSN and then MBA, but picked up reading again in 2012. Her love for the stories written by her favorite indie authors made her decide to pursue own dreams of writing. Her Forbidden Trilogy was her debut release. She looks forward to sharing her writing journey with everyone.

  When S.R. Watson is not writing, she likes to read, listen to various genres of music, make handmade natural soap, and travel. She is down to earth, loves a nice glass of wine, and is addicted to watching the television series Scandal.

  Shawn Dawson is an Illinois native who resides in Elgin. He has always been an athlete, which has led to many achievements. He is currently a sponsored athlete for Flex Till You're Famous and Buff Bake as well as the brand ambassador of GDD World underwear. He is also a published cover model for fifteen books with more to release. His newest journey has taken him on a different path to pursue writing. He is making his debut as an author along side S.R. Watson with Sex in Numbers. It is book one in the S.I.N. Rock Star Trilogy. When Shawn is not writing, he enjoys spending time with his fur baby Camden, playing his Xbox, working out, and helping to change the lives of his online clients through coaching.

  (Senior Year of HS)

  THIS IS A BUSINESS TRANSACTION. It’s just skin. No sex. I repeat this mantra to myself as I attempt to still my nerves. The closer I get to the private room where the stranger awaits, my resolve weakens and my heart speeds up. I have been bought for the night. There is no turning back. I turn the knob slowly and check my innocence at the threshold. The room is dimly lit and for that I’m grateful.

  “Come in and close the door Ivory,” a deep voice commands from a sofa in the shadows. Ivory is the stage name that Sarah chose for me. She and I waitressed together at Carlito’s restaurant before she turned me on to this place for better tips. I was never supposed to be one of the dancers. I was just supposed to waitress. Sometimes circumstances dictate how shit really goes down and you just have to hold on for the ride. I close the door behind me, but I don’t make any moves toward him. He doesn’t give me his name, but I’m okay with that.

  “I won’t bite. Come closer and let me get a look at you,” he says softly. I’m dressed in a black mini dress that barely covers my ass, a mini thong, and five-inch patent leather heels—all thanks to Mindy. She is one of the dancers here at Club Diamonds and the only other person I get along with besides Sarah. I make timid steps in his direction—desperate for this night to be over.

  “Jesus. You have a body made for sin. I’m a tits and ass man and you’re stacked.” I don’t bother to answer him.

  Instead I look out into the distance. The shot of whiskey Mindy gave me to drink before coming in here, is not working. I can feel his eyes assessing every inch of my body. I shudder at the dirtiness of it. I haven’t even taken my clothes off yet. “Look at me Ivory.” His commanding tone is back. He lights a cigar and it is enough to cast light on his handsome face. I quickly compartmentalize his features—strong jaw, cerulean blue eyes, blond hair, and a long and lean physique. His tie is loosened and his dress pants fit him like a glove. They are definitely tailored. I’m guessing he is some sort of business executive. He is easy on the eyes for sure so why in the hell is he here paying for me to get naked for him? I’m sure women would jump at the opportunity to do a lot more.

  He crosses one leg over his knee and puffs on his cigar. The silence is unnerving, but then he finally speaks up. “You’re such a contradiction. Your body is sinful, yet innocence shines from you like a beacon. Sin and innocence existing together in one tempting package.” God, just shoot me now. I swallow back the bile that is threatening to come up. He is making me feel even dirtier than I already do.

  “Shall we start?” I finally question and he chuckles.

  “Absolutely Ivory. It’s your show,” he replies amused. I walk over to the CD player built into the wall and press play.

  A CD with my playlist is already inside the player, again courtesy of Mindy. She has truly thought of everything. Ivory’s “Movement” begins to play from the speakers and the correlation isn’t lost on me—or him for that matter. As I walk back over to him, his smirk is telling. He knows Ivory isn’t my real name. This is meant to be his fantasy so why do I feel like I’m in a nightmare. I turn my back to him and begin to slowly move my hips to the beat. I want to pretend I’m in the room alone, but his voice makes that impossible.

  “Take off the dress Ivory.” I can hear the lust in his voice and it makes my stomach knot. He is a good looking man, but the only thing I can think about is that another man besides my boyfriend of two years is about to see me naked. My stomach rolls even more at the betrayal. Tears sting behind my eyes as I remember why I agreed to go through with any of this. My mother has always sacrificed everything for us and now that she is unable to do so, I must take over the reigns—by any means necessary. I can’t have her worried that our savings will run out while her health deteriorates in front of me a little each day. I push the fucking dress off my shoulders and down my hips. Once it’s at my ankles, I kick it towards the door where I left my dignity. I’m so sorry Landon.

  “Now the thong,” the man instructs. I hesitate for a moment before complying. The tears are falling harder now, but I don’t turn around. I hear him unzip his pants and panic falls over me. “You have such a nice round ass,” he observes. His voice sounds strangled and I don’t have to turn around to know that he is masturbating. He scoots forward on the sofa—close enough to touch my leg and I damn near jump out of my skin.

  “Relax baby. This is as far as my hand will go.” He begins caressing the side of my thigh with one hand while he gets himself off with the other hand. I close my eyes and try to let my mind go somewhere else. The smell of sex permeates the room though and I can’t find the mental escape I’m seeking. I’m barely moving to the beat now as his hand moves faster toward his release. I feel something wet and warm hit the back of my legs and I scream.

  “Motherfucker!” I can’t believe he just ejaculated on me. I don’t wait to hear his reply. I grab my thong and dress off the floor near the door and run out. I’m thankful the private rooms and dressing room are away from the main part of the club. I run into the dressing room and straight toward the shower. The girls that are in here touching up their make up look at me like I’m a crazy person. I get to the shower and turn the water on as hot as it will go. I step in and slide down the tile.

  I’m not in here long before the water shuts off. I look up and see that it is Mindy. “One of the girls told me you were out of the private room,” she sighs. “Sarah just arrived. She’s checking in and she’ll be in here in a second. I wish I could tell you things get easier after your first time, but you’re different. You’re not like us. You shouldn’t be doing this,” she finishes. She doesn’t know how wrong she is. I have to do this. I’ve waitressed here for four months already and although it is two to three times more money than the restaurant, the twenty thousand dollar advance I got from George is more than I could make on my own. George is the owner of this club. The agreement is for me to do private dances for his VIP customers whenever they visit the club. No questions asked. These terms are supposed to be for one year. Now that I know what some of the women make nightly, I know he took advantage of my naivety. I still waitress in the meantime and make my tips on top of the twenty grand so I put that money away into a separate savings. My mom would shit a brick if she knew what I was really up to. The problem is, after tonight, I don’t know how I will survive a whole year in George’s debt.

  Sarah is here now and
looking at me with sympathy. “Let’s give her a minute Mindy. Finish your shower Ivory and we’ll see you when you get out.”

  The girls did their best to console me. I couldn’t share with them the mess I’m in or even the arrangement I made with George. I pacified them by telling them I would get over it. That it was just nerves. They looked doubtful. As far as they knew, I approached the owner for a chance to make some extra money on the side—not the other way around. After checking that my mom is in her bed asleep, I head to my room and crawl under the covers. Now that I’m alone with my thoughts, the sordid details of today replay in Technicolor.

  I know I’m stripping out of necessity, but this is so unfair to Landon. I haven’t even given him my virginity, yet I had some strange man come on me. If that’s not fucked up, I don’t know what is. There’s no way I can share with him what I’m doing, but I have to let him go. He deserves someone better than me. I’m tainted now with betrayal and immorality. He will never just let me go without a cause though so I must give him one. Tomorrow will be my hardest day since I learned my mother had terminal cancer. I know my performance is going to wreck him and myself in the process. I hate the unfairness of it all, but for my mother I will do it. I scream into my pillow as I let the tears fall uninhibitedly. I cry until there are no more tears to shed and I’m numb.

  (Present Day)

  TEARS SLIDE DOWN MY heated cheeks as I scan the domain that holds my secrets. The ugliness of my past, the skeletons that haunt me will not go with me to my new place. I cry, not for my loss—as my mother is now free from the pain and suffering that had plagued her for the last two years. No these tears are ones of renewed freedom—a celebration for the reincarnation of the girl that I thought was lost forever. Though my innocence can’t be revived, the rebirth of my purpose is restored. I must make her proud. The emptiness of our house symbolizes that this chapter of my life is over. I sold everything because it was tainted with the memories I’m so desperate to forget. My cell phone rings in my purse, effectively pulling me out of my reverie. I look down at the caller ID and see that it is my best friend Peyton.

  “Hey Peyton,” I answer as I wipe away my tears.

  “How is the packing going? Sorry I couldn’t fly down to help you wrap things up.” Peyton and I met the second half of my senior year when I transferred to Houston from Denver, Colorado. We quickly formed a bond and have remained in touch after she went off to college at Florida State University. My mother had stage—three lung cancer at the time and I didn’t want to leave her alone. I stayed behind and took classes at the local community college. A year has since passed.

  Now that she is gone, there is nothing left for me here. Peyton suggested that I transfer to FSU to join her and I agreed. She lives in a three bedroom apartment off campus, but since her two roommates are a couple, they’re offering the third bedroom to me. After paying off all my mother’s bills and selling everything in the house, I have some money saved to start the next chapter of my life. Nothing was left from the twenty grand after we moved to Houston and got situated, but I have some money. Peyton wanted to be here to help me finalize my affairs and prepare for my departure, but she had taken summer classes and had finals this week.

  “I’m all done. The cab is actually outside waiting to bring me to the airport. I should be arriving in Tallahassee inside of six hours.” I reassure her.

  “Okay then. I can’t wait for you to meet Thor and Giselle. They’re going to love you. We’ll have to plan something fun to do with these few weeks we have before the fall semester starts.” The excitement in her voice is contagious. I find myself sharing her enthusiasm as I grab two of my suitcases. I’ll come back for the third one after I bring these two down to the cab. Yes, my entire belongings fit into three suitcases. I wasn’t exaggerating about starting over.

  “I can’t wait to meet them either. I’ll call you when I land. I only have a little over an hour to get to the airport and get checked in.” I love my friend, but she can talk your head off if you let her.

  I drag my two suitcases up the third flight of stairs while Peyton carries the other one. “Jesus. What the hell do you have in here woman?” she teases.

  “That is my just my shoes,” I say sticking my tongue out at her. “You’re the one who chose to live on the third floor. I can only imagine trying to get your groceries up here.”

  “Yeah, it can get a bit tiresome when you’re hauling stuff up, but it was the last three bedroom unit available. Wait until you see this place. It is so worth it, unlike the university apartments.”

  We walk in and she is right. The apartment itself is nice, but the decor is beautiful. The contemporary furnishings, decorative pieces, and artwork lean towards sophistication and not the home of college students. I love the variations of greens and browns in different patterns and shapes. The stuff from my old home was a collection of furniture and decor my mother acquired over the years. Nothing matched, but it was comfortable. I wasn’t able to get much for it. Thankfully her jewelry and vintage pieces along with the sale of the house helped me to put some money away in savings. I walk over to the kitchen and run my hands along the marble countertops. The state of the art kitchen has mahogany cabinets and stainless steel appliances. The bar-like counter overlooks the living room so you can see your guests as you cook or they can sit at the counter. Great concept for entertaining.

  “Come on. Let me show you the rest of your new home,” Peyton smiles. She shows me the master bedroom and it is huge. It has a walk in closet along with an en-suite master bath. I’m slightly envious of the separate shower and jacuzzi tub.

  “Is this your room?” I ask. I cross my fingers. If this is my bestie’s room, I can indulge in that lovely tub of hers starting now. It’s been a long day with the packing and moving. A nice soak would be amazing right now.

  “Of course not. I wish,” she giggles and my hopeful bubble burst. “This is Giselle’s room since she pays more rent than us. Thor had your room originally until things became more serious between those two. We were going to turn it into an office, but Giselle suggested we rent it out. After your mom passed, I knew it was only fitting that you moved here. I didn’t want you to be alone.”

  “Thank you Peyton. It makes all this a little easier knowing that I’m not completely alone since you’re my only family now.” She walks over and pulls me into a tight hug. My mother was an only child. She grew up in the foster system after her parents were killed in a car crash when she was ten years old. No other family members stepped forward to take her in so when she turned eighteen, she never looked back. She lived a promiscuous life until she got her shit together—desperate for someone to love her.

  When she got pregnant with me, she didn’t know who the father was. I was her saving grace—her wake up call as she explained it. From the moment of my conception, she made strides to make a life that was safe for me. Growing up, it was she and I and that was all we both needed until she got sick. That is why I couldn’t abandon her and go off to college. I’ve made some choices that she would not have been proud of if she knew, but my love for her is all that mattered.

  “Okay, let me show you to your room. I hope you like it. I made a few minor changes to make it more feminine.”

  “Oh Peyton. I love it.” I squeal. The bed has a gold floor-to-ceiling pincushion headboard that looks like something out of the Elle Decor magazine. The bed linen is dressed in gold, brown, and cream to match the color palette throughout the room. I plop on the bed and lean back into pure luxury.

  “I’m glad you like it,” she chortles.

  “I love it,” I reply, emphasizing love. “Thank you for everything.”

  “Not a problem. Why don’t you rest up for a bit and I’ll get dinner started. Thor and Giselle should be in around then.”

  “I am a little tired now that you mention it. I think I will take a nap.” I’m already pulling the covers back.

  “Good. I’ll wake you up when the food is ready.” She smiles an
d heads out of the door.

  The sound of laughter coming from the living room stirs me from my light sleep. I check the time on my phone and see that I’ve been out for a couple of hours. I slide out of bed and head towards the door since I’m still dressed. Peyton and a redhead turn to look at me. I’m guessing this is Giselle. She is stunning. Even wearing workout clothes, I can see her lean and fit physique.

  “Hi. I’m Giselle Hahn and you must be Nevaeh Hewett,” she smiles warmly. “I would hug you, but I’m all sweaty. I’m waiting for Thor to get out of the shower. If I get into the tub, I’ll be done for.” I know what she means. She seems pleasant enough.

  “Nice to meet you Giselle. Peyton has told me so much about you.”

  “All good things I hope,” she winks.

  Peyton grabs a glass of wine from the counter and hands it to me. “Come. Have a seat.” She looks over at Giselle and winks. “Giselle, I’ll let her learn about your craziness all on her own,” she jokes. Peyton walks around the counter and grabs two plates off the stove before heading back to sit next to me. “It’s baked ziti—my specialty.” She takes a bite of her own food and waits eagerly for me to dig in. It is delicious. I swear I finish the whole plate in record time.

  “That was so delicious,” I exclaim. Peyton giggles as she finishes her own food. She grabs our empty plates and heads toward the dishwasher.

  “I agree. It’s my absolute favorite. I can’t wait to take my shower so I can get some while it’s hot,” Giselle says. “So Neveah. Have you had a chance to get settled?”