Hidden Under Her Heart

by Rachelle Ayala

  “I have nothing to say to you.” Maryanne gritted her teeth and held the door open. “What we had ended long ago, at your insistence.”

  “I’m not here to rekindle an old flame.” Barry peeled her hand off the door handle and shut the door. “I’m here on business.”

  His hand felt clammy and reptilian. Maryanne jerked out of his grasp. A fluttery chill stretched over her scalp. “Whatever you’re selling, I’m not buying.”

  He settled on the sofa and ran his fingers through his long black hair. His piercing blue eyes sharpened as he gave her a leering grin. “Have a seat.”

  “No, Barry. I’m not falling for that again.” She leaned against the doorframe. Did this jerk think he could just waltz into her life after all these years and have his way with her?

  He rubbed his chin and smirked. “Sorry, you’re not that irresistible. I’ve got plenty of hot chicks lined up in my bed. Honestly, I’m here on a mission of mercy.”

  Maryanne’s chest steamed. She marched over and yanked his arm. “Get out of here, asshole.”

  He clamped her hand and glared. “I will. But remember. You left the party with that black guy. You were arguing with him, and he dragged you to his car. No one saw you after that. The next morning, I get a call from security at the church. That black guy was standing over you, so I called the police and watched until they took you to the hospital. Stay away from him. He’s a criminal.”

  “I don’t believe you.”

  Barry pursed his lips. “Whatever. It’s for your own good. When Ryan told me Lucas threatened to kill him, I figured I owed you a warning.”

  He opened the door and looked around before stepping out. Maryanne shut the door after him. A bloom of cold sweat made her dizzy, and she sank to the floor and held onto her knees, rocking herself on the carpet.

  Lucas gave me water and sang to me. His voice, slow and rich, like molasses, dark chocolate and cream, calmed me. He would never hurt me.

  Chapter 13

  Maryanne calibrated the breathing test program with the patient’s age and weight. She yawned and rubbed her forearms. Six weeks after the party and she was still exhausted no matter how much sleep she got.

  Vera tapped her shoulder. “Hey, get on it. Mrs. Soto’s waiting.”

  Maryanne picked up her folder and opened the door. “Good afternoon, Mrs. Soto, how are you?”

  “Doing great.” Mrs. Soto stepped out of her shoes and onto the scale.

  “How’s the asthma?”

  “Better, since we got rid of the rabbit,” Mrs. Soto replied. “I sure miss him. How’s Lindor doing, do you know?”

  Maryanne led the way into the examination room. “Vera’s niece loves him. He acts like a dog, jumping around, and he’s not afraid of her dog either, just charges right up to him.”

  “Is that safe for him?”

  “Not to worry.” Maryanne attached the blood pressure cuff to Mrs. Soto’s arm. “Max is a golden retriever, very gentle. Seems Lindor gets the best of him. I’ll ask Vera to send you a video.”

  “Oh, thanks. And how about you? Last time we spoke, you were waiting for prince charming. Has he found you?”

  “Not exactly.” Maryanne pushed the button on the blood pressure machine. “But life isn’t just about falling in love and wanting to get married. I’m thinking of going back to school.”

  “Oh? That’s interesting. What will you study?” Mrs. Soto winced as the blood pressure machine tightened.

  “I’d like to teach or do research, get a PhD. There’s a shortage of nursing doctorates. 130/81, hmm…. Slightly higher than last time. Are you doing okay?” Maryanne replaced the cuff into the holder.

  “I’m okay, had an argument with my boss this morning, that’s probably it.” Mrs. Soto rubbed her arm. “Well, I’m glad for you. An education lasts longer than many men.”

  “That’s for sure. I feel better about myself, and my mind is uncluttered because I’m not dating anyone or trying to be someone’s girlfriend.”

  Maryanne entered Mrs. Soto’s stats into the computer and handed her the breathing test apparatus. She wasn’t going to think about Lucas, her last failed attempt. She had called him and assured him she didn’t believe any of the accusations. He was polite, but told her he planned on altitude training in Colorado for the rest of the summer. He sounded uncomfortable speaking to her and said he’d rather e-mail. Thankfully, she had never slept with him.

  Mrs. Soto stared at the mouthpiece as if it were a college entrance exam. She took a few breaths and rubbed her palms.

  “Remember how to do it?” Maryanne encouraged her. “Take a big, big, big breath and blow as hard as you can for as long as you can. Ready? Blow, blow, blow, blow, go, go, go, go, go. There!” Maryanne recorded the test result showing slightly more lung capacity. “That was great. Let’s get a few more readings.”

  Mrs. Soto took two more tries and finished her tests. “Good luck with grad school.”

  “Thanks.” Maryanne wanted to be important to someone, and if it couldn’t be a man, then she’d dedicate herself to her career and her patients.

  She went for her break after administering a skin test to a little boy who squirmed after each scratch. Settling on a bench under a willow tree with her tablet, she pulled up Melissa Foster’s latest bestseller, Traces of Kara. The horror gripped her as she imagined herself stuck inside an abandoned power plant, stalked by a crazed man. Lucas would climb back in to save her, but be knocked out by the killer. Then Maryanne would inject the man with a tranquilizer and save everyone.

  Her phone rang. Dad? He never called on weekdays.

  “Hi, Dad.”

  “What the hell you think you’re doing?”

  Typical of her father to start a rant without asking her how she was.

  “I’m at work.”

  “Ted showed me a video. Have you seen it?”

  He called to talk about a video? Her seventeen-year-old brother was always forwarding links of videos.

  “I never open them. You could get hacked.”

  “This one’s no hack.” His voice tightened as if he swallowed dry rocks.

  “Is Ted in trouble?”

  “What the hell were you thinking dancing on the table like a whore?”

  He just called her a whore? Maryanne’s mouth went dry. “I didn’t do anything.”

  “Check the video,” her father roared and cut the call. Her hands shaking, she navigated to her e-mail and pulled up the video her brother sent. A sinking sensation slid from her stomach to her toes. The title of the video was “Holy Roller Maryanne.” She held her breath and clicked on it.

  There she was in her off-the-shoulder mini dress dancing on a coffee table. She dragged her hand between her legs and leaned back, then toppled onto a couch, knocking down a globe, the one she saw in her dreams. The lights went dim, and the video cut to a shadowy figure on a waterbed, rolling and writhing. The woman was covered by the figure of man on the bed while other men cheered.

  Maryanne dropped the tablet and slumped to her hands and knees, unable to get enough air. Pinpoints of light flashed, and her lips and fingers turned numb, the tightness moving into her arms and legs.

  She’d been raped.

  ~~~

  Lucas and Zach returned from the Pike’s Peak ascent training run. The last part, near the summit, called the Golden Steps, was the most brutal. It was almost July, and Colorado had experienced an early heat wave. After hitching a ride back with a family in a minivan, they arrived at the motel where they were staying.

  Zach unlocked the door. “I need a shower. Mind if I go first?”

  “No, go ahead. I’m going to check my e-mail.” Lucas woke his iPad and scrolled through his messages. About a week ago, he had started e-mailing Maryanne. The distance had leveled off his emotions, and he was able to be her friend without feeling on the edge of a breakdown.

  He opened her latest e-mail: I’m glad you’re concentrating on your training. If anyone deserves to win gold, it’s you
. I miss you. [animated kissing emoticon].

  He tapped out a reply: Hey, miss you too. Had a great run today. How’s your studying? Have you decided which grad schools to apply to?

  He opened the next e-mail from Sandra. It was a forwarded message. Must see: Holy Roller Maryanne. Hey bro, Ma’s fittin’ to shit. Your girlfriend’s the internet porn star.

  A chill trickled over his scalp. His fingers trembled as he clicked on the video. Maryanne was in a red mini-dress, dancing seductively. The following scene showed grainy figures on a bed. They were raping her!

  He flung the iPad across the room and grabbed his mountain bike. His arms and legs shaking, he pedaled furiously into the forest. Dusk descended and the trail thinned. Lucas skidded and toppled over a rock, hitting a tree. His head buzzed with pain. He swiped his hand over his hair and smeared it with blood. Unable to hold back tears, he pounded his fists into the tree trunk.

  His cell rang. It was Zach.

  “Where the hell are you?”

  “I don’t know, crashed against some tree,” Lucas replied between big gulps.

  “It’s Maryanne, isn’t it? What’s she done now?”

  “Nothing.”

  “You have to cut her off if you want to make the Olympics,” Zach said. “I don’t do anything but one night stands. Stress relief, no emotional crap.”

  “I’m not you,” Lucas mumbled, trying to keep from sobbing. “She needs me. Things are about to blow up on her.”

  ~~~

  Lucas drove back to the Bay Area, alone. He gripped the steering wheel tightly, barely able to contain his rage enough to drive. Rain splattered the windshield, and the blades couldn’t remove the water fast enough. Lucas stared straight ahead through blurry eyes. This had to be the worst thing that had ever happened to Maryanne. He’d comfort her and help her through this ordeal—if she’d let him. He had to be calm though, not turn angry and upset her. The miles rolled by.

  After dropping his luggage and bike at his apartment, Lucas called Carmen who confirmed that Maryanne was not at work and hadn’t been since the video went viral. He scrolled through the comments on the video. The location of the first part of the video was the pastor’s study. Bloggers identified it by the contents in the bookshelf along the wall. Lion Community Church issued a statement that the video was doctored. They admitted Maryanne had danced on the coffee table, but accused someone of splicing the shadowy forms on the bed. Lucas showered, put on a suit, and headed to Maryanne’s. It would be better to go unannounced. He’d take her out and cheer her up, show her how much he cared.

  The curtains at her apartment were drawn, and the windows were shut tight. Lucas checked his tie and knocked. No answer. He called her cell, and it went to voice mail.

  Where was she? He texted: I’m back. I want to see you, L.

  He jogged down to the carport. Her electric car was plugged into the charger. He called her again.

  She picked up. “I know you’re out there, please go.”

  He bounded back up the stairs and stopped at her door. “I dropped out of altitude training.”

  “You what?” She opened the door. “I can’t believe you. Go back to Colorado right now. You need to be there.”

  He stepped over the threshold and hugged her. “I want to be with you.”

  “Oh, Lucas.” Her body melted into him anyway. Her eyes were swollen, and her hair was limp over her face. She breathed heavily, and her shoulders sagged. “You saw the video.”

  “Yes, but I’m still your friend.” He caressed both of her shoulders. They were tight with tension. “The video means nothing.”

  She pushed out of his arms and turned toward the wall, her hands covering her face. “Go back to Colorado. There’s nothing you can do here.”

  “I’ll help you get through this. None of it would have happened if I hadn’t hurt your feelings. You wouldn’t have gone out with Ryan if I’d told you how I really felt.”

  “Don’t say anything.”

  He grabbed her shoulders and turned her around. “I think I’m in love with you.”

  “No, no. You can’t be. I probably had sex with a bunch of guys. I’m trash. Not worth your attention.”

  Her words slapped him cold. She was the victim and needed reassurance. He hugged her and kissed her forehead, her temple and cheeks. “Don’t you ever, ever say that about yourself. You’re a beautiful person. They gave you drugs and you didn’t know what happened.”

  She gulped and held her breath, spit it out in one whoosh. “I’m so scared. Everyone hates me. I get e-mail saying I’m out to ruin the church, and my own father called me a whore.”

  What kind of father would do that? He was starting to understand why Maryanne had insecurity issues. Lucas held her tighter. “I don’t care what anyone says. They’re all wrong.”

  “I still feel horrible,” she wailed.

  And that was why he was here. To show her how much he cared, to bear her burdens and heal her wounds. He swept her into his arms and tickled her ribs, accompanying it with ‘goochie, goochie, goo’ sounds.

  “Stop it. What are you doing?” She squirmed and wiggled. “I’m supposed to be miserable.”

  “Ah… you’re hurting my feelings. Aren’t you happy to see me?” He grabbed her around the waist and swung her around and around. “Are you dizzy yet? I’m not stopping until you’re happy again.”

  “Let me down.” She tapped his shoulders, but her face relaxed and a giggle escaped her.

  “Gotcha. Made you laugh. Put on something nice, cuz I’m taking you out.” He muffed up her hair. “I missed you so much.”

  “I missed you too.” She kissed his nose and squeezed his cheeks. “Lucas Knight, you’re a crazy guy, and I’m so glad you’re here.”

  Chapter 14

  Maryanne laid out her slinky dresses. The glittery silvery one was too tight, and the tube topped shell showed too much cleavage. She pinched her nipples. Sore and tender, but she was only three weeks late, not outside the range of her irregular cycles. She probably wasn’t pregnant, and even if she were, she could take care of it quietly. He had no need to know.

  She pulled on a stretchy satin celadon colored dress with a princess neckline bordering on the conservative side. She’d have a good time and make Lucas happy. He’d come to take her mind off her troubles, and right now, he was her only friend besides Vera. She stepped into the bathroom and applied her makeup, finishing with a splash of white musk body spray. After pinning her hair, she emerged from the bathroom to find Lucas flipping through the textbooks she left on the kitchen table.

  He greeted her with a wolf whistle and scanned her figure. “Wow!”

  “Are you sure about taking me out?” She leaned against the wall, hardly daring to look him in the eye. “Doesn’t the video bother you? Being seen with me?”

  He propped both hands against the wall, one on either side of her head, and leaned down. His alluring cologne and body heat surrounded her. “I want to be seen with you. Whatever those guys did, I’m going to erase it. From now on, I want to be the only man in your life.”

  She gasped and her heartbeat fluttered. He said all the right things. She almost pinched herself. Was this man for real?

  Slowly, he lowered his lips to hers and kissed her lightly, his eyes begging for an answer.

  “Oh, Lucas…” She closed her eyes to hide the tears. “I don’t know what to say.”

  “Say you’ll go out with me and have a good time.” His voice was soft against her ear.

  She barely nodded before melting into his embrace. He raised her hands above her head and trailed kisses down her jaw, touching the pulse point of her neck and nipping the sensitive spots on her shoulder. His short-cropped hair was velvety against her neck, and his strength, scent and heat surrounded her as he buried his face between her breasts. Electric impulses scattered from every nerve ending he touched. Maryanne’s breath shortened as tiny pants and moans slipped from her throat.

  She felt protected and desira
ble at the same time. He had tried to take her away from the party, taken care of her afterwards, and now he was here to support her. She pressed closer, wanting, needing to disappear into the comfort of his beating heart. His kisses feathered back up her neck, and he sighed into her ear. Goosebumps skittered up her back and danced with tingles of delight on her chest.

  “Lucas,” her breath snagged in her throat, “I don’t want anyone but you. Ever.”

  His grin spread wide. “That’s what I wanted to hear.”

  She choked back a cough. It wasn’t easy for her to admit this. It gave a man too much power. But no one had ever put her in such high regard, treated her better than she deserved, and given of himself so freely.

  He let her hands drop to his shoulders. “If we don’t get out of here, we’ll never get on the dance floor.”

  “Mmm… you’re right.” She slipped on a pair of platform stilettos and pulled a wrap from the closet.

  “Are you glad I’m back?”

  “Definitely.” After the confession she made, nothing else needed to be said. Holding hands, they headed for his car.

  ~~~

  Lucas drove across the Dumbarton Bridge and took University Avenue to the Adventurine Nightclub, a place featuring Asian cuisine in fusion with Louisiana jazz, artistically presented. A large crystal chandelier hung over the dance area. Tables surrounded the band, while darkened booths lined walls sporting large murals of Asian landscapes. The tangy scent of soy sauce, lemon grass, and blackened spices flashed from the sizzling dishes a waiter was carrying.

  Several men eyed Maryanne as she glided by them. Lucas tightened his grip on her shoulder. No one would dare hurt her with him around. She held herself well, composed and graceful, and his chest puffed with pride. He had the hottest, most smartest date, and he could care less what anyone thought.

  Lucas indicated to the maître d’ to take them to a corner booth lit with candlelight. He took her wrap, and she slid into the leather booth.

  The waiter handed him a wine list and pointed Maryanne to the cocktail menu. “When you’re ready to order, I can help you pair your dish with one of our wine selections, or if you prefer, we have some unique cocktails.”