Stay with Me
Page 20
It took time for Georgie to pull herself together. None of this made sense to her, the reality trampling on her well-ordered memories. “He lied to me…I fought him…I wanted…you, I wanted…like me and Big Gee…He said…dead.” Shaking her head she confessed, “I knew…lied. I knew but…you never came…”
Helen nodded, reaching out to gentle the fingers fisted at the base of Georgie’s fiberglass enclosed arm. “He filed a restraining order. I’m so sorry, sweetie. I missed you so much, but I couldn’t fight him.”
Her crushing anger was a potent desiccant for her tears. “I hate him!”
“No you don’t, sweetie. I know you. Maybe you don’t love him the same way you did your aunt, but you shared a bond. Your aunt used to tell me you were just like him but without the baggage. Why else would you pursue an air force career at a time when women were barely tolerated and lesbians prohibited?”
“I…you know?”
“Which one, sweetie, that you have a beautiful fiancée or that you served in the Air National Guard?”
Georgie tried to sit up straighter. At times like this she always did better on her feet, but that was impractical with a broken leg and fractured hip. Thank God the hip was just a hairline fracture or she’d probably still be in hospital. Of course, sitting vigil at the lake’s edge all day, every day, probably wasn’t such a good idea. Stiff, sore and confused, she looked to Helen, watching as she moved her chair closer again.
“Should I start from the beginning?”
At her nod, Helen took her hand again, giving it soft strokes. “After the accident, I wanted to be with you, at least for the funeral, but your grandmother was very distraught and wouldn’t hear of it. Your Aunt Georgina was in the ICU and the hospital wouldn’t let me visit. Back then it was policy to only let in family, and no matter how we felt about each other, I wasn’t family to them. Georgina had prepared a medical power of attorney, which did get me in once. When Sophia saw me there, she had a meltdown and your father asked me to leave. Georgie, I need you to hear this,” she continued in a rush of words. “He was good at first. He promised to keep me informed and work out a time to visit when Sophia wasn’t there. We thought Georgina would…the doctors were hopeful she would make a full recovery. I knew the future would be challenging for everyone and I convinced myself that your aunt could better manage Sophia if I played along for the time being. I realized too late what was happening. Your dad called me every day but his attitude, usually friendly, was becoming combative. Then he stopped calling and wouldn’t return my phone calls. I was desperate and needed to see Georgina. I loved that woman so much, Little Gee. We had planned to spend our lives together and here she was, all alone and fighting for her life. Henry managed to sneak me in when Sophia was taking a rest break, but one of the nurses mentioned it to her and that was it. I can’t really blame your dad, I think his grief and his guilt made him desperate to please her.”
“No!” she argued, “not good enough.”
“Oh Georgie…think about it. He had just lost his father, and Luigi was the most influential man in his life. His best friend and business partner had just lost his wife. His sister was in the hospital in serious condition and the loss of your mom, along with his guilt over the way he had hurt her…”
“I get that…I…”
“Sophia was an intolerant woman who worried more about how your family was perceived than anything else. She accepted Henry despite him being black, grudgingly, and it took time. Your grandfather’s high opinion of him made all the difference. I didn’t have that advantage. Sophia rejected me, and our relationship, before I even had a chance to earn Luigi’s respect. Without it, there was no way into the family. I think your father fell into a trap of trying to make your grandmother happy. Maybe he thought it was better for you kids—who knows. All I know is that your Aunt Georgina did all she could to protect me, but it wasn’t enough. In desperation I tried to sue for access to her, but it took longer than she had time to live. I didn’t give up. I kept thinking if I could keep from provoking your grandmother, she might one day consent to me seeing you. I even agreed to stay away from Georgina’s funeral, but when she learned I had been at the graveside later that day, well, it was decided that action was needed. I put it down to ignorance, intolerance, all the ’ances, really.”
“Did you…remember me?” Georgie asked, fighting the tears again.
“Oh, Little Gee, I have never forgotten you for a single minute. I even tried to petition the court for access to you, but back then there wasn’t a hope in hell. It was over before it started. God bless Henry. He has kept me up-to-date all these years. I’ve seen all your report cards and your science fair ribbons. I have every one of your school pictures, plus one of you in your air force uniform and another with your helicopter and crew in Afghanistan.”
“You know?” And now there was no holding back the tide.
Helen was out of her chair, and leaning in awkwardly, hugged her as tightly as she dared. “I know what you’re trying to do and I can’t let you. I’ve waited a long time to have you back in my life and I’m not giving up on that now. Do you understand me?” Georgie was trembling, from her emotions and the cold. “Little Gee, I know you’re in pain. I recognize so much of her in you. I’m here and I promise I’m going to help you fix this. Do you trust me?” She leaned back to look her in the face.
Georgie choked words out between sobs. “I…I messed up…Aunt Helen…How...”
Helen pulled her close again. “That’s all right. We can figure it out together, I know we can.”
* * *
It had taken all of them to load up the landscape cart and get Georgie back up to the house. Lori was stressed, worried she might have to manage Tyler if Georgie kept up her bullshit. Now she was even more concerned. It had taken only minutes for Helen to drag her into the house. They hadn’t sorted anything out yet, but it was obvious Tyler was pissed. Grabbing Tyler’s arm, Lori pulled her back, slowing her pace. “Easy there, Tiger. Let’s give them some time to talk.”
Tyler spun around to her. “She’s had all goddamn weekend! It’s my turn now!”
Lori grabbed her again, restraining her. “Hang on!” she ordered. “For fuck sakes, Ty, will you listen to me?”
“Fine,” she snapped. “Fine, just let me go!”
Lori eased off slowly, half expecting Tyler to bolt. She took a deep breath searching for the right thing to say. “Oh geez, Tiger, I know you’re mad and hurt and every other fucking thing but…” She groaned in frustration. “Ragazza stupida! Do you have any idea how intimidating it is to talk to you? I swear, sometimes I feel like a simpleton.”
“What are you talking about?” she hissed.
“You, Doctor Tyler Marsh PhD, that’s who!”
Tyler crossed her arms. “Don’t be ridiculous. You have an MBA. It’s not as if you’re uneducated or ignorant. What the hell is your problem?”
“You. You leap in here and sweep her off her feet, turn her world around, and give us back the Georgie we thought was dead.”
“Lori, I don’t know what you’re saying.”
“Please hear me out. I’m not good at this stuff. Not like you. I don’t know what you’re feeling. Frankly if it was me, I might have killed her by now, but you’re not me you’re the one she loves. I think you might be questioning that now, but you of all people should know this isn’t about you. Hell, I don’t even think it’s about the heart attack. At least not the way we think.”
Tyler, head down, kicked at a clump of dead sod. “I’m listening.”
“Okay, here’s what I’m thinking. We know her head injury fucks up how she works through problems. God knows she can work her logic through the toughest technical challenges in the book. But emotions, well, not so much. And then you come along. You found a way to make that part work again. I think we all started to forget how hard that is for her, you know, her trying to get both sides of her brain working together. She’s so much better with you that we’ve all be
en acting like she’s all fixed, but she’s not any different at all. Yes, loving you has changed so much for her but that’s your doing, your way of getting through to her, not some miraculous healing. Tiger, I can’t believe she did this to you, but I think I understand. This is the first and only decision she’s made without you to temper her ruthless logic.”
“She makes decisions every day.”
“Think about that. The decisions she makes every day are about things like a line of code, or technical standards, or millimeters of change to a design. When was the last time she handled anything outside of all her tech stuff without you helping?”
“My engagement ring,” Tyler insisted. “That wasn’t technical and she did it all by herself.”
“Really?” Lori asked but she was glad to see Tyler was still wearing her cousin’s ring. “Do you really want to hear all that went into getting that sorted?”
Closing her eyes for just a moment, and groaning at the truth of it, Tyler finally asked, “You helped her? Let me guess, Marnie must have been in on it too.”
“Oh Tiger, let me just assure you. When you’re not at her side it takes all the DiNamico-Phipps women to make it happen. And when it’s for you, it usually means your sisters too.”
“You were all there? You all helped pick out the ring?”
Smiling, Lori wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “Even your mom was in on it. Georgie would not choose a ring without their blessing.”
“If Marnie was there she would have taken over,” she lamented, studying the ring carefully.
“Not at all. She is bossy, but not when it comes to what Georgie wants for you. She mostly wanted to make sure the jewelers were being patient with Georgie and listening to what she had in mind. Only your mom and Kira got a yay or nay but that wasn’t until she got down to the last three.”
“The last three? How many rings did she look at?”
Lori hooked her arm, liking this strolling talk. “Let’s see, we went to four jewelers, and looked at a few hundred rings at each. I tell you, it was quite an education. I thought choosing the setting was hard but then she wanted to hand select the diamond and know about the gold. Even that had to be perfect. We got her through that but it took a whole friggin’ team. Starting to see where I’m going? And don’t be stubborn. I know you want to freak out on her like she’s a normal person, but you know she’s not.”
Tyler turned them back toward the big house. “I’m not saying I agree, not completely but…”
Lori stopped her on the spot. “I would give anything to have what you two have. Please Ty, please think about this before you do anything. This whole thing is nothing but her stupid fucked-up robotic brain making brutally logical decisions. It’s all zeroes and ones to her. It’s like those crazy algorithms she makes up. You know, something like, ‘Tyler’s love times the number of days together, plus X if married, and multiplied by the number of children you guys have.’ I bet if you run the numbers too, it would make perfect sense for her to leave now instead of sticking around, letting your relationship grow to love her more. As fucked up as it is to hear, I really think she believes she’s doing the right thing by you.”
Tyler was walking with her head down, but she gave Lori’s arm a bump. “My family said the same thing all weekend, along with ‘don’t give up.’ I don’t want to. I just…hurt.”
“I wish I could make that better, but it’s really up to you. She may never be one hundred percent but she’s still pretty good, don’t you think?”
That comment generated a wolfish smile. “Do you really think I’d be this upset if she was just pretty good?”
Lori hadn’t been expecting that and laughed, her mood picking up immediately. “Who knew our Georgie Porgie could be so smooth!” They had reached the patio and Lori stopped her one last time. “What’s the plan?”
“All right, here’s what we’re going to do. Let’s get her home and comfortable and let her and Helen talk for as long as they want. Did you drive Henry in today?” She nodded and Tyler said, “Good. Call Leslie and tell her we will all be home for dinner, Helen, Henry and Aydan too. Let’s give Georgie the homecoming we were planning.”
“Okay, and then?”
“And then…don’t worry. I know how she’s hurting, physically hurting, on top of everything else. All I want is to get her home and make sure she’s safe and comfortable. Sometimes it’s hard waiting for her to talk, but she does. I’ll be patient, I promise.”
Lori nodded. “Well then, let’s get this show on the road.”
Chapter Thirteen
Aydan had spent most of the evening trying to be helpful or at least stay out of the way. She had raced with Zoe to help them get Georgie in the building and upstairs. She and Zoe dragged her personal items in, and chatted amiably with the newcomer. For Aydan, everyone was new, but she was surprised to learn this new aunt was a complete stranger to Zoe, Skip, and even Leslie and Lou.
Their first priority was to get Georgie comfortable. Aydan assumed they would put her to bed, but when she insisted, they set her up on the couch in the formal living area farthest from the kitchen. Tyler wanted to give her some privacy. Aydan wasn’t sure what she meant until Henry arrived and he and this Helen person pulled the upholstered chairs close to Georgie.
Even just watching clandestinely it was obvious the conversation was a roller coaster of emotion for each of them. She watched too as Lori, Leslie, Skip with his dad, Lou, and late arrivals Kira, Megan, and Marnie all worked to comfort Tyler while they jointly prepared supper in the open kitchen. With her Fleet Street Grill closed on Mondays, Leslie had loaded up everything she needed and carried it upstairs. The constant chatter among the group as they chopped and stirred was pleasant. Even Zoe, who had tagged along to help and never quite left, was playing nice.
After everyone had eaten and cleaned up from dinner, Georgie was exhausted. Lori and Tyler helped her upstairs to the bedroom, Aydan following at Tyler’s request. She had pulled out sleepwear for Georgie, helping them get her changed and in bed. While Tyler stayed with her, she and Lori headed back downstairs to see every one out. Zoe and Skip, with their father, Lou, offered to drive Helen home. She would be back in the morning, planning to spend her days helping her niece get back on her feet. Leslie went across the hall and Henry over to his apartment too. He would be staying there while Georgie was out of commission. Aydan was seated in the living room, reading quietly and trying not to worry over the circumstances of the last few days.
“Good book?”
She jumped at Tyler’s interruption. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I found this in the library. I should have asked.”
Tyler smiled at her. “You don’t have to ask,” she said as she passed by heading for the kitchen. “Although I can’t believe you found anything worth reading in there. There’s nothing but old company manuals and…” She stopped to look at Aydan, a curious expression on her face, asking, “Feel like a little treat? I’m going to make coffee and Baileys. I’ll make it with decaf if you’re interested.”
Feeling caught out, but not wanting to look ashamed, Aydan straightened her shoulders, holding up the book she was reading and showing off the cover.
“Good choice,” Tyler offered casually, waving for her to follow. At the kitchen counter she found mugs and selected two K-cups. “This is the one you like, right?”
Nodding, she stepped up to the island, taking a seat at one of the comfortable stools.
“You know, you can talk to me or ask questions.” When she didn’t answer, Tyler pushed her gently. “With all that’s been happening over the last two, three weeks, we haven’t had a chance to talk about how you’re getting on.”
“I’m enjoying the work.”
“That’s not exactly what I meant. How are you doing, you know, with all the changes happening in your life? I can imagine this whole DiNamico/Phipps family can be a little overwhelming. I don’t know which is the greater anomaly, the number of twins in this family, or lesbians.�
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Aydan smiled weakly but the rising color in her face betrayed her discomfort.
Tyler let it go, taking both their doctored coffees over to where she had been reading, setting Aydan’s cup down beside the overturned book and taking her favorite place on the hearth with her back to the fire. “The first time I read that book I was in high school. I remember being so mad when the husband hires a slimy detective and threatens to take her daughter away. I wanted to scream, but more than that I wanted to talk to someone about it. I wanted to understand why people could be so mean.”
“Did you talk to someone?”
“Eventually. At first I tried to talk to Kira, she was my best friend growing up, but she is so much like my mom. I do love them to bits, but shades of gray they do not see.” She sipped at her coffee. “I read a few more books, pretty much every book I could find. They’re all in there along with a few hundred Georgie read when she was trying to come to grips with coming out too.”
“Is that what you think I’m doing?”
“What I think is irrelevant. What I know is you have lived a sheltered life, at least since you lost your dad. We do a lot of growing in our twenties and early thirties, a lot of lessons learned that you’ve missed out on.” When she didn’t answer, Tyler pushed her gently. “Aydan, there’s no rush, you have lots of time to learn who you are, the real authentic you. And you will always have good friends here willing to help. Please don’t ever think you’re alone, no matter what you’re going through.”
Silent but wanting to talk she finally blurted, “It wasn’t a guy.”
“Who wasn’t?”
“We were talking, when I first arrived, and you said you thought some guy must have really hurt me.”
“I’m so sorry. May I ask?”
She nodded, her head down. “I…it was my fault. She wanted me to tell my parents, but I was scared. I was worried about them hating me or not letting me go to college. Of course,” she lamented, “that’s exactly what happened after my dad died. I would have been better off risking it, but I just wasn’t sure about myself.”