Shattered by Shadows: The Innocence Cycle, Book 1

by J D Abbas

  Braiden’s eyes immediately went to Elena, who looked so lost and tiny in one of the men’s oversized shirts. She’d dropped far too much weight. Under her multicolored bruising, her skin had the pallor of death. Braiden’s dread increased. If they didn’t find an answer, she wouldn’t see the next sunrise.

  “I-I need you to t-teach me,” Braiden blurted out, looking at Elbrion.

  Elbrion nodded as he sat by Elena’s side, having just changed another makeshift diaper.

  Celdorn eyed Braiden, unspoken questions on his face.

  “There’s s-something else wrong inside El-Elena, s-something I’ve missed. She should be g-getting better. D-Dalgo seems to think I can enter her b-body and have it speak to me and t-tell me where the problem lies.”

  Braiden was surprised when no one objected. He might’ve been discussing the weather for all the reaction he got. “S-so I’m the only one s-surprised by this?”

  “I had no more idea what I was doing when I healed the children in Rhamal,” Mikaelin said. “The gift led; I followed. I still don’t understand it.”

  Braiden scratched his head, incredulous. “So b-be it.” He looked at Elbrion. “T-tell me what to d-do.”

  Elbrion stood, motioning for Braiden to take his place on the bed next to Elena. “I am no expert in the healing arts, but I will guide you as best I can. For me, it is necessary to touch a person to access his mind, though with Elena that has proven not to be the case. I would suggest you start by putting your hands somewhere against her skin.” Braiden touched Elena’s arm. “Now close your eyes and try to concentrate on what you see or feel.”

  Braiden did so. Seconds later his eyes popped open.

  “You saw something?”

  “Well, m-more like I felt s-something.” Braiden stared down at Elena, trying to make sense of what happened. “I-I immediately knew I was far from the p-problem. Almost like the arm was d-directing me elsewhere.” He heard the wonder in his own voice.

  “Listen to that direction.”

  Braiden put his hand on the side of her face and closed his eyes again. His body jerked as an energy thrust at him, as if pushing him away, but he kept his eyes closed and persisted. A wave of pain swept through him, and his hands began to shake. He could hear Elena’s body calling to him. This way. He unbuttoned her shirt then slowly moved his hands to Elena’s chest, then to her abdomen. No, over here. He moved from place to place on her belly then jerked his hands away with a gasp. Rubbing them together, he opened his eyes.

  “What did you feel?”

  “Like I was touching fire.” His eyes went from his hands to her belly, puzzled. “Can you feel it?” He placed Elbrion’s hand on her abdomen.

  “I cannot.” Elbrion patted Elena tenderly and pulled away. “Are you able to stay there long enough to hear what her body is saying to you?”

  Braiden closed his eyes and put his hands back on her lower abdomen. He felt it again, a tugging, a leading. He looked up at Celdorn. “Can you help me turn her?”

  Together they rolled her onto her side, and Braiden spread both hands across her lower back. After a few seconds, he yanked them away and shook them vigorously to cool them.

  “Th-the heat is w-worse in that area.”

  Celdorn returned her to her back.

  “Th-there’s something in there. S-something destroying her body, b-but I don’t understand wh-what I’m hearing...feeling... I-I don’t know how to explain it.” Braiden frowned. “I can’t t-tell you why, but we n-need to access her m-memory, Elbrion. There’s s-something her attacker did to her that created this p-problem. I don’t know what, b-but I just feel it so strongly.” He looked at the others. “P-perhaps it’s words or a c-curse he spoke that are literally eating away at her, or-or-or an infection he carried. I-I don’t know.” It sounded like madness.

  Elbrion pondered this. “I will need Elena’s help to uncover a specific memory. I could be lost for days inside her mind trying to find it on my own.” He looked at Elena, distressed. “We do not have that much time.”

  Celdorn gently stroked the girl’s cheek. “Elena, we need you back here. We need your help.”

  Elena’s eyes twitched. “Ada...” she mumbled. Her bulging eyes went wide, and she stared up at Celdorn, clearly horrified she’d spoken that intimate word. A faint blush spread across her pallid cheeks. “Sorry...didn’t mean...say that.”

  Celdorn smiled down at her. “Don’t be sorry. It’s in my heart as well.” He stroked her face with such tenderness.

  Oh please, Qho’el, lead me, Braiden pleaded. She’s reaching out to him as a daddy. They’ve just found each other. They need each other.

  “Elena, I require your assistance.” Elbrion knelt beside her. “There is something happening in your body that we believe is connected to your attack. I want to enter your memory, but I need your help to direct me to the right place.”

  “But…don’t remember…happened,” she rasped.

  “We can start with what you do recall, and I can follow from there to the places hidden from your waking mind.”

  “Will I see… too?”

  A blast of fear struck Braiden, nearly knocking him over.

  “I do not know,” Elbrion said. “It may remain hidden, but I will be there so you will not face it alone this time.” The tenderness in his face and voice pricked a hollow place in Braiden. Elbrion had grown attached to this girl as well. Braiden rubbed his chest, suddenly finding it hard to breathe.

  “It’s urgent, Elena,” Celdorn interrupted. “We wouldn’t ask it of you otherwise.”

  “Or I’ll die?” Elena’s eyes flickered. “You don’t have…to answer. I see…on your face.” Her gaze drifted to the ceiling. “Wouldn’t…best…let me go?” Tears welled between the bruised bulges, but even now, weak as she was, Braiden watched her fight their release. What was it she feared?

  “No, little one, we want you here with us. Please don’t give up.” Tears rolled down his cheeks.

  Braiden had never seen his lord so vulnerable. He averted his eyes out of respect, only to find Elbrion, too, had shimmering drops sliding down his face. The weight on Braiden’s chest increased. He moved his gaze to the floor, waiting.

  ~

  Elena’s heart ached. She looked at Celdorn then Elbrion, yearning to reach toward their love, moved by their tears. Yet they were asking her to do something that terrified her, to look at what had happened to cause all this damage to her body. Merely keeping her eyes open took so much effort. She just wanted to—

  “What should...I do?”

  Elena’s eyes flashed around the room to make certain it hadn’t been someone else, not wanting to believe the words had come out of her own mouth, in complete opposition to her will.

  “Tell me what happened before you were attacked. Start there and go as far as you are able. I will meet you.” Elbrion moved closer. “I am going to touch your face now.”

  Celdorn moved his hands as Elbrion positioned his.

  “What is the last thing you remember?” Elbrion asked.

  “All of...left...Rhamal. So sad. Just wanted...sleep,” she forced out. “The next...a knock.” Elena closed her eyes, her strength exhausted. “Can you...follow?”

  “I can. Do you see me?”

  “Yes.” Elena was amazed, yet again, at Elbrion’s ability to do this. It was so strange to have him inside with her. He stood by the side of her bed in the memory, and she reached out for his hand inside her mind. She stopped talking aloud and was able to let the events unfold within. At the point in her memory where she’d left her body the first time, Elbrion told her to go; he could follow the memory without her.

  Chapter 46

  As Celdorn observed the process, Elena appeared peaceful, Elbrion, tormented. His light grew dimmer and dimmer. Just when Celdorn was ready to intervene and put a stop to the connection, Elbrion opened his eyes. Silently, tenderly, he gazed at Elena, who had drifted back into a stupor. He whispered something in her ear as he stroked her forehead. />
  Elbrion’s face contorted, and he laid his head against her shoulder and started to weep. Deep, uncontrollable sobs rose up in him. Wave after wave, they came.

  Celdorn put his hand on Elbrion’s head. It’d been decades since Celdorn had seen this kind of sorrow in his friend—a grief that bound them together for life. The old torment rose in him again, that desperate, futile longing to console the inconsolable.

  The others were silent, honoring, waiting. Finally, utter exhaustion brought an empty calm, and Elbrion grew quiet. His light gradually rekindled.

  “He put some sort of medallion inside her,” Elbrion said, his head still down.

  “Inside her?” Celdorn repeated.

  Elbrion didn’t respond.

  “Inside her b-bowels?” Braiden offered.

  Elbrion nodded and sat back on his haunches. “He pushed it inside with horrible words, then he...violated her.” The others groaned. Mikaelin jumped up and slapped the wall with both palms. If Celdorn weren’t holding Elena, he’d have done the same.

  Elbrion’s body contorted and an agonized grimace consumed his face. “I have never experienced an assault, never felt in my body what it is like to be raped. I am beyond appalled. I cannot find a word for what I feel.” He turned to Mikaelin who was frenetically pacing. “How did you endure experiencing all those assaults from the children and carrying their wounds in your body?”

  Mikaelin jerked to a stop and faced Elbrion, though his eyes continued the frantic movement. “I’m still recovering.” His voice was quiet, his face grim. “I, at least, had some experience and defenses upon which to draw.” His gaze settled on Elbrion, filled with a depth born of great pain.

  Dalgo brought a chair and encouraged Elbrion to sit. “You need to separate from her memory. It isn’t yours; don’t torment yourself.”

  “Perhaps it is good for us to be tormented, Dalgo. Perhaps we need to comprehend the pain of others on a deeper level.” He locked eyes with Mikaelin, an understanding passed between them before he turned back to Elena. “No wonder she wanted us to leave her to die...” He leaned forward and kissed Elena’s forehead.

  Braiden closed his eyes. “W-we have to remove the object, if we c-can. And I hope it d-doesn’t tear her up again in the p-process.”

  “I’ve never done anything like this,” Dalgo said. “I bow to your gift.”

  Dismay swept over Braiden. He looked at the other men as if searching for another way, a different answer. The young healer swayed and put his hand on Elena’s leg to steady himself. Braiden jolted and gaped at his hand. Then something shifted in him; he stood straighter and his resolve returned. “El-Elbrion, this may sound strange, b-but what position was Elena in when he p-put the medallion inside her, or-or more importantly, wh-what position was she in when he p-pushed it farther inside?”

  Four sets of eyes immediately focused on the floor; a silent groan moved among the group. No one wanted to hear the answer or imagine the event at all.

  After a shaky breath, Elbrion explained what he’d seen.

  Mikaelin kicked the wall.

  Silvandir looked as if the volcano was churning again.

  Braiden rubbed his face. “I-I’m afraid we have to p-put Elena in that same position, in order to g-get the medallion out along the same p-path, and hopefully not d-do more damage.” He paused; his breaths turned to huffs, his teeth gritted. “This m-makes me sick. I-I want to see this man d-die,” he whispered as his rage-filled tears fell unhindered.

  Celdorn braced himself and did what had to be done. He carried Elena to the chair next to the bed and laid her across his lap, face down. “Elbrion, you position her from here. You’ve seen.” He gently turned Elena’s face to the side, supporting her head with his arm, and stroked her cheek. She remained unconscious.

  ~

  While Elbrion prepared her, Braiden found the instrument he would use to extract the object—he hoped. The men turned away again as he approached Elena. Braiden put his hand under her long shirt, against her feverish skin, trying to envision the object, letting her body guide him.

  Elbrion spoke in a soft, reassuring tone. “Speak light into the instrument as you proceed.” Then he recited words in Elnar.

  Braiden repeated what he heard. He felt a surge from Elena’s body as if to guide his hand, and unbidden words poured forth from some deep well within him. Energy moved through his hand, down the forceps and into Elena’s body. Metal connected with metal. He slowly slid the object out, speaking words of light all the while. He stepped to the side until the trapped poisons were released, but kept one hand on her the entire time. Then he laid both hands on Elena’s lower back and watched in amazement as they began to glow and pulsate with light. A fire bit at his palms, but Braiden refused to pull away.

  When Elena’s skin stopped burning, he felt prompted by some internal force to touch the wounds he’d previously stitched in that area and watched in amazement as they healed, leaving only faint scars behind. Still speaking healing words, he moved his hand to the top of Elena’s thigh, where he’d repaired the long knife wound. He traced his finger along the stitches and the wound disappeared, leaving a jagged scar as the only evidence of the injury.

  Suddenly he was quiet. It was done.

  When he looked up, the men were staring at him, for not only were his hands glowing, but his entire being was afire, so much so that the light was reflecting off the walls. Braiden stepped back, frightened. He gazed around at the others hoping they could offer some understanding, but no one spoke.

  Celdorn turned Elena over in his arms and kissed her forehead. “She’s cooler,” he said with amazement. He returned to the bed, cradling her in his arms. He wrapped the blanket around her and rocked her, whispering tender words he couldn’t hear.

  “Well done, Braiden.” Elbrion’s face relaxed.

  Braiden’s knees suddenly gave way. He collapsed into a chair and stared at his hands. The light had stopped pulsating, but they continued to throb.

  Dalgo hurried over and examined them. “Oh, Braiden, your hands are burned!” He grabbed the basin of water and submerged them. Braiden winced as the water sizzled and steamed.

  Between tight breaths, he explained, “I-It’s from the infection that b-burned inside her. I-I felt the fire g-go into my hands.”

  Elbrion picked up the metal that had been removed from Elena’s body. “It is not a medallion. It is a smithy’s symbol with the initials LD,” he said, a question in his tone. His expression turned fierce, violent, and his light flashed. “As he shoved this inside her, he told her, ‘This is your true destiny, whore. You’re nothing but a receptacle for the’”—Elbrion closed his eyes—“‘refuse of others. I’ll be with you every day of your short, worthless life. Die with Anakh’s blessing.’”

  Elbrion threw the metal to the ground and turned to Celdorn. “I want his head.” The Jhadhela in him flared to a white fire. Brilliant tongues leapt out from him, lashing at the walls and climbing toward the ceiling.

  The other men gaped at this rare display, while Braiden found himself cringing away from his wrath.

  Elena suddenly opened her eyes and stared up at the startled Celdorn. “Ada?” she said weakly but smiling this time.

  Elbrion’s flames immediately faded, and the men turned their attention to the girl.

  Celdorn grinned down at her. “It’s good to see your smile. Crooked as it is,” he added, touching her cheek gently.

  “I’m thirsty,” she rasped.

  Elbrion broke free of his fury and moved to respond.

  “H-how do you f-feel?” Braiden asked as Elbrion helped her to drink.

  “Not as nauseous.” Elena glanced around the room. “You all look so grim. Didn’t it work? Am I going to die?”

  “Not anymore,” Celdorn said. “We thought we were going to lose you there for a while, but we’re much relieved now.” He smiled as his tears spilled.

  Elena gazed from man to man. “And you were all here worrying about me?” Braiden saw t
he tears that burned in her sunken eyes, but she quickly blinked them away, even now. “No one has ever cared if I lived or died before.” She looked at each one again, and her crooked lips pulled into a faint smile. Her hand clutched at her chest as she took a deep, shaky breath.

  Her nose suddenly wrinkled in disgust. “What’s that putrid smell?” She glanced at the mess on the floor. “Is that from me?”

  “Th-that’s what was m-making you sick,” Braiden replied.

  “What happened?” Though her face said she might not want to know.

  “The m-man who attacked you p-put a piece of metal inside you b-before he assaulted you. I-it has been trapped inside your b-bowels, poisoning your b-body.”

  “How did you know that?”

  “From your memory, when I went inside with you,” Elbrion answered.

  Elena’s brow furrowed. “How did you remove the metal?”

  Braiden looked at Celdorn; he nodded. “I-I used these”—Braiden held up the forceps—“and your b-body directed m-me.”

  Elena’s brows arched. “My body directed you?”

  Suddenly self-conscious, Braiden’s cheeks and ears burned.

  “It seems we’ve discovered Braiden’s true gift,” Celdorn said. “He’s able to listen to people’s bodies, which guide him to the need; he can then speak light and healing into them.”

  Elena’s eyes widened, and her mouth fell open.

  “He absorbed the fever and infection that was in your body into his hands,” Celdorn added. “Show her your hands, Braiden.”

  He stepped forward, his blush deepening, as he held them out for Elena to inspect.

  “Oh Braiden, they’re burned. That’s from me?” She gazed up at him, the unshed tears returning.

  “They aren’t as b-bad as they l-look. They’ll h-heal quickly.” He hid his hands in the folds of his tunic. Compared to what she’d been through, this was nothing. “Y-you’ll no d-doubt be happy to know that the o-other injury we talked about is completely h-healed. As is that h-horrible knife wound at the t-top of your leg.”