Sisters By Choice

by Lillian Duncan

  Or was she just jealous Jamie had a child and she didn’t?

  Patti shook away the horrible thought. She wasn’t that selfish and self-centered, was she?

  Patti’s breathing quickened. Not enough air. Trouble breathing. Panic attack. With eyes squeezed shut, she forced herself to slow her breathing down. One. Two. Three. Four. One. Two. Three. She didn’t want to think about having babies, or her sister.

  As soon as her breathing returned to normal, her thoughts returned to Sabrina. Even though Patti and her twin didn’t have a relationship, they were still sisters. This little girl was her niece, her family. And Jamie trusted Patti enough to teach Sabrina how to dial her number in an emergency.

  And even though it wasn’t a real emergency, Sabrina had been terrified, nonetheless.

  Thinking of phone numbers, how exactly had Jamie known hers?

  Patti hadn’t talked with Jamie since she’d moved into her new house, and Patti’s number was unlisted so students couldn’t find it.

  3

  Palm Beach, Florida

  Patti clenched the arm rests as the plane tilted forward.

  The plane hit the runway.

  Her head bounced in time with the bumping as they slowed. She looked at her watch. As much as she hated flying, it was still the fastest way to travel. She blew out nervous air.

  After several conversations with the nanny, Patti decided she needed to come to Florida.

  The nanny had yet to hear from Jamie and was worried.

  Sabrina kept crying for her mommy. It was as if the little girl knew something was wrong even if the adults did not.

  Patti had no idea how long she’d stay.

  Unless Jamie came back home to be with her daughter.

  She released the breath she’d been holding, feeling that familiar anger her twin could ignite.

  Talk about a love-hate relationship. Her twin could irritate Patti more than any other person on earth. Didn’t she understand kids weren’t disposable? One couldn’t just quit taking care of them when it stopped being fun.

  Patti pictured the scene.

  Jamie all full of remorse, as always. Apologizing and promising to do better next time. A lot of good that would do. What must her poor niece’s life be like with a mother as flighty as Jamie?

  That sweet, innocent child deserved better.

  If Jamie wasn’t capable of taking care of her daughter, Patti was.

  Being Sabrina’s aunt gave her responsibilities and, unlike Jamie, she wouldn’t shirk them. She needed to have a serious talk with her twin about her own responsibilities to her daughter and whether she could fulfill them.

  Of course, Jamie had managed to take care of Sabrina for the past four years without any help from her. Jamie may have a legitimate reason for leaving without saying goodbye.

  As others stood and jostled Patti, her pulse raced and heat rushed to her face. I don’t have claustrophobia. I don’t have claustrophobia. Breathe.

  She forced herself to think about Jamie rather than all the people.

  Jamie had a certain sparkle and charm people gravitated towards.

  Patti was the quiet one, the awkward one, the one who always felt out of place. She wasn’t jealous.

  Patti frowned. Stop lying to yourself.

  That’s exactly what it was.

  4

  Palm trees lined the drive on both sides. Huge beautiful tropical flowers were planted between each tree.

  The taxi pulled up to a small sentry building by a gate which protected the exclusive community.

  A man stepped from the gatehouse. He bent down and peered into the car.

  “Hello, Ms. Jakowski. How are you today? I didn’t realize you were out.” He looked down at a clipboard and then back up at her. “No record of you leaving. Did something happen to your car?”

  Patti was too stunned to reply.

  Jamie actually lives in this place. How had her sister managed that?

  The guard waited for an answer.

  “I’m…I’m not Jamie. I’m her twin sister, Patti. I’m here to visit Sabrina.” Patti gulped. “Does…does Jamie travel a lot?”

  The guard stared at her open-mouthed, shook his head, and then smiled. “Wow, identical twins, huh?”

  She nodded.

  “Sure. She travels a lot for work. I know she hates leaving Sabrina so much, but…” The man shrugged. “She’s got to pay the bills, right? She’ll usually go for a week, or so. Sometimes, she comes back for just a day before she has to leave again.”

  Perhaps, she’d married a rich man. It had always been one of Jamie’s many lifelong goals. She must have succeeded. But then again, why not? Everything came so easy to Jamie. She pushed the angry thoughts away. Right now, she needed to focus on Sabrina, not Jamie. “When was the last time you saw Jamie?”

  He walked over to the guard shack and came back holding a paper. “She checked in yesterday about two p.m. and never left again.”

  How could that be? A second twinge of concern. She’d been so busy assuming Jamie messed up again, she hadn’t considered the possibility of a serious problem. In spite of their issues, Patti loved Jamie.

  Patti stared out the window as they drove past a private golf course, and then a beautiful clubhouse. Each house sported an immaculate landscaped lawn which abounded with exotic flowers and shrubs. Thinking of her own tiny bungalow in Ohio City she’d worked so hard to buy, she couldn’t imagine living in such luxury.

  Her stomach twisted.

  What had her sister done to afford a house in a place like this?

  Jamie had been trying to break into the acting business, but as far as Patti knew, her sister hadn’t gotten her big break. Being a waitress didn’t pay for these kinds of houses.

  The taxi turned into a circular drive leading to a huge house. It reminded her of the plantation from Gone with the Wind, including the white marble pillars.

  He nodded. “This is it.”

  5

  The door opened before she hit the doorbell.

  A stout woman with short, black hair sprinkled with gray, stood before her. “Miss Patti? I’m Anna Martino, Sabrina’s nanny. Oh, my. You look just like Miss Jamie. She talks about you mucho. Always showing Sabrina pictures of you and telling her stories about her Aunt Patti.”

  The revelation surprised Patti to the point of speechlessness. She recovered after a few seconds. “So, have you heard from Jamie, yet?”

  Anna’s eyes darkened, and her smile faded. “No, something is wrong. She always calls us.”

  “I understand what you’re saying Mrs. Martino, but at this point—”

  “Si, si. You tell me this already.” She smiled at Patti once again. “Sabrina is very excited to meet you. Come in. Come in.” Anna led the way. “And please call me Anna.”

  “I’m excited to meet her as well.” Her jaw dropped open as she crossed the threshold.

  She said nothing as she looked up at the vaulted cathedral ceiling and the loft. The living room was done all in white, white sofas, white carpet, white coffee tables, and white walls. Elegant was the only word to describe it. Judging from the outside, she’d expected a beautiful house, but she wasn’t prepared for the opulence.

  Patti scrimped and saved every penny to buy her little house, but it was a shack compared to this place.

  She looked at the marble stands, the white leather furniture, and the snow-white rug that adorned the sitting area in front of the marble-white fireplace.

  Her gaze moved upwards to the picture hanging above the fireplace, the only color in the room.

  It showed a stylized figure of girl staring at her reflection in the mirror. Instead of the reflection being the same, it showed the same face, but with a darker feel. The girl was reaching through the mirror as if to hug her reflection or to pull her into the darkness of her own world.

  Patti walked over to examine the picture more closely. She looked at the signature.

  A Picasso!

  The painting wasn�
�t the real thing, was it? Considering the quality of the rest of the house, it very well could be.

  Anna motioned for her to sit. “I will go get Sabrina so she can finally meet her tia.”

  I have nothing to feel guilty about. Jamie was the one who broke the ties. Jamie was the one who ruined Patti’s chance at happiness. Jamie was the one who chose to stop coming home to Ohio. If Jamie had ever bothered to come back, they might have fixed their fractured relationship.

  Anna walked back in holding Sabrina’s hand. A beautiful child. Her shiny black hair was chin length and straight, her forehead covered by bangs. With beautiful olive-colored skin and dark eyes surrounded by thick dark eyelashes, it was obvious she hadn’t inherited Patti and Jamie’s pale coloring.

  Her niece.

  Her eyes filled with tears. “Hi.” Patti smiled.

  Instead of answering, Sabrina’s arm encircled Anna’s one leg. She hid her face.

  Anna shrugged. “She’s shy sometimes.” She lowered her voice. “And she have trouble with making all her sounds. She goes to speech therapy two times every week.”

  Patti nodded in understanding, remembering Sabrina’s phone call and the problems they had communicating.

  Anna pulled her away from her leg. “Mi poquita, say hello to Tia Patti.”

  One eye peeked out at her. Without warning Sabrina ran over and stared at Patti. “You wook wike Mommy.”

  Patti smiled at her niece. “You’re right, honey. I do look like your mommy, but I’m your Aunt Patti. Remember? We talked on the phone.”

  “Aunt Patti?” Sabrina yelled as if just making the connection.

  “That’s me, sweetie.” Patti reached her arms out to the little girl, who tumbled into them.

  Sabrina snuggled into Patti. The four-year-old smelled of grape soda. She felt warm and loveable as she clung to Patti.

  Patti’s heart melted.

  “I can only stay a few days.”

  Sabrina looked at Patti. Her mouth trembled and her eyes filled with tears. “You mad at me, Aunt Patti?” Her lips puckered.

  Patti patted her arm.“No, honey. I’m not mad at you. It’s just….”

  “Then why can’t you stay?”Anna asked.

  She didn’t have a good answer. School was finished for the summer, and her time was her own to do as she wished. It seemed selfish of her not to want to help out her adorable niece, but she didn’t deal well with the unexpected.

  And this situation was very much unexpected.

  “It’s just that…I don’t know…I’m sure Jamie will be back long before Monday. This is just like Jamie to—” Patti stopped midsentence and looked around the house.

  None of this seemed like Jamie in the least. Jamie with a mansion. Jamie with a daughter.

  She shook her head not knowing how to finish the sentence.

  Anna and Patti sat in the middle of the stark white living room staring at each other, neither knowing what to say or do.

  Finally, Patti broke the silence. “I guess the best thing is to follow Sabrina’s usual schedule. That will make her less anxious.”

  “Oh, she’s not anxious. Miss Jamie is gone mucho with her work. Sabrina is used to her mommy being gone, aren’t you, poquita?”Anna hugged Sabrina close to her.

  Sabrina nodded as she wiggled out of Anna’s arms. Anna focused her attention on Sabrina as if Patti weren’t there.

  “Well, well, Miss Sabrina. What do you want now?”

  “I want to play.”

  “OK, then. We go to your playroom.”

  Sabrina and Anna walked towards a closed door.

  Anna looked back at Patti. “You can come.”

  Patti followed them down a marble tiled hallway to another door.

  Anna opened the door and Sabrina ran through the doorway.

  It was larger than Patti’s living room and kitchen combined. Two purple overstuffed sofas formed an L shape. Orange and white pillows littered the sofa and the floor. Lots of windows and a sliding door made up one wall to let in the afternoon sun. Huge modern art hung on the walls, also in shades of purple and orange. Toys were scattered across the floor, and a large flat screen TV hung on the wall.

  This room felt like more like Jamie.

  Overflowing bookcases lined the wall. Jamie loved to read as much as Patti. It was one of their few common interests. They’d often read the same book, and then discussed it into the wee hours of the morning.

  Patti’s eyes teared up at the memory. Funny how she’d forgotten that.

  Sabrina ran to the toy chest and grabbed a baby doll.

  “Miss Sabrina,” Anna called to her in a stern voice, but she glanced at Patti with a smile.

  Patti had a feeling Sabrina had Anna wrapped around her little finger.

  “This room is a mess. You need to put your toys away before you can play.”

  Sabrina looked at Anna as if deciding whether to push her, or not. “Otay.” Sabrina sat the doll back in its crib and began picking up the toys and placing them in the toy boxes.

  Anna turned toward Patti. “Miss Jamie very strict. She always make her clean up before letting her play again. Of course, the room will be a mess again before you know it, but it is a rule.”

  Patti motioned around the room. “This looks much more like Jamie than out there.”

  “She spend most time here. Other room just for show.”

  Patti stepped closer. “Anna, why would she leave in the middle of the night without telling you?”

  Anna’s eyes darkened and a troubled look crossed her face. She walked over and sat on the couch. Patti followed. “Miss Jamie would never do that. She adore Sabrina. Ella es una madre muy buena. Miss Jamie would never leave without telling her goodbye. We have a routine.”

  Patti’s stomach flip-flopped at the conviction in Anna’s voice. “What’s that?”

  “They give each other kisses and more kisses. Then, Miss Jamie take Sabrina’s picture with her cell phone, and Sabrina take her Mommy’s picture with mine. More kisses and hugs, and then Miss Jamie leave, but she calls her two or three times as she is traveling to the airport.”

  “Then what do you think happened?”

  Anna shook her head. “I don’t know. Miss Jamie would never leave Sabrina without saying adios, unless…”

  “Unless? Unless what, Anna?” Her voice grew urgent. “If you have an idea what might have happened, you need to tell me.”

  Anna shook her head. “All I was going to say is something bad must have happened.”

  “Do you know anything about her job? Where she works or why she travels so much? Anything. If we knew, we might be able to track her down.”

  Anna looked at Patti for several long moments as if trying to decide how much she should trust this stranger. Finally, as if she’d come to a decision, she nodded. “She not really work much the first few years we live here, and she didn’t travel, but then she start to travel some. About a year ago, she began to travel mucho.”

  “What did she tell you about the travel?”

  “She not talk about it. I know when she get home from trips, she acted nervous and upset. Sometime, I hear her crying at night during her dreams. After a few days, she would calm down and be OK.”Anna sighed and twisted her hands. “Until she would leave again.”

  Nightmares had always been a problem for Jamie, especially during times of stress.

  “How long have you worked for her?”

  “I moved in with her when she pregnant. I drove Miss Jamie to the hospital. I was her Lamaze coach.” Anna said, naming a popular birthing process.

  More guilt, but Patti refused to accept it. She hadn’t known Jamie was pregnant. She’d have helped. A little voice in her head asked if she was sure about that. She ignored the voice. “Do you know anything about Sabrina’s father?”

  Anna shook her head. “These are things she won’t talk about. When I try, she either gets sad, or mad, so I stop asking.”

  “What does she talk about?” Patti asked as she pi
cked up a tiny orange pillow off the sofa and hugged it to herself. She needed to learn more about Jamie’s life with Anna and Sabrina.

  Something was wrong.

  It wasn’t like Jamie to be secretive. If anything, Jamie was the opposite. She had loved to tell everyone about everything, always assuming everyone wanted to know about the minutia of her life.

  “Lately, she’s been talking about moving home. She said soon we would live in Ohio.”

  “Really?” Patti’s mouth dropped open.

  She hadn’t talked with Jamie in almost seven years. The last thing she expected was her sister to have a child, and then desert her. They hadn’t been raised in such a way. Her worry moved up another notch and was close to becoming anxiety.

  Patti turned to Anna. “Did she say why she couldn’t move back right now?”

  “Just the job was not over, but soon it would be finished and she could go home. She would smile when she talked about going home, about you. She loves you mucho. Miss Jamie didn’t smile much lately.”

  The rocks in Patti’s stomach grew larger.

  “She want me to go with them, but I don’t know. Not after I hear her tell Sabrina about the snow and the winters. They sound very bad.”

  “They can get nasty.”

  “Where is your luggage? Your things? I will take them up to the guest room.”

  “The airlines lost it. From now on, I’ll only take carry-on luggage. I guess I better go shopping.”

  Anna tapped her chin and frowned. “Not necessary. You look same size as Miss Jamie so you can wear her clothes. She not mind. Very nice of you to fly down to help Sabrina. God bless you, such a good woman.”

  Patti bit her lip, shamed by Anna’s words. She didn’t feel like a good woman, and she was sure God hadn’t been pleased with her attitude when she’d first learned about Sabrina.

  She’d come down out of guilt, not love. But now that she was here, she was so glad she’d made the right decision. “I didn’t know I had a niece. Did Jamie tell you why she never told me about Sabrina?”

  “She say you very busy. No need her interrupting your life.”

  Patti stared at Anna.

  Why would Jamie say such a thing? Jamie knew she’d never be too busy to spend time with her niece, no matter what the situation between the two of them.