Worth It All

by L. J. Swartz

  We walk into the club. David got us right in of course. I gotta admit I've kind of missed being able to go out to the club. Declan asks, "What we all drinkin?" David shakes his head no. I look up at him. He really doesn't seem bothered by being here. "Go ahead baby," he tells me kissing my lips. "No babe I'm good," I tell him. He looks to Declan saying, "She likes Rum and Coke." Declan nods then takes Rian's hand leading her to the bar. I take David's face in my hands saying, "Baby I don't want to drink." He slides his hands to my hips saying, "Sadie, I'm fine ok. I'm not an alcoholic. I'm mean when I drink. There's a difference." I give him a look then say, "One drink. Then I'm done." He chuckles saying, "Whatever you say." I hear someone call out his name. He leans down kissing me slowly. "David," a female voice says next to us. He pulls away. I’m looking at a beautiful blonde bombshell. She has tattoos on her arms, but is wearing a conservative plum colored shift dress that's throwing me off a bit. "Chanel this is my girlfriend Sadie. Sadie, Chanel. She’s the reason we're here," he explains. I smile as I shake her hand saying, "Nice to meet you." She nods then looks to David saying, "So business first? Drinks later." He smiles saying politely, "I don't drink." She nods then says, "Shall we," motioning toward a table. "Go ahead baby. I'm gonna wait for Dec and Rian," I tell him. He kisses me quickly then says, "Ok come find me as soon as they get back." I nod my agreement as I wipe my lipstick from his lips. He follows Chanel to the table. I look around for Declan and Rian. I walk to the bar, but they aren't there. I wait for a few minutes then decide to just go sit with David. I make my way through the crowd when someone grabs my hips from behind. Heat spreads through my body. He pulls me to him. "You're the prettiest woman here," Vance whispers next to my ear. I hold in a moan then turn to face him making his hands drop from my hips. "Thank you. I need to get back to David," I say then turn to walk away. "Sadie," I hear him call out two seconds before I hear a familiar voice call out, "Vance baby I'm here." I look over my shoulder as Brittany throws her arms around his neck. He pulls her to him, but holds my gaze. I huff then walk through the crowd to David. Chanel's holding up a glass of wine or champagne maybe. He’s holding up a drink as well. They tap them together before each taking a drink. "Hey," I say as I get to the table. "Hey baby. Where's Declan and Rian," he asks with a smile on his face. "I don't know," I say with a shrug then take his drink from him taking a sip. It's soda, nothing else, just soda. He raises his eyes brow at me. I hand it back to him then bite my lip. He looks pretty smug knowing I thought he was drinking behind my back. "Let's go dance," I say bouncing on my feet. A smile creeps to his lips as he stands saying, "Thank you for this opportunity Chanel, I can't wait. Now if you'll excuse me. I need to go dance with my girl." She nods holding her drink up to us saying, "Have a great time. I'll be in touch." He grabs my hand leading me to the dance floor. He pulls me in close and starts to move us to the music. It's not a slow song, but it's also not fast either. I wrap my arms around him closing my eyes. It's so nice to be with David, and not be afraid of him. "Hey there you guys are," I hear Rian call out. Declan taps my shoulder then hands me my drink. Her and Declan stay next to us and start to dance. I look up at David. He holds my gaze as he says, "Baby it's fine." I take a sip. It's divine. It's been a long time since I've had one of these. "Good isn't it," he asks with a smile. "David you can have a drink. Just don't get drunk," I tell him. He shakes his head no. I raise my eye brow at him as I take another sip. He pulls me close again moving us to the music. After another couple songs. We make our way to the table Chanel was at. She's gone. We sit down. I look to David. I can see the dance floor behind him. My eyes are instantly locked in on Vance and Brittany. She’s dancing like a slut. Rubbing her ass all on him. He kisses down her neck. I look to the table taking a deep breath. David looks over his shoulder then back to me. "You're not over him, are you," he asks drawing my attention back to him. "David that's crazy. We were never anything more than....." I trail off then add, "I love you David. You're perfect for me." He smiles then leans in kissing me slowly. I pull back searching his face. He looks like he wants to say something. "What," I ask. He clears his throat then says, "Chanel offered me a store in L.A. I want you to go with me." He searches my face for my reaction. "David I, I'm working here in New York," I tell him since I don't know what else to say. I'm with David so it would make sense that I would go with him, but I look over his shoulder at Vance. "I know but when the movie raps you could move with me to L.A. You'd have way more opportunities there. We'd get a new start Sade," he explains excitedly. He really wants this. "If you don't go with me, I'm not taking it. I told her that," he tells me. Now I'm speechless. The old David would have left me behind in a heartbeat. He slides from the edge of the bench kneeling down on one knee in front of me. I gasp clasping my hands over my mouth. "Sadie, I lost you once. I was nothing without you. I will spend the rest of my life showing you how much you mean to me. Will you marry me," he asks. I glance up. Vance is watching. I look back to David smiling like a goon as I say, "Yes. Yes to everything." He stands pulling me into his arms. "I love you so much Sadie," he tells me. My eyes lock with Vance's as I say, "I love you too." He steps back then pulls the ring from the box. It's exquisite, classic. It's a huge princess cut diamond on a platinum band. He slips it onto my finger. I look at it a second then squeal throwing my arms around his neck again. "Oh my god," Rian calls out as she walks to us looking at my hand. I step around David hugging her to me saying, "I know. We're getting married and moving to L.A." She pulls away with a weak smile on her face and asks, "Really?" I nod happily saying, "Yes Rian. I couldn't be happier." She nods then pulls me back into a hug. Declan wraps us both up saying, "Well hell yes. We need to celebrate." I smile up at him then look over my shoulder at David. He mouths, "I love you." I glance over Rian's shoulder watching as Vance practically drags Brittany toward the door. I feel the most overwhelming urge to run after him. "I need a drink," I announce.

  I’ve been so busy trying to plan our move. I haven't had time for much else. The last two weeks have flown by. David has been basically living with me at my place. I explained to him how our old place made me uncomfortable. We don't go there. He’s leaving next week to open his store in L.A. From what Victor tells me we're about a month from wrapping on the movie then I'll join him. I would be lying if I said I wasn't worried about sending David to L.A. without me for a month. Honestly I'm not so sure I won't just quite the movie and leave with him. He tells me he's got everything under control, but he's come so far. I'd hate to see him back track now. The door to our trailer opens. Vance walks in. He looks gorgeous as ever in a red v neck, ripped jeans, and his black boots. Things have been so awkward with him especially since David and I got engaged. He looks like he was up all night drinking or doing something else. "Hey you ok," Rian asks him. He smiles at her then sits on the stool. She shoots me a look. Her and Vance have gotten close for obvious reasons. We have an agreement that's working pretty well. I don't ask, and she doesn't tell. I nod my understanding saying, "I'm gonna grab some water, Vance," I ask as I stop next to the stool. He looks to me holding my gaze. "God I miss hearing that beautiful voice of yours saying my name," he says taking the breath right out of me. I look to Rian. Her eyes are wide globes. Surprise is written all over her face. My heart rate picks up. I'm finding it hard to breath. He reaches out touching my hand. Heat courses through me almost knocking me to my knees. It's so much more intense than before. I hold his gaze as he opens his mouth saying, "I was wrong. I was so wrong to push you away." I pull my hand from his holding his gaze a minute. I can’t take this. I walk from the trailer. I think it's best I talk to Victor about going to L.A. with David instead of waiting until the movie wraps. I walk into the food room and grab a couple waters. I walk back out the door running into hard muscle. I drop the waters to the floor as Vance slides his hands to my hips. I wrap my arms around his neck pulling him to me. Our lips meet. We both moan. He slides his tongue into my mouth. I suck on it, enjoying the taste of him. He groans loudly
grinding himself against me. I know it's wrong, but I pull myself up his body wrapping my legs around him tightly. I stop kissing him and just hold him to me. We're both panting. "Don't," he starts. I push my finger tips to his lips shaking my head. He kisses them. I sigh and unwrap myself. I look him right in the eyes as I say, "Goodbye Vance. I'll never forget you." He closes his eyes. I walk out around him to find Victor. I need out of here now. I get back to the trailer and smile as I open the door to Rian, Victor, and my hot fiancé. "Hey baby," David says walking to me. I pull him into a hug kissing his cheek. "I've made my decision," I tell him with a smile. He looks at me expectantly. "I just can't bare the thought of being away from you right now," I tell him and laugh as he picks me off my feet spinning me around. He sits me down. I look to Victor. He pulls his phone out saying, "On it. I'm happy for you baby." He stands kissing my cheek as he walks out the door. Rian stands and hugs me saying, "I'm coming to L.A. every chance I get." I hold her tightly saying, "You better."

  It's been 6 months since David and I moved to L.A. We are planning on getting married in a couple months. David's store is doing better than expected. Chanel mentioned him possibly heading up a couple in Paris. How amazing would it be to live in Paris? I've been working on a movie set for the past two weeks. There’s a couple big name actors involved, but after the first meeting it’s easy to see their just like the rest of us. The guy burps and eats like a pig. The woman just had a baby and breast feeds while I'm doing her hair. It pays an ass ton more than my last job though. Thanks to Chanel I got this one. So far everyone seems to like me. David and I bought a condo and have been having it remodeled which may have been for nothing if we get sent to Paris. I'm not stuck in a crummy trailer. I have a beautiful room of my own. There's a wall of mirrors with actual chairs for my actors to sit in. The door opens. I turn and squeal. Rian walks in and throwing her arms around my neck. I’ve only seen her once since we left New York. "This is the best surprise ever. What are you doing here," I ask. She pulls away with a weak smile. "Is everything ok," I ask. She clears her throat saying, "Uh yeah, but um I'm kind of getting married this weekend." She holds up her left hand. "What," I yell happily as I take her hand in mine. The ring is gorgeous, vintage styled not surprising. "Declan and I are pregnant. We wanted you to be apart of it so we decided to come here and do it," she tells me. "Oh my god," I yell clasping my hands over my mouth. "I know right. It's all happening pretty fast. We just found out, but I'm 3 1/2 months pregnant so we wanna get married before I'm a blimp. So what do ya say? Will you be my maid of honor," she asks excitedly. "Hell yes I will," I tell her. Someone appears in the door behind her. My heart falls to my toes. I feel like I may pass out. Vance steps through the open door. "Hey Sadie," he says searching my face. I don't say anything, I can't. I thought I was over him. Done with him forever. The heat coursing through my body threatening to choke me to death would suggest otherwise. Rian gives me an apologetic look mouthing "sorry." I nod at her then lock in on him as he walks to us. "You look amazing. L.A. agrees with you," he says holding my gaze. I can see his breathing is labored. "Thank you," I say finally finding my voice. I turn away from them grabbing my water taking a drink. "You're not married, yet," he asks pointing to my engagement ring. "Two months," I tell him. He nods his head then looks to the ground. "Look Sadie, I know we parted on unsteady terms, but I really want us to be able to be around each other. Ya know with the baby and all. I'm sure we'll be around each other more," he explains. I nod and try to smile as I say, "Of course. I don't see why not. There's no reason we can't be friends." He smiles then closes his eyes as I hear, "Vance where are you?" Brittany walks into the room. "Hey Sadie good to see you," she says as she steps up next to him wrapping her arm around his waist. "Hey Brittany it's great to see you too," I tell her faking a smile. "Sadie we need you on set," Victor says from the doorway. I smile at him as he takes in everyone standing in my room. I was so happy when I found out he'd be working on this movie with me. After I left New York something happened between him and Makayla. He got fired. I got hired for this movie. We had lost touch. I found out he was working in L.A and tried to find him. He showed up on set the first day of filming. We've been inseparable since. I talked to him about Vance and pretty much everything that happened. "Hey guys," he says shooting me a look. "Oh my god Victor," Rian yells then runs to him wrapping her arms around him. "Hey sweet pea, how are you," he asks wrapping his arms around her. He looks to Vance and Brittany then back to me as Rian steps back. "I really wanna catch up with you guys, but Sade we're on a time crunch today," he tells me looking to Vance the Rian. I nod at him then turn to Rian saying, "Sorry I'll call you when I'm off, ok." She hugs me quickly. I grab my things off the counter then follow Victor out. Once we round the corner he stops and grabs my shoulder turning me to him saying, "Oh my god. I could feel the energy between you two." I sigh as I shake my head saying, "Yeah well he's still with Brittany. I'm marrying David in two months. We'll have to just be friends. Oh yeah Rian and Declan are pregnant and getting married this weekend," I tell him. He gasps saying, "That's awesome for her. Now back to you. I," he starts. I cut him off saying, "I'm marrying David. Vic please let this go." I walk around him on set. "Ok Sadie perfect. We need you to get Vance ready," Rebecca, another assistant like Victor tells me. I give her a funny look asking, "Excuse me?" Vance walks up next to us saying, "Hey I am uh, in this movie." I swallow hard then look to Victor. He knew that bitch. "Well no time like the present to start being friends right," I say motioning to my side vanity on set. He walks over and sits down. I point at Victor shaking my head. He smiles deviously then turns walking off. I walk to Vance shaking my head. "I didn't know you worked for this movie until Rian told me. I can quit," he tells me. I look to him saying, "Why would you do that? This is fine. If it wasn't for working with you on the last movie, I probably wouldn't have even gotten this job." I pick up the script. I never read ahead to see what characters were played by who. That will change from now on. I find Vance's character. He's playing a man who's in love with his best friend’s girl. His hair is to be super stylish. I look to him saying, "Be right back." He nods his understanding. I hold his gaze a minute. Why is he back now? I'm about to marry David. Now he shows up throwing my entire world of kilter. I turn and walk away. I find Rebecca and ask, "Can I cut Vance's hair or just style it?" She flips through some papers then reads something and smiles. "Yep you can cut it," she says then walks away. I walk to my room grabbing my cape, comb, and shears. I walk back to Vance. He has a huge smile on his face. "What," I ask a bit annoyed as I step up behind him. "I just can't see a cape without thinking of you that first day. I was so happy when you stumbled. I got to touch you," he says meeting my gaze in the mirror. "Ok rule number one about being friends. No reminiscing about how we met or anything to do with when we were ya know," I say then drape the cape around him. "If that's what you want," he says looking to the cape as I snap it around his neck. "It is," I tell him. He nods. He watches me as I cut his hair into a stylish fade on the sides with it long on top. I clean all the hair from him then grab the pomade and mess it up into a sort of fo hawk. "Rebecca," I call out. She walks over then smiles a huge smile. "Oh my god, perfect. You're amazing Sadie," she tells me then looks to Vance saying, "Gwen needs you in wardrobe.” I remove the cape from his neck then start to sweep up the hair from the floor. "You are amazing Sadie," he says then stands watching. "Crossing a line, Vance," I say as I continue sweeping. "Sadie look at me," he commands. It's not authoritative. It's desperate. I look up. "Tell me you feel it because I feel it and it's driving me crazy," he says looking frustrated. I shake my head no. I can't actually say the words because I do feel it. I just can't tell him that. I'm engaged to David that means something to me. "Fine. I guess this is what I get for pushing you away. I have to stand back and watch another man make you happy," he says then walks away. I love this job, but I’m really rooting for Paris about now. I clean up my mess then go back to my room. I sigh smiling weakly as I w
alk to David wrapping my arms around his neck. He's safe, comfortable. "Hey baby what's wrong," he asks next to my ear. I swear I smell alcohol, but it can't be. He doesn't drink, ever. "Vance is in this movie," I tell him as I pull back. He takes my face in his hands saying, "Well it's gonna be awkward right?" I nod tilting my head up pressing a kiss to his lips. He slips his tongue into my mouth. I definitely taste mouth wash and liquor. I pull back asking, "Babe have you been drinking?" He gets a funny look on his face. "Sade it was one drink, ok. Chanel came in. We're going to Paris baby," he tells me with a huge smile. "When," I ask coldly. He steps back with narrowed eyes saying, "The Monday after the wedding." I shake my head saying, "No when did you have the drink?" He clears his throat. "Uh at the store an hour or so ago," he tells me hesitantly. "You promised Van, David," I say the close my eyes adding, "I'm sorry. It's just been a day of surprises and I'm all messed up." I open my eyes and go sit in one of the chairs. "Ok first off it was one celebratory drink. Second did you just almost call me Vance," he asks angrily. "I'm sorry ok. Rian and Declan are having a baby and getting married this weekend here in L.A. Then Vance shows up and is working on this movie saying shit that's out of line. Then you come in smelling of liquor for the first time since we got back together. Oh and we're moving to Paris two days after we get married. I’m a little overwhelmed," I bark at him. "Sadie," he says as walks to me. "Everything ok in here," Vance asks from the door. Oh god he has the worst timing ever. "We're just fine actor boy," David says reaching for me pulling me from the chair into his arms. "I'm sorry baby," he tells me then pulls away. "You know. I know I don't deserve her, so I let her go. You'd get my respect if you did the same. We all know you're not good enough for her," Vance says stepping into the room. "Vance what the fuck," I bark stepping up in front of him holding my hands back catching David's thighs holding him behind me. "She makes me a better man. Maybe if you had gotten over yourself. You would have realized that yourself. Not that I'm angry. I get to be her husband thanks to your stupidity," David tells him. Vance huffs saying, "You'll screw this up. When you do, I'll be there." Vance walks from the room. "Cripes," I say as I turn to David then ask, "Can we go to Paris now?" He smiles as he touches my face saying, "I'll call Chanel. I'm sorry about the drink Sade. I won't do it again." I nod then stand on my toes to kiss him.