His Every Need

by Terri L. Austin

  “Quite.” He didn’t take his eyes from her. “Monica, do you wish to speak to your sister alone?”

  “Not particularly,” she mumbled.

  Trevor shrugged. “There, you see?”

  “Get out.”

  He kicked the cold smile up a notch. “Make me.”

  Taking a step toward him, she kept a tight hold on her purse strap, if not her composure. “Don’t tempt me. You know it’s really funny that you’re here—”

  “Yes, I’m laughing uproariously.” He flicked an eyebrow.

  “Because you were the one who accused me of interfering in your life. Now, here you are.” She pointed a finger at him. “Interfering.”

  He stepped closer to her, his shins hitting the god-awful bed that stretched between them. “Your sister asked me to be here. It’s not the same thing.”

  Tugging her purse off her shoulder, she dropped it on the bed. “It is the same thing. It is exactly the same thing.”

  He glanced at the purse lying on the brown and orange swirls. If there was one natural fiber on the stained fabric, he’d eat it. “Do you know what’s on that bedspread?”

  Allie turned to Monica. “Will you give us a few minutes?”

  Monica leaned against the dresser and watched them with wary eyes. “Um, yeah. I’ll just go get a Coke or something.”

  “We are going to talk, Mon. And if you decide to run off again, you don’t know what pissed looks like.”

  “Okay, Al. Jeez.” She grabbed her purse, which was sitting on top of the dresser, and started for the door.

  “Leave the purse, Monica,” Trevor said. He didn’t want to have to go on another wild-goose chase either.

  “Oh my God, you two are so lame.” Despite her protests, she dropped her bag and held out her hand. “Got a couple of bucks?”

  Trevor reached into his wallet and pulled out a twenty. “I saw a burger place across the street. Get yourself something to eat and be back here in thirty minutes. Understand?”

  “And be careful,” Allie said. “This is a dangerous part of town.”

  “Yeah, yeah.” Monica snatched the money and left the room.

  Trevor turned his attention to Allie as he thrust his wallet back into his trouser pocket. “What’s your big plan?”

  “None of your business.”

  “You’ve made it my business, darling, by asking me to bail her out of jail. When you had your whole family move into my house, when you came to me to plead your father’s case. It was fine then.”

  She crossed her arms and glared at him, her jaw tight. “We have new rules. I want you out of my life.”

  “That’s a pity.” He brushed his sleeve and adjusted the cuff of his shirt.

  She grabbed her purse by the strap and in short, angry movements, slung it over her shoulder. Without another word, she turned on her heel and rushed toward the door.

  But Trevor was quicker. Even from his position across the room, he made it to the door before she did and stood with his back against it, blocking her escape. He couldn’t let her leave. Just looking at her wasn’t enough. He needed to touch her, smell her. “We’re not done here.”

  “Yeah, Trevor, we are. I expected too much from you. You’re incapable of loving me, you’re incapable of change. And I need more. I need a man—” She stopped and pulled a shaky breath. “I need a man who loves me beyond reason, who wants to have kids with me, grow old with me. I love you so much it hurts.” Tears filled her eyes as she tapped her chest with a fist. “But I want what my parents had. And you’re not the man to give it to me. So please, let me go.”

  He froze as still as a statue, his chest aching so badly he thought he might die from the pain. “Allison—”

  “Please, Trevor.” Her gaze left his eyes and drifted toward the knot in his tie. “If I stay with you, it will destroy me.”

  He rubbed his sternum. How could he let her go? But what reason had he given her to stay? He couldn’t give her what she needed. He didn’t do commitment, marriage, little league games.

  Slowly, he shifted, then opened the door, and left. As he walked away from her, he’d never felt so hollow, so bereft. Not even when his grandfather passed away.

  ***

  Allie stared at the faux wood door and blinked back tears. She was damn tired of crying. She was going to have to get used to life without Trevor. Might as well start now.

  But how was she supposed to get through life without ever seeing him again? Touching him, hearing his voice?

  She sat down on the bed, stared at the floor. The carpet was old, brown, and crusty with things she didn’t want to think about.

  She wasn’t sure how long she sat, silent, hurting, but when the door opened, Allie finally remembered where she was. Monica. Right.

  “Shit, Al, you look awful.” Monica parked herself on the bed.

  “Thanks.”

  “I tried to give you some time, but it’s been like, forty-five minutes. Sorry about Trevor.” When Monica reached out and took her hand, Allie choked back a sob. “You’re still breathing and everything, but inside, you feel like a zombie? I get it. When Brad broke up with me…well, I know you think he’s an asshole, but I really love him, you know?”

  Allie squeezed her sister’s hand. “I do.”

  They sat quietly for some minutes. Then Allie straightened her spine and glanced around the room. “This place is—”

  “Disgusting. I know. But it’s all I could afford. I finally got a job, and it sucks ass.”

  “Yeah, they usually do. Where are you working?” Allie asked.

  “Taco Shack. And just a head’s up, don’t eat the Bomba Burrito. I’m not sure what they put in the sauce, but it looks like puke.”

  “Thanks for the tip.” Allie squeezed Monica’s hand once more before letting go. “I’m sorry, Mon. I’m sorry for everything. I’ve been so busy trying to hold it all together that I became kind of mean.”

  “I would have gone with ‘controlling bitch,’ but that’s just me.”

  Allie shot her a glance. “I’ll admit to controlling. I just wanted what was best for you. Right before she died, I made Mom a promise to look after all of you. I was really terrible at it.”

  “No, you weren’t.” Monica bumped Allie’s shoulder with her own. “I’ve been kind of a bitch too. And Brad never cared about me. Not like I cared about him. And that’s crazy painful.”

  Allie could relate. After all this time, she and Monica finally had something in common. Trevor didn’t love her at all. And the reality of that was excruciating. If Monica was feeling the same way, Allie had nothing but compassion for her sister. No “I told you so.” Just empathy.

  “So what’s next?” Allie asked. “Are you going to stay here? This neighborhood is pretty scary.” She didn’t want to be the first one to mention home. She was trying to respect Monica’s right to live her own life. Damn, letting go was hard. But Allie’d made such a crappy job of her own life, she didn’t have much room to criticize.

  “Think Dad will let me come home?”

  Allie donned her poker face and tried to play it cool, but relief coursed through her. She’d have been worried sick if Monica stayed in this dump. “Probably. If you go back to school and follow the rules. I know that’s not what you want to hear.”

  “It won’t be so bad. And it’s not forever, right?”

  “Just until you figure out what you want to do next,” Allie said.

  “Are you moving back in too?”

  Allie nodded. “Yeah. For a while. I need to figure things out myself.” As she rose from the bed, she wrinkled her nose. “I think this place smells worse the longer I’m here.”

  Monica stood too. “Totally. And one more thing.” She winced, shoving her hands in the pockets of her shorts. “I’m g
oing to have to take summer school. I’ve fucked up too much this semester.” She rubbed at her tear-filled eyes. “Mom would be so pissed.”

  Allie threw her arm around Monica’s shoulders. “I think she’d be proud that you’re going back and getting your diploma. I’m proud of you.”

  Allie helped Monica toss her clothes in a duffel bag and then drove her home. As soon as they walked in the door, Brian was waiting, ready to pounce.

  “Where the hell have you been, Mon?” In three strides he stood in front of them, his eyes narrowed. “Do you know how worried we’ve been? Do you have any idea how terrified I was, not knowing where you were?” He reached out and pulled Monica into his arms. “Don’t you ever do that to me again, you hear?”

  Monica buried her face in the crook of his shoulder and sobbed.

  Allie left them and checked on Brynn. Her little sister sat on her bed with her laptop open and her earbuds in. She popped one out when Allie walked into the room.

  “Did you find her?” Brynn asked. “Was she mad that I told on her?”

  “No, she’s fine. She’s moving back home and going to summer school. Brad the Douche broke her heart. I’d really like to kick him in the balls for that.”

  “What about you, Al? Are you staying home?” Brynn’s mouth twisted to the side.

  Allie pushed at a lock of Brynn’s hair. “I’m staying for now. And I’m going to be all right. I promise.” Allie wasn’t sure how she’d get through this in one piece. But she had to try. Survive. That’s what the Campbell family did best.

  “I was worried when you wouldn’t get out of bed,” Brynn said. “That’s not like you. And I’m going to miss them all. Even Trevor.”

  “I know you will, honey. He’s a good man.”

  Brynn frowned and pulled the other bud out of her ear. “How can you say that? He broke up with you. What Brad the Douche did to Monica, Trevor did to you. You should hate him.”

  Allie patted Brynn’s leg and left the room. She wished she could hate Trevor. It would make things a lot easier.

  Chapter 23

  Allie handed the room card to the couple from Minnesota. “Here you go. Have a great stay, and if you need anything, just call the front desk.” She smiled and watched them walk to the elevator. Newlyweds. Sweet.

  She’d only been here for a few weeks, but she liked it. The casino was one of the larger ones on the Strip, and it was much better than her last job. Better pay, better hours. Couldn’t ask for more than that.

  Well, she could. She had. But she lost that hand, and it was best to put Trevor behind her and move on. Every time she thought about him, she’d flick the rubber band on her wrist. She’d done it so often, she had a bruise.

  He hadn’t called her, hadn’t come to see her. She absently pulled at the band and let it snap back, felt the sharp sting, and took a deep breath. No more morose thoughts. She was moving on.

  After work today, she even had an appointment to look at an apartment. It was time. Time to start living her own life. Serious boundary lines had been crossed with her family, and she needed to step back and put herself first for once. She’d always wanted to go back to school and finish her degree. Now was the perfect opportunity.

  And she wanted Trevor. Snap. Damn, that was starting to hurt.

  ***

  Trevor sat in the garden and stared at the pond. That was all he’d done lately. He didn’t have an appetite, didn’t have the concentration to work. He didn’t even give a damn if he lost every dime. He’d ignored his lawyer’s calls so often, the man had started showing up in person. Trevor just sent him away.

  Nigel and Mags had moved out, but they insisted on coming over. Each and every goddamned day.

  Trevor heard footsteps behind him but didn’t bother turning around. Nigel. Like clockwork, his father would seek him out at the same time every afternoon.

  “How’s tricks, Son?”

  “Same as yesterday. And the day before that,” Trevor said, his gaze remaining fixed on the water.

  “Swallow your pride. Go to her. She’s miserable. You’re miserable. Well, to be honest, you’ve always been a little stroppy.”

  “Allison called it pissy. And I can’t just go to her. The ball’s in her court, and it’s obvious she wants nothing to do with me.” But God, how he missed her. No, he didn’t just miss her. He fucking loved her. He hadn’t believed in the emotion. But somehow, Allison Campbell had fallen into his life and altered it completely. He wasn’t sure when he finally realized how he felt. Probably when he walked out of that disgusting motel room where Monica had been staying. He’d never felt so much pain in his life, walking away from the one person who brought him joy. Yes. Fucking joy. Trevor had experienced it with Allie, but he’d been too much of a git to realize it at the time.

  “So call her anyway. Send her something. Women like jewelry.”

  Not Allie. She wouldn’t give a damn about a diamond necklace. He’d deposited millions in her bank account. He thought that would get a rise out of her, but she hadn’t contacted him. Not once. He thought for sure she would reach out to him. But it was well and truly over. How was he supposed to carry on with this kind of ache in his gut? God, he even sounded like a mopey wanker. And for once, he didn’t even care.

  Nigel tapped Trevor’s leg. “You know I’m sorry about marrying Anna.”

  “She never mattered, not really. Your betrayal, that’s what stung.”

  “I know. I was a ghastly father. A worse husband, if you can believe that. To all of them. You’d think after five marriages, I’d have got it right at least once. But you, Trev, somehow you turned out better than Mags and I combined. Allison’s a treasure. And if she loves you, that’s saying something.”

  If Allie loved him so goddamned much, why didn’t she call? He knew he was being irrational. He’d told her he didn’t love her, taunted her when she declared her love for him. He all but packed her bags. Still, he’d made the last overture. And she simply didn’t care.

  He closed his eyes and laughed bitterly. What a joke. Allie realized he was a fuckwad just as Trevor finally realized he loved her.

  He didn’t deserve Allison Campbell. He never had.

  ***

  “Here’s your laundry room.” The apartment manager, Doreen, opened the tiny closet door. The small space was big enough for a stackable washer and dryer. If she could afford one.

  “One bedroom, galley kitchen, one bath.”

  “How much?” Allie looked around at the white walls, white ceiling, and off-white carpet with a sigh. Still, it would be her own place. It was a start.

  “Nine-fifty.”

  Allie shrugged. “I’ll take it.” Why didn’t she feel excited? This was a step in the right direction—new job, new apartment, new life. Without Trevor.

  She worked up a smile for Doreen and followed her out of the apartment to the front office where she signed off on the credit check and sat back in the chair to wait.

  After several minutes, Doreen smiled broadly. “Are you sure you don’t want to look at condos?”

  “I told you, I can’t afford it.”

  “Well, according to your bank statement you can.” She placed a paper in front of Allie.

  Allie hadn’t had any real expenses in the last few months, so she knew she had a small balance in her account. She pulled the paper closer and peered at the number. Blinking, she looked up from the paper to Doreen. “I’m going to kill him.”

  She barely remembered the drive from the apartment complex to Trevor’s house. She was fueled by rage. How dare he? He still thought she was a whore. He still thought he could control her. She was going to have the final word on this once and for all. British ass.

  When she pulled up to the gate, Carl smiled and waved.

  “Glad to see you again, Miss C—”

&
nbsp; She didn’t let him finish but accelerated up the drive before screeching to a halt in front of the house. She threw herself out of the car and charged to the door. Tapping her foot, she waited for Arnold to answer, and when he did, an unfamiliar smile stretched across his mouth.

  “Thank God you’re here.”

  Frances stood behind him. “He’s in the garden. Hurry now.”

  “The garden?” Allie echoed.

  “Oh yes. Spends most of his time there,” Frances said.

  Allie walked through the house and flung open the French doors. Dusk fell over the fragrant garden, streaking the sky with pink and lavender. The fairy lights came on, illuminating the blooming flowers as she followed the flagstone pathway.

  She found him on the bench beneath the arbor, elbows resting on his knees, staring into the water. Once she saw him, most of the anger fizzled and deep sadness took its place. She stood back and watched him, her eyes roaming over him, drinking him in. He seemed leaner, but just as beautiful. He wore cargo shorts and a wrinkled T-shirt. She didn’t know he owned anything other than suits.

  Allie slowly walked to the bench and sat down. “Hey.”

  He didn’t move. Didn’t look at her, respond to her.

  “You put five million dollars in my bank account.”

  “Yes.”

  “Why?”

  His body was tense, yet he didn’t move a muscle. “Because I wanted to. I always do what I want, you know that.”

  She clenched her hands into fists. Why wouldn’t he look at her? She couldn’t argue with him when he just sat there. “I don’t want your fuck money.”

  He turned his head then, and by the dim glow of the fading sun, she saw the despair in his eyes. “You’re not fucking me.”

  “Well, that’s what it was for, right? Services rendered? Paying off your whore? Is that what you do when you get tired of a mistress? Give her an obscene amount of money to make her go away?”

  “You’re the only mistress I’ve had, and I didn’t want you to go away.”